Moth to a Flame
by KiwiStar
Summary: Her bad luck streak was something even he couldn't fix. Add that to the fact that she was put into a storyline with a man who seems to hate her, and you have a complicated little moth, drawn to an even more complicated flame. Sheamus/OC
1. Cursed

**Why hello there:D If you are on this story from my Author's Alerts, this is the sequel to Unlikely Attractions, the one you guys requested:D If you got here from surfing the archive, welcome! This is the sequel to a story of mine called Unlikely Attractions, read it if you wish. I only own my OC, Shay. With this story, I decided to explore a bit and typed in Third-Person. With Shay returning to the ring soon, she'll need some new entrance music, don't you think? Vote on the poll on my profile. If none of those songs fit, just drop me a Private Message and I'll take your idea into account. Alright, have we covered everything? Yes? Beautiful, now please sit back, enjoy, read and review:D**

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><p>Jay watched as Shay moved across the room. She had gotten off her crutches almost a month ago, and she had gone back to her normal klutzy routine. The woman tripped, her arms reaching out for something to grab. He had risen out of his seat by habit. Shay grappled blindly, her hands finally finding something stable to hold on to. Jay winced and quickly moved through the crowd to her. The man she had grabbed on to stumbled back, his hands immediately went to her shoulders and stabilized her.<p>

Once Shay was back on her feet, she put her hands over her mouth. A blush tinted her cheeks. "I-I am so sorry."

"Shay!"Jay put his hand on her shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She assured him before turning her attention back to the other man. "Are you?"

He nodded. "I'll be fine." He smoothed out his shirt. "Bu' are yeh sure you're alrigh'?"

"Yeah, I-I've taken harder hits, rougher falls." Shay chuckled, embarrassment still evident in her voice. Jay tensed and Shay turned to him. "R-relax, Jay. Just be glad he caught me. I-I could've been back on crutches come morning." She gave him a small smile as she ran a hand through her hair. The situation was making her uncomfortable, altercations always made her want to crawl under a rock. Nobody was really paying attention. They had given her a glance when she fell, but went right back to what they were doing.

Crowds made her uneasy. It had always been that way, and she knew it would always be that way. Strangers and people she wasn't used to put her on edge and she distanced herself from them when possible. Jay's hand fell from her shoulder. "Shay, don't joke about that."

"Come off it, Jay. I-it happened, it's behind me now."

"It was serious, we almost lost you again."

"I understand t-that, Jay." Her voice dropped low as she followed Jay to a table. She sat down across from him. "Jay, I'm trying to move on."

"I thought things would be different, Shay." He said suddenly, drawing Shay's attention.

"P-pardon me?"

"I heard about what happened earlier."

Shay sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. She fought the urge to roll her eyes and she drummed her fingers on the tabletop. "Jay, that was nothing."

"It wasn't nothing. She shouldn't talk to you like that. Things should've been different."

"Jay, I-I was in a car accident. Nothing changed after Dave or Nick. W-what made you think something would after this?"

"They shouldn't be treating you like this."

"T-they hated me before, and they'll hate me after."

Jay crossed his arms over his chest and shook his head. He had grown tired of this. The same thing happened time and time again. "You know you mean a lot to me. I'm just tired of people walking over you."

"I'm tired of you guys thinking you have to protect me."

"What do you want us to do? You said it yourself." His voice rose slightly, causing people to turn and look at them. Shay sent him a pointed look. "You said it yourself." Jay repeated. "Nothing changed after Dave and Nick. We thought John was different. We were also wrong. Hell, after that we decided we finally had enough."

"_We_?" Shay asked. "If you haven't noticed, Jay, you're the only one of our group left. Adam can't help me, Chris can't help me. A-and Jay, you have to trust me. It doesn't bother me and I'm _fine_."

"That is a load of bullshit. You can't hide behind that line forever."

"I'm not hiding." Shay asserted, massaging a temple.

"It's just... it's not fair."

"Adam was called far worse after Amy and you know that."

"Adam was..."

"What, stronger than I am? A guy?"

"I'm not saying that." His voice rose again. "Don't turn this around on me."

Shay ignored him. "Then what are you saying, Jay?"

"It's difficult."

"I'm sure it is, Jay." She said softly. The woman was always more reserved than others. She was shy and kept to those she could trust. Her body and mind had been damaged by the actions of others and both knew the other was growing tired of it. "I'm sick of it too, Jay." Shay was about to add something else when another person stopped at the table. She looked up at him and grinned, leaping to her feet and throwing her arms around the man. "Chris!"

"Shay!" He laughed, swinging her around before setting her down. "How are you holding up?

"I-I'm good. What are you doing here?"

"Gee, such an amicable welcome turns into such a..." She cut him off with a light smack. "Sorry. Fozzy's passing through, and we decided to stop for a drink."

"We just want you to stay safe." Jay stated.

"What's going on?" Chris asked, his eyebrow raised.

"J-Jay thinks I should become a recluse, because that's the only way I'll ever be safe enough for him."

Chris shrugged. "I'm fine with where you are. You're a big girl, you can handle yourself."

"Stay out of this." Jay snapped.

"Don't g-go off on him, Jay. None of this is his fault."

"He broke you and John up, didn't he?"

Silence fell between the three and Shay cleared her throat. "What is your problem, Jay?" She slid on her coat and tugged her hair from the collar. "Everything I'm doing isn't good enough."

"You're not doing anything, Shay! That's why! You're being reckless."

"I'm guessing you told him what you told me?" Chris interjected, too late to catch the pleading look in Shay's eyes. Jay looked alarmed.

"No, no she didn't. Tell me, Shay, what did you tell Chris?"

"Vince is giving me a push, I return to Smackdown next week."

"Backstage, right? There's no way in hell you're ready to wrestle."

"In-ring."

"Shay." Jay frowned. "You just got your cast off. It's too dangerous."

"Y-You've always been so demanding, Jay. So protective of me. Adam, Adam could break his neck and you wouldn't question him when he returned to the ring as soon as he said he was ready."

"Stop comparing yourself to Adam, alright? Adam was different. He got injured in the ring. You repeatedly got put in the hospital because of your horrible judgmental skills."

Shay's eye's narrowed towards her friend. "It was good to s-see you again, Chris." Shay stated as she stood up. "I'll catch up with you later." Giving the other blond a quick hug, she turned and walked away.

Shay stopped at a far end of the bar. Closing her eyes, she leaned against the counter and took in a breath. The foggy air choked her and she shook her head to clear it. Moments later, she felt a presence next to her. "I-I don't want to talk to you, Jay."

"Try again." The man chuckled. Off in the distance a glass shattered and Shay jumped. "Are you okay?"

"F-fine. I don't like shattering glass." She stumbled over her words, a constricted feeling bubbling within her. Her arms folded over her chest and she turned her head away from the man beside her. The dull roar of passersby made her head ache and her eyebrows knit together. She didn't want to be here, and she still wondered how any of her friends could persuade her to tag along. As the man put a hand on her shoulder, she winced, suddenly wishing she hadn't left Jay and Chris.

"That's understandable." He said, his eerily calm voice sent tremors down Shay's spine. Her skin prickled and a familiar unease set in. His voice was so familiar to her, yet vague and faded like a burnt memory. She remembered when he last spoke to her, and the times before that. Involuntarily, she shuddered. "You seem, bent out of shape. Do you want my jacket?" The concern in his voice shocked her, he was usually spitting obscenities at her.

She felt him shrug. "Not a big talker. You never were. It's alright, I don't mind it. You're looking good."

Shay opened her eyes, keeping them downcast and away from him. "T-thank you." She murmured, unsure if he heard her.

"I've changed." He said suddenly and Shay shook her head.

"P-People don't change." She said. "Dave didn't change, and you didn't change."

"Dave was Dave."

"And you were you." She replied softly and he gently rubbed her shoulder. Flinching, Shay hissed a breath.

"I was wrong. Things between us didn't end the way they should've." He sighed. "I'm not going to apologize—"

"I'm not going to forgive you." Shay interjected, earning a questioning look from the man beside her. She couldn't stand him near her, not this close. Her throat closed up and her skin felt clammy. She fumbled with the hem of her shirt, twisting the fabric between her hands by habit. Thoughts flickered in her head, possible outcomes of the current situation stabbing her mind. He was asking for a second chance, a philosophy she been losing faith in.

"Can you at least look at me?" He asked, the softness in his voice threw her off. Pivoting her body, Shay raised her head to look at him.

The pain came back. There was no warmth in his eyes. Slowly, he moved his hand to caress her cheek. Shay flinched and tried to turn away. "G-get away from me, Nick."

"You don't want the old days?" Nick taunted, his voice low enough so only she could hear him. With a small whimper, Shay bit her lip and shook her head. Hot tears were welling in her eyes and she quickly shut them.

"No."

"You don't want me?" A tear slipped out and rolled down her cheek.

"N-no." Her voice was quiet and quavering, and, for a second, she questioned whether she had spoken or not. "Please leave me alone."

"You know I can't do that."

"Why not? You made my life miserable. You don't want me, and I doubt you ever did. Y-you had your turn, you moved on. F-find a new verbal punching bag." Her grip tightened on the hem of her shirt as Nick dropped his hand to her waist.

"What did John do to you? You've become someone else."

Shay frowned and shook her head. She had noticed the changes, but didn't consider it a total overhaul of her former self. "No, I-I've learned to stop tolerating bullshit."

"And you got a mouth." Nick snorted. "You can't run."

"B-because you've got a hold on me. Literally." She nodded towards his hand on her waist. "Any other occasion and I'd have high-tailed it by now." His eyes found hers and she quickly averted his gaze. Her eyes fell across the room and onto John.

Nick chuckled. "He won't save you this time."

"I don't want him to." She murmured, watching him as he laughed with his friends. A couple months ago, she'd have been right beside him. It was shocking to her, how the tides had changed so quickly. The smallest actions made the biggest impacts, and the slightest misunderstandings tore down everything. Standing beside Nick was the last place she imagined herself being right now. Shay's breath caught in her throat and she turned away from Nick. As she was walking away, he grabbed her wrist and jerked her to face him.

He stared into her eyes, the coldness sending pain shooting through her. Memories clashed in her mind and she felt each verbal slap to her face. The past haunted her at the back of her mind and for a moment, she was brought back to that place. The place where being around Nick was everyday and common, where she would stand and take each and every little thing he'd say to her.

"We weren't done talking, Shay."

"Please." Her voice shook as the tears fell down her face. "Nick, please leave me alone." She pleaded, her voice barely above a whisper. Shay's shoulders shook slightly, sharp shudders that accompanied her sobs. Breaths came in short and heavy gasps and she braced herself against the nearby table.

"Is there a problem here?"

She knew that voice too. Quickly, she wiped her eyes. The last thing she wanted was for him to see her like this. Weak. Fragile. In need of saving. Inside, she was beating herself up over it, having grown tired of being a distressed damsel.

"No." Nick stated quickly and the redhead in front of them gave an unconvinced nod. Shay, eyes downcast, slipped her wrist from Nick's grasp.

"I don' believe that, Nick. She seems a bit distressed. A lil' bit o' unwanted attention."

"Mind your own business. The last time someone swooped in and saved her, she ended up in a car accident." Nick scoffed. "Don't think that saving her will get you on her good side, nobody is anymore." He shook his head. "Shay, this isn't over. You know that everyone will end up hurting you in one way or another. All it takes is time, and mistakes." Nick shoved his hands in his pockets and turned way. "It's a curse." He walked away without another word. Shay shook her head. It made sense to her.

She was cursed.


	2. Refurbished

**Hullo everyone! Here we have another chapter of A Shot In The Dark, the chapter is probably a smidgen long, but hey, it is what it is:D I only own Shay. Thank you all who reviewed or story alert/favorited this story, it means a lot to me:D Please read, review, and enjoy:D**

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><p>Shay felt another hand on her arm.<p>

Flinching, she turned and saw the man put his hands up in defense. "Sorry."

"I-It's fine. You shouldn't be apologizing."

"Are you okay?"

"F-fine. Thanks." She smiled softly, gently rubbing her wrist. What Nick had said echoed in her mind. "A-and I'm sorry for running into you earlier."

He shrugged. "Eh, it's alrigh'. I'll see you later." He smiled. "Shay, right?"

"Yes." Shay shook his hand. "And you're Sheamus."

"Righ' yeh are." Sheamus ran a hand through his hair. Silence fell between the two and Shay appreciated that there was no need to talk. Sheamus gave her space, standing across from her and a few inches away. After a few moments, Shay waved and began to walk away. The incident with Nick had zapped the energy in her and all she wanted to do was get back to the hotel and sleep. That, and she had been up since four that morning.

She was pretty sure, and quick to deny, that her recent sleeping problems stemmed from the car accident. Lately she had been getting up a lot earlier than she'd wanted, and struggling to fall asleep. Jay had bugged her to see the doctor, but she refused.

Jay.

Shay frowned and closed her eyes. He had been worried about her, Adam and Chris were the same. Jay was worried enough for the three of them, and maybe they had told him to be extra aware. She didn't want him to completely back off, she just wanted him to step down a little. He was just as stressed as she was, and following her around like a watchdog was only adding to the weight on his shoulders.

"Would yeh like to have a seat?" Sheamus asked, and her attention snapped to him.

"Huh?"

"A seat?" He gestured to a table and she shook her head.

"I-I have to go. I'm sorry. I have a... a meeting with Vince tomorrow morning." She stifled a yawn and blinked away the dots of black that spotted her vision.

"Are yeh' sure yer alrigh'?"

Shay looked up at him. "I'm just tired."

"Do yeh nee' a ride?"

"N-no, Jay was supposed to drive me." Shay looked over her shoulder and saw Jay at the table with Chris. She was certain that neither of them wanted to endure a car with each other.

"Tha' was a contradiction." He gave her a small smile. "Le' me drive yeh." He proposed as he followed her outside. The cool air hit her in the face and Shay took in a deep breath. The fog in her head lifted slightly and she yawned again. Stars littered the dark blue sky and the moon cast a glow on the parking lot. Sheamus followed close behind her and she could feel him looming over her. "Yeh never answered me."

"What?"

"Woul' yeh like me to drive yeh to the hotel?" He repeated and Shay could detect a subtle hint of concern in his posture and voice. "I can tell, yer in no condition to drive."

"I'm f-fine." She lied, losing her footing and bracing herself against a car. "S-still a klutz, but fine."

"I won' let you drive."

"And I'm sure you're going to stand here and wait, right?" Shay replied, leaning against the trunk. It was the one Jay had driven earlier, technically it was her ride. "W-what do you care, anyway?"

"Does it matter why I care?" He shot back, crossing his arms over his chest.

She paused and, choosing not to answer him, went over and pulled on a door handle. When it didn't budge, she sighed and ran a hand through her hair. Shay dug in her pockets, pulling out a silver key attached to a keychain. She tried to open the door again, but failed. Looking back at Sheamus, she cleared her throat. "C-can I still take you up on your offer?"

"The ride? Yeah." He nodded. "Tha's for the trunk." He nodded again towards the key.

"H-how do you know?"

"If I doesn't open the door, it probably opens the trunk." Her eyebrow rose as she moved back to the trunk. As he predicted, the trunk sprung open. Reaching in, she grabbed two bags and slammed it shut again. Locking it again, she turned back towards the redhead in front of her. "Ready?" When Shay nodded, he showed her to his car. "Jus' leave the bags by the trunk. I'll get 'em. Make yerself comfortable." Sheamus opened the passenger side door and waited until she got in before shutting it.

Shay rubbed her face, and rested her head on the headrest. Pulling the seat belt across her chest, she surveyed the interior. It was small, with a sleek leather upholstery. Instantly she knew it was an expensive rental. Her fingers ran along the windowsill and her eyes fell on the radio. Fleetingly, she wondered what kind of music he listened to.

The driver's side door opened and Sheamus seated himself inside. Shutting the door, he buckled himself in and turned the key in the ignition. "Sh-Sheamus?"

"Yes?"

"T-thank you."

"Any time."

For a while, they drove in silence. Shay stared out the window, watching buildings and trees melt and fade into one another as they passed. "I-I took this offer for two reasons, you know." She said softly.

"An'? Wha' were the reasons?"

"Because I didn't have another ride, and to avoid an uncomfortable silence with Jay." She informed him and he chuckled.

"I didn' think yeh were much of a talker."

"I'm not."

"Yer jus' full o' contradictions, aren' yeh?" He didn't look at her as he grinned and shook his head. "So, yeh said yeh had a meetin' tomorrow?"

"Um, yeah." Shay rested her cheek in her palm, her arm propped on the windowsill. "I r-return to Smackdown next week."

"Oh really? Great. Welcome back. It'll be good to have yeh aroun'. Will yeh miss Raw, any?"

"Loads." She murmured sarcastically. "P-probably not. I haven't been there in f-forever, and I'm ready for a change."

"What kind o' change?" He inquired and Shay shrugged. She twisted the ends of her hair between her fingers as her other hand played a nervous rhythm on her knee. The change she wanted was something she couldn't put an exact pinpoint on.

"I just want to be myself. These l-last few times I've been a valet, and I hated it. I-I hate not being able to do what I love to the fullest. J-John, John was better than the Hart Dynasty. I don't want to be connected to my family, at least n-not in the ring. I don't want to be like every Diva in the business. And I don't want to be just another Hart. I-I'm just hoping Vince will give me that this time." She didn't realize she had started to ramble and stopped talking. "S-Sorry."

"It's alrigh'. Go on."

"If I am paired with someone, I want to have good chemistry and equality. I-I'd like to feel like a teammate, not the one who leads them to the ring. I've valeted enough, and I don't want those two-minute-long matches that mean absolutely nothing. You're getting b-bored, aren't you?"

"Me?" Sheamus asked, "Nah. Not bored. What happened earlier?"

"B-between Nick and me? Or Jay?"

"Whichever yeh feel like answerin."

Shay's shoulders tensed. She had feared he would ask what the issue was between Nick and her, A thought crossed her mind on what might have happened had Sheamus not intervened. "Probably nothing." She murmured to herself.

"Wha?"

"Oh, nothing. It was nothing."

"Tha's not true. He was freakin yeh out." He sighed. "Yeh don' trust me, an' I don' blame yeh."

Shay wasn't going to lie. He was right. She didn't trust him. Trust wasn't something she gave away often. It was sacred to her, and she had grown protective of it. The man beside her was a stranger, someone she couldn't tell her secrets to. Inwardly, she scoffed. Everyone knew what happened between John and her. It wasn't something that could be kept quiet. It was partially the reason behind her move to Smackdown. Vince didn't want the two of them around one another. Jay was ecstatic when she told him this. On Smackdown, he could keep an eye on her, and she was out of the way of both Nick and John. 'Two birds, one stone.' He had said.

Doubt became second nature to her. Her trust and faith in the people around her faded until she had become secluded. A while ago she realized that people didn't want to understand her, or her situations. She didn't trust easily and she cherished the trust people had in her. John lost his trust in her and subsequently, they fell apart.

"You're right." Shay nodded. "I don't trust you. And you don't trust me either."

"I'll trust yeh when yeh trust me."

She chuckled and shook her head. "Y-you'll be waiting for quite some time."

Sheamus turned into the hotel parking lot and found a vacant spot. He pocketed his keys and strummed his fingers on the steering wheel. Shay's hand reached for the door handle. It didn't budge. Heated anxiety shuddered through her and she tried opening the door again.

"They call it a lock for a reason."

"W-Why'd you lock me in?"

"I'm locked in too."

"Yes." She nodded, an unusual feeling settling in her. Impatience. Anger. This was far from where she wanted to be. "You have the keys, though." Deciding that her constant efforts on the door weren't going to help, Shay sighed and sat back in her seat. "C-Can you please let me out?"

"Yeh'd prefer havin' Jay or Chris, wouldn't yeh? O'er me. Wha' ever did happen between yeh an' John?"

Shay let out a chortle. "You mean you haven't heard?" Sarcasm dripped from her words. "We broke up." She could've sworn she saw him roll his eyes with a smile.

"I know tha'. Why?"

"That really isn't your business, is it?" She asked, an eyebrow raised. Shay shook her head. "I-I'm sorry. I'm not this snappy all the time." The satisfied smirk that spread across his face made her want to smack him.

"Moody, tha's fine."

"I... i-it's not... I'm not moody." She said. It was true, something about the man beside her unsettled her. He was the polar opposite than what she expected. He wasn't intent on figuring her out, deciphering her like a new puzzle on the newspaper. He was quick and prodding, only backing off once the line had been crossed. To her, it was an edgier game of Twenty-Questions, most of which she had left unanswered. "Stubborn, yes. M-Moody, no."

Sheamus shook his head and ran a hand over his hairline beard. Her perception of him had completely changed since the beginning of the night. How the conversation went from the forced conversation between acquaintances to subtle hostility was beyond her. Had she known this would be the aftermath of the car ride, she'd have hailed a cab. This, however; probably paled in comparison to how the ride with Jay would've been. She could see it now, both staring out the window as a stifling silence suffocated them.

"Yeh were very... timid at the bar. Fast forward, you're snappy."

"S-something about you just, irritates me, I guess." Shay shrugged and watched as Sheamus dug around in his pockets. She couldn't deny that he was right, she had become snappy since driving with him. Something about him, something she couldn't put her finger on, annoyed her.

"Admit it, you're pissed at me."

"N-no."

"A contradiction an' a liar. I believe we've hit the jackpot, Ms. Hart."

Shay's eyebrows knit together and the unsettled feeling grew. She involuntarily twitched at being addressed by her surname. It wasn't something she was used to hearing often.

"Mr. Farrelly," she began, watching his shoulders tense. A soft smirk played at the corner of her lips, "would you please release me from the conf-confines of your vehicle?" Mentally, she cursed herself and hoped the stutter didn't matter to him. She could see frustration in his face.

"Doors are unlocked." The light-hearted coyness in his voice had dissipated. Sheamus cleared his throat and nodded towards her door. Her hand slowly clasped the handle and pulled. As he had said, the doors were unlocked. Shay stepped out and was about to shut the door when she hesitated. Peering into the vehicle, she waved.

"T-thank you, Mr. Shea—"

"Stephen." Sheamus stated. "It's Stephen."

"Alright." Shay nodded. "Thank you, Stephen." She shut the door and walked down the sidewalk. Shay sent a glance over her shoulder and saw that Stephen hadn't moved, or made a notion to leave the vehicle. Shrugging it off, she quickly made her way into the lobby. Relief flooded her and her mind buzzed. Fatigue still plagued her and she yawned. The first thing she was doing when she got into the hotel room was sleep. Or try to. It seemed that regardless of how tired she was, sleep wouldn't come.

She went down a hallway towards the elevators. The beige walls blurred by her and the impersonal paintings reminded her just how far from home she actually was. "In a few weeks we'll be in Calgary." She murmured to herself, her fingertips brushing against the wall. Had it not been for a logo change and slight color alterations, this could've been a hotel they stayed at before. They all looked the same to her now. Neutral walls, paintings of landscapes and flowers dotting the walls, plush floral carpeting beneath her feet; yeah, they were practically the same.

Moments later, she found the elevator and called for it. The metal doors slid open and she quickly got inside and pressed the button for her floor. Annoying elevator music swirled in the air and her eyes honed in on the floor-meter. She watched as it climbed, stopping every once in a while to let more people get on. They looked at her briefly before looking around. Shay paid no attention to them and when the doors opened on her floor, she wasted no time getting into the hallway.

Shay found her room and turned the door handle. "Stupid, Jay has the keys." She groaned and leant her back against the wall, sliding down to the floor. Her eyelids felt heavy and a weight was strung across her shoulders. "He shouldn't be long." She reasoned. "I'll wait for him." Shay nodded, wincing when she realized she had been talking out loud to herself. Her eyes flickered down the hall, making sure no one had heard her. She yawned again, not bothering to try and suppress it. Time seemed to slow and the sounds faded to a low buzz.

A hand shook her awake, followed by a loud whisper. "Shay." The man put a hand on her shoulder and shook it again. "Sleepy head, wake up. I'm sorry."

"Huh?" Shay sat up, eyes still clouded with sleep. She rubbed them and stretched her arms. "Jay?" Her hands went to her sides and she surveyed the scene around her. Dark green comforter bundled around her waist and across from her a TV set played the local news.

He smiled. "Hey, welcome back to the land of the living."

"Hi." She waved at him with a small laugh. "I was in the hallway last night..."

"And you fell asleep in the hallway. I found you there, slumped against the wall beside the door. Trust me, it took a lot of multitasking to open the door, carry my stuff, and carry you in here." Jay chuckled, his smile fading. "I'm sorry about last night."

"Don't worry about it." She shook her head, a fury of blond curls tumbled over her shoulders. "It's fine."

"I crossed a line."

"You're just worried, it's natural." Shay sighed and swung the comforter off of her. "What time is it?"

"Six."

"What time did you find me?"

"Eleven-thirty." Jay replied, pulling a shirt and pants out of his bag. "I know you've been having sleeping issues lately, so I didn't wake you up." Shay nodded, looking up at him. Sunlight caught on his hair, making it seem two tones brighter and blonder. His mouth opened, but she didn't hear anything.

He snapped his fingers and she startled. "S-sorry."

Jay's eyebrows rose. "You were staring."

"I was not." She stated, standing up and straightening her shirt. Her shirt, the same one she wore yesterday. Her eyes searched the floor and she groaned. "My bag."

"Your what?"  
>"My bag, I must've left it with Sheamus."<p>

"Sheamus?" He laughed. "Why would it be with him?"

"He gave me a ride last night and I left in a hurry. I was tired, I wasn't thinking." She explained, unable to hide the drone in her voice. Shay hoped Jay wouldn't argue with her over it, especially since they had just gotten over an argument. "Do you know his room number?"

Jay laughed. "314."

She stared at him questionably. "You're not mad?"

"Mad? Why would I be mad? You got here safely." He laughed again. "I'm sorry, I just think it's funny. You walking over to his room and asking for your clothes. Ah, if only I could see it. You should get going, you have a meeting at nine." Jay reminded her as he made his way to the bathroom. "I'll catch you later, Shay."

"How a-am I supposed to get there?" Shay asked, hands planted firmly on her hips. "Jay?" When he didn't respond, she rolled her eyes and left the hotel room. Standing in the hall again, she sighed and pinched her nose. The last thing she wanted to do was see Stephen again so soon. She rolled her shoulders and sighed. "Best get it over with."

How she even forgot her bags was beyond her. Shay walked down the hall, back towards the elevator. Five minutes of searching later, she found herself outside of room 314. Sucking in a breath, she went through what she was going to say in her mind. "Just ask for your damn bags, Shay." She whispered under her breath as she knocked on the door.

A faint voice called from inside, "Hold on!" She waited for a minute or so until the door opened and there stood Stephen. Shirtless. He held the door open with one hand, the other braced against the door frame. A towel was wrapped around his waist and his hair was messy. Faint annoyance glimmered in his blue eyes until he saw her. As his eyes fell on her, a smirk broadened across his face. "Yeh really gotta stop doin' things in the heat o' the moment."

"C-Can I have, um... you have my bags." She stated, mentally cursing herself for staring. Rivulets of water raced down his body, making his skin glisten beneath the light. He looked over his shoulder and nodded before turning back to her.

"That I do."

"Can I have them?" Shay asked, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. A scarlet blush blossomed on her cheeks and her hands fiddled with her shirt again. "They are m-mine." She rushed through the words, speaking faster than she normally would have.

"I assumed they were. Seein' as they have yer name on em."

"Can you stop being a-a..."

"Smartass?" He finished, a smile evident under his moustache. Stephen's eyes followed hers and his smile, if possible, got bigger. "See somethin' yeh like?"

"What?" She asked, snapping her attention back to his face. It was the second time she had been caught staring, she realized. Her mind had wandered while her gaze stayed. "No."

"So yeh jus' stare at things yeh don't like?"

She chose not to answer him and walked forward, thinking he'd drop his arm to let her pass. He didn't. Walking straight into his arm, she let out a gasp and her hand went to her chest. Shay hissed a breath and winced. "Ow." She gave her best glare at him when he chuckled. "Don't laugh."

"Yeh could'a asked."

"It hadn't occurred to me at the time." She mumbled under her breath and quickly ducked under his arm and into his room. The curtains were open and rays of sunlight hit the single bed. "C-can I come in?" Shay smiled sweetly at him as he shut the door and waved her off.

"Does anythin' occur to yeh?" He asked. Again, she didn't answer and grabbed the handle of her bag. Stephen turned to face her. "Yer jus' gonna leave?"

"I only came for my bags."

"Yeh know, you're not actin' how I remember yeh."

"What d-do you mean?" Her eyebrow rose and she sat on the edge of the bed. She was curious, how had he remembered her? They were on Raw together, but they never talked or interacted in any way. What was there to remember?

"Yeh were quiet, yeh didn' speak to anyone aside from yer group of friends. Yeh were softspoken. Now." He let our a dry laugh, "now yeh kinda, I dunno, yer jus' different. More sure of yerself, in a way." Stephen shrugged and grabbed clothing from his bag. "Need anythin' else?"

"N-no." Shay shook her head, biting back what she wanted to say. She stood and walked to the door. Her hand hesitated on the handle and she turned back. Stephen had gone into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind him. A soft sigh passed her lips and she left his room.

Two hours later, Shay found herself sitting across from Vince McMahon. He shook her hand and sat down, pushing his glasses up his nose. "So," he began and cleared his throat, "welcome back, Shay."

"T-Thank you, sir."

"Now, there are a few things I need to go over with you before you can start. For one, you're getting new music, new entrance video, new storyline, new everything." He gave her a slight reassuring smile as he rummaged through a stack of papers. "You're physically cleared, but what about mentally?"

"M-mentally, sir?" She asked. The only problem she had was stress, and slight insomnia. Those didn't really distort her actual day.

"You've been through trauma, Ms. Hart. I just want to make sure you have a clear head on your shoulders." Vince explained. "Especially with regards to your storyline."

"What about it?" Shay said, a slight wave of worry coming over her. The way he was easing into it was troubling, he always told you flat out what the issue was. In the back of her mind, she noted the door opening and shutting. Vince sent a fleeting glance to the new entrant and motioned towards the chair beside her. Shay didn't pay attention to the person, she was more focused on the contract sitting on Vince's desk.

"You're in a team."

"And? I-I have no problem with that. As long as it's a fair..."

"Don't worry about that. We have your entrance music picked out, you confirmed it earlier, correct?" He paused, allowing her to nod before he continued. "Alright, I think we covered everything. Your new storyline is a bit of everything."

"Everything?"

"Yes, there'll be romance, and you'll be going for the title, eventually, should things work out. Welcome back to Smackdown, Shay." He smiled, pushing the contract towards her as well as a pen. "Oh and before I forget, meet your tag team partner."

Shay looked up from where she was reading. He had gestured to the seat beside her and her eyebrow rose. Pivoting in her seat, she dropped the pen she was holding. She saw her tag-team partner. All six-feet six-inches of him, topped with spiky red hair and an arrogant smirk. Briefly she wondered if he had known about this beforehand. By the look on his face, he did.

"Is there a problem?" Vince inquired in his 'there better not be a problem' tone and she shook her head.

"No, sir." She replied, finishing the contract. "Do you have a problem, Mr. Farrelly?"

Stephen smiled, "No, not at all."


	3. Under the Skin

**Woohoo, I'm back with another chapter of A Shot in the Dark! Woo, sorry it took so long. There really isn't an excuse for it, but later is better than never! I only own Shay, and everyone else is trademarked by the WWE. Etc, we all know the jig. So, please ignore any grammatical errors, I don't have a beta for this story, and I felt the chapter should be up ASAP anyway. Hehehe, so please read, review, and enjoy:)**

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><p>Jay peered up and down the hall, halfheartedly whistling a tune. His eyes went down to his watch and he rolled his shoulders. It was nearly ten and Shay still hadn't come out of the meeting. From what she had told him, it wouldn't be a terribly long one. 'Smoothing out the kinks' as she had said. He had just returned from running things through with Randy.<p>

"J-Just meet me here when you're done with Randy."

He remembered her saying it, and he had followed through. "Now, come on, Shay." His half-whine passed his lips and he leaned against the opposite facing wall. Time seemed to drag on and his mind wandered. Stress was creeping in on him, sinking its teeth into his body. Adam was so worried about her, as was Chris. Briefly, the memory of a couple months ago flashed in his mind.

They were in the hospital with Shay, and Adam had just asked if Shay wanted to see John. Randy and Jay started in hesitance The blond stopped them and asked to see them in the hall. Randy and Jay followed him, and Adam shut the door behind them. His hand was loosely grasping the knob and aging lines of worry were etched into his face. For a few moments, his eyes still rested on the wall, almost as if he could see Shay through it. Slowly, his gaze dropped to the tiled floor before raising to the men in front of him.

"Randy," He began, pushing a hand through his hair. Green eyes were laced with worry as they flickered back to the door. "Guys, I'm retiring soon."

The tension that had been building in Jay's shoulders relaxed and an unamused chuckle cut through the silence between them. "We knew that," He stated. It was true, he knew Adam was on the verge of retirement. "What does that have to do with this?"

"She needs us, right now," Adam cleared his throat. "She always had the three of us," he started, directing the statement at Jay, "and now she has one. Chris is leaving, I'm leaving; we won't be able to help her when we're not here."

"Call her, shouldn't that be enough?" Randy asked, curiosity arching his brows together. "She's not five, Adam. Sometimes I think you guys forget she's not a child."

Adam seemed to ignore him. "Chris and I are worried, hell, Chris is blaming himself; we all want her safe. We'll both call," his eyes glanced at Randy, momentarily reflecting a scowl, "but someone, a couple of _people_ should watch over her. You know, be the friends she needs. It's one thing to be here, with her in the moment, and it's a completely different thing to be thousands of miles away. You guys can do something about it, we can't."

"So," Randy said with a nod, "you want us to... for lack of a better term, _guard _her?" His arms crossed over his chest and he shook his head. "Adam, you're one of my best friends."

"You are my best friend." Jay interjected, ignoring the sidewards glance Randy shot him. "She's one of my best friends; I don't know what you want me to do, Adam. I already do all of those things."

"I want you, preferably the both of you, to watch out for her. Be a little more aware. That's it. She's been through a lot already, and she just needs to know that people are there for her. Try to make sure she doesn't get hurt."

Randy was about to speak, but Adam shushed him. "I'm not asking for take-a-bullet bonds, all I'm asking for is that she has people who are civil to her. Acquaintances, friends, whatever. Please, Randy. You're not her best friend, but you don't have to do it for her. Do it for me, it's my favor I'm asking for."

Randy sighed, looking up at the ceiling and mumbled something under his breath. "I'll do what I can."

Adam nodded, finally letting his grip on the door handle go. "Thank you."

The opening and closing of another door caught Jay's attention. Looking up, he saw Shay leaving the room. She had her back to him, talking to another person. Stephen, he recognized, stood a good foot over her with a lazy smirk plastered to his face.

"Y-you're sure there isn't a problem?"

"Are yeh callin' me a liar?" Stephen questioned, eyes finding Jay. Ignoring him, Stephen looked back at Shay, awaiting her answer.

"Not at all. Just making sure."

"Yeh've been 'makin' sure' for the past five minutes. If I had a problem, yeh'd know." His answer was curt, blunt with a slightly annoyed air.

"Sorry," she sighed, "I just..."

"Seek confirmation an' reassurance?" He interjected, another coy smile working over his face.

"You could say that. I describe it as making sure I'm not a burden." Her arms crossed over her chest and Jay couldn't help but be taken aback. She was calm, collected, and nearly retaliating against him. Shay nodded after a few moments of silence.

Then she turned around. "Jay! H-how long have you been standing there?"

"Eh, couple minutes." He replied with a shrug, watching the flash of worry in her eyes. "Not very long." Jay smiled and she grinned, the tension leaving her body as she approached him. "How was your meeting?"

"Great! I have everything sorted out." The excitement flashed in her eyes and Jay could see her passion reflected in her smile. "Jay," she laughed, "I'm coming back. I'm not the wannabe anymore."

"That's great." He smiled, reaching out and fluffing her hair. It had been so long since he had seen her this... this happy, this content, this excited about something. She had found her passion again, and he could see it in the way she smiled at him, the way you see the joy in a child's eyes at Christmastime. The pride in him was almost quelled by the worry that settled in his stomach. Jay looked at her, soaking in her appearance; the sideways, nearly irritated look she shot at Stephen when he smirked at her, the smile that reached from her lips to her eyes, and he realized that this was _her_. This was the Shay he missed, the one he used to see everyday however many years back.

And it was gone in a flash.

"Hey, move this meeting _out _of the middle of the hallway."

Shay turned to face the man who spoke, the light fleeting her eyes the moment they met his. Suddenly, she was that same girl he saw a few months ago. Fear, despair, anger; it was all coming back in a tidal wave, smashing against her and taking her away to sea. Her posture crumbled, knees bending and arms folding protectively across her chest. Shay's attention flickered to the floor as she silently moved to stand by the wall. Her gaze cast over to Stephen, then to Jay, before coming back to the floor.

"Shay. I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." He passed it off with a weak smile. It fell when he realized she wasn't going to return it. "I wouldn't have been so rude had..."

"John." Jay cut him off.

"Can I talk to her?" John asked.

Jay looked from John to Shay, the denial dancing on his tongue. His eyes searched for hers, and he felt her emotion. He could see the weakness that still found her, and it sent a burst of pain into his own heart. "It's up to her." He replied and sent her a nod. She looked up for a moment and shook her head. "And that's a no."

"C'mon." John took a step forward, his arm outstretched and his fingers grazed her arm. Shay jolted, as if fire exploded from his fingertips and caught her shirt ablaze. "Shay."

She ignored him and crossed the hallway to stand beside Jay. "We had a lunch meeting." Shay said softly, fingers moving to subtly tug on his sleeve. He nodded and glanced at Stephen.

"Stephen, we were just heading out to lunch. Did you want to come?"

The redhead nodded, a confused look swarming his face as he stood on the other side of Shay and followed them as they walked down the hall, leaving John behind.

Shay looked up from her menu to the sight of two sets of eyes staring at her. "G-guys?"

"Nothing." They both said in unison, switching their gaze.

She frowned and set aside the plastic menu. Sighing, she ran a hand through her hair, letting the blond tresses fall over her shoulders. "Y-you've been giving me looks... this entire time."

"Really?" Jay asked, shrugging. "I didn't-"

"Cut it, Jay." Shay replied curtly.

"Are you sure you're okay?" The question fell past his lips in rapid succession.

Shay rolled her eyes. "Yes. I assure you I'm fine, Jay. S-stop worrying."

"Start caring." He answered, flipping a page.

"S-stop bringing this up, especially around people who have no involvement in the matter." Shay sent a sideways glance to Stephen. "It makes things awkward."

"I'm just worried." Jay stated, rubbing his face as he shook his head. "Alright?" His voice dropped to a low whisper. "I saw the way you looked at him."

"And?" Shay asked, her gaze steady on the menu. "I'm not discussing this with you right now, Jay."

"You haven't discussed it with me at all." Jay replied, tones of annoyance flickered in his eyes and he shook his head again. "Nothing. Not a single fuckin' word. You haven't said a damn thing to anybody."

"And do you r-really think I'll talk to you about it in public?" Shay asked, watching as he muttered under his breath. "E-exactly. Now isn't the time."

"There never is a time with you. You don't trust a damned soul."

"It's not about trust, Jay. It's about not wanting to be a burden. Don't you understand? I don't want to talk about it, alright? It's over, it happened, and I've moved on." She folded the menu as the waitress came by. "Double with cheese, please." The waitress went around the table, taking the other orders and soon walked away. Immediately, Shay turned her gaze back to Jay. "I think it's about time we change the subject. We-we've just about ignored our guest." She gestured to Sheamus, who gave her a crooked grin.

"I was quite content watchin' you two go at it."

"W-wouldn't want to be rude."

"Jus' like yeh bein' a burden?" He responded quickly and Shay tensed, tapping her fingers against the table top. This was the exact opposite of the lunch she had imagined. She had imagined a nice conversation with Jay. As usual, nothing went as she imagined. Stephen was also something she hadn't expected. Had it been up to her and a disregard for good manners, she would've retracted Jay's lunch offer. She barely knew the man, and yet he still found a way to get under her skin with the slightest of comments.

"Exactly." She smiled sweetly, wondering what his problem was. "I wouldn't want anyone to be... un-uncomfortable in my presence."

"Good thing yeh don' make me uncomfortable." He smirked and Shay avoided the puzzled look Jay sent her. "Unless, o' course, I make yeh uncomfortable."

"Me? No. No, sir. I don't mind your presence." She almost laughed at the slight disappointment in his eyes, as if getting under her skin was a game to him. Well, she surmised, if he wanted to play, she wouldn't hold back.

"Bein' yer partner, an' all, Vince'll wan' us to get to know each other."

"Vince just wants us to get along. He couldn't care less if we got to 'know each other'."

"Wha', he doesn't want us being friends?"

"I never said that," Shay began as their meals came, "and I have no intention of being your friend." Annoyance flickered in his eyes again, and a faint disappointment was evident as he cleared his throat. She shrugged off Jay's bewildered look as she dug into her meal. The words rolled off her tongue, and she did surprise herself. Perhaps she was a bit harsher than she would've expected from herself, but her life had been rather unexpected lately.

Throughout the meal she could feel Jay's gaze turn from her, to Stephen, to his meal, then back to repeat the schedule. "Jay," She asked, "what are you staring at?"

"Nothing. Just thinking about how awkward this lunch is."

"Well, I'm going to the park after this."

"Tha' was a bit off topic." Stephen interjected, sending Shay a crooked grin as she scowled. She felt surges of emotions she wasn't entirely used to. Annoyance, a fire burning, not passion, but something else entirely. It wasn't rage. It wasn't anger. It was something she couldn't pinpoint and it was starting to nab at her. He made her unsettled again, and all he needed was to be around her. Shay could feel the tension in her shoulders heighten. It wasn't fair, she had promised herself a long time ago she'd never let someone have that strong a hold on her so early. She didn't want him to have strength over her, to be able to pry her open like a rusty treasure chest. And the best way she knew to keep people out was to build up walls between her and them.

Rather than answering, she kept quiet and finished her meal. She paid for her meal and followed Jay and Stephen out of the restaurant. Walking between them, she could feel the worry surrounding Jay, and the arrogant aura that seemed to hover around Stephen. Glancing at her phone, she ran a hand through her hair.

"We-we have a signing in an hour."

"Yeah, I know. " Jay put a hand on her shoulder. "Well I do. You have the rest of the day to yourself." He chuckled. "Shay," Jay began as they approached his car, "you can come with me, if you'd like."

Shay shook her head and muttered a polite 'no'. "I-I'd rather have some time to myself." She smiled as Jay eyed her warily. He didn't believe her, something she didn't blame him for. Hell, if she saw herself lately, she wouldn't give her time alone. "Training. I'll train." She conjured up the words quickly, anything to reassure him that she would be fine, and he could stop eying her like a vulture on a carcass. Jay nodded and hugged her.

"Don't push yourself too hard." He still wasn't convinced, and something made her think that he'd probably never be. Not fully, at least. After all, they'd known each other for years. Their bullshit radars had become ridiculously heightened by now. And, after all they'd been through, he felt as though she needed protection. Shay nearly scoffed. Of course she needed protection. She'd been the one to cause all his worry. The aging hues in his eyes and the crinkles that lined his forehead when he frowned. Reason told her that they were caused by her actions, directly or indirectly.

"I won't. I promise." She smiled again as he got into his car.

"Hey, how are you getting back to the hotel?" Jay asked

"Wan' a ride back to the hotel?" Stephen asked. Immediately after the words left his lips, Shay frowned. Yesterday's car ride with him didn't turn out too well, and she really didn't want to repeat that. She could hear the nearly mocking tone in his voice. Smiling sweetly, she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"No thank you, Stephen. I-I think I'll walk."

He shrugged. "Alrigh'. Suit yerself." Stephen turned to face Jay, "I'll make sure she gets there safely."

"Thanks, man. I really gotta go. I'll catch you later." He gave them a slight wave as he pulled out of his space and went off down the road. Shay felt some of the tension leave her shoulders and she drew in a breath. "Are yeh gonna tell me what's goin' on between yeh two?"

"No." She answered as she began walking in the direction of the hotel. Stephen followed behind her.

"Are yeh gonna talk to me?"

"I-If you insist on asking questions, I'll answer with one-word responses, so..." She trailed off, avoiding his gaze. Shay would've been content with him just being there, and not talking. She'd rather have him minding his own business than dig himself into hers. He didn't belong there, with her.

"I can do with that." Stephen said. "You an' Jay are arguin' a lot lately."

"I don't recall that ever being your business."

"Jus' curious."

"There's a fine line between curious and nosy."

"Ha! Yeh said more than one word."

"You didn't ask a question. You made a statement." Shay replied, shivering as the cold air seeped through her jacket. Kicking a small pile of leaves away, she shut her eyes. Familiar pangs of fatigue seeped in with the air and she rolled her shoulders. Opening her eyes, she exhaled, watching her breath catch on the air.

"Why are yeh actin' like this?"

"I've been acting normally."

"No, yeh haven't. I seen yeh on Raw, yeh were never like this."

"Like what, exactly?" She spun around, words dancing in her mind.

"Fiery, upset, angry." Stephen listed, counting off on his fingers. "Should I go on?"

"I'm not angry."

"An' I'm not stupid." He countered. "Whatever happen' to yeh Shay, I understand, it probably really hurt, but that's no reason to shut yerself off from the world."

Shay shook her head, "I'm not...I'm not shutting myself off."

"You're in denial."

"So... what you're saying is that you'd rather have me timid and fragile." She replied, crossing her arms over her chest. The more he spoke, the more annoyed she became. Stephen chuckled.

"Yer always gonna be fragile here. People, they'll see yeh, an' immediately think you're fragile. An' the only reason yeh think you're fragile, is because yeh let their mindset trigger your own."

"No. I'm fragile because I'm easily shattered. S-strong people, strong people like you, they don't let things break them."

"No, strong people are the ones who keep goin', even after they're broken. You're stronger than yeh think, Ms. Hart. An' I'm weaker than yeh think I am. Physical strength can only take yeh' so far." They had continued walking, letting the conversation go on.

Shay sighed, "At least physical strength is a deterrent."

"Nah, it really isn't. People who look like me, an' I don' mean pale gingers," he paused as she let out a chuckle.

"Sorry," Shay smiled, covering her mouth. "go on."

"We can' hurt jus' as much as people who look like yeh. Appearance, physical traits, they don' matter. They really don'. I don' understand why most Americans have to think that."

"Excuse me?"

"Growin' up in Ireland, things were... different. Whether yeh were a bulky redhead, or a pretty lil' blond, it didn' matter. Yeh were who yeh were, an' that's how I try to see things."

Shay smiled, letting his message sink in before the smile fell from her face. "Growing up in Canada, well... sucked for me. I think growing up anywhere would've sucked for me. However, Ireland seems like a nice place. I admire your optimism. Your views on things are v-very different than mine. You're open to people, I'm not. You can see the good inside. I can't." She shook her head and began to wonder why she'd let this conversation go. In her head she could see where he'd be able to pry her open to reach the bitterness inside. She wouldn't let him get to that, it was something meant to be kept hidden, something he didn't need to see.

"An' why not?"

Yeah. There it was. He found the crack, and she needed to seal it before he could chisel away at it any more than he already had. "For reasons that aren't your business. Our pasts shape us, Stephen. Regardless of our upbringings, what happened in the past shapes our futures, or our potential. My past, well, " Shay took in a breath, fighting down the seesawing waves of emotion in her stomach, "it shaped me into this."

"Only because yeh let it."

"And that was my mistake. It's too late to change it now. And if you had had to go through it, you would've done the same. Your instinct is to fight. Mine is to survive, there's a difference." The words danced off her tongue, quick and sharp. "Why are we having this conversation anyway?"

He smirked, "Yeh didn' answer my questions."

There it was again. The annoyance, the urge to snap back and retaliate against him. He was digging under her skin like a thirsty little parasite.

"Did we jus' have a bondin' moment?" Stephen chuckled.

"No. We didn't even have a 'moment'." Shay answered, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her jacket. They had reached the hotel by now and were standing in the lobby. Without another word, they went into the elevators. As they ascended, Shay's gaze kept flickering over to Stephen, who had his back against the wall, whistling along with the elevator music. When he would meet her gaze, she'd snap it away from him, earning her a smirk from the redhead. Already she was kicking herself. She couldn't allow him to make her feel this way, so angry and fiery. She preferred the cold anyway.

The doors opened and she wasted no time leaving him behind. Shay stumbled once, but caught herself on the wall.

"A lil' eager, don' yeh think?"

She ignored him and continued down the hall. Reaching her room, she paused, letting her reeling mind settle. Leaning forward, she rested her forehead against the door. It felt cool against her skin, a refreshing change from the heat that seemed to surround Stephen, despite the fact they had just come from outside. Her hand rested on the door, and she took a few breaths.

"Yeh know, if yeh turn it, it'll open."

His voice. Glancing up at him, she nearly jumped. "What are you still doing here?"

"I promised your friend I'd make sure yeh got here safely. An', I'm a man of my word."

"Well," she began, looking around, "I'm here, and I'm safe. You can go now." She dismissed him, letting her gaze stray from him to the hall, hoping he'd get the message. He followed her gaze and nodded.

"You're righ'. Yeh said yeh were goin' to train?"

"You sound like you want to spend more time with me."

"Well, if yeh allow-"

"I'm not. Allowing, I mean. I'm going to train, but that's not an invitation." Shay stated, her fingers tapping a rhythm on the handle. The emotions in her were fighting each other, each desperate for their own breath of air. It was making her restless, and she needed him to leave before it spilled out now. "So, if you don't mind, I need to cut this conversation short. T-thank you for walking with me, and I appreciate the lunch."

"Alrigh'." He chuckled, a gesture that made her want to smack him. His signature smirk spread across his face and he gave a small wave. "I'll see yeh later, Shay." He turned, and she half-expected him to make another remark. When he didn't, and disappeared down the hall, she unlocked the door and slipped inside. Tearing her jacket off, she threw it haphazardly onto the table. Leaning back against the door, she slid to the floor. Her breathing grew rapid and she glanced down at her arm. Tears prickled her eyes and the emotions rose and rose in her throat. She knelt forward, resting her arms against her knees and her forehead on her forearm.

In a moment, a quick moment of desperation and frustration, she bit into her arm. And, ignoring the salty taste of her skin mixing with her tears, she screamed.


	4. Burdened

**Hello, here's another update for A Shot in the Dark:D I only own Shay. I'm sorry it's been awhile, there isn't an excuse for it. There will be a few, if not more, grammatical errors. Please bear with me. Please read, review and enjoy:D**

Kiwi

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><p>Shay watched the snow fall in big, fat flakes as she left the arena. She pulled the coat tighter around her as she shook her head. Tilting her head up, she saw the Belgian flag flapping in the chilly November air. Anger, she was sure of it, was coursing through her veins and she dug her fingers deeper into her sides. What she was angry for, she couldn't tell.<p>

"People get injured all the time," she whispered, "Jay's fine."

Regardless, the bitter feeling still rested in the pit of her stomach. Brussels had been overtaken by snow, wind whipped through the hair, tossing her curls around her face, and she sighed. Her breath vaporized on the cold air and she heard the door to the arena slam, followed by a quick set of footsteps. She remained where she was, and she had a pretty good idea who was standing behind her.

"What the hell did yeh wan' me to do?"

"Nothing."

"Then why are yeh so pissed off?" He questioned her and she shrugged.

"He's my best friend."

"An' this is my _job_. I'm not gonna let him slide. It was a pansy match, anyway. He didn't even put any effort inta it."

Okay, she'd admit that he was right, but not to his face. Jay was much better than what he showed tonight. It was a cat and mouse chase for the majority of it. Shay just hated it when her friends got hurt, but she knew that had it been by anyone else's hand, she wouldn't have been as bothered. Had the match been better, longer, more suspenseful, she wouldn't have been so angry, so bitter. But it wasn't by anybody elses hand, and it wasn't under any other circumstance. It had happened, so quickly, in a blink of an eye, and it had been done by the man behind her. "He's better than that."

"I know." He sounded exasperated. "And I'd appreciate it if yeh didn' treat me like I did it purposely."

"You followed me out here, just to tell me that?" She asked.

"Well, I didn' do it on purpose. I didn' mean to hurt the fella. Yet, yer mad at me, an' I don't know why."

Shay finally turned to face him, in all his six-foot-something, snarky glory, with her eyebrow raised. "I don't know if you did it purposely or not."

"Oh, that's pleasant. Yeh don' even trust me, how'd yeh expect us to be partners?"

"I don't _want_ to be your partner, Stephen!" It came out louder than she expected, and she shook her head again. With a hastened pace, she tried to walk past him. His hand caught her shoulder and turned her to look at him. Cobalt eyes pierced her own, and she could feel the heat radiating off of him. The words hung in the air, and she waited for him to say something. The silence was prolonged, and it began to nag at her.

She couldn't remember when, or if, she had ever been that... _rude_ to someone before. Something in the man in front of her, awakened something inside. And, she reasoned, if this was how it made her act, she didn't like it.

"I don't give a damn what yeh want. Yeh'll jus' have to put up with me. Life's unfair. _You _of all people should know that. What happened in the ring, that was an accident. Your car crash, it was an accident. It happens. Get over it. Jay'll be fine again. He'll be gone for a while, is all. Unless, of course, that's why you're so upset." A smirk spread across his face. "That's it. Yer all alone, now. No Adam. No Chris, an' now, no Jay. They've been all yeh've ever had, haven't they? What are yeh gonna do now that they're gone?" Shay's shoulders tensed, and she tried to erase the emotions that were threatening to show. She knew that he was right. They were her foundation, the very thing that kept her grounded sometimes, and they were the one thing she couldn't bear to lose. Things were better when they were around, she felt more secure knowing that one of them were close.

They were her everything, and, just now, the last bit of her everything was taken away. "T-they, mean the world to me."

"An' he'll be back again."

"I know that. Things... things are better with them around. I can keep my head."

"Maybe yeh should try living without them, find new ways to keep your pretty lil head. We're not all monsters."

Shay shrugged his hand off and went back inside. Surprisingly, he didn't follow. Shaking her head, Shay ducked into the bathroom and went to the sink and mirror. Running warm water over her hands, she felt the numbness dull as a prickling sensation came in. She studied her reflection, the face in the mirror had changed since the last time she really took a look. A long, ragged, pale purple and waxy scar traced her jawline. In the back of her mind she saw the imploding of glass, heard the skid and swerve of tires on asphalt.

Cupping her hands under the faucet, she resisted flinching as the hot water hit pooled in her hands. Shutting her eyes, she splashed her face. The water stung her cold cheeks and she rocked forward, resting her forehead against the mirror. Her hands gripped the edges of the sink, and she tried to steady her breathing. She waited for a few minutes, finding solace in the silence of the room, from being distanced from the other people. Fatigue had begun to seep in again, her body feeling heavier and numbed.

Looking back up at her reflection, she realized that the scar wasn't the only thing that had changed. Purplish blue rings shadowed her eyes, the pale teal seemed duller. It was improvement since the accident. The accident... she could barely recognize herself after the accident. Now, since a few months had passed, the shock had worn off. The bruises had faded, the gravel and glass out of her wounds and flesh, the scars replacing where stitches had once been... it was improvement. Before, she looked like she had been in a car accident. Now, she just looked tired and aged. Shay dried off her face and hands as she left the bathroom.

"Shay."

"What?" She asked, turning around. "Randy."

"Jay called me. He'll be fine."

"It's Jay," Shay stated, "of course he'll tell you he's fine. Even if he isn't."

"Kind of like you." Randy replied, and Shay sighed.

"What do you want, Randy?"

"I'm supposed to drive you to the hotel."

"OH, so... I'm now incapable of doing _anything_ by myself?" Shay said sarcastically and she crossed her arms over her chest. "I can drive, Randy."

"I know. I don't want to drive you, but I made a promise." The St. Louis native stated, moving closer to her and extending an arm. Resting it on her arm, he shook his head. "What happened to you?"

"Your best friend." She frowned, the words barely leaving her lips.

"Besides that. You got reclusive and scared after Dave, uptight and nervous after Nick...now, I don't even know how to describe it. John... I know what he did wasn't right, it wasn't smart, and I'm sorry it happened. He really did love you."

"Randy," Shay began, the tone in her voice clarifying that she didn't want to delve into this topic. She'd rather avoid it, it'd happened, and she couldn't change it, " don't go there. I know he loved me. Loved, past tense. He lost his trust in me, and it all fell apart. He's moved on, I've moved on." She followed him through the arena and into the parking garage. Involuntarily, she shivered. "Where's my stuff?"

"I already got it."

"Why are you even doing this?"

"Jay asked me to." Randy replied, opening her door and shutting it after she got inside. He went around the front, getting into his side and keying the ignition. Shay shook her head in disbelief.

"You wouldn't do this... not just because Jay asked you to. Tell me, Viper, why?"

"It doesn't really matter, in the end, does it? Why I'm giving you a ride... as long as you get where you're going, who cares how you get there, or who takes you there? Whether it be me, or anyone else. You'd still get to the same place. It doesn't matter... but I do know something."

"And what's that?"

"You trust me."

"And what would give you that idea?"

"You got in the car."

Shay scoffed. "I got in the car with Sheamus, and I don't trust him."

"You have no reason to not trust me. I haven't done anything to you."

"And you haven't exactly done anything for me, either." Shay retorted as Randy pulled out of the garage. She rested her head against the window, pinching the bridge of her nose as she yawned. Randy's gaze flickered to her. "

"When was the last time you slept?"

"Four."

"When did you wake up?"

"Seven." Shay yawned again and he shook his head. "I've been busy. I return soon, I've been training."

"Not until four in the morning."

"This job comes with a crappy sleep schedule."

"Jay's..."

"Worried. I know." She said. "I know. Is he the one that put you up to this?"

"No, it was Adam." He frowned, "When you were in the hospital, Shay, do you remember how he asked to see us in the hall? He told us...Jay and I to watch over you. And, since Jay can't do that right now...I'm stepping in."

"Uh huh...so you're babysitting me?"

"For lack of a better term." Shay shook her head and rolled her eyes. She didn't feel that she needed a babysitter, or anyone to watch over her like Jay was doing. She thought she was fine, she wanted to be fine, even though deep down, she realized she probably wasn't.

Looking over at the man beside here, she drew in a breath. She had known him since they were kids, and they never were close. They barely interacted at all, unlike the relationship he had with Ted and Cody. It was now, looking at him, that she realized she had seen him grow up. She had been to a birthday party or two of his, been inside his home...

Then why were they practically strangers. How did you grow up with someone, work with someone for years...and still say you're strangers? He wasn't doing this for her... he was doing this for Adam. He was doing this to keep his ties with Adam, this is what Adam wanted... and Randy would do his best not to let him down. Adam trusted Randy, she realized. He had to, otherwise Rated RKO would've fallen apart long before it did. And, couldn't Adam's trust be enough for her?

"You went to my birthday party once." She whispered.

"Huh?"

"And I went to yours."

"What are you going on about?"

"We grew up with each other. We're barely a year apart...why don't we know each other?" She asked, watching his expression grow confused.

"We _do_ know each other."

"Not very well. You barely know me at all."

"Just because people don't talk to each other, doesn't mean they don't observe each other, or that they don't listen. If you'd think about it, you probably know me more than you think. You're an observer, a listener, probably because you don't talk much. They're people I see everyday in the halls, that I've seen everyday in the halls, that I don't think I've ever spoken to. I try to, at least. Trust me, I try." He answered and she ran a hand through her hair. It made sense, in a way.

"Then why did you never try with me?"

He laughed, mouthing something as he shook his head, "You really expected someone to approach the daughter of Bret Hart, when she was protected by her three Musketeers? Well, pardon us. I think some of us were intimidated, some just didn't think you were worth it. You were the quiet one. Nobody disturbs the quiet one, the socially awkward one, they just ridicule them."

"Gee," She crossed her arms over her chest, "thanks."

Randy chuckled again, "Hey, you asked. And, your actions were dulled whenever your bodyguards were around. I mean, Adam wasn't bad. Chris... he was lenient enough. Jay, Jay watched you like a hawk. You couldn't tell earlier, because you knew you needed it. You were afraid, scared, you needed somebody. It killed him, any of them, when they were injured, because they didn't know who would help you. But now, you've changed, probably more than you realize. You don't need them, and they've realized it too. Adam just wanted to make sure that you had someone to be there for you, Chris practically blames himself for this, and Jay..." he trailed off, "Jay can't understand that you're not fragile. He's not used to not having to pick up the pieces."

"The pieces aren't picked up...not completely."

"Anybody can see that. This time, you're the one picking them up." Randy turned into the hotel's parking lot. "You don't need them to be yourself, Shay. If you'd open up, and not be so reclusive... you'd have a lot more friends. You're cool, smart, thoughtful."

Shay opened the door and hopped out, shutting it behind her. Randy popped the trunk and moments later, heard it slam shut. She started for the sidewalk.

"Shay!"

"Yeah?" She turned back, shivering slightly with the breeze. "Aren't you coming?"

"No. But Shay, next time, you're giving me the ride." He chuckled, and she couldn't help but smile back at him.

"Will do, Randy." Shay waved as he pulled out again and disappeared down the road. Throwing her bag onto her shoulder, she strolled into the lobby. Still tired, conflicted inside, she smiled walking into the hotel. Quickly, she found her hotel room, yearning to fall into the bed and sleep.

She should've known better. She really should've. Thinking she'd be able to fall asleep easily was futile, and wishful thinking. No, instead of a solid time of sleep, she got the screeching of tires, the shattering of glass,and the faint wail of a siren in the distance. She could feel her bones crunching and cracking, her head snapping against the wet asphalt. Her chest felt like it had been blown inward, and breath couldn't find her lungs.

Shay was shaking, the images flashing in her head like an old film. She could smell the faint alcohol on John's breath, hear his plead for her to come with him, and her stupidity to comply. The car, moving too fast and leaving the rest of the world behind, where she hadn't buckled her seat belt. It was metal twisting against metal, and it reverberated against her skull. Deep in her mind she remembered every kiss, every touch he placed on her. How something so sweet could turn sour was beyond her. How one week he was grinning, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her...and the next he crushed her like a petty insect.

Her phone sounded and she sat upright, hand grasping it and answering, "Hello?"

"Where'in the bloody hell are yeh? We have a tapin' an' yer supposed to be here."

She cursed herself, glancing at the clock. It flashed 11:00 and she swore out loud. "I-I'm so sorry." He sounded angry, and she remembered Jay telling her that he could have a temper. "How late am I?"

"Jus' a bit. Considerin' yeh shoulda been here twen'y minutes ago." He snapped and Shay flinched.

"I'm sorry."

"Quit apologizin' an' get here."

Shay sighed, quickly redressing in a suitable outfit of jeans and a t-shirt. She crudely shoved all of her things in her bag and darted out of the hotel room. The blond nearly ran down the hall and through the lobby. Her eyes darted around the parking lot. Everyone that could possibly be going to the arena had gone by now. No buses...no taxis...tears were budding in her eyes as she looked around. Her gaze fell on her shoes, and with a shaky breath, she started running down the sidewalk

She didn't keep track of time, but she ignored the calls she could hear coming from her phone. When she finally reached the arena, she bounded through the doors, barely stopping as she ran down the hall. Turning sharply, she stumbled into the makeup and hair area. Slumping down in a chair, she apologized for being so late. Her mind still in a haze, she could barely hear the rough voice reverberating down the hall.

"Where are yeh? Answer yer goddamn phone, or Ah'll come afta yeh." She heard him say as she recoiled. He didn't seem to move. Shay hunched forward, hands on her knees as she tried to regain her breath. He turned to look at her, anger nearly flashing in his eyes. "We'll, look who finally decided to show up."

"Is...is your acc-accent...always that thick when you're mad?" She asked weakly, coughing. Her lungs burned, and she felt sick.

"Did yeh run here?" Sheamus asked, sitting down to look her in the face. She felt his gaze on her, momentarily wondering if he could see her scar. Silently, knowing her words would turn to dust in her dry mouth, she nodded. He looked bemused, almost approving and she wanted to wipe the look from his face. "In jeans?"

"Sh-shu-shut up." She coughed.

"Yeh don' look too swell."

"I-I'm not."

He chuckled, "Why?"

Shay could feel her body tense. Was he being serious. Straightening up, she put her hands on the arms of the chair and stared at him. "I-I didn't get much sleep last night..." Why she didn't sleep well, she wouldn't tell him. No matter how much prodding he did, he didn't need to know about it. It was her little secret. Glancing down, she saw the bite marks on her arm, and she instantly covered it with her hand.

"Do any o' us?"

"I didn't eat this morning, and I ran all the way from the hotel to here. And your company isn't always the most...p-pleasant."

"Ah'm sorry Ah'm not yer California dream."

Shay stared at him blankly, not knowing where that statenent came from Shaking her head, she nodded towards the door. "Shouldn't you be off doing something else?"

"Prolly. I'll see you later. That is, if yeh show up." He scowled, shoving his hands in his pockets and standing. "When yeh're done, come to the locker room." Sheamus turned, walking away and leaving her there as one of the stylists started chastising her for her less-than-clean hair. As he faded from sight, her mind began whirring, wondering exactly what he meant by not being her 'California Dream'.


	5. The Return

**Why hello there! Welcome to the newest chapter of Moth to a Flame. Yeah...I kinda sorta changed the title...my bad:/ Anyhoo, I only own Shay. The song used for her entrance is The Good Life by Three Days Grace. I apologize for the grammatical errors and spelling errors. Please review, and leave me a response, constructive crit, etc. Please read, review, and enjoy.**

* * *

><p>"He really isn't a bad guy." The brunette that was attending to Shay's hair said, letting a curled lock fall against her shoulder. Shay bit her lip and sighed, playing with her hands in her lap. "Really. He can be sweet. He's just...misunderstood."<p>

"Uh-huh." Shay murmured.

"Ms. Hart, have you ever really had a conversation with him?"

"No." She replied. "He hasn't stopped being snarky enough to talk to him." Shay rested her fingers on her temple. "All he really does is ridicule me, day in and day out. It's not fair, really, it isn't."

The woman sighed, separating Shay's hair. "No, it isn't. You should still give him a chance."

"Well, I've tried. So far, he's just been rude. I'm half expecting him to make me address him as King Sheamus."

"Has he been rude, or has he just been giving you his honest opinion?" She questioned, an eyebrow rose and Shay glanced down. The lady gave the curl she was holding a gentle tug. "Hey, keep your head up so I can see what I'm doing."

"Clare."

"Yes, Ms. Hart?"

"How am I supposed to be his partner? We can barely stand each other."

"That," Clare began, "my dear, is up to you to decide. Forgive me, it's not my place to say, but maybe you need to look at yourself for this one. Maybe you need to stop waiting on things to change for you, and start changing yourself. I'm not saying be someone you're not, but... be a better you. Meet him in the middle."

Shay thought about it, "Push harder?"

"I suppose. When you're yourself, Shay, it's... different. You can be boisterous sometimes, opinionated even. You're still shy around people, but I think it's his personality too. Maybe you're more alike than you think. Think about it. How did John make you feel?"

Shay fought the urge to roll her eyes. It was a touchy subject, to her, at least. John was something that was bittersweet, like dark chocolate. She thought about it, John felt comfortable. Being with him, in his arms, was welcoming. She felt wanted, and warm. It was pleasant, she admitted. "Comfortable. I-it was comfortable." Shay answered. "I could be relaxed, not feel judged, or teased."

"But you never had relations with him, like you do Sheamus?"

"No. We wouldn't have lasted as long as we did." Shay scoffed. "Sheamus, he brings out something in me that I can't explain."

"Fire." Clare responded. "I saw your altercation. I could see it. If you two would stop butting heads, I'd expect you two to be great friends."

Shay chuckled. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, Clare." She shook her head slightly. "I don't think that'll ever happen.  
>The hairdresser sighed, letting the last curl drop. "Just, think about what I said, please?"<p>

"Alright." Shay complied, standing. She yawned and stretched, and she caught the worried gleam in Clare's eye. "I'm fine."

"If you say so, Shay." She shook her head, turning back to the table. Shay made her way back to the locker rooms, giving the occasional wave to the stagehands along the way. It had been a long time since she had been back, and just being this close was exhilarating. She took in a deep breath, remembering the smells she had almost forgotten.

Looking up, she caught herself in time to prevent a collision with Nattie. The other blond looked up, and her eyes widened. Shay could feel the tension in the air and she cleared her throat. "Nattie." She waved politely with a small smile. Things hadn't been great with her cousin, or much of her family. Nattie returned the smile, which quickly faded as she took in the woman in front of her. Shay could feel the self-consciousness grow as she felt Nattie stare at her, the scars, the tired tint to her skin, it made her skin itch.

Nattie shook her head slowly. "I-I'm sorry for staring. I'm sorry, Shay."

"For what?" She asked quietly, focusing her eyes on her cousin. "This isn't your fault."

"I didn't..." Nattie trailed off, "I was mad." She corrected herself. "I'm sorry for the downfall, Shay."

"Whatever, it's fine." Shay muttered, crossing her arms over her chest. Once upon a time, her and Nattie had been close. When she first started hanging around John, she remembered, the two started to fall apart. That was when things really started to fall apart between her and her family.

"No, it's not, Shay." Nattie sighed, putting a hand on Shay's shoulder. "Can we... can we talk sometime? There's things that need to be cleared up. I miss you, Shay."

Shay snorted, she remembered the arguments they had, and how both had gone too far. The things that were said stung, and seeing her now, Shay realized that she wasn't entirely innocent. Both had been mean. "I'm sure you do." She couldn't bite back the sarcasm in her voice.

Nattie rose an eyebrow, "Please don't tell me we're going to act like we used to."

Shay cleared her throat and ran a hand through her hair. "I don't want to, Nattie. I really don't, I just... things got so bad between us, between our family... between me and our family."

"I know," Nattie nodded, "Things got really bad, and I want a chance to fix it."

"I have some time now, before the show." Shay stated. "If you want to." Nattie smiled and nodded before walking with Shay.

"Lunch?"

"Sounds great." Shay replied as the two worked their way to catering. Shay grabbed a bagel before sitting down across from her cousin.. She slowly tore a piece off. She didn't feel like eating, her nerves were prickling down her spine and a nauseated wave tossed back and forth in her stomach. Fear settled in her mind, but she wasn't exactly sure what she was afraid of. Nothing Nattie could say could affect her, she surmised.

"Things aren't fine."

Alright, so she lied. She was afraid of what Nattie would say, or could say. Shay felt her heart pick up in pace and her hands fiddled with the bagel. When the accident, she lost contact with Nattie, as sad as it sounds. She distanced herself from everybody after the accident, family or friend. The tension between her and the woman in front of her was thick and suffocating, and it made Shay uncomfortable. However, she'd admit that it was partially her doing. 'Fighting her own battles by herself' wasn't working out too well. Shay was still left with the aftermath, and even though the debris had cleared, it was still in ruin.

Nattie looked up at Shay after a while of silence, as if waiting for Shay to respond. "You look like hell."

"Thanks." Shay replied. "Y-you wanted to talk?" She prompted and Nattie nodded, twisting her own hands in her lap.

"We fell apart, and I didn't want it to happen. You have to understand that, Shay."

"With the way you acted, that's hard to believe." Shay stated and she could see the fire build up behind Nattie's eyes. Frustration rose up and a flare sparked.

"The way _I _acted? Did you ever think that you were the one pushing us away? You're going to get mad at me for saying this, but I don't care. John was the one fueling this fire. We never had any problems until he came into the picture." Nattie replied and ran a hand through her hair.

"No, he made me realize the problems we had."

"Shay, no he didn't. Your father loves you, we all love you. We all want the best and we all give a damn. You know what I think? I think you still weren't over Dave. You weren't over what happened with Dave and you," she sighed, trying to find the best words to fit. "I don't want to upset you, Shay, but I think you should hear this," Nattie interluded, "you rushed into this thing with John and you got in way over your head. You thought you found something great, and we all did too, but he did things to you. Things you didn't notice."

Shay's gaze hardened, and she closed her eyes for a moment. She didn't want to hear this, and she wanted to snap back, retaliate, say that everything Nattie just said was a lie. The words danced on her tongue, and it took all of her to swallow them down again. "That's enough."

"No, it isn't." Nattie pressed on. "I don't know if it's because you were how you were, or what. He had such a strong impression on you."

"He brought out the best in me."

"He influenced you to think that what we were doing wasn't enough."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." Nattie stated, "He was a prince in shining armor. John was charming, strong-willed, smart...he was everything you could ever want, and more. His understanding, his 'need to know' personality made everything he did for you tower over everything we did. It made us look like the bad guy, especially in your eyes. Does that make sense?" Slowly, Shay nodded. It wasn't what she wanted to hear, but it made sense, in a way. "I'm not saying he was a bad guy. For the most part, he was pretty nice. I just wanted to make things clear. We never did anything horrendously bad to you."

"You stopped talking to me, you stopped interac-"

"What did you expect! You started treating us like we were the family from hell. We gave up. At first, we went along. Sure, we thought it'd pass, that it was just a phase. Yeah, you were the odd sheep of the family. You were odd, that was it. It didn't mean the rest of the flock didn't love you all the same." Nattie took a moment to breath and smoothed out the wrinkles in her shirt. She smiled at Shay. "Don't you understand?"

"You gave up on me... because I gave up on you." Shay said. "Things aren't going to be one-hundred percent again, not for a while at least."

"I understand that, but, do you understand what I'm trying to say?" Nattie asked, her gaze wandering to the shreds of a bagel on Shay's plate. Worry creased in her face as she tried to relax. Shay felt a tension in her shoulders, her thoughts were racing, trying to find a place for everything Nattie was telling her.

"John...I loved him, Nattie. I could be myself again."

"Honey, he brought back parts of you I hadn't seen in a while. He ignited a flare, but I don't think he brought back the fire. I saw that fire go out before, and I give the Oompa Loompa props, he ignited it again. Before Nick, you were great to be around, even if you didn't think so. You were funny, even if you were shy. After Nick, it went down. You were quieter, klutzier, you lost a bit of yourself. It was understandable, and we all felt it. Batista was the bastard who put it out completely."

She really didn't want to hear this part. Shay already knew it, from her side. Nattie wasn't the one who went through it, so why was she the one telling her about it? She felt herself falling apart with each verbal slap to the face Nick dealt, and she felt herself crumble to dust with every physical one Dave dealt.

"You were always quiet and klutzy, but it got worse."

Shay let Nattie's voice drift in and out of her mind.

"I don't think he brought back you. This person, sitting in front of me now, this is the most you've been like yourself in a while. Things got so bad that seeing you shy and quiet and stumbling ever second, stuttering almost every word...we thought that was you."

"Nattie...that was me. That was me then." Shay stated as her eyes flickered towards the clock. "I-I have to go. I have a meeting with the trainer, to make sure I am a hundred percent."

Nattie sighed, "That's another thing, are you? One hundred percent, I mean. You look so tired, Shay."

"I know. I'm just trying to get used to the schedule again. That's all." Nattie stared at her as if unconvinced, and Shay bit her lip. Through the years, she had gotten good at lying, but somehow, her closest friends and family could still see straight through her. She felt Nattie's gaze on her, coasting from her eyes to her feet as they both stood. Nattie smiled, still unconvinced. Shay could see it in the way she relaxed her posture and crossed her arms over her chest. The heavy sigh that passed Nattie's lips was filled with disbelief. She could feel it as Nattie patted her shoulder.

"I'm glad you're back, Shay. I know things won't be great again for a while, but I'm willing to wait, if you are."

Shay paused, thinking to herself. Nattie had brought up points she'd rather have gone without, but they made sense. All the same, it was too much for her head to think about now. Too much was already on her mind and she just wanted to clear it. Nattie's idea and theory came up too fast, and it sunk into her mind, a thought to be remembered later. She knew that tonight, while she struggled to fall asleep, everything Nattie said would spring up in her mind and she'd spend the rest of the night thinking it over.

_"When yer done, come to the locker room."_

Shay groaned. The last thing she wanted, or needed, was visiting Sheamus. She really needed to see the trainer anyway. With a small sigh, she walked towards the locker rooms, finding the one she wanted as soon as she could. Leaning against the wall, she lightly rapped on the door. A few moments later, it opened.

Cody smiled at her, holding the door open, "Shay, how are you?"

"Uh...hi Cody." She gave him a small nod. "I-Is Sheamus in?"

"Yeah, want me to go get him?"

"I-I guess, he told me to come over, o-once I was finished with..." She trailed off, gesturing off down the hall. "The hairdresser."

"Ah," Cody nodded, stepping out of the doorway and shutting the door behind him, "well, he's not exactly dressed right now, in fact, not very many of us are dressed right now, so you'll have to wait out here for a little while." He explained. His eyebrow rose and a playful smirk spread across his face. "Unless...you still want to come in."

Shay felt her cheeks grow hot. "No, thank you. I-I mean, the majority of you are very attractive, I just...I'm not in the mood to see any of you less clothed than you already are."

Cody chuckled, "Fair enough. The guys' locker room has missed you, though. It's been awhile since you've graced our presence. You...you're the one who tripped in the shower."

Rolling her eyes, Shay crossed her arms over her chest. Figures he'd remember that, she had hoped it'd fade into the past. Nope. She glanced down at her leg. Surprisingly, the one that got sliced in the shower was the same that got busted in the crash. "And I thought you guys would've forgotten about it."

"Us? Pfft, naw." He looked at her, almost as if studying her. He and her had never been on good terms...well, any terms. Things had changed, and they continued to change, and she wasn't sure if it would be for good, or bad. Something in Cody's eyes, the glimmer in them, seemed softer than she had seen before. Shay blinked a few times, still fighting the fatigue that implanted itself into her. Today was the last day she needed to be tired, or hazy. Her mind was swimming, and she was diving headfirst into action with a crowded mind. "We wouldn't forget a pretty face like yours."

"Or my epic faceplant into the linoleum." She added, not buying the whole 'pretty face' act. "I was in a car accident, Runnels. I-I wish everyone would just let that go, and let me get on with it. People ask me if I'm okay, I am. People flatter me, I don't need it." Shay snapped. She immediately regretted it. "I-I'm sorry, Cody. You didn't deserve that." She pinched the bridge of her nose. Cody moved in front of her, tilting to the side and back. Shay shut her eyes, feeling the ground beneath her feet sway.

"You okay?"

"Would people stop asking me that? Y-Yes, I'm okay. I'm just a little dizzy, that's all." She leaned her back against the wall, deciding that that was the best position to prevent falling. "How long will he be? I-I need to see the trainer, and we need to get practicing, and..." Shay trailed off, the dizziness ebbing in and out. She'd have to get something to eat soon, otherwise, she became horrified at the thought of it, she'd probably collapse. "W-we have a lot to cover."

"Can I say something that'll probably piss you off?"

"Uh...sure?"

"If you had gotten here on time, you would've had more time to get things done." He gave her a shrug as the door opened. Shay fought back the glare that was rising to her eyes. "Ah, Stephen, uh... here she is." Cody gestured towards Shay. "Shay, I'll see you later." He gave her a smile and a nod before returning to the locker room, and leaving her with _him._

Okay, maybe she was being a little unfair to him.

"Did Cody keep yeh entertained?"

"Depends." She cleared her throat, not moving from her spot on the wall. "What's your definition of entertained?"

"Well, I wouldn't want to keep yeh waitin', an' have yeh be bored." Sheamus gave her a smirk, and she felt the heat rising in her body again.

"You kept me waiting on purpose, didn't you?" Shay accused as Sheamus began to walk off. She followed, albeit slowly. The world still tilted a little, and she blinked a few times to make it go away. Catching up to him, she watched him out of the corner of her eye.

He chuckled, "Consider it...a lesson learned."

"What?"

"If yeh make people wait, they'll make yeh wait. Simple, really. Teaches punctuality."

"Listen," she began, "I-I'm sorry I was late this morning, alright?"

"Speakin' o' that, why were yeh late, anyway?" She looked at him, taking in his expression. Slight concern seemed to glimmer in his eyes and Shay ran a hand through her hair. She didn't want to answer him, and she wouldn't let him pry an answer from her. No, she was tired of his constant poking and prodding, and she was beginning to want to fight back.

"My alarm didn't go off." She flung the lie off the top of the pile she had in the back of her mind, and hoped it stuck. He didn't need to know the details, he didn't care. Her weakness was his ammunition, and she wouldn't feed a growing fire. "I need to go to the trainer."

"I know. I'm comin' with yeh."

"W-what? Why?"

"I jus' wanna make..." He began, but cut himself off, as if trying to correct. "I have nothin' else to do, so why not?" Shay nodded, not replying to him as they continued down the hall. She half expected him to throw questions at her, but he remained silent for the majority of it. Along the way, they stopped to pick up Shay's new gear. Sheamus led her into the trainer's area, and took a seat on a chair while she sat next to him. Shay put her gear into her back, pulling her hair over her shoulder as she did so. "Yeh excited?"

"Yeah." She smiled, her mind finally realizing that in less than a couple hours, she'd be back doing what she loved the most.

"An' yeh nervous?"

"A-A little bit." Shay nodded.

"Natural." He replied, crossing his arms over his chest and half-slouching in his seat. She looked at him, then down at her.

"You sit like such a guy." She muttered as she picked an old magazine off a table and began to thumb through it.

"Considerin' I'm a guy, I fin' that a bit comfortin'." He glanced over at her. "What'cha readin'?"

"An old magazine."

"How to make a guy fall in love with yeh? I don' think yeh have any trouble with that."

"I-I wasn't reading it. It just happened to be the page I landed on." Shay sighed with a shake of her head. "And what is that supposed to mean?"

"Huh? Nothing."

"No. You said I didn't have trouble with that. What did you mean?"

"I didn' say anythin'."

"Oh, now who's the liar?" She turned to look at him with a raised eyebrow before falling back in her seat. "Hypocrite."

"An' yer so innocent?"

"I never said I was innocent." Shay responded, shutting the magazine and tossing it back on the pile. It always ended like this, these conversations. They always wound up prodding each other. Shay snorted, she wouldn't let him win. She'd had enough of people walking over her. It was getting up there with people treating her as if she were a precious porcelain doll.

"Shay." Sheamus began and she pivoted her body to look at him. "If yeh don' wanna be my partner, I could tell Vince. It could be sorted out."

"N-no." She shook her head. "I-It's fine."

"Yes'erday..."

"I can't back out now, Sheamus. I-I'm just coming back, I have no right, or place, to question his decision." Shay replied, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. She nudged her bag with her foot. She wanted to take her gear out, feel it between her fingers, remember the thrill it gave her. A shudder passed down her spine and a rumble came from her stomach. She felt too nervous to eat.

"Ms. Hart?" Shay looked up at the mention of her name, and saw the trainer standing with a clipboard. "We actually only have a few questions for you, so could you come on back?" Shay nodded, getting up and tossing her bag over her shoulder. "Is your friend coming with? It's alright if he does."

Sheamus stood and followed, and Shay sighed.

"You don't have to come." She muttered.

"I wanna know how me partner's doin'." He replied as they were led to a back room. Shay sat up on the bed, while Sheamus took a seat on a nearby chair. This didn't make since to her, his sudden appearance beside her. She hadn't expected him to stay.

"Alright. Any dizziness, feeling faint, anything?"

"N-no."

He asked her more questions, to which she responded honestly. It went by in a blur, and before she knew it, she was back by the locker rooms. "Sh-Sheamus?"

"Yeah?"

"Earlier...what did you mean by 'California Dream'?"

Sheamus laughed and shook his head, "Don' worry about it. Yeh have a match to worry about. Wouldn' wanna distract yeh." He gestured towards her bag and checked his watch. "Speakin' o' which, yeh should start getting' ready. Show starts soon."

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what you meant." Curiosity had gotten a hold of her and wasn't going to let go anytime soon. Sheamus frowned, discontent swam in his eyes and she crossed her arms over her chest. She wanted to know, it involved her, didn't that give her the right?

"Yeh'll be waitin' there for quite some time then." He replied. "It was a slip o' the tongue, that's all. Now, run along. I don' want yeh to be late." Something had changed, she realized. Something in his demeanor, his attitude had shifted. When he first talked to her in the bar and now. They seemed like two different people. Something had happened to make him act this way, she thought. The man in front of her paused, as if waiting for her to respond. When she didn't, he turned and opened the door.

He stopped and looked over his shoulder. Shay expected another banter, one of his quick analysis of her. "Good luck on yer match, Shay."

Shay nodded, muttering a thank you as he shut the door. Briefly, she wondered if he heard it. Sighing, she quickly moved towards the women's locker room. She got dressed quickly, feeling the nerves prickle her skin. _This was it_. She reminded herself as she tried to stop the thoughts racing in her head. Her mind counted out the possibilities, the probability of a failure, the anticipation of a success. Her body felt restless, and she fidgeted in her spot on the bench.

She noticed her reflection in a nearby mirror, and she stood to get a better look. Her new outfit fit snugly around her body. Silver, how befitting, she though as she studied it. It was a silver halter top that ended just below her bust, with a small oval cut out of the upper chest area. A strip of teal decorated the hems and edges. The bottoms were long, and tucked into her boots, that came to just below her knees.

Inhaling a breath, she stretched her arms and legs. Smackdown played on a monitor set up in the corner, and she was counting down the minutes until her cue came on. Standing, she cleared her throat and left the locker room. A couple people, primarily stagehands, stopped her to wish her good luck before sending her on her way. Excitement, anxiety, a burning feeling rose in her. Adrenaline was coursing through her veins as she got closer to the gorilla. She stood there, watching the monitors, waiting for the moment.

A stagehand ushered her to the curtain and gave her a pat on the back. Her opponent, Tamina, stood beside her.

"Good luck."

"T-thank you." She smiled, giving Tamina a nod. "You too."

"It's still competition. I'm not going easy out there."

"I know." Shay nodded as Tamina rolled her shoulders. This was it, she was feeling a sense of home, of being where she belonged. Tamina's music struck and the second-generation Diva was soon gone, walking out to the ring. What was once months faded into weeks, and then days, then hours, was now only seconds. Her mind cleared the instant her music hit. She was focused, prepared, and ready for this.

_"The good life is what I need. Too many people stepping over me. The only thing that's been on my mind. The one thing I need before I die..."_

**"Her opponent, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada...SHAY!"**

Every worry left her mind, her mind focusing on the ring. She fed off the reactions, the atmosphere. And just like that, she was back.


	6. Secrets Kept Inside

**Here we go, another chapter of Moth to a Flame! :D I only own Shay and Cori. Don't be afraid to give me some feedback, read, review, and enjoy, etc. :) Thank you all who have read and/or reviewed so far, and I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors, for I have no beta for this story. If you want to beta, let me know and we'll see if we can work something out. :)**

Kiwi

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><p>The first thing Shay felt was the clothesline Tamina threw at her, and the smack of the canvas against her back. Tamina's hand gripped her hair and pulled her to a stand. Shay wasn't going to give up, she had worked to hard to succumb to the recent Diva status. She wasn't going to last a meager two minutes when she knew she could go farther, hit harder, and hold her own. Tamina threw Shay over her shoulder and slammed her back down onto the mat. Tamina hooked a leg and the ref's hand hit the match.<p>

_1..._

She kicked out and grabbed the ropes to get to her feet. Tamina threw Shay into an Irish Whip, which Shay countered. The blonde built momentum as the match went on. Tamina came at Shay, and Shay stopped her with a kick to the stomach. As Tamina doubled over, Shay grabbed her and tucked the brunette under her arm, swooped her up and slammed her down before going in for the cover.

_1...2...3!_

The bell rung again and Shay stood, shoving Tamina away as the ref raised her hand. She felt herself sway, and the nausea returned. She could hear the roar of the crowd, the thundering of applause and cheers. Grabbing a mic, she grinned and ran a hand through her hair.

"WWE Universe!" Shay paused, letting the crowd cheer. This was the atmosphere that eased her mind. Being there, in the ring, cleared her thoughts. Out of everything, everywhere she had been lately, the ring felt the safest. "Guess who's back." She gestured to herself and bowed. "I decided it's been long enough since you guys saw me. A couple of years ago, I made a change. Now, it's time for another one." Clearing her throat, she dropped the mic before ducking between the ropes. Walking back up the ramp, she raised her hand in the air and waved.

Returning backstage, she wasted no time in going back to the locker room, changing, and making a beeline towards catering. The match had drained what little remaining energy she had, and, in a quick walk-through, she grabbed a bagel. She ate while she walked, carrying her bag in her free hand. Turning a corner, she saw Sheamus, his back turned towards her. Shay was about to say something, but he was speaking to someone else. Retreating, she waited just around the corner.

"Why do yeh keep callin' me?" He sounded distraught, and angered. "Ah though' Ah told yeh..." He walked back and forth, tearing a hand through his hair. "No. Absolutely not. After wha' yeh did, yeh expect me to wan' yeh back?" Sheamus snorted, and Shay peeked around the corner.

He was dressed in street clothes, his hair mussed, and he was speaking into a cell phone. Shay flinched as he turned towards her, and went back into hiding. He didn't seem to notice, having been engrossed in the conversation.

"Listen. Ah'm done. Alrigh'? Yeh can' fix this, he can't fix this. None of yeh can, so stop callin'. I don' wan' anythin' to do with either of yeh." Sheamus ended the call, spun around and slammed his fist into a nearby door. Shay yelped, startled at the sudden crash. She covered her mouth with her hand and turned the corner. He didn't turn around. There wasn't any plausible way he didn't hear her. She could hear his breathing, the deep, angry breaths he took as he uncurled his fingers. "Yeh were eavesdroppin'."

It wasn't a question. He knew she was there, and she was guilty of charge. "I-I'm...I'm sorry." Shay said under her breath. "A-Are you okay?"

He laughed, turning slowly to face her "Okay? Yeah. Why'd yeh think otherwise." She stepped closer to him until she stood right in front of him. His eyes flickered away from hers.

"Who was that on the phone?"

Again, he laughed and shook his head. "Yeh always ask questions, an' yeh refuse to answer any."

"And you tend to avoid subjects you don't want to talk about too, so don't act like you're better than I am. It's really getting old." Shay stated and he looked down at her. She could see the anger in his eyes, the swirling of a past she didn't understand. Why he was doing this to her was beyond her. Why he chose to pick his fights with her was bewildering. She hadn't done anything to him, not that she could remember. He was just brashly curious about things she didn't want to talk about, and why he couldn't accept her refusal frustrated her. "So, why don't you tell me what's going on. You seem upset."

"Oh, so now yeh wanna talk about things? Wha' I saved yeh from Nick an' yeh didn' tell me about that. Yer keepin' the John thing under wraps, yer so full o' secrets an' yeh can't stand when people keep them from yeh, can yeh?"

"You have no idea what went on between John and I." She countered. "And besides, why does it matter so much?" Shay could hear her voice rise as she followed him out of the arena. "Why do you want to know so much about me?"

"Yeh intri-"

"Don't you dare say I intrigue you." She cautioned, walking ahead of him and spinning to face him. Her foot got caught on a patch of ice and she slid. He caught her, holding her against his chest as he tried to steady himself. "Don't. Just...don't." Shay finished. Memories flashed in her head. The day she met John, actually met him came back to her. He defended her from Nick, walked with her, talked with her...all because something she did caught his eye. It was the start of the end. "P-please let me go."

"Are yeh alrigh'?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just bad memories." Shay shook her head as she stood up straight. This...partnership wouldn't work if they stayed like this. Constantly butting heads and being strangers. "I have a lot of them."

"Ah gathered tha', oddly enough." He smiled at her and she shook her head again.

"You are the biggest smartass I've ever met." She muttered.

"This partnership...it'll never work out, if we act like this." Sheamus stated as the two started walking again. "Jus'...tell me somethin' about yerself."

Shay snorted, "What's there to tell?" They reached Sheamus's car, and Shay waited for him to unlock the doors before she threw her bag in the back. As Sheamus moved towards the driver's seat, she ran around the car. Again, her foot caught a patch of ice and she slid to the ground, landing hard on the asphalt. "Jesus." She muttered.

"Didn' I say something' a while ago about the hea' o' the momen'?" Sheamus asked, leaning against the car. "Now, tell me why yeh ran over here."

"I'm driving."

His rumbling laugh triggered a roll of her eyes. "No, you're not."

"The last time you drove, you locked me in the car." Shay reasoned, raising herself onto her hands. "And that's not happening again." She felt the heat rise in her cheeks. This was her second wipeout in an hour, both of which happened in front of him, who just happened to have a habit of ridiculing her. Brushing a lock of hair out of her face, she looked up at him and was surprised to see a hand extended. Taking it, Shay let him pull her to her feet. She cleared her throat. "P-please don't mention that to anyone."

"Wha'? Yer wipeout? Nah," He shook his head and dug around in his pocket. He pulled out a set of keys and rattled them. "So, yer drivin', or what?" Shay rose an eyebrow.

"Seriously?"

"Yes." He put them in her hand and patted her shoulder. "Hurry, before I change my mind." He walked over to the passenger seat while Shay took the driver's. They drove in silence for a while Sheamus stared out the window, occasionally glancing at Shay as he rested his head on his hand. "Hawk."

"I-I beg your pardon?"

"Shay, it means hawk. Irish origins." He explained as he fiddled with his phone. The screen flashed and he scowled.

"W-what is it?"

"Don't worry about it. Remember, we're going to the airport. Ah'm not sure if Ah told yeh, but tha' was a good match." Sheamus stated.

"That was a random statement, but thank you." She smiled, pulling into the airport parking lot. They exited the car and quickly made their way inside. Shay quickly went through baggage and security and took a seat. As soon as she got onto the plan, she promised herself, she'd fall asleep. She felt a presence next to her, and she scoffed. "Don't you have friends?"

"Eh, but bein' away for two years makes things a little rusty." The slick, light English accent caught Shay's attention and her head snapped to the side. Beside her sat a brunette calmly reading a book. She looked different than Shay remembered, even though it had been years. Something was different.

Hell, everything seemed different to Shay since she came back. She surveyed the younger woman, studying to find any resemblance to the woman she knew two years ago. The abnormal hair coloring was gone, something that had always been her trademark. "C-Cori?"

"You sound like you've seen a ghost." Cori chuckled, eyes not straying from the book.

"I-Is Shane here?" She questioned, wondering where the North Carolinian was. The man had always been attached to Cori's hip, from what she remembered.

Cori snorted, "Boy Wonder? Nope."

"W-why not?" She mentally cursed the stutter. Her sense of self had been hijacked lately, it seemed. She was quiet, at a loss for words around people she knew for years and borderline obnoxious to someone she couldn't stand. A year ago, the roles would've been reversed. Right now, she should be enveloping the Brit in a hug, welcoming her from wherever she came from. But no, they kept their places and were talking like acquaintances. Two years was a long time, she reasoned. Both had changed, she was certain of it, and she was almost afraid to see just how much time had changed.

"We broke up." Shay sat back in her seat, astonished. Cori and Shane had always seemed so...strong, stable. They'd be the last people she expected to break up. Then again, she had thought the same of John and herself.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it's alright. What about you and John?"

"Same." Shay shrugged as she ran a hand through her hair. Cori replied with the same apology Shay had. "We should catch up sometime."

"That'd be nice." Cori stated as she stood. "Come on, the plane's boarding."

"Wait." Shay stood and put a hand on Cori's shoulder. "You're returning?"

"Of course, two years has been long enough, don't you think?" Cori closed her book and turned to look at Shay. She startled, "God, Shay." A hand went to her mouth as she realized her alarm. "Dammit, I-I am so sorry, Shay. I didn't mean to...that was rude." Cori fumbled for words as she bit her lip. Shay shook her head.

"It's fine." She had gotten used to the stares long ago, and was fine with it. It didn't bother her anymore.

Cori didn't reply and moved towards the gate to the plane. Shay followed close behind, relishing in the fact that Cori hadn't asked why John and her had split, or why she had scars marring her skin. She was surprised though, that Cori didn't know about it. She would've thought that Jay had told her, or she'd figure it out somehow. Vince had fabricated a story to cover up the crash, the real extent. No, one of his Divas wasn't injured in a drunk driving accident at the hands of one of his top employees. _That_ was preposterous. It was much more likely that the car had simply slid out of control. Superstars drunk driving, yeah TMZ would cover it and everything's done. Put someone's life in jeopardy, and it never even happened.

So now she walked through a sea of people who either knew what had happened and tried to keep it under wraps, or were genuinely completely clueless over the situation. Boarding the plane, she quickly found her seat. She was in the middle seat of the three-seat isle. Looking across the isle, she saw Sheamus with Wade and Justin. A smile spread across her face, she had been freed of the redhead. She could enjoy her plane ride in silence. Pulling out her iPod, she plugged herself in. Shay was lost in a song as someone shuffled past her to sit by the window, and another person sat next to her.

She turned to greet the person on her left. "He..." Her words died on her lips and she could feel her throat constricting. In the back of her mind she heard Adam and Jay, pleading for her to be alright. She could her _him_ begging her that it was all a mistake, that he hadn't meant to detonate the world beneath her feat.

"Shay," he smiled, "how are you?"

Shay shook her head slowly, and turned to face the person on her right, hoping it'd be someone tolerable. The curly head of platinum hair confirmed her worse fears. Leaning forward, she put her head in her hands. This had to be a nightmare. There wasn't any way she was stuck between Nick and John, it was unlikely. She shut her eyes and tried to calm her thoughts. She still hadn't answered him. Straightening up, she cleared her throat "I'm fine."

"You look rattled." John replied and she fought the urge to smack him upside the head and tell him off.

"I've had a rough year." Shay stated, fiddling with the hem of her shirt. She peeked around Nick's head, Sheamus was talking with Wade about something, completely oblivious to her. At this point, she'd rather be with him, than sandwiched between these two. The tension was deafening, and she stood, peering around for an escape route. She scanned for an empty seat, a friend who would trade with her, anything. Mike sat a couple rows behind her, Ron beside him. Everything else was the face of a stranger, someone who hadn't been on her side before.

"Miss." Her attention snapped to the stewardess. "You need to sit down."

"S-sorry." She slid down and pulled the seat belt across her waist.

Nick snorted, "Well, isn't that ironic. I thought you'd forgotten how to use them. Scarface. Told you you were cursed." A few minutes later, the plane slid into the air.

John's hand landed on her wrist and she jumped. "Sorry." He muttered, releasing his hand. "Shay, we need to talk." She couldn't handle this. Being between them, so close to both of them, was starting to overwhelm her. Her heart thudded against her ribcage, and she wanted to flee. Flee and scurry into the woods like a frightened rabbit.

After a while of her not responding, he continued. "I made a mistake. I was stupid, and jealous. There's no real way to say this, but, you said maybe."

"W-what?" Shay asked.

"In the hospital, I asked if we had a future, and you said maybe. I think you should know that that's not going to happen." He put his hand over hers. It didn't feel right anymore. He was consoling her, as if this realization was a great misfortune to her. She didn't think she was going to give him a second chance in the first place. Somehow, he reasoned that that tidbit of information would upset her. The only thing that was upsetting her was how close the both of them were.

His touch, which used to send sparks down her spine, was just skin now.

"I know, I shouldn't have done what I did." John reached into his pocket, drawing out a small envelope. He handed it to her. "Take a look at this, and consider it." He reached out, twirling a curl of her hair around his finger, "I'm so sorry." John was apologizing, and she failed to see why. That simple word hung limply in the air, void of any real meaning. It was empty, even if he really did meant it. Sorry wasn't going to undo anything. "You're so beautiful, Shay. And I still love you, and I've accepted that it's over."

Shay was fighting, swallowing back the urge to beg him to stop. Tears were collecting behind her eyes. As she blinked, one rolled a path down her cheek. Wiping it away, she shut her eyes and leaned back. Opening her eyes again, she sent a glance towards Sheamus. He was looking at her this time. Their eyes connected for a moment, and she saw the flashing in his eyes. Her body was taut with tension. She could've gone without him saying that.

The plane shuddered to a halt as it landed, and Shay sprung out of her seat. As soon as she was allowed, she fled out of the plane. A few minutes later, she pulled out her phone and dialed a number.

"C-Chris!" She said as the man picked up.

"Shay, it's good to hear from you."

"Same here," she smiled, even though a tear was slipping down her cheek. Shay couldn't stop fidgeting, as if ants were crawling over her skin. "I-It's been awhile since I've called. Happy Brithday. I'm sorry I couldn't call earlier. Did you get my gift?"

"Slow down, Speed Racer." Chris chuckled, "Yeah, I got your gift. Thank you, by the way. Are you okay, you sound upset."

She knew better than to lie to him, "I'll be fine."

"Shay." It was a one-worded answer, filled with the exasperated tone he used, more often than not, when something was going on with her. "What happened?"

She hadn't completely broke down yet, and she knew if she told him, she would. It was something she didn't want to do, she didn't want to let her weakness show. "Nothing. I'm just tired, that's all." It was a partial truth. Shay was tired, her hopes of sleeping on the plane had been crushed, and she was barely had any food in her. She was weak, physically and mentally.

"Uh-huh." He didn't believe her, but he wasn't going to press anything, not now anyway. That was where he differed from Adam and Jay. Shay tugged a hand through her hair. "Shay, I have to go, okay? But, I'll call you back."

"Yeah, it's okay."

"But, Shay? Take care of yourself, alright?"

Shay nodded, even though he couldn't see her. "I will, Chris. Bye, Chris." She slipped her phone into her pocket and cleared her throat. A hand landed on her shoulder and she yelped. Turning, she came face to face with Cody. "C-Cody. You scared me."

"Sorry," he smiled at her. As he looked her over, he frowned, "Are you okay? I mean, I saw you on the plane, and you looked pretty freaked out. You could've sat by Heath and I. We wouldn't have minded. Are you okay?" He repeated his first question.

"Yeah. Why do you ask?"

"You're shaking." She looked down at her hand, fingers trembling around the strap of her bag.

"Yeah, I-I'm fine." Shay lied. She wasn't sure if she was okay or not. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sheamus waiting by the doors. John passed him, and Sheamus followed him out the door. Returning her attention to Cody, she smiled. "Thank you for asking."

"It's no problem." He smiled back at her. "And, if you need anything, a ride, food, to talk, don't be afraid to ask."

Shay nodded, briefly wondering if Randy talked him into this. Cody sounded genuine, and she wasn't sure why she believed him, but she did.


	7. Rumors

**Woohoo! Another chapter of Moth to a Flame! I only own Shay, and Cori. I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors. We have some drama starting to brew in this chappy! So, please read, review, and enjoy. I love hearing/reading your feedback, and will take any constructive crit.:)**

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><p>"I was never the popular kid in school." Shay chuckled, shaking her head. "You know how it is. They call you things, horrible things, and you get stuck sometimes. There's the mindset that you'll only be everything they say you are, then there's the reality that you have two choices. You can succumb to that mindset, or you can be yourself, and prove them wrong. I was a shy kid, and klutzy. A-and I still am, sometimes. Stutterbug, that was a favorite. I was tripped in the halls, pushed around and made fun of because I spoke differently than others, I liked different things; I didn't fit their mold of 'normal'." She smiled, "And it was hard, bullies are terrible. They hate you because you're different, because you're not up to their standards. The only standards you have to live up to are the ones you set up for yourself." She looked out at the camera, to the side stood Sheamus, Punk, Cena, Eve, a few other people standing by. She had been the last to go, to cut her part in this broadcast. It was a chance she jumped at the moment it was presented to her. "You are beautiful, strong, and you can get through it. Just be yourself, and don't let them change you. Don't be a bully, be a star."<p>

Shay paused and dragged a hand through her hair. "S-sorry, I rambled a lot. Um, yo-you can cut some of it out, it's fine." She stepped out of the way, and was halfway down the hall when Eve tapped her shoulder.

"Hey, a few of us were going to go for some food, do you want to come along?"

Shay's eyebrow rose, and she peered over Eve's shoulder. "I-I'm...um, I don't really know any of you guys." She stated meekly.

"So?" Eve chuckled, patting Shay's shoulder. "All the more reason to go. C'mon, it'll be fun." She looked doubtfully at the brunette, then back to the waiting group of wrestlers.

"Fine." She responded, and followed the group outside and to the SUV.

Ten minutes later, she sat across from Sheamus at the restaurant attached to the hotel. He was fiddling with his napkin. Taking out a pen, he scrawled something on it before sliding it across to her.

**What happened on the plane?**

She bit her lip. A few weeks had passed since the plane, since she was sandwiched between John and Nick. He hadn't asked her about it until now, but she could tell he had been itching to.

**Nothing**, she wrote back and turned her attention at the mention of her name. "Yes?"

"I was just wondering how you've been." Mike smiled. "It's been awhile since we've talked."

"Oh, I've been good." Shay replied. "Things have...improved, since I was last here."

"Really?" John asked, and she nodded.

"Yeah, ever since Dave and Michelle left, things got a bit better."

"Stutterbug?" Punk asked, "Damn, that must've sucked."

"You've called me that before." She said quietly, focusing her attention elsewhere.

"Yeah," Punk frowned, "I, uh, I'm sorry. It wasn't right. Sorry doesn't exactly cut it though." He trailed off. "I don't really know you, and it was unfair."

"Punk," she sighed, "it's fine." Shay looked back down at the napkin.

**Bullshit. You looked scared**

"Are you two writing love notes?" Mike laughed and Sheamus shook his head.

"Nah, I jus' needed to talk to her abou' somethin'." He smiled, as she replied and slid the napkin back over to him. Eve pivoted to face Shay.

"You were ridiculed, and it doesn't bother you?" Eve asked, and Shay nodded.

"I just got so used to it, it didn't bother me anymore. Well, that's kinda a lie. Yeah, I got used to it, and it stopped bugging me so much. I was taught my place a while ago, and I thought to myself the same thing I said today. There are people out there, horrible people who show you just how bad people can actually be. I just figured, 'why bother with them', why bother trying to fix it? I took it, day in and day out. And I have no idea why any of you...some of you treated me that way." Shay shrugged, twirling her straw in her drink.

"If you don't mind my asking, why did you and Morrison break up? I mean, every time I saw him, he was with you." Cena asked, and Shay froze.

Yeah. That was one reason why she didn't want to come. From across the table, Sheamus was giving her a look.

"W-well, it's complicated." She looked at Mike, hoping he'd speak up. He was just as curious as everyone else. They had set a trap, and she had fallen inside it. "What did you guys hear? Surely, there was a rumor, otherwise, you wouldn't be asking."

"I heard you cheated on him." Punk said flatly, arms crossed over his chest.

"W-what?" Her voice nearly came out as a squeal. Shay frowned, twiddling her thumbs in her lap. The look Sheamus gave her hardened, as if the traces of a glare. She looked back at the napkin.

**That true? **

Her breath escaped her throat in quick, short gasps and she could feel the eyes on her, each one searching for the truth. She couldn't escape this one, no matter how hard she tried. If she told the truth, would they believe her? Could they believe that John had been the one to tear it all down? Where had Punk gotten that lie, and was it spreading faster than she knew? Questions, scenarios, all flashed in her her head. They were all looking at her for a confirmation, or denial.

"Well?" Punk prompted and John put a hand on his arm.

"Punk, maybe we shouldn't push this"

"It's been months, she can fess up to it."

Shay replied quietly, "Wh-who told you that?"

"Dolph." Punk replied, and Shay's shoulders tensed.

"Don't believe a word Dolph tells you." Eve snorted, returning her gaze to Shay. "You alright?"

"Fine." She frowned and coughed. He was trying to ruin her again. The room felt stuffy, and the walls felt like they were closing in on her, suffocating her lungs. Her lungs screamed for air, and she could feel their eyes on her, studying her. She never should've come, she should've just stayed behind. Life was easier when she stayed in the shadows. In the shadows, nobody asked questions, nobody pried and dug themselves in your business. "I-I...I have to go." Shay stammered standing up and pushing her chair in. She couldn't control the shaking in her voice. "T-thank you, I-I just...I need to go." She rushed her words, trying to avoid more prying.

"Shay, you can stay, it's fine. We'll drop the subject." Mike stated.

"It's fine. I don't really feel well anyway." Shay shot him a weak smile, one she knew fell flat. He wasn't convinced, and she realized she probably wasn't fooling any of them. Nodding, she gave a small wave and left the room, hoping to find comfort in the hotel room. She half-expected Sheamus to follow her, and she was surprised when she got to the room without him tailing her.

Shay entered the room She needed time to get her thoughts together, to collect herself before Sheamus returned. Vince had told her she had to room with him, to build for their storyline. It wasn't something she was looking forward to. Sitting on the bed closest to the balcony, she grabbed a book from her bag and opened to the marked page.

Some time later, she set the book aside. Her mind was too cluttered to focus on the words. The envelope John gave her lay on the table. She hadn't opened it yet, she was afraid of what was inside it.

John.

John was gone. He had left the WWE the other week, there wasn't any way he could bother her anymore. She cleared her throat and thought it over. She was mad at John, she resented the actions he took and how things played out. She was angrier at herself, how her nightmares kept her up at night, how her mind played tricks on her, and how she couldn't trust people easily. Shay stood and went into the bathroom. Stripping, she turned on the water and looked back into the mirror. Running her fingers along the scars on her chest, a tear slipped from her eye. He had done this to her, he provided the emotional and physical scars. It was a twisted combo of Dave and Nick, and she had let him in. She let him in, and he destroyed her.

Shay cranked the heat in the shower, and felt the hot water sting her back. She couldn't block out the images that always spun in her mind. The dirty, questioning look Sheamus shot her as she left, the scars that were physical reminders of every hurdle she had to jump, everything just reverberated in her mind, and she just wanted it to stop.

The water turned cold, and she shut off the flow. Redressing, she dragged a brush through her hair and rubbed her face. A bed was waiting for her, and she wasn't going to waste anymore time in getting to it. Stepping back into the main room, she turned towards the bed.

"Jesus." She yelped, her hand flying to her chest. Shay coughed, and straightened up as she went towards the man on the bed "Stephen."

He ignored her, and her eyebrows knit together. He was flipping his phone around in his hands. Looking at her, he stood abruptly, knocking her book from the table. His eyes flickered down at his phone, then to her. She could see the anger in his eyes, the underlying traces of pain. She remembered it, that distinct shade of pain. She saw it every time she looked in the mirror. He was hurting, he was in pain, and she realized that. She wasn't angry at him at all.

"St-Stephen?"

"Did yeh do it?" He asked gruffly, and she knew exactly what he was getting at,

"Cheat on John? No. Did you honestly believe what Dolph said?"

"Not entirely. I needed to know, though. I couldn't work with a cheater."

She scoffed, "Really? You would make that big of a deal out of a cheater? To-to the point where you wouldn't even _work_ with one? Don't worry. I didn't cheat on John. I-I couldn't have done it. I loved him, he was the one that screwed up."

"Whatever it was, get over it." Stephen turned back towards the bed and was almost there when Shay put a hand on his shoulder.

"Listen. You have no idea what happened."

"Yer right. Yeh won' tell me a damn thing."

She crossed her arms over her chest, "Do you really expect me to tell you anything when you just demand it? It doesn't work that way, and I'm sick of you trying to pry answers out of me. Stop being such a prick." Shay stated. "I don't want to talk about it with you, and if you keep acting that way, I probably never will. H-how would you feel if I told you to get over whatever's crawled up your ass lately?" Shay put her hands on her hips and looked him over. His posture changed at her reaction, and he sighed.

"Nothin's craw-"

"Would it make you feel better if I told you I'm not alright? To get over that lie? You're not alright, okay? I know."

"How?"

"Because you have the same eyes I used to see every day in the mirror when I was with Nick and Dave." She cried and cursed herself, she hadn't meant to keep that last part on there. "You're afraid, you're scared, and you're angry. And I don't think it's me you're angry at." Shay reached out again to touch his shoulder, and he shook his head. "You know why? Because I'm not angry at you. I just think you've been an asshole lately."

"Ye have no idea wha' I've been through lately." Stephen's words came out slowly.

"Just like you have no idea what I've been through, at all." Shay said, and he was about to respond when his phone rang again.

"Yeah?" As the other person spoke, she watched his eyes darken. "Hey, man, it's been awhile." Stephen laughed, and she could hear how fake it sounded. "Yeah, yeah, I got it. I'll see if I can fit it in. Busy schedule, ye know? Alrigh'. I'm doin' well, thanks. We'll have to catch up sometime, sometime before the big day. Naw, naw I don' mind. It was a while ago, alrigh'?" He continued to talk to the other person, and soon later, he hung up and turned away from her. "It's late." The finality in his voice told her not to press the issue. He wouldn't talk to her anymore, not about his issues.

Shay didn't reply, she just went over to her bed and crawled under the covers. Her mind reeled as she thought about it. She would have to sort it out with Nick, get him to stop spreading that rumor. Her eyes flickered towards Stephen, who sat on his bed, an envelope in his hand. She recognized it, it looked exactly like the one that John had given her.

"Where'd you get that?" She asked, alarm filling her voice as she sat upright.

"It's from me bag." He answered quietly.

"I-I had one just like it."

"An' this isn' it." He took out the card, looked it over, and slipped it back in. "Yers is where yeh left it." He nodded at the table and she looked. As he said, the envelope sat on the table. Shay grabbed it, and clutched it in her hand. "Where'd yeh get it, anyway?"

"John." She replied, almost afraid to open it. Slowly, she slid her thumb under the flap and tore it open. She was about to take out the card when he stopped her.

"Shay?"

"Y-yes?"

"Don't worry about that." He stated, "It's late, an' we have an important day tomorrow." She nodded, knowing he was right. Shay stood and put it in a pocket of her suitcase before returning to the bed. Sliding back under the covers, she shut her eyes. "Good night, Shay."

"G-Good night." She responded, and turned her back towards him. A few minutes later, she fell into a restless sleep


	8. Invitations

**Alrighty, here we have another chapter of Moth to a Flame :D. I only own Shay and my OCs. Thank you for tuning in, and I hope you are all enjoying it. Drop me a review, some feedback, etc, and please read, review, and enjoy. :D**

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><p>Stephen cracked his eye open and stole a glance at the alarm clock. It flashed four A.M and he groaned. He was about to go back to sleep when he noticed Shay was gone. Her bed was empty, and the room was silent. He frowned, thinking back on the blonde.<p>

He wasn't going to lie. He had been unfair. Pushing himself up, he ran a hand through his hair and stood. Making his way over to the balcony, he opened the doors and nearly jumped.

"Shay?"

The woman stood with her forearms resting against the banister, her eyes studying the city below her. "I couldn't sleep." She responded, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "Great city."

Stephen nodded and stood next to her. "I suppose." He looked her over, seeing the lines of her scar on her leg, the one that peeked out of her tank top, and the one on her face. She was still beautiful, at least that's what he thought. He didn't know where they all came from, the physical or emotional ones, he just knew that there was something she was hiding. Dark secrets loomed inside her, and he couldn't fight the urge to figure them out. He wasn't aware how long he was looking, but she noticed his stare.

"S-see something you like?" Shay turned her head to face him and gave him a smirk. Shaking his head, he cleared his throat and hopped onto the ledge. "D-don't sit there. You could fall." There was a slight edge of panic in her voice, and he chuckled.

"Don't worry abou' me, Princess."

She noticeably shivered and grimaced, "Don't call me that."

"Why? Did someone else call ye tha'?" Stephen asked and she shook her head.

"No, well...one of them might've"

"One o' them?"

"Exes." Shay stated, turning her attention to him. "And, I just...don't like being called Princess."

"I thought all girls wanted to be princesses."

Shay laughed, "I-I used to, but not anymore." She shook her head, blonde curls tossing over her shoulder. "I'm tired of the damsel thing, even though I'm usually distressed. I've played that part already, and all my knights turned out bad." She shrugged, fiddling with her hands. "I know not all guys are bad, I just have a knack for picking the bad ones."

"Was John bad?"

"For the most part? No." Shay sighed. "It ju-just didn't end well." He nodded, not pressing the issue. "You look like the kind of guy who'd wanted to be a superhero."

"No, not a hero. I actually wanted to be a prince." Stephen smiled as she chuckled. "Don't laugh, I just really liked the whole nobility thing."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I jus' felt like it would be great to be the one who got the girl. It was the prestige, the glory of bein' a girl's knight in shinin' armor, that really sunk in. Yeh know? Ev'ry guy wants to be that. Ev'ry guy wants to be a girl's everythin', to be her protector, her friend, lover." he chuckled, "It was either that, or bein' a warrior. Being strong, resilient." He trailed off as Shay moved closer to him. From where he was sitting, he could look straight into her eyes. Shay smiled softly, and put a hand on the railing. "But then, there are the guys who end up bein' the villain, even if they don' want to."

"Girls can be the same."

"I know." He stated. "I think I know yer problem. Yeh dated superheros, not 'princes'." Her eyebrow rose.

"Do share."

"John, John was a superhero. He could walk on walls. Dave had super strength. Nick...Nick's a punk."

"I thought you didn't know about them?"

"Oh," he shook his head, "I know about them, jus' don't know what they did." Stephen explained.

"I still don't understand why you want to know so much. It's not important." Shay stated.

"I beg to differ. They made yeh who yeh are. That's important. Think about it. How would yer life be if they hadn't been in it?"

"Better." She scoffed. "If it wasn't for them, I'd be a completely different person, Stephen. You wouldn't recognize me. They made me into this," she gestured down at herself, "had they not happened, I wouldn't be like this. I-I wouldn't be this shy, quiet, bruised and battered. I wouldn't have such a hard time being myself around people."

Stephen sighed, "But yeh wouldn't be as great as yeh are now. Yeh hear? Through them, yeh learned about strength, about moving on and growin'."

"What is it with you?" She asked. "One minute you're telling me to get over it, the next you're running your mouth about how it made me a better person. W-what if it didn't? I know what it did to me. You don't. So don't start talking like you have any fraction of an idea what their actions did to me."

He drew in a breath, not really sure where his next statement was coming from, "I'm sorry."

"P-pardon me?" Shay leaned in closer, almost assuming she misheard him.

"I said, I'm sorry. There's a reason I've been more of an arse than usual." Stephen coughed and ran a hand over his hair. "There was this girl, a beautiful girl. Ev'rythin' I wanted, an' more." He began and she nodded, confirming she was paying attention. "An' I loved her, more than anythin', or anyone, I had ever loved before. She made me so comfortable, I could be myself. I really could, an' bein' away from her ruined me sometimes. We were together for some time, an' I had been on the road a while. This was about, oh, a year ago." Stephen clarified.

"Like I said, I was away for a while. An', I was allowed to come home early. I was so excited to see her, I bough' flowers an' ev'rything. I got home, got in, an' ev'rything looked fine. Somethin' jus' didn't feel _right_, yeh know?" He paused and she nodded. "I thought that since it was late, she'd be in the bedroom, an' I wanted to surprise her. I made as little noise as possible. I got to the bedroom, opened the door and saw her there on the bed. She was bawlin', jus' bawlin'. Then she asked me to have a seat, an' she took my hands in hers. She said somethin' about not wantin' to keep secrets, an' how much she loved me.

"I was confused, but I wasn't oblivious. I had my suspicions, I jus' didn't want them to be true. She told me she had an affair, while I was away. An', she had been sleepin' with my best friend..._former_ best friend. Obviously, we broke up. I was so furious, yeh feel like shit when someone cheats on yeh, betrays yeh. They toss yeh away like yeh never meant anythin' to them. An' she wanted me to not put it out there, she wanted a relationship with him, an' thought that if he knew I knew, he wouldn' want her." He looked up at Shay, the bewildered and pained look on her face as a hand covered her mouth. He could've sworn he saw tears shining in her eyes, and he cleared his throat. "A few weeks ago, I got a letter, like yeh did, an' I opened it. They wan' me to attend their wedding. He wants me to be his best man. She called 'cause she thought she made the wrong choice."

Shay bit her lip, and he rubbed the back of his neck. Suddenly, he felt a pair of arms wrap around his neck, and the chill of her skin pressed against his own. He was in shock at her sudden movement, and he gingerly put a hand on her back.

"I-I'm so sorry, Stephen." She murmured. "And he doesn't know you knew? He doesn't care it was your ex? You had to stay friends with him?" The flurry of questions spiraled out of her mouth and he nodded. Her grip tightened as she hugged him ."I-I can't imagine what that feels like. I'm so sorry."

"I shouldn't have taken it out on yeh." He whispered. "I'm over her, I really am, it's jus'..."

"It's al-alright." Shay said, "I wouldn't know what to do either if that happened to me. You still feel betrayed, and it's alright." He didn't know why he told her, or what good it really did him, but it felt nice to have the pressure leave his chest. Here in the morning silence, it flew away. A sense of comfort seemed to wash over him, with her arms around him. "You didn't deserve that, Stephen. And she didn't deserve you." He nodded, unsure of what to do. She stepped away, letting a cold burst of air hit his chest. Clearing his throat, he stood. "Stephen?"

Stephen stopped and turned to look at her, "Yes?"

"You deserve better."

"Thanks." He felt a smile tug at his lips, "Now, come in. It's cold outside. How were yeh even out there in shorts?" She shrugged, walking past him and to her bag.

_"So, Shay, tell me, what's it like being back?" Josh Matthews asked, holding the mike towards her._

_ "What it's like?" She laughed, "Josh, such a simple question. It feels great. I'm finally home, where I belong."_

_ "And what do you plan on doing?"_

_ "I'm going for the title, of course." Shay grinned, tossing her hair over her shoulder. The interview went on for a few more moments when Jack Swagger pushed his way onscreen and ripped the mike from Shay's face. She rose an eyebrow and crossed her arms over her chest. Raising a hand, she tapped the taller man on the shoulder. "Excuse me, I was talking."_

_ "I was aware." He sneered and she shook her head. "But, this is more important than some chick returning from nowhere." Swagger turned towards the camera. "Sheamus, this is a message for you. I'm not afraid of you, or anything you can do. Last week was a joke." He looked at the blonde, "Get."_

_ "Get? Hahahah, no." Shay chuckled. "I saw the match, kid, that wasn't a joke."_

_ "Listen. I came with something to say."_

_ "And you're free to continue, after I'm done." Shay stated, taking the mike back and turning to where Josh had been standing. "Aw, you scared him away. What were you saying?" She spoke as Sheamus approached behind Jack, who paid him no attention._

_ "I said Sheamus is a joke. Just like you."_

_ "Really? That's very interesting. So, you have a match tonight, right?" She smiled, and he nodded. "Against Sheamus?"_

_ "Yes, and I will pin him." He emphasized 'pin' as he leaned closer. "And send him crying all the way back to Ireland." Shay broke out in laughter and he snarled. "Somethin' funny, Hart?"_

_ "No." She laughed, "I just...can't see it happening."_

_ "What? Sheamus crying?"_

_ "You beating him." She finished, setting the mike in his hand as she crossed over in front of him. She smiled as she passed Sheamus, pausing to wave. "Hi, Sheamus." He nodded, smirking as he turned back to the horror-stricken Jack Swagger._

_ Later that night..._

_ Shay blocked Tamina with a clothesline and set her up for a Gutwrench Powerbomb. Swagger dashed down the ramp, slid under the ropes and shoved the blonde. She steadied herself and glared at the taller Superstar. "What was that for?" She yelled, shoving him back._

_ He pointed at her, then to the ramp. "I'll show you what I can do to Sheamus." Shay saw Tamina leave the ring out of the corner of her eye. She turned her attention back to Jack. Ducking under the ropes, she grabbed Tamina by her hair and trunks and threw the mutli-generation Diva back into the ring. Kicking the brunette in the stomach, she kept an eye on the blond standing in the corner. His eyes followed her, as if studying her. Shay continued to beat down on Tamina, pushing her into the opposite corner._

_ "Jack." Shay growled, getting in his face. "Get out of my ring." She turned back towards her opponent, only to get slammed to the mat. Cringing, she waited for Tamina to get to the top rope. Tamina sprung off and Shay scrambled up, and reversed it into a Hangman's neckbreaker. Covering Tamina for the pin, Shay got the three count and her music vibrated through the ring. _

_ Shay put a hand on her lower back and raised her fist in the air. Gathering her breath, she grinned and climbed onto the second rope. A hand snaked through her hair, grabbing the locks and throwing her off of the ropes. She landed on the mat with a sharp thud, and a wave of pain shot down her back. She twisted and turned, getting to her knees as Jack approached. A smirk spread across his face as his hands gripped her hair again._

_ **"I think Swagger is still a bit bitter over his loss to Sheamus earlier." Booker stated**_

_** "And I don't think Shay's comment earlier helped anything." Cole added.**_

_** "But should he be taking it out on her? It isn't right."**_

_** "She was being rude!" Cole defended. "She shouldn't have said anything, and she shouldn't have gotten in his way." **_

_Jack pulled Shay to her feet, and swept her into a Gutwrench. As he was about to slam her down, Sheamus's music hit. The Irishman came running down the ramp and into the ring. Jack panicked and dropped the Canadian. He slid past Sheamus, who crouched down to check on Shay._

Shay rested against an equipment box as Nattie stood beside her.

"I loved your reversal." Nattie smiled, putting a hand on her cousin's shoulder "It was smooth, very nice. Your father will end up calling you tonight."

"I-I doubt it."

Nattie shrugged, "It was a good match. Vince likes you, so he gives you opportunity."

"He pities me." Shay laughed, nudging the dust on the floor with her boot.

"Pity doesn't keep you around for eleven years."

"I don't think he gives me opportunity."

"But, you're not afraid to give things an edge. You push the envelope in the match." Nattie said, "so, you going?"

"Wait..what?" Shay's eyebrows crinkled together. "What are you talking about?"

"What do you mean?" Nattie began, before it dawned on her. Her eyes widened, and she shook her head, "You mean you don't know?"

"Know what? Nattie." Shay sighed, "Just tell me."

"John and Mel are getting married."

Shay paused. That much she had expected. It was marriage, it was normal. They had fallen back in love, that was also normal. It didn't bother her, not as much as she thought it would. "So?"

"And they're inviting you."


	9. All On The Table

**Woot, woot. Here's another chappy of Moth to a Flame! :D Things should be starting to pick up, which should be good. :D If any of my readers are still out there, drop me a review and tell me what you think. :D I only own Shay, and Corilynn (who, by the way, will be showing up in a new fic shortly). Please read, review, and enjoy.**

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><p>So she hadn't expected that, the invitation. Why would he invite her? It didn't make sense. They weren't friends anymore, they had barely spoken to each other, and every time she went near him, she felt pain. Perhaps not physical pain, but the searing imprints of reality flared. It was similar to the way she felt around Nick or Dave. It wasn't that she wasn't over it, but that their presence made her uncomfortable, even after all this time. Lame, maybe, but it was how she felt about it. Being around any of them made her skin tighten and tense, and she would be instantly taken back to that place and time.<p>

"Yeah, so?" She stated, and Nattie gasped.

"Shay, it's your ex-boyfriend."

"I know."

"Why are you so comfortable with this?"

"I-I'm not going to weep, Nat. It's over between John and I, it has been for a while."

"Are you going to go?"

Shay drew in a breath, "I don't know." She didn't want to go, not really. She'd contemplate the offer though, and the proposition would weigh on her mind. If she went, she would be awkward, like she was at the beginning. She was happy for Melina, though. Everyone deserved happiness, for the most part, anyway, But she wondered if the Latina knew what happened.

"Alright." Nattie shrugged, "do whatever you want. Hey, Cody's been staring at you." Nattie grinned, nudging Shay with her elbow. "Anything going on between you two?"

"Nattie." Shay sighed, "No. Nothing is going with Cody and I. And, he's not staring."

"Mmhmm." Nattie said, unconvinced. "He's been looking at you for about five minutes now. Oh, and he's coming to say hi." Her cousin laughed as the brunette approached.

"Hello, ladies." He grinned, resting his arm on the equipment box. "You alright, Shay?"

"Huh?" She asked, bringing her attention to him. "I-I'm sorry."

"Are you alright? Your match...and Swagger."

"Oh. Yeah, yeah I'm fine." She smiled, "Thanks." Shay rolled her shoulders. Her back was sore, but otherwise, she was fine. Cody nodded, his smile faltering, but not quite vanishing.

"That's good. I was afraid you'd get hurt."

"Has Adam, or Jay talked to you lately?" Shay asked. Adam had recruited his friends into guarding her, as if she needed it. Randy had explained it as being there for her, and she could understand where he was coming from. She was pretty much alone here. Jay was out, Chris was gone, and Adam was gone. She didn't have many friends, or anyone else, for that matter. Not entirely. There was Nattie, and a few people who were on the Raw roster. She was stranded there in Smackdown.

"Nope. Do they need to talk to me?" His smile as alluring, and he had one of those enticing auras. One that grabbed attention, drew it in, and held it there until he decided to dismiss it. Cody chuckled and ran a hand over his head.

"No." She smiled shyly, tucking hair behind her ear. "I, just... never mind."

Cody shrugged, "Alright. So, are you missing Adam?"

"Of course. He's my friend, practically a brother."

"You know, I could be your friend." His words floated out of his mouth, and she couldn't deny that she wanted to believe him. His words could've convinced her by themselves, if she gave them the chance. "Why don't you come out tonight, with us?"

"With us?" Shay repeated.

"Yeah, us. The guys, girls, all of us. We're going out after the show for a little bit."

She froze. She generally hated club settings, or anything to do with them. It was something she never quite got over. If she did go, she'd spend the whole night sitting at a table and sipping a glass of water, and she knew that. Shay rarely enjoyed 'going out'. There were always too many things for her to trip over, stumble upon, and it was a waste of her time. "I don't think so, Cody."

He looked hurt, but shrugged it off. "C'mon, Shay. It'll be fun."

"Yeah, Shay, it'll be fun." Nattie chuckled. "It's been a while since you've been out."

"Actually, only a few weeks. Really. I just don't want to go." She stated, and that was the truth. She had a bad reputation with them. And, being surrounded by noise and confrontation wasn't her forte.

"We'd miss you." Cody tried again, flashing his smile at her again.

"Mmhmm," Shay murmured, "Cody... I-I'll think about it."

He looked like he had accomplished a great feat, and he grinned as he put a hand on her shoulder. "I'd really like to see you there. Lemme just give you the address." Cody trailed off as he looked around the area. "Actually, um, I'll text it to you." He drew out his phone, "What's your number?"

Shay hesitated, and Nattie jumped in, rattling off the number. Shay's eyebrows furrowed and she sent Nattie a look. The other blonde shrugged, and smiled at the brunette. "She'll be there."

"Alright, sounds good. I'll see you later, Shay." He waved slightly as he went down the hall. Shay turned towards her cousin.

"What was _that_?"

"That," Nattie started, "was a guy who wants to go out with you. He gave you his number."

"Actually, you gave him mine." She corrected and Nattie rolled her eyes.

"You say tomato, I say tomato." Nattie shrugged. "Now come on, you have to get dressed." Her eyes flickered over her cousin. "Because you're not going dressed like that."

Shay looked down at her jeans, sneakers, and t-shirt. "Uh...I am dressed."

Nattie laughed. "Let me see what you brought with you." She looped her arm through Shay's and led her to the locker room. Entering, she released her cousin. "Kaitlyn, meet Shay. Shay... Kaitlyn. You know Layla." Nattie nodded towards the two women, who nodded back. "Shay here just got asked out by Mr. Rhodes."

"No, I didn't." Shay replied, plopping down on the bench. "Nattie has it in her head that he did."

"Shay, it's been a while, and a guy is _interested_ in you. Take a chance."

"Nattie. Every time I've taken a chance thus far, has only ended in disaster."

"Cody isn't John. Not every guy here is a monster. Shay." Nattie put her hands on her hips. "Let us help you."

Shay thought about it. "Fine." She sighed, shaking her head as she rubbed her temples.

Twenty minutes later, she studied her reflection. "It's not...too bad." She murmured. Shay was dressed simply, something she liked, but it wasn't entirely what Nattie called 'boring'. Skinny jeans, flat, black boots reached just below her knee and a white half jacket covered a dark blue camisole. And they had let her keep her makeup simple. Layla had been left to do her hair while Nattie had an errand to run. Kaitlyn had left soon after, bidding the Canadian goodbye.

"Hey," Layla smiled sheepishly as she dragged a brush through the blonde locks.

"Hey." Shay muttered, drumming her fingers across her knee. Her relationship with the other woman had been rocky at best.

"I'm sorry."

"Save it." She stated.

"I was just..." Confusion warped Layla's face and she was cut off again by Shay.

"It's fine." Shay continued, "I-I'm not trying to be rude, Layla. It's the past, it happened. I don't need apologies. Actions speak louder than words anyway." She didn't trust Layla, it was simple. Layla had helped Michelle on several occasions, she had played along.

"But it's nice to know in words." The woman shrugged. "So, Cody, eh?" She grinned and Shay smiled back.

"He didn't ask me out."

"He's a good guy. Hot too."

Shay laughed, nodding as Layla worked on her hair "True. True. Hey, I'm sorry about your injury."

"Things happen." Layla patted her shoulders. "You're done, Shay." Shay nodded, following the brunette out of the arena and to the car.

The club was crowded as they made their way inside. Shay slunk through the growing mass of grinding bodies as she searched for an open booth. She kept her eyes peeled for Cody, or any sign of him. Her nose wrinkled as somebody pressed against her, stumbling. "Sorry." The man mumbled and she nodded, slipping past him. Shay found an open booth, and in a significant stroke of luck, she found Cody sitting there. He stood, his arms outstretched.

"Shay," He enveloped her in a hug. "Glad you could make it."

"I didn't really have a choice. They kinda pushed me out the door." Shay chuckled.

"Sit, have a drink." Cody grinned, taking his seat as she slid across from him. "How've you been?"

"Good, since the last time you saw me." She couldn't fight the smile that breached her face. "You?"

"Better. I'm glad you're on Smackdown. It's great seeing you more often. Question is, am I getting you, or am I getting the facade you put on around everybody?"

"Depends, do you think you deserve to see the real thing?" She cocked her head to the side, waiting for him to respond.

"That depends on you. I've heard a lot about you, Shay, but I'm not sure if any of it's the real thing. I don't know the story of you." He took a drink of his beverage as Layla and Wade slipped into the booth, Kaitlyn and Justin next. Shay sighed, burying her face in her hands. She could feel her skin grow hot. "Hey, guys." His voice fell, as if seeing the extra people was a burden.

"W-well," Shay muttered, taking in a breath. She barely knew the man across from her. She barely knew any of the people surrounding her, but something inside her was compelling her to spill. Something inside her was urging her to tell them, tell Cody, everything. It was a pitcher full of water, threatening to be tilted. There wasn't any nit-picking about what she could and couldn't say. If she started, there wouldn't be a stop. It was people she didn't know, and that felt strange to her. She never opened up to people, not until she could fully trust them.

Then why was she contemplating telling these strangers about her life story? What good would it do her, aside from lifting the monkey from her back.

"Did we interrupt something?" Wade, Stu, more appropriately, asked.

"Yes."

"No." They both spoke at the same time, and Shay looked at Cody. "N-no," she finished, clearing her throat. "I feel like the odd one out." Shay laughed half-heartedly, "I just, you know what? I-I'll go." She regretted it, but it was her response. When confronted with fight or flight, she was the sheepish little pigeon, flying away in the other direction.

"No, don't go." Cody stood, "Please." He smiled and Shay cursed herself. She shouldn't have let the domino effect start. She sat back down, twisting her hands in her lap as her heart raced. "So, tell me something about yourself."

"You all know my father, I, uh... grew up surrounded by this business. I am probably _the_ biggest klutz y-you will ever meet." Shay shook her head. "A-and if you treat me with respect. And," she trailed off, biting her lip as she contemplated it. Before she could stop herself, she became an open book, the words tumbled out of her mouth. Her hands stayed clasped on the table as she spilled the stories. Growing up in the Hart Dungeon, Owen's death, her first match in the WWF; her personal life and how everything started falling apart. Somehow, Nick and Dave entered the conversation and hot tears formed in her eyes. She didn't register how they were taking in the information, all she really could comprehend was that she was giving it to them, people she had barely spoken to. Each word was a weight being lifted, and she shook her head in response to something Kaitlyn had asked.

John, how he was her saving grace, everything he had done for her, his part in her life, it came out too. From the rise, to the fall, she let it go. Shay briefly looked up, taking in the looks on their faces: confusion, shock, maybe a tiny flash of pity. The night was somber in this little aura she had created, while music thumped in the distance. It felt good to talk about it, but it was still hard.

By the time she had finished, tears had left her eyes. Wiping them away, she apologized and stood, "I-I...I have to go," Shay stammered, "Good night." Shay left the bar and rested her back against the wall. The sky was black, speckled with stars and the city was buzzing. She cursed herself again, suddenly wishing she hadn't told them. What would they do about it? They wouldn't look at her the same way again, they'd pity her, wouldn't they? Would this become another point against her, another snide remark? She felt another presence next to her and she glanced at the man.

"C-Cody?"

He didn't respond, he just pulled her into his arms, his hands resting on her back. He didn't speak, he just held her, and she had to admit that it was the safest she had felt for a long time.


	10. Royal Rumble

**Okay, here's another chapter of Moth to a Flame. I only own Shay, and Cori. I apologize for any spelling errors, or grammatical mistakes. I'm only human, lol. Um, I think that's it, aside from the fact that there is some more information on my profile, and that this story will start to pick up shortly. :) There will also be some minor/short time skips. Love, Kiwi. **

**Read, review, and enjoy :D**

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><p>Stephen surveyed her, studying her movements from across the table. She was fidgeting, drumming her fingers across the tabletop. A sigh passed her lips, and that's when he just had to ask.<p>

"Are yeh alright?"

"Huh?" Shay looked up at him and nodded, "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine."

"I was jus' wonderin'. Yeh don't seem to sleep much."

Shay sent him a curious look. Sure they stayed in the same room, but she had always covered up her poor sleeping habits. She was careful, mastering the art of pretending to be asleep. For one, she was worried he'd ask, and then somehow rope her into telling him about the sporadic nightmares, and that was something she wouldn't allow. He, he had this aura, this front that seemed to repel weakness. She couldn't be weak in front of him, it'd simply be fodder for him, "I sleep just fine, thank you."

"I'm not stupid, Shay. When I go to bed, you're still up. When I wake up, you're up. If I wake up in the middle of the night, you're readin', or somethin'," Stephen shrugged. "So, are yeh okay?"

"Yes," she couldn't fight the exasperation in her voice. She was tired, still, from her lack of sleep the night before. He was right, she wasn't sleeping well. But she had a job to do, and so many people that she couldn't disappoint. A yawn ripped from her throat and she rested her head in her hands.

"Yeh haven't eaten much either." Did he really have to point everything out? She didn't feel hungry, she didn't want to eat. She was busy, and with everything that was being pushed together, she was sometimes too nervous to even think about feeding herself. It was stupid, and it'd come back to bite her, that she was sure of.

"Christ's sake, Stephen," she winced as she snapped, "Just leave me alone, alright?" Shay stood and walked towards the backstage area. She found a steel chair to sit on, facing a monitor and ran a hand through her hair. She had been stuck on Raw tonight, mostly due to Stephen. Another "January 2nd" promo flashed across the screen. Who could possibly be returning? It wasn't 'Taker, that she knew for sure. Her mind went over the options, until her train of thought was halted.

"Scarface, say hello to my little friend."

She glanced up, noticing Kelly Kelly and the Bellas. Groaning, she rubbed her temples, "H-hello, Kelly. Nikki, Brie." There wasn't a point in fighting back. She was too tired, and she really didn't care anymore. She remembered something Nattie had told her once, 'kill them with kindness'. Shay laughed inwardly, thinking it was probably one of the more ridiculous things she'd heard.

"C'mon, girls, leave her alone."

She knew that voice, and she heard the clatter of their heels as the three walked away. The seat next to her was occupied now, and the person put a hand on her knee. Shay brushed it off, "W-what do you want, Nick?"

"How much does Sheamus know?"

"Nothing," she laughed, "Does it matter, really? You tried that stupid little trick when I was dating John, alright? You don't care how much he knows, you just like seeing me squirm."

"Alright," he sat back, "Then you won't mind me telling him."

"Why would you want to tell him? I mean, seriously? What good would that do? You and I had a past, and that's that. He just doesn't have to know, nobody really has to know," Shay replied, trying to stop herself from shaking. Nick was about to say something else when Vickie called him over to her. He had a match, and she was free from him.

Some time later, yet another promo interrupted the "Did You Know" clip and the lights went out in the ring. She had had some idea of who it could be, but now, she had absolutely no idea. Her hand reached for her phone, about to call Chris and ask him what he thought when...

_Break the walls down!_

Yeah, she was going to have a long talk with him later. Her eyes widened as the lights flashed on again and there stood Jericho, in all his glory. She put her phone away, and stood, waiting for him to come backstage. He was out there for a few minutes before he returned, and she beat him to the gorilla.

"Christopher Keith Irvine," she saw him flinch, and frankly, it fueled her, "why didn't you tell me you were coming back? You had me guessing at every damn promo, and you didn't say a word? Ch-Chris," she put her hands on her hips as she shook her head. He grinned at her, holding his arms out and she put her arms around him. "I'm glad you're back," she whispered as he swayed a little.

"Glad I'm back, too."

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><p><strong>January 29<strong>**th****, 2012**

_Chris Jericho approached his fellow Canadian, who was leaning against a table. As he came closer, she stood straighter, "Shay," he nodded._

_ "Jericho," she replied, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear, "Good luck in the Rumble tonight." _

_ "I don't need luck," he stated, continuing past her and off down the hallway. Shay shook her head, returning her attention to Sheamus, who had walked up as Chris left._

_ "Hello," she smiled, folding her hands together, "I never got the chance to thank you for helping me out against Swagger. I know it happened a while ago, but better late than never, right?"_

_ He laughed, nodding as she put a hand on his forearm, "True, true. Any time, really. I couldn' leave a woman in distress." _

_ "And, good luck in the Rumble tonight. You have a good chance of winning, if your luck is right," Shay's smile faltered as he pulled her closer._

_ "They say kissin' the Irish brings good luck."_

_ "We'll see about that," she patted his arm before she walked away, brushing her fingers along his stomach as she went._

As soon as she was out of the way, she sat down. She had felt worse that day, more than she had in a while. She didn't get any sleep the night before, and hadn't really had anything to eat. It was busy, busy, busy. Waking up at five in the morning, when you just fell asleep at two, and having promos, signings, and training slung back to back, she was surprised she was even still functioning. Well, at least she thought she fell asleep... she couldn't really remember.

Gauging her time, she realized she just didn't have enough of it. They'd get to the hotel late tonight, and have to fly out early the next day. It was a domino effect, and she was beginning to really feel the sting. She jumped as Stephen sat next to her. "Stephen."

"Sorry," he muttered, running a hand through his hair, "You don't look well."

"Thanks," she stated, rolling her eyes as she tried to make herself comfortable. Great, now she was dizzy.

"I'm just sayin', you look tired,"

"I know, Cody told me earlier, and Nattie, p-pretty sure Eve did too," Shay shrugged, as if wasn't a big deal. "Do you want me to come out with you?"

Stephen shook his head, "Not if you're feeling like shit." He looked her over, "Yeh could go back to the hotel. I'd get somebody to drive yeh."

"No, Stephen. I'm fine. I just need to sit down for a while, that's all." She nodded, as if that would convince him. He just patted her knee.

"I have to go, the Rumble." She nodded again, mumbling one more good luck as he left.

As the night wore on, she felt crummier and crummier, to say the least. Chris stood to her left, worry painting his face, "Shay? Shay!"

"Huh?" This spacing out was getting out of control... "What?"

He sighed, putting his hands on her shoulders, "When was the last time you slept, or ate?"

She shrugged, yawning, "I slept today, and I ate this morning." Well, she didn't think half a bagel really counted as eating, but it was the truth. His eyebrow was cocked, he didn't believe her. She just hoped he trusted her enough to let it go. Part of her was afraid he'd make a big deal out of it and force her back to the hotel to rest. What was the point, she wouldn't have been able to sleep. She was better off here, "You're up next in the Rumble," she murmured, putting her hands on his forearms, "So, go. Kick ass."

"You're worrying me." There was the guilt trip. He, Adam, and Jay had that one down. The stare, crinkled eyebrows and posture, they were all far too good at it. They knew that she couldn't bear being a burden, or the primary source of worry. They also knew when she was lying, even when she started to believe the lie herself.

"I-I'm sorry, Chris. I'm fine, really. I'll go back to the hotel right after the show and go right to sleep."

"And you'll eat."

"Y-yes, Chris," she replied, "Now go." She waved him off, and he went, although begrudgingly. Resting against the wall, she kept her eyes trained on the monitor, watching as Chris's music struck and he went out there. She kept an eye on Stephen, almost wincing as he was nearly eliminated. The world started to tilt, and she snapped her eyes shut. Slowly opening them again, she braced herself against an equipment box and watched the match.

Black dots danced in her vision, and she felt herself getting lightheaded. Hoping it'd pass, she fiddled with the hem of her cardigan. Shaking her head, she tried to focus on the match, and that seemed to work. It continued, Chris nearly eliminating Stephen, and vice versa, and she bit her lip. She wanted Chris to win, even though it seemed unlikely. Stephen deserved this, maybe a little bit more than the others. She could see the push he was getting, and the subsequent push it gave her. This would've been the crowning moment, and he'd be on a sure fire path to champion.

Plus, Stephen had seemed to mellow out. He seemed less ornery and more... she couldn't quite describe it. It just seemed that they hadn't been bantering as much as usual. Shrugging it off, she tried to ignore the dotted vision and moving earth.

And then, Chris was eliminated. Her hand covered her mouth as Stephen exploded into celebration, and Chris slunk backstage. Meeting him at the gorilla, she wrapped her arms around the blond. "You were great, Chris!"

"Yeah," he laughed, "I think Creative has something going for me at Raw, so, it's fine. How are you doing?" The worried tone went back to his voice and she chuckled.

"Fine, really," Alright, that was a lie. She didn't see a problem with lying, particularly if it was something she didn't think he needed to worry about. Truthfully, her world was spinning and it was taking every strand of her concentrated effort not to fall down. Stephen approached, his hand massaging his neck. He had stopped at the locker room, and was dressed with his bag over his shoulder. "Stephen, congratulations." She slid over to him, arms crossed over her chest.

"Thanks," he smiled, but it faltered, "Shay... you're not alright."

"D-don't worry, I'm fine. Really, I'll be fine." She stammered, losing her footing and falling forward. Shay clutched Stephen's shirt, and his arm wrapped around her waist. She looked up at him, saw the worry and confusion in his eyes, and then it all went black.


	11. Tell Me A Story

**Hullo everyone, I apologize for such a short chapter :/, but hey, you get a little bit of insight on the both of them, and it's some Shay/Stephen time. Wooo, anywho, I apologize for the way-too-often summary changes. I am way too indecisive for my own good, now, I only own Shay. I finished What She Left Behind, and the epilogue for that is coming soon, so if any of you want to check that out, go right ahead. Also, I apologize for the spelling and grammar errors. There should be a new story of mine coming out soon, so that's exciting, gah I got off track. On to the chapter!**

Love, Kiwi

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><p>Shay groaned, wiping at her eyes as she sat up. She was in her hotel room, and the bed next to her was empty. Looking around, her eyes fell on the small lamp illuminating the corner of the room. Sprawled in the chair, a book loosely held in his hand, was Stephen. He looked up, then did a double take. Standing, he rushed over to her, "Yer' up."<p>

"Uh, yeah," she rubbed her forehead, "What happened?"

"Yeh fell, and yeh fainted," Anger, some bizarre emotion flashed as he sat on the edge of the bed, "How yeh feelin'?"

"Fine," she muttered, "Tired, but fine. What time is it?"

"Midnight, yeh should go back to sleep. It's only been half an hour since we got back," he stifled a yawn and she shook her head.

"It'll take me forever. Besides, maybe you should get to sleep, Mr. Royal Rumble," she stated and he smiled slightly, "We're here alone?" He nodded, shutting the book and tossing it onto the other bed.

"Yeh wouldn' believe how long it took me to convince Jericho to allow yeh to stay with me." He stated, "He really cares about yeh, if I didn't know any better, I'd say yeh were with him."

Shay sent him a look, "Chris? No, th-that's why John and I broke up anyway," she shook her head, "He thought I was cheating on him with Chris. It wasn't the truth, and..." she trailed off, "It doesn't matter. It ended, and that's that. Seriously, Stephen, go to bed. I'll be fine."She pulled her hair over her shoulder, fiddling with the ends as she avoided his curious gaze. Yeah, that was one nutshell he wouldn't be prying into.

"Nope, scoot over," she did and he slid in next to her, "If yer stayin' up, I am too."

"C'mon, Stephen," Shay groaned, "How'd you even get me up here?"

"Yer a dead weight when yeh sleep. Yeh fainted, then when yeh woke up we got yeh checked by the trainer. Yeh fell asleep in the car on the way back, an' I carried yeh up here."

"Huh, and I thought that was just a really weird dream," she bit her lip, her eyebrows knitting together as she looked down at herself. "That's why I'm still dressed." She sat up, pulling her knees closer to her and hugging them to her chest, "You should sleep."

"So should yeh," he laced his fingers behind his head and relaxed, "Lil' Insomniac. Yeh seein' anybody?" Her eyebrow rose at the abruptness and he shrugged, "Jus' curious."

"Me? No. No, I'm no seeing anyone," she played with the fraying end of her jeans, "I made a vow earlier to never date a coworker again. Every time I try it ends in disaster. N-Nick, Dave, John," she shook her head, "No, that backfired too many times. You?"

"Nah, same with me, only reversed. I think it'd be much easier, perhaps better if I'd start datin' a coworker. Less hassle, more understandin'." She agreed with him there. It was always easier, you got to see each other more. They understood the schedule, how hard it was to be away from home, it was a cleaner play, but a messy cut. If things didn't work out, you were stuck seeing them day in and day out, working closely with them, and if you were unlucky, had vicious rumors circulating.

"So," she began, trying to ease into the topic, "when's the wedding?" She heard his sharp intake, and she almost apologized when he answered.

"May. You?" So he had heard, of course. Who hadn't? He had probably overheard it from someone, how she was invited to an ex's wedding. All in all, it wasn't uncommon, maybe people just knew more than they let on.

"June, John always did love summer. I was more of a spring and fall. She deserves this," she stated, as if to cement that she didn't care, "Melina. She deserves a wedding, you know? I think everyone deserves love, I just... he just wasn't mine. Mel's a good girl, especially for him." The words spilled out of her mouth and she peered at him. Stephen nodded.

"Of course. Spring's beautiful."Desperate to change the topic she grinned and turned to look at him.

"You wanna know how Nattie, Davey and I used to spend our summer vacation?" She paused, "Dad, well... Bret, he'd take us on the road with him and the Neidharts. Then on our down days, when we got older, he'd start teaching us holds. And, promise you won't tell anyone?" He nodded, and she continued, "I used to practice the Sharpshooter on teddy bears." She bit her lip, grinning as he laughed, "Not funny... alright, it is. But come on, I was eight. And they were the bigger teddy bears, he wouldn't let me learn in the ring. I'd learn by watching until he actually let us into the ring."

Stephen supported himself on his elbow, his head in his hand as he lay on his side. A smile spread across his face as she spoke, elaborating and gesturing with her hands as she recounted random little bursts. "Shay?" He asked, drawing her attention to him.

"Y-yes, Stephen?" She stopped, her hands resting on her stomach.

"You're gettin' loopy," he replied, brushing a lock of hair out of her face as she straightened out, resting her head in the pillow. Shrugging, she chuckled.

"Yeah, I-I probably am. I get, um..." she grappled for the right word, "_D-different_ when I'm tired." Shay yawned, "Adam, Jay, Chris... they'll have you believe that this is the me they see. T-they're probably right." She whispered the last part, her hand partially covering her mouth. "Stephen?"

"Yeah?" He fought back the yawn. He was tired, he was sore, and he wanted to get to sleep, but she was making that difficult. Something inside him wanted to make sure she was okay. She scared him, when she collapsed. At first he thought she just fell, but when she didn't respond, worry instantly set in. She didn't say anything for awhile, but then she reached out running her hand through his hair.

"Your hair is darker when you're a heel," she mused, "S-sorry." She retracted her hand, but held his gaze. He murmured that it was alright, a little surprised at the sudden gesture. Shay was right, she was acting differently, and if this was the her her friends saw, he would rather be her friend. Or maybe it was the fact that she had paid attention to him, all that time ago. Whatever it was, she had his attention, and it wouldn't be straying anytime soon.

The woman before him was a mystery, a bundle of secrets and he wanted to know more about her. He made a note to Google her later, just to see what would come up, and talk to the people who had known her the longest.

Her eyes fleeted away from his, "N-Nick talked to me earlier."

His eyebrow rose. She never said much about Nick, regardless of how many times he pressed her for information, "Oh."

"He and I didn't have a good relationship," she murmured. "He was rude, and controlling, a-and condescending. It wasn't a good, or healthy relationship. He still seems to think that he has control over me, how I think and what I do." Shay glanced up, seeing that he was paying attention.

"Yeh don't have to say..." He began, but she cut him off.

"Yeah, I do. Every mistake I made was highlighted by him, a-and I tried so hard to be everything he wanted. I was never perfect enough, never flawless enough for him and I wanted to be, so, so bad. I-I loved him, I didn't want to lose him, and I was afraid I would. You wouldn't have recognized me, Stephen." Shay shook her head, "I barely recognized myself, and Nick got to be too much, eventually. So, I left him. A-Adam and Jay made me leave him, they tried to tell me that he didn't love me. I thought he did, and that it was just harder for him to show it." She stopped, feeling moisture on her cheeks. Crying, but why? Over something that happened years ago? It was a weight being lifted. "Stephen?"

"Yeah?"

"Tell me a story," Shay said quietly as he gave her a look, "I-I'm serious. I've heard all the ones around here. Surely there has to be some variety in other countries." She gave him a pleading look, "Please?" He sighed, relenting as she made herself comfortable.

"Yer serious about this." She nodded, and he continued. "One second," he thought,moving so he was sitting up with his back against the headboard, "My mum always told me this one..." he began telling the story, gesturing as she followed it. It was a story about a boy who had fallen for a girl he couldn't have, yet still saved her from the villain. About ten minutes later, he finished it up, "An' they both lived happily ever after." Stephen stopped, waiting for her response. When nothing came, he looked over at her. She was curled up, hair splayed over the pillow and a small smile on her face. He smiled, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face, "Goodnigh', Shay."

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><p><strong>Remember to leave a review, bitches love reviews. Lol, jk, but seriously, please review :D<strong>


	12. If I Tell You the Truth

**Hello! Here's chapter 12 of Moth to a Flame, I only own Shay. This one also features a small time skip, and the next chapter might too, oh well. I think the next chapter will feature some Shay/Cody, we'll see :) Thank you to all who have reviewed, story alerted, favorited, etc. I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors. Reviews = love, so leave me some love:) Please read, review, and enjoy. Oh, and since I pretty much finished What She Left Behind, I started another story, so check it out!:D**

**Other than that, read, review, and enjoy:D**

**Kiwi**

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><p><strong>February 2nd, 2012<strong>

"Nattie!" He called, jogging to catch up to the blonde, who was walking with Beth. She turned, and her eyebrow hiked up when she saw him.

"Stephen," she nodded, "What is it?"

"I need to talk to you about Shay."

"Shay? Sure thing, what about her?" Nattie stopped, crossing her arms over her chest. Beth left, leaving the two of them alone in the hallway. "Is she okay? I heard about her fall."

"Yeah," he nodded, running a hand through his hair, "I jus' want a way to get through to her, yeh know?"

Nattie scoffed, "C'mon, Stephen. I'm pretty sure there isn't a way to get through to her. Why? What did you need to talk to her about?" She questioned, eyebrow arching, "Because I can tell you right now that if you're planning on asking about Nick, or Dave, or John, or the crash, you're better off not even bothering. I'm not supposed to say."

"Like yeh've never done somethin' yeh weren't supposed to," Stephen sighed, "I tried askin', but she doesn't say."

"And I'm not going to either. Listen, I practically _just_ rebuilt the relationship I lost with her. Not sure if you know this or not, but that's a statement in itself." Nattie glanced away, "Usually if you lose something with her, it's gone. She's porcelain, Stephen. One misstep, one misplaced finger, snap or slip, and it's gone. I'm not putting that in jeopardy again. You can try asking Chris, and Adam, and Jay, but they're going to give you the exact same response. I'm sorry, Stephen, she just doesn't open up to people easily."

Stephen nodded, muttering a thanks as he headed towards catering. He saw the blonde in the line, and he was glad she was getting something to eat. Although, he did hear her muttering about Randy being a 'damn watchdog'. He joined her just as she was getting a cup of coffee, "I can hold tha' for yeh, if yeh'd like."

"Jesus!" She yelped, looking over her shoulder, "Would you _stop_ that?"

"Sure, if yeh start payin' attention." He grinned, motioning towards her plate, "I can take that, so yeh can make yer coffee."

"T-thank you," he took the plate as she poured a copious amount of creamer into the Styrofoam cup and stirred it. He smirked.

"Wan' some coffee with that creamer? It's almost as white as I am."

Shay looked up at him, the annoyance fading into a smile, "Trust me, this is nothing. If you want white coffee, let Chris make the pot." She took her plate from him and was about to walk away when he caught her by the elbow.

"Come, sit with my friends and I."

"Oh," she looked amused, "I-I don't think that's such a good idea."

"C'mon, they're good guys," he lead her over to the table, pulling up an extra chair for himself. Shay looked towards the ceiling, mumbling something as she sat down. They were greeted by Stu, Heath, and PJ. Shay winced as she saw Stu, recounting the bar a while back. He seemed to still remember, judging by the look he gave her. "Hey, fellas."

"H-hi," she waved slightly, turning her main attention towards her food. A few moments passed by, and she glanced up at them. "Y-you know you can stop staring any time you'd like."

"I know, it's just... are you okay?" It was a simple question, but her grip tightened on her fork.

"Yes, Heath, I'm fine. It's not like I don't have Chris blowing up my phone." As if on cue, her phone rang and she picked it up, "He-hello? Adam? Chris called you? Of course he did," she paused, excused herself from the table and made her way around the corner. A few moments later, Chris took her seat, he glanced at the others before focusing in on Stephen.

"Is she alright?"

"Why don' yeh ask her yerself?" He replied.

Chris sighed, "Because she doesn't like to admit when things aren't alright. It worries me sometimes, how she tells us she's fine when she's not." He ran a hand through his hair, "Where is she?"

"Adam called her," PJ stated, "She went around the corner to talk to him. Hey," Justin trailed off, "is she... single?"

Chris's face hardened, "Don't even _think_ about it, Junior."

PJ's hands shot up, "No, no, I'm not thinking about it. Beautiful girl an' all, but nah, don't worry. It's Cody. She's been talking to him a lot lately." Chris shook his head.

"Cody's alright, I guess."

"I also heard Nick's trying to get with her," Heath butted in." Chris's eyes lit up, burning with anger. His hand curled around the cup, crinkling it. Stephen's face hardened and Stu shook his head. "What? Is that a bad thing? Nick's a nice guy. As far as I know," the redhead shrugged.

"Yeah, kid," Chris stood, shaking slightly, "As far as you know."

**Elimination Chamber, February 19th, 2012**

Shay scowled at her reflection in the mirror, tugging at hem of her dress. Unsatisfied with the fact that that was as far is it could possibly go, she groaned and tried to tug the sleeves forward. With a sigh, she gave up and planted her hands on her hips. The dress was teal, with sleeves that doubled as the actual top half and barely covered her shoulders, and a hem that barely breached mid-thighs. A knot was nestled right below the bust and she studied the reflection more.

Perhaps, another thing that irritated her was the heels; tall, nude pumps. She didn't walk well in heels, she could've sworn Wardrobe knew that. Shay pressed her fingers to her temple, and fought the urge to run her fingers through her hair. Fingering the ends of the blonde curls, she groaned again. Vince, and Creative, wanted her to cut a promo, about her growing feud with Tamina, and possibly transferring that feud onto Beth, among other things.

Turning, she tried to adjust the dress once more before giving up, "T-thank you," she nodded towards the stylist as she left. She braced a hand against the wall, feeling her legs shake in the heels, "B-biggest damn klutz and he gives me heels," Shay murmured, nearly tripping over a wire, but caught herself in time. Continuing on her way, she made her way through the halls. She found an open area where a few of the guys were hanging out. Stu, Cody, PJ, and Stephen were standing around, chatting.

"H-hey, uh, mind if I tag along, until I have to go out?" She asked quietly, almost unheard by the guys. Cody looked up at grinned.

"Of course," He gestured for her to come forward, bringing her next to Stu, who nearly laughed.

"I know," she stated pointedly, "I look like a slut." Shay couldn't fight off the slight irritation in her voice. Her hand instantly went to her chest, knowing her scar was showing.

Stephen smiled, "It's a shame I don' have a match tonigh'. I woulda enjoyed havin' yeh as my valet."

"Uh-huh," Shay nodded, grinning back and feeling her cheeks grow hot. Granted, it wasn't nearly as exposing as some of the other things the other girls were wearing. "Fear not, you will be seeing my ass going down to that ring tonight. I, um, interview/promo thing." Shay shook her head, "How are you boys tonight?"

"Fine, thanks," PJ replied. "No match?"

"Nah, next time, hopefully," she chuckled, "I-I, um... next time. H-have any of you seen Chris?"

"Right here, Snowy, and I brought you a birthday gift." She recognized Chris's voice as footsteps approached and hands flew over her eyes.

"Chris, I thought I told you not to get me anything, besides, my birthday's tomorrow?" Shay asked and she heard his laugh.

"I didn't get you anything," Chris snorted, "Guess."

Shay huffed, "_Chris._" She heard the guys chuckling, and she almost turned around before Chris stopped her, "Alright, alright. It's not Adam, it's not you...Brad Pitt?" Shay laughed, "S-seriously." Chris tsk-ed, putting an arm around her waist.

"For one thing, you look great. Two, think, my little Snowy Owl. It's the middle of winter, but we're in Milwaukee and it's colder than a witch's tit, so I doubt any birds are flying around. And your gift almost didn't arrive, and damn I almost had a bird." He emphasized, putting his hand on her shoulder and patting it. A grin spread across her face as she spun around.

"_Jay_!" Shay squealed, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing his cheek. His arms wrapped around her waist as Chris slid over to Stephen. Twirling her around, he laughed.

"Happy birthday, Shay." He set her down and slung an arm over her shoulders. The rest looked on as Chris sidled up next to her again, and the grin on her face broadened. Jay looked down at her, smirking, "Well, you're showing a lot of skin."

"Promo," she stated.

"One wrong move and you'll be giving them a show they didn't pay to see," Jay's smile and wink caused her to smack his chest.

"Not that anybody would object," Chris fake-coughed and Shay swatted his arm, still smiling.

"I want you to go down to the ring, get into the ring, and cut a promo in heels and a barely-there dress."

"Mind you, Jericho and I were in towels on the ramp, don't be complaining, missy." He chastised, shaking his head.

"I practically flashed half a locker room," Shay taunted, giving him a 'what now' face.

"I remember that." Cody laughed, and the others raised there eyebrows.

"Something you're not telling us, love?" Stu asked and she relaxed under Jay's arm, retelling the story of her infamous fall in the men's locker room.

"There was blood, and I had to explain to the trainer, and it all just...fun day."

She seemed so much calmer, Stephen noted, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw Cody staring at Shay, his eyes barely leaving her. Shay always was more comfortable around Jay, Adam, and Chris, that much he knew, he just didn't realize how much that statement held true. A few minutes later, Chris had to leave, the RAW Elimination Chamber was getting closer. Still, even without Chris there, she was still close to Jay. She was laughing, slightly more teasing and energetic. It was... interesting, to say the least. He had watched her morph. Now, she seemed more like the giggling woman he had watched nearly a month prior.

Things had changed, he had noticed her getting closer to Cody, and making slight friends in the locker room. "We're taking you out tonight," Jay announced, "For your birthday."

"No, you're not." Shay objected, crossing her arms over her chest. He could see the self-conscience in her, she was worrying about the scars. She'd be showing them off tonight, when she went to the ring, and he wondered what was going through her head.

"We haven't taken you out, and actually got you to have fun in a while." Jay said, "C'mon, Shay."

"I thought you wanted me to be careful?" Her eyebrow arched and he shrugged,

"Ah, but now you're going out with a bunch of wrestlers. How safer could you be?" She stood adamant by her decision and Jay rolled his eyes, muttering something about getting Chris to help him convince her.

A while later, Shay dismissed herself, "Promo," she stated, giving Jay a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"You know, it'd help if you picked your feet up when you walked!" Jay yelled as she slowly made her way down the hallway.

[On-Screen]

The Good Life by Three Days Grace blasted through the arena as Shay made her way onto the ramp, stable and confident, a smile growing on her face as she walked towards the ring. Slapping the fans' hands as she went, she made it up the steps without faltering. She was in her zone, her separate reality. Out here, there wasn't any stuttering, no clumsy falls or embarrassing moments of silence. She wasn't quite sure what it was, but all those things faded as soon as her music struck. Then, when she disappeared behind the curtain, it all eased back in.

Ducking under the ropes, she asked for a mike and returned to the center of the ring, "Wasn't that a fine, upstanding Diva's match?" She paused, grinning as she put a hand on her hip. "Ladies and gentlemen, let's give those two ladies a round of applause. Really, it was a very good match. Now, Beth, recently, it seems you're one of the only Divas I _haven't_ had the pleasure of facing, you and Natalya. That, however, is an entirely different matter altogether. You've been running your mouth about how you haven't had acceptable, or formidable opponents as of late. What I'm trying to say, Beth, is you, me, at Wrestlemania? Maybe not at Wrestlemania? I'm ready whenever you are. So, whenever you're ready for the match you've been asking for, give me a call." The crowd cheered, and she twirled the mike in her hand, "In fact, if any of you ladies back there want a fight, you know where to find me." Shay got out of the ring and returned up the ramp to her music. She passed Jay in the gorilla, smiling and waving as she made her way backstage.

[Off screen]

Beth and Nattie joined her as she walked down the hall, on her way towards the small segment she had to shoot. "What if it's a Triple Threat!" Nattie asked excitedly.

"Think about it! The Glamazon, The Anvilette, and The Ace of Harts..." Beth trailed off, her eyes glowing. Shay chuckled, nodding.

"That'd be something, wouldn't it?" She smiled as she came to the Women's Locker Room, "Hey, I'll catch you later. I-I have another segment."

"Alright." Both women nodded, disappearing into the room. Shay walked back down the hall, turning a corner and narrowly avoided clipping Victoria, technically Alicia, in the shoulder.

"Watch where you're going," her eyes narrowed at the blonde, "Slut."

Shay stopped, her arms crossed over her chest, "E-excuse me?"

"D-did I st-stu-stutter?" Victoria mocked, "C'mon, with the way you act, you must be getting passed around. You really expect people to believe you're not screwing one of you Canucks? Come _on_, Shay. We're not stupid. Which one is it?"

"I'm not _screwing_ any of them. I'm not even dating, Vi-" Shay sighed, wondering how Vince couldn't see that she didn't get along with half the Divas. This was why she spent half her time in John's locker room, or Adam's , or with any of the guys. The guys could be bad, but they never stooped as low as some of the women.

"I'm betting it's Chris. It has to be Chris, right? After all, that thing with you and John," Victoria smirked, shoving past Shay as the former walked away. Shay bit her lip, realizing she'd have to speak to Nick, to tell him to stop spreading whatever rumor he was spreading. Rather than ask her what was going on, it seemed that everyone was picking up on the rumor that she had cheated on John. She'd have to clear her name.

Then, she realized, people would start to wonder what the truth actually was. She leaned against the wall for support, why did it matter so much that people didn't know the truth? The car crash stemmed from it, would telling really screw everything up? Some people already knew the truth, and they didn't judge her for it, not that they let on. It would be easier not to tell, wouldn't it?

Yet, if the truth about her and John slipped out, wouldn't everything else come spilling out too? Nick, Dave, all her insecurities bottled up into one little decision; no, she couldn't tell. She'd ask Nick to just stop saying anything, not that he would listen, but it was worth the shot. Shutting her eyes, she felt the hot sting of tears shield her eyes. She felt a hand on her shoulder and she nearly jumped.

"Sorry," he murmured, and she could recognize his voice. Shay opened her eyes, meeting his.

"C-can I help you, Punk?" Shay asked, keeping her voice as stable as possible. She was staring into the face of one of the least judgmental people on the roster, from what she'd heard. He had also, however, been one of the people to play a part in bullying her, even if he didn't do much.

"You look like you need to talk."


	13. Keep Me In Mind

**Woohoo! Another chapter of Moth to a Flame! Wooot! How's everybody doing today? Anywho, I only own Shay and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors that may be found. And, in this chapter, there is some Shay/Cody. Psst, between you and me, there will be some drama coming up pretty soon. I'm finally caught up here and it's all good! Please leave a review, I absolutely love them and they make me happy and inspired. Please read, review, and enjoy.**

Kiwi

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><p>Shay pursed her lips and tapped her fingers on the smooth tabletop. Punk had whisked her away to a diner, not that she minded. The last thing she wanted was to be crammed into a dark club with thumping music and gyrating bodies of people she didn't know. Besides, this diner was nice, quiet, and she could think. Her mind flickered back to the words he spoke to her.<p>

_You look like you need to talk_

And so, she followed him to his rental, and he drove to a diner. Why she went with him was beyond her, she didn't really know him, much less talked to him. Yet, she didn't hesitate with leaving with him. Without much thought, she had pretty much blabbered her life story to people she hardly knew, left with a man she hardly knew, and was actually considering attending John's wedding. She shook her head, wondering just what was getting into her recently.

Punk gave a small smile. He didn't look nearly as rough as he did in the ring. Really, he looked nearly friendly, and had this been two years ago, she would've been questioning his every motive. And she was, sorta. She hadn't said a word yet, aside from muttering a small 'thank you' when he held the door open for her. The waitress came by, and she ordered. As the waitress walked away, he clicked his tongue.

"So, what's been going on?" Punk asked.

"Ph-Phil, with all due res-"

"Nah," he held up his hand to stop her, "call me Punk. I insist."

"Alright, _Punk_, why did you bring me here?"

"Why did you come with me?" He returned and she sighed, "You're asking why I brought you here? One, we're alone here. You're not being tailed by one of your lackeys. Two, you looked stressed, worried even. I dunno," Punk shrugged, smiling as he looked at her, "alone?" She glanced out the window, watching cars zoom by. It didn't make sense, he hadn't wanted anything to do with her before.

"I just had some things on my mind."

"If it makes you feel any better, I don't believe you slept with Chris," he lowered his voice and leaned in.

"Thanks," she was still dressed up, and she wished she had changed. Pulling her jacket tighter around her, she nodded.

"Tell me what's on your mind."

There it was. It was her chance. "I just need an opinion, that's all."

Punk laughed, "Opinions? Yeah, I got tons of them. What for?"

Her hands clasped together in her lap and twisted as she bit her lip, "I'm in a situation where I have no earthly idea wh-what I should do. I mean, if I tell the truth everything could fall apart. If I keep ignoring it, things fall apart."

"Well, if things are going to fall apart either way, what does it matter?" He paused, "This is a lot deeper than the whole Chris thing, isn't it? You're afraid? It's alright, just don't push things under the rug."

"Everyone's picking up on that stupid rumor, and it's not true. It just isn't. Nick's been giving me a hard time, nothing ever changes."

"This vague shit isn't helping either of us," he cut in. "I know you don't exactly trust me. I never gave you a reason to, but how can you expect people to give a damn, or be able to help you if you don't stop being so goddamn stubborn? Call it solving your own problems, you're so damn stubborn sometimes."

"You don't know a _damn_ thing," Shay frowned, "If I drag people into it, it'll make everything worse."

"Note, there's a difference between people being dragged into a situation, and people who volunteer to help out. Yeah, there are some things that need to be dealt with alone, but I don't think what you're going through is one of them. I'm just being honest, Shay. There are people who want to help you, and don't think you're dragging them into shit. I don't know you and I have no idea what goes on in that little head of yours," he stopped as she yawned. Sleep was still scarce for her, the nightmares were getting worse and they just wouldn't stop. She gripped the tabletop and the windowsill. Punk's eyebrows knit forward.

He noticed, she realized, "Relax, I'm just dizzy. It happens to everyone."

"But to a girl who collapsed earlier this month, you can see how some would be worried. Are you even taking care of yourself?" He asked, about to go on. Instead, he shook his head, "I'm sorry. So, are you going to the wedding?"

"Huh? John's wedding? Do I really have a choice? If I don't go, what will he, or anyone, think of me?"

"Who cares? That's the beauty in it. Go and show him you're better without him, or you can stay home, curl up on the couch and watch movies all day. You can do whatever you want, now that's my optimistic response. You want these rumors to stop? They'll either die out without you doing anything, or you can do something about it. You just can't be afraid of the outcome." She smiled a little, he did have a point. Her smile faltered, still unsure of what to do. "And whatever the outcome is, you'll still have people who care about you. Who gives a damn what everyone else thinks?"

Shay was about to reply when her phone rang. Excusing herself, she answered it. "Jay, I'm fine. Don't worry. I was having some hot chocolate, with Punk. R-relax, I'll be right over." She slid her phone back into her pocket and returned to the table. "I-I am so sorry, Punk. Jay called, and he needs to see me..." Punk held up a hand to silence her.

"It's fine. Shay?"

"Y-yes?"

"I'm going, to the wedding. The decision is yours, but I'd probably kill to see the look on John's face if you were to be there."

Shay smiled, "I'll keep that in mind."

**March 12****th****, 2012**

[On-screen]

Shay gripped the ring ropes, trying to steady herself. It was right in the middle of a match against one of the Bellas, Nikki, she remembered. A headache has struck her, sharp pains stabbing at her skull and the same dizziness caught her off-guard. The light stun her, and nausea was settling itno her stomach. They could see her stumbling, tripping as Nikki Irish-whipped her into the corner. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sheamus at the announcer's table.

**"Is Shay alright? She doesn't seem like herself tonight," Lawler stated, fiddling with a pen. "She's your girlfriend, isn't she, Sheamus?"**

** "She's a friend," he replied, "A good friend of mine." He focused back in on the match.**

** "It doesn't look good, though. She hasn't gotten much of a counter against Nikki," Cole cut in. "If Shay has any hope of winning this, she needs to get her head in the game."**

** "I'm pretty sure she does, yeh jus' need ta shut yer mouth," Sheamus gave Cole a pointed look. "She's a phenomenal performer, and she's faced tougher opponents than Nikki Bella."**

As Nikki ran towards her, Shay drove her knee into the brunette's stomach. With Nikki on her knees, she rebounded off the ropes and hit a scissor kick. Gripping Nikki's hair, she dragged her to her feet. She set her up for a gutwrench powerbomb and was about to lift her up. The ground swayed and she cleared her throat. Her shoulders tensed and her head pounded. Nikki slipped from her hold, shoving Shay back. Using the ropes as leverage, Nikkie clotheslined Shay. Shay looked up at her opponent, who was looking worried.

Kipping up, Shay lunged forward, locking in with Nikki.

"What the hell, Shay?" Nikki seethed, panting.

"I-I just...I'm dizzy," Shay gasped, blinking a few times as Nikki overpowered her. Snaking her hands into the blonde locks, Nikkie smirked and executed a sitout facebuster.

**"And there's the move the Bellas are known for!" Cole grinned, "Still think she's going to win?"**

** "Shut up, Cole. She looks hurt, disoriented," Lawler winced with each time the ref's hand slapped the mat. With a sigh, Lawler shook his head, "And it's over."**

Nikki's hand was raised and Nikki looked around, confused. Glancing down at Shay, who was being checked on by Sheamus, her eyes widened. Wiping the look from her face, she replaced it with a grin as her sister joined her in celebration.

[Off-Screen]

"God_dammit_," Shay leaned her forehead against the cool metal door. Stephen and Cody stood behind her. She was frantic, stuttering as she tried to catch her breath. He could sense her worry. She was supposed to have won. She was supposed to kick out, and she hadn't. "I-I have never done that poorly in a match." Shay winced, trying to shield her eyes from the hallway light.

"People have bad days all the time, it's alright," Cody said quietly, putting a hand on her lower back.

"It wasn't even a decimating match, I-I... what will Vince say? There's no way he'll let this slide," her voice quickened with pace and cursed under her breath. Shay was about to add on to that when Chris interrupted.

"Uh, Shay?"

"Yes?"

"Vince wants you in his office," he said slowly, shaking his head. Chris nodded towards Stephen, "You too." He stepped out of the way as Stephen passed, and put a hand on Shay's shoulder, "It'll be alright." She nodded, hoping he was right. Breaking off, she caught up with the redhead.

"Won't yeh jus' tell me what's wrong? It's obviously affectin' yer work now."

"Not. Now," she replied, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. They reached Vince's door, and she knocked on it. His greeting was strained, and as she opened the door, she could see his discontent. She took a seat, and Stephen sat next to her.

"I'm issuing a change in your storyline. Minor, but it'll take effect immediately. More her," he nodded at Shay, "than you. Shay-"

"I-I know, sir. I messed up."

"I know that. The question is why?"

"I-I was dizzy, and a headache. It isn't an excuse, I-I'm not trying to make excuses. It'll never happen again," she bit the inside of her lip as her fingers traced shapes into her wrestling gear. Shay glanced over at Stephen, who shrugged.

"I damn well hope so. You won't be wrestling for a while." His words cut the air and she snapped her eyes shut. "I'm sure you both knew what the plan was. Sheamus would win the WHC title at WrestleMania, and Shay would win the Diva's. You would've been an ultimate power couple. You're clearly unfit to wrestle, Shay." He folded his hands together. Stephen's jaw dropped, and she could feel his gaze on her.

It felt like she had been kicked in the stomach. Her shoulders tensed and she ran a hand through her hair, "I'm fine."

"If you were fine, you wouldn't have collapsed. Explain to me how I didn't know about that until two weeks ago? You were so disoriented, Shay, that you lost a match you were set to win. Do you understand what that sounds like? Instead, we'll have a Diva's tag match. You, you will be a valet, for Sheamus. You will also partake in ringside commentary. I'm sorry, Shay. I really am," Vince stated. "The romance, that'll continue. Probably be kicked up a notch. Shay, I want you to go back to the hotel, and rest."

"I-Is that all, Vince?" She had succeeded in keeping her voice stable and she tried to ignore the still raging pain inside her skull.

"Yes. But Shay, I know it's deeper than insomnia. You really need to pull yourself together. You'll be back in the ring when you're absolutely 100%, mentally and physically. You lied to me. When you can look yourself in the mirror, and honestly say that you're fine, we'll figure something out. Just focus on you for now. Hopefully removing you from matches will decrease your stress, maybe it'll help, I don't know. I hate having to take my top Superstars out of action, so just be lucky I'm going easy on you this time. Both of you are dismissed," he sighed, shaking his head as they left.

"Shay," Stephen turned to face her, "I'm so sorry."

"Why?" she scoffed, "Yo-you're not the one being shunted aside. Besides, maybe...maybe Vince has a point. I-I'm just going to go and get changed. I'll meet you in the gorilla for your match, alright?" She spoke quickly, trying to give herself some extra time. "I'm fine."

"I really don' want yeh out there, Shay," he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"Too bad," she crossed her arms over her chest. "I'll see you later."

"Dammit, Shay. You need all the rest you can get. Go back to the hotel, read a book, watch a movie, do _something_. Bein' here righ' now won' do yeh any good. Yeh heard what Vince said," Stephen countered.

Shay shook her head and frowned. "Fine," she muttered, bidding him farewell as she made her way back to the Diva's Locker Room. Getting redressed, she pulled her hair into a ponytail and put her gear back into her bag. Slinging it over her shoulder, she exited the locker room, and walked out to the parking lot.

"Shay!" She turned at the sound of her name, a smile breaching her face as Cody approached her. "What's up?"

"I, um, got sent back to the hotel tonight," she bit her lip, "And Vince is taking me out of matches."

"I'm sorry, really. Damn, that sucks. Why?" Cody asked, walking with her. He had his hands in his pockets, and stood close beside her as they walked.

"Eh, I haven't been doing too well lately, physically and mentally. He thinks I should focus on my health, so I'm a valet and commentator," she shrugged, "It's fine. Really, it sucks though. But, I'll get over it."

Cody murmured something under his lips as a grin spread across his face, "Go out with me," his smile faltered at the horrified look on her face. "Well, not a date. Not yet, anyway. I know, I know. You've been burned, but give me the benefit of a doubt." Cody shrugged, "Hell, you look hungry."

"Uh, I...um," she wasn't exactly sure how to respond. "Uh, yeah. I kind of am."

"Whattaya say we grab a bite to eat and go to the park? It's not a date, I promise." He grinned at her, a nearly pleading look in his eyes. Well, it wasn't a date. And he had been so kind to her, she reasoned as she contemplated it. Her stomach rumbled, and she looked at the ground before meeting his eyes.

"Sure."

Half an hour later, she sat on top of a picnic table, legs crossed and a sub wrapper in hand. Cody sat next to her, and from where they sat, they had a clear view of the moon hovering over the lake. "I'm not sure what's left to ask you, you pretty much blurted it all in a bar a couple of months ago," he laughed dryly, and she smiled.

"Yeah, I don't know why I did that. Impulse, really," she stated. It really was a beautiful night. The stars were twinkling, shining as if they didn't have a care in the world. Glancing over at him, she saw him slide closer to her. "I barely knew you then."

"Well, it's a good thing you don't barely know me anymore," he whispered, "Shay, can I tell you something?"

"Of course."

"I won't force you to do anything. I mean," he said as his eyes met hers. Smiling, he reached out and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, "We don't even have to talk right now, if you don't want to. We can just stay silent, if that's what you want."

Shay smiled, "Cody, you're a chatterbox."

He shrugged, "If it's what you wanted, I'd figure out a way to make it happen." There were a few beats of silence, "And Shay, I know you're not ready for a relationship, but I feel this insane attraction to you. I think we'd be pretty damn perfect together, so, whenever you're ready, keep me in mind." Shay gnawed her lip, raking a hand through her hair. He smiled at her again, and she could feel her willpower unraveling. Something in his voice was alluring, promising, as if it was strictly made for getting people to do what he wanted.

Cody was attractive, that she would admit. A part of her was delighted by the idea of romance, the other part was more realistic though. And, she had made a promise that she wouldn't date a co-worker. Parts of her were certain it'd flop, and that she'd either be unable to add to the relationship, thus hurting him; or, she'd be the one getting burned... again. She studied him for a moment, searching for the slightest trace of hidden emotion in his eyes. He was either very good at hiding it, or he was being sincere. Sucking in a breath, she tried to calm her mind.

"Alright."


	14. Revelations and Expectations

**So, here's another chapter of Moth to a Flame, and I'm glad you tuned in for this one. I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. I only own Shay, and this chapter is kinda important. A lot happens, revelations are made and drama. Oooo, oodles of it is starting, and that will bring all the fun. **

**And today I had my District meet for Forensics. We had to be up uber early, we left the school at 5:30 in the morning and it was a marvelous time. Oi, my friend and I are going to State! April 20th, and it'll come quicker than I think. Anywho...**

**REVIEW! Bitte, please, Review! Writers love reviews. Alrighty, please read, review, and enjoy.**

**Kiwi**

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><p>Shay sighed, wrapping her arms around her midsection as she followed Jay backstage. "Is everything alright?" She asked, stopping in front of the door to the Men's Locker Room. He seemed on edge, moreso than earlier. Jay shook his head, a dry chuckle escaping his throat.<p>

"Yeah, Shay. Everything's fine," he turned to face her. "Heard about what Vince said. It's a shame."

Shay scoffed, "A-Alright."

"What are you talking about?" Jay asked and Shay shrugged.

"It's just, you never wanted me to return in the first place. You're probably overjoyed that I'm practically sidelined again."

"Shay," his tone was sharp, "I never wanted you not to return. I just thought it was too soon, and I was right. You can't deny that now, Shay. Monday was _proof_. Your leg may be better, but the rest of you isn't. Why did you lie to me? Huh? I thought we crossed that bridge a long-ass time ago." Jay dragged a hand through his hair.

"Jay, I am fine."

"When will you understand that I'm not stupid, Shay? I know you're not alright. I don't believe you when you say you're fine, because you're usually not." Jay said quietly, putting a hand on her arm. "That's what you do. You hide, and you wait for it to blow over. What if we weren't there, Shay? You'd still be with Dave, or you wouldn't be here. You need to stop hiding, and start facing things. What were you gaining by telling us not to worry? What did we gain? We worried about you, Shay. I watched you fall apart, Adam watched you fall apart, and we couldn't put you back together again because you hid the pieces," Jay released a breath and ran a hand over his face. "I didn't come back here to yell at you. I just thought things would be different."

"Different?" Her eyebrow rose. "No, things aren't different. I'm sorry to disappoint. And, if it makes you feel better, I'm just as messed up as I was before," Shay threw her hands up in exasperation. "Why do we always end up fighting? We've never fought like this before."

"I'm...I'm just afraid of losing you, alright?" The alarm in his voice made her jump. "You're like this tiny porcelain doll that I'm afraid will break if anyone gets close to it. We were so damn close to losing you before, and..." Jay hesitated, shoulders tensing as he spoke. "I'm afraid that every day could be your last, I'm afraid that one day I'll wake up and you won't be there because you let everyone else's happiness get in the way of your own safety. The car accident with John, Shay? You knew we wouldn't have wanted you to go, but he wanted to see you even though you knew it would be risky."

"Uh, no, actually. I-I didn't know, I thought he just wanted to talk," Shay replied, shaking her head. "I just... I didn't know you felt like that." Her voice was soft, barely rising above a whisper. "I'm sorry, Jay."

A sigh passed his lips and his hand dropped, "Don't apologize. I have to go, Shay. I'll... I'll catch up with you later, okay?"

"Okay," Shay said, giving him a quick hug before he took off down the hall. She inhaled sharply, letting the breath out slowly as she walked down the hall. Jay and her had been... not seeing eye-to-eye lately, and she thought his injury would've put things at ease. Nope. He came back, and he still was pointing out how she was being reckless, and how she was worrying him. Now, she realized, he was right.

Turning the corner, she saw Chris talking with Nick. Retreating, she listened in.

"You tell her, or I will," Nick's voice cut through the air, and she winced involuntarily.

"No. She doesn't need to know, Nick. And if you keep trying to make her life hell, I'll make your life hell," Chris replied, anger residing in his voice, anxiety subtly edging the words.

Nick laughed, "I made her life hell? Alright, I'll admit to that one. But I didn't let my feelings get in the way. I didn't tell her my undying love for her, or entice her petty boyfriend to mistrust her. You just couldn't stand it, now could you? Knowing the love of your life was happier with someone else. Sucked, didn't it? I know what sucks more..." He was about to continue when Chris cut him off.

"Shut your mouth, Nick," Chris's voice hardened as it lowered.

"She wouldn't have been in that car accident, had it not been for you. You still blame yourself, every day. You put off coming back. You knew you'd see her, and see how hopeless she was. You'd see how broken, and shattered, and destroyed that accident made her. You'd see the aftermath of three little words. Is it what you expected? You thought she should blame you. She didn't though, and that's what confused you."

Shay swallowed, her mind flashing back to that night. She heard those words leave his mouth, and she had replied honestly. He told her he loved her, and she told him the same. Then, he elaborated, stretching it, admitting he had fallen in love with her. And she, she just couldn't reciprocate that. It shattered her, to break his heart. She didn't think he was the one to blame, she never did.

"Shut up. You hurt her more than I ever did," Chris snapped, and she peeked around the corner to see Chris push Nick's shoulder. Great, she crossed her arms over her chest. They were going to get into a fight.

"But you weren't there for her then, not entirely. Not like Adam and Jay. They were always the closest to her, and you hated that, didn't you? You hated that no matter how hard you tried, you never matched up to them, or John. Yeah, she loves you, just not the way you wanted her to. You couldn't change her mind and it _killed_ you inside," Nick's voice was sharp, precise, and Chris shook his head.

"Chris!" Shay plastered a smile on her face as she came out from behind her corner, "I-I have to tell you something." Okay, so that was a lie. She just didn't want them to get into a fight.

"Shay," Chris mustered up a smile, sending a warning glance towards Nick, who smirked.

"Shay, Shay, Shay," Nick laughed, "Just the person I was looking for."

"Nick." Chris growled under his breath. "Don't."

"She deserves to know," Nick tsked, his smirk growing at Shay's confusion.

"K-know what?" She asked, genuinely curious. "Chris?"

Chris sighed, running a hand over his face and back through his hair. He sucked in a breath and shook his head, "It's nothing. Don't worry about it." Her eyebrow rose and she crossed her arms over her chest. "Really, Shay."

"No, it's not. You thought I was a liar, he's ten times worse. He doesn't want to be at fault for something," Nick said, coming closer to her. On instinct, her arm slid around Chris's, and she clung to him, as if on defense. "Why don't you tell her, Chris? Seeing as you think it's your right to tell."

"Tell me what? Chris?" She asked again, seeing his shoulders tense. Shay could feel it, hear it as he tried to calm his breathing.

"Nothing." He was adamant.

"You're really going to keep her in the dark, Chris?"

"Dammit, Chris," Shay began, turning to face him, "Tell me already."

"I can't. I just... I can't," Chris sent another look towards Nick, who just shrugged and shook his head. The other blond opened his mouth, mocking Chris as he stepped forward. "Please, Nick."

"Sorry, Chris. I can't let you stay afloat. Shay, there's something you didn't know about Chris. Chris here, he hated John more than you think. Well, maybe not hated him, just the thought of you being with him. Did you know," he directed the words towards Shay, who had dropped Chris's arm as Nick approached, "that your precious Chris tried to sabotage your relationship with John?"

"What?" It was the only word that came to her mind. It was Nick's statement, she didn't believe it, but it was probable. She just didn't want it to be. How could he have done that, why would he sink to such a low? Nick was notorious for telling lies, particularly ones about her. This was just another one of them, she hoped. "I-I don't believe you."

"Naturally," Nick snorted, "and I don't blame you. But, it's the truth, Shay. He was jealous, he wanted you all to himself, so he came to me one day and he asked me to help him out. Oh, this is the interesting part, Dave helped. Yeah, you heard that right. He came to not only me, but _Dave_." Nick's triumphant smirk broadened, if that was possible. Her heartbeat quickened, as if panic were setting in. Why should it? This was just another lie, just another attempt to cut her down as he always had. It was the thought of it that got her. The mere thought of Chris working with the both of them against her was sickening.

She glanced up at Chris, who had moved away from her, his head hung low as he rubbed the back of his neck. He looked at her, and she saw it in his eyes. They were glistening, a silent apology as he cursed under his breath. "Ch-Chris?" Her breath was short, her heart thudding beneath her ribcage. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Nick slip away.

"He's..." Chris trailed off, shaking his head, "I'm sorry, Shay."

Words caught in her throat, choking and constricting her as she stared at Chris. This couldn't be true, it just couldn't. She could feel the hot tears building up, but she blinked them away. This wasn't something to cry over.

"You're serious?" Her gaze hardened, "You seriously tried to sabotage my relationship?" Sucking in a breath, Chris nodded, reaching out to her. She retracted, shaking her head. "Why, Chris?"

"I just... I don't know. I... I didn't go through with it. I wanted to, but I just couldn't. I wanted you, but I saw how happy you were with John, Shay. I didn't go through with it," his words were rushed, and Shay shook her head.

"I can't believe you,"she tugged a hand through her hair, trying to make sense of things. Right now, she just couldn't. He had betrayed her, and right now, whether or not he went through with it wasn't important. He had tried to take her happiness away, and in a twisted way, he had. Maybe it wasn't just that he channeled that much hate, and that much selfishness into her life. The fact that he had teamed up with Nick and Dave was just as troubling. She flinched, shoulders shaking as she bit the inside of her lip.

"I'm sorry," his voice was faint, lacking the luster and charm it usually did. Now, he looked almost as weak as she felt. "Shay, it wasn't a good idea. I just... I loved you so freaking much, Shay. I couldn't let you slip away. It was selfish, and I'm sorry." He apologized over and over, trying to explain.

"Sorry doesn't fix what you did. You tried to steal me away from him."

"What did you expect me to do, Shay! I loved you and he wasn't right for you. He just wasn't. He was so California, and he was just this silly little romantic dream you had, Shay. He wasn't right for you. He just... I couldn't see you two together," Chris stated, and she felt her jaw drop.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She whispered.

"He was perfect, he did everything and anything. He was this sun that just illuminated your entire world when it was dark, and I wanted to be him. I wanted to be in his place so badly, I wasn't thinking straight. I thought I could get away with it. At first, at first I wanted you to break up, at any means necessary. Then, I couldn't live with the thought of me destroying your happiness...I'm sorry," Chris reiterated and Shay's gaze hardened. She saw him wince, opening his mouth to speak again.

"I'll see you later, Chris," She started off in the other direction.

"Shay, c'mon, Shay!"

"I need time to think, Chris." Her voice hardened, "Alright?" She swallowed the quaver that was beckoning to come out. The thought of him going to that extent was troubling. Did it really matter if he did go through with whatever plan they had? He had tried to ruin the one sure thing she thought she had. The thought that he wanted to take it all way hurt, it struck her and it stung.

She drove back to the hotel and retreated into her room. Well, it wasn't exactly hers. Stephen was pacing back and forth, and she nearly bumped into him on her way to the bed. Shay muttered an apology, dropping her bags down and sitting on the bed. Resting her head in her hand, she watched him pace. He was shirtless, dressed in sweatpants and apparently restless. He barely stopped when she entered, and had apologized when she narrowly avoided him.

Shay was going to speak, ask him what was wrong, but she thought better of it. She already had an idea of what was bothering him. And, she figured he would talk if he wanted to. Although, she would've given anything for a conversation. She wanted something to take her mind off of what Chris had just revealed to her.

"Are yeh tryin' to undress me with yer eyes? A simple question woulda been easier."

She felt her cheeks grow hot and she shook her head, "You aren't wearing much to begin with."

"Would it help if Ah stand still?" He smiled, and she reacted with a smile. Stephen turned again, and she caught glimpse of the scratch on his back. Frowning, she sighed.

"Is it still bleeding?"

"Tha', yeah. Kinda re-opened in my match." He shrugged, "I'm fine."

"You look stressed."

"I am," he moved to sit on the bed opposite of her, "Yeh okay?"

"I asked you first," she stated, pivoting to face him. "So, spill."

"She keeps callin' me, an' he does too." She winced as he spoke, knowing exactly what he meant. "It sounds stupid, but the whole thin' is stressin'. An' WrestleMania's comin' up. I don' want to have tha' on my mind when I should be focusin' on my match, yeh know?" Shay nodded, murmuring under her breath as she returned her focus to him. It was strange, she'd admit, seeing him looking almost vulnerable.

"Just ignore it," she shrugged.

"It's just, I don' think I can. Would yeh be able to ignore it if John called yeh relentlessly?" Stephen asked, and she shook her head, knowing it would probably get to her eventually.

"Change your number? I don't know," she added, laying down. The bed felt cold, and unwelcoming. She'd much rather be at home, than here. Looking at him, she saw him shake his head.

"Nah, couldn' do that."

"Then stop complaining, if you don't plan on doing anything about it. That is one of my biggest pet peeves," Shay retorted, stretching her back. He laughed, smirking as his eyes settled on her.

"Tha', tha' was a good one. Why don't you?"

"I actually will."

"Are yeh actually being serious, yer tellin' the truth?" She nodded, and he continued, "Jus' like yeh said yeh were fine, an' I ended up spendin' the nigh' with yeh." He stated, hunching forward and resting his forearms across his knees. For a moment, silence followed, and she thought he was done. Then, his voice cut through the silence, softer this time, more exasperated than he had been before. "Shay, I've been thinkin', an'...I was wonderin'... Are yeh, comfortable around me?" Stephen cleared his throat, studying her and gauging her reaction. She shrugged.

"I-I guess. Why?"

Stephen sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We have to kiss at WrestleMania, an' I don' wanna make yeh uncomfortable." Shay sat up, watching him as he got up again and continued his pacing. "I mean, I could talk to Vince, if it'd help. If I make yeh uncomfortable."

"You're fine, Stephen. I'll be fine with the kiss," Shay replied, her eyebrow arching as he mumbled something under his breath. "What made you think of this anyway?"

"Barely two weeks away, an' I was thinkin' about yeh, and what yeh said. Yeh told me yeh were most comfortable 'round Adam, an' Jay, an' Chris... an' I jus' thought that since yeh acted different dependin' on who yeh were around..." he trailed off, "I jus' thought I made yeh uncomfortable."

"It's fine, Stephen," Standing, she walked over to him. "I appreciate you asking, but, trust me... It's fine." She smiled, patting his chest. "Why are you so worried over this? It's just a kiss. I barely even remembered until you brought it up." She shrugged.

"Promise not to laugh at me?"

"Sure."

"I'm worried that I won't be what you expected." He sighed and she bit her lip, but not in time to stop the chuckle. His eyes narrowed, "Don't laugh."

"I-I'm sorry, I just didn't expect that. You just seemed like the kind of person who wouldn't mind it, per se. What did you think I'd expect?" She questioned, suddenly intrigued by this. He took in a breath and released it, rolling his shoulders as he cleared his throat.

"That'd I'd be someone who'd have no problem kissin' a woman on live television. An' maybe it's not that. I knew yeh didn' wanna be in a romantic storyline, an' I feel like it's not fair to yeh," Stephen shrugged, "Yeh know?"

"Yeah," she murmured, absentmindedly sidling up to him. She could feel the heat of his skin against her own, "I know." She wasn't sure why she was doing this, and she knew she wouldn't be so close to him had he been practically anyone else. It was something about him, whether it was his vernacular, his mere presence, whatever... something made her feel different. "Besides," she whispered, "It'll just be one, chaste kiss. Nothing to worry about. Unless, of course, you're worried that once you start, you won't be able to stop," Inside, her head was screaming, cursing her and wondering what the hell she had just said, and to whom she had just said it to. She saw his eyebrow raise, and she leaned up, kissing his cheek. "Chaste."

He opened his mouth, but his words didn't escape. She pulled away, moving toward the bed. "W-what... yeh were angry when yeh came in."

Ah, she should've known he'd address it sooner or later. Grabbing her pajamas, she asked him to give her a moment, and went into the bathroom. She returned shortly and slid into the bed. He followed suit, and she sighed. All the anger came rushing back, all the hurt and confusion were stinging and stabbing at her. Some of her wanted to keep it locked under key, like everything else. The other wanted to tell, to get it off her chest while it was still fresh and her mind was still reeling. She wanted to think about it, go over it thoroughly, and he was there. He wanted to listen. And she was starting to value his opinion.

"C-can we... Can we talk about this later, Stephen? I-I promise. I just want to think it over for a while. I just... I-I just got some upsetting news, that's all."

He looked a little miffed, but she figured he'd have to get over it. Although, he did seem pleased that she had promised to talk about it. "Whenever yer ready," he murmured, turning over on his side. She nodded, despite knowing he couldn't see her. She drew a breath, wondering just what it was about him that made her act the way she did.


	15. Chaste

**Alright, long chapter, but bear with me. I apologize for any spelling and grammatical errors. I only own Shay, and I love all of you, lol. Seriously, you are my motivators. :) Please read, review, and enjoy.**

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><p>"I-I need a dress," she stated suddenly, looking up at him. His eyebrow rose as he returned her gaze. "For the Hall of Fame Ceremony."<p>

"It's Saturday, and yeh haven't found a dress yet?" He laughed, shaking his head. "Shay, Shay, Shay. Wha' are we gonna do with yeh?"

Shay shrugged, "I don't know, sell me on Ebay?" Stephen laughed again, stifling it as he took a turn. It was midday, and they were driving to the RAW show. Stephen drove, she took up the passenger seat, and Cody, PJ, and Heath were in the back. They seemed to be sleeping, at least they were when Shay last checked. "D-do you want me to drive?"

"I'm fine," he replied. "I've noticed yeh an' Jay aren' talkin'. Same with Chris." Stephen sent a small glance towards her and a sigh passed her lips.

"Yeah, we just... got into an argument," Shay shrugged, "it's nothing." His phone rang, and she rolled her eyes. "If that thing rings one more time, _I'm_ going to answer it."

"I'd like to see that happen," he shook his head.

"What? You don't think I have the guts to answer your crazy ex?" She asked, pulling her hair into a ponytail. "I do. That was the seventh time today, Stephen. I don't think she's taking the hint." Shay replied.

"Are we there yet?" A groggy voice asked from behind.

"About three more hours," Shay and Stephen replied in unison. Heath muttered something before slouching back in his seat. As soon as he was snoring again, Shay chuckled.

"Do they always sleep this much?"

"Nah," he said, "So, what was that argument about?"

"Still nervous about that kiss?" She countered, ignoring his question.

"What kind o' dress are yeh lookin' for?" Alright, he reasoned, if she was ignoring his questions, he'd ignore hers. She caught on and shrugged. Plucking her iPod from her pocket, she put in her earbuds and turned up the volume, focusing her attention out the window.

Three hours later, they were pulling into the hotel parking lot. Stephen got out of the car, followed by Shay and the guys. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Cody taking Shay's suitcase and bag out of the trunk. She reached for them, but he stopped her, opting to carry them for her. At first, she protested, but, seeing how adamant he was about it, she let him. Cody walked in front of her as she hung around to talk with PJ and Heath.

Stephen stood at the door, holding it open as they filed in. He watched as Shay thanked Cody, hugging him and pecking him on the cheek. He rolled his eyes and shut the door behind him. Going to stand behind PJ, he ran a hand through his hair. Once they had received their keys, they were on their way to the elevator.

A voice called out, attracting his attention, even though it wasn't his name that was called.

"Shay!" The voice called again, and he noticed Shay's eyes lit up, and she hadn't even turned around yet. Grinning, she spun around and ran towards the voice, jumping into the man's arms as he spun her around.

"Adam!" She squealed, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. Stephen smiled, remembering that she said her and Adam were the closest. And now, they were reunited. Adam's arms tightened around her waist as he set her down. "Adam," she repeated, softer this time. "You're here. I-I wasn't expecting to see you until Saturday."

"Eh, what can I say, I wanted to be here early," he gestured for a moment and she took a step back. "It's good to see you, Shay. Randy's been calling me, to uh..." Adam trailed off and she rolled her eyes.

"He's been a watchdog, Adam. Just like you asked him to."

"I asked him to be there for you. Not a watchdog," Adam replied, eyebrow raising as he looked past her and towards the group behind her. "Making friends?" He held up a hand to the others, and the guys nodded, waving back. "Stephen seems to like you, aw, and Cody's looking at you too." Adam chuckled, shoving his hands into his pockets. "What have you been up to?"

"Nothing much," she shrugged. "I-I'm walking you out on Saturday, right?" He nodded and she let out a small sound. "Alright."

"So, what are you wearing on Saturday? So I can match myself to you," Adam asked, and Shay's eyes widened, murmuring under her breath.

"I-I haven't found anything yet," she replied and he laughed, shaking his head. Smacking his shoulder, she grinned, "I just... it slipped my mind."

"I have an idea."

"No... Adam, every time you get an idea.." she trailed off, trying to grab his wrist as he slid past her.

"You, you, you, and you," he pointed to PJ, Heath, Cody, and Stephen before throwing his thumb over his shoulder, "Are coming with Shay Butter and I." Shay stood beside him, sending him a look.

"Adam," his name slipped her lips through gritted teeth. "Don't you dare." Adam grinned, slinging an arm across her shoulders.

"Put your bags in your room, and meet us here in half an hour," Adam instructed as he turned towards Shay. Stephen nodded and started towards the elevator, the rest of the guys trailing after. As soon as they left, Adam led Shay into the small cafe attached to the lobby. Sitting across from her, he smiled. "It's good to see you, Shay."

"I missed you, Adam," Shay murmured, tucking hair behind her ear. "I...it's been difficult lately."

"I've heard. Jay called me, he's..."

"Worried, I know," Shay tapped the table, shaking her head.

"And what's with your storyline? Are you doing okay on Smackdown? I mean, aside from being taken out of action. Mentally, physically... how are you doing. And don't lie to me either, Shay," Adam added.

"Trust me, nothing is going on between Stephen and I, same with Cody. As for Smackdown..." Shay trailed off, "I'm making friends. Isn't that enough? My leg hurts sometimes, and I haven't been sleeping well at all. I'm worried, I'm scared, and I don't think I can handle this alone. But, every single time I try to get help it blows up in my face. I don't think I can handle this at all." His hand rested on hers and he offered her a reassuring smile.

"You will."

Her own lips twitched into a small smile. Shaking her head, she bit her lip, "How could you possibly know that, Adam?"

"You always do, Shay, even if it is subconsciously. Even if it doesn't seem like you are, you're a fighter. You just can't be afraid to ask for help, alright?"

"Alright," she smiled and looked over, seeing that the guys had returned, "Time to go," Shay stood, joining them with Adam following her.

Thirty minutes later, she stood with her arms crossed over her chest, contemplating whether or not she should leave the dressing room. This was the umpteenth dress Adam threw at her. Well, it started with Adam, and gradually Cody joined in with tossing dresses at her. Sucking in a breath, she left the dressing room and stood in front of them. "Well?" Shay said, sighing as she planted her hands on her hips.

"What do you think? You're the one wearing it," Adam chuckled.

"Oh no. You do not drag me, and a bunch of my friends out to some boutique _just_ to pull that Jedi-Mind Trick. This is why women shop with women."

"You've gone shopping with the Divas?" Heath laughed, shaking his head as he rested his elbow on a shelf.

"Somebody has to," Shay shrugged "I-I mean, not really. They never invited me along..." Shay trailed off.

"It's kinda short," PJ shrugged, smiling. "It looks nice though-" The words barely left his lips before Shay threw her hands up.

"That's what I was thinking! I-I mean, I couldn't even bend over in this thing," she tugged at the hemline. Stephen stood, holding up a hand as he disappeared into the boutique. Adam got up, following the redhead and Shay plopped down between PJ and Heath. "Now what are they doing?"

"You alright?" Cody chuckled, eyebrow raising. She nodded, folding her hands in her lap.

Stephen turned, and was met with Adam. "Adam."

"I figured you'd want to talk to me," Adam stated, looking over his shoulder to make sure Shay was out of earshot. "John was the same way. He got in a storyline with her, and was intrigued by her. I don't blame you, and I'll answer what I can."

"Why did she an' John break up?"

Adam took in a breath, "Wow, jumping right to it?" He shook his head, "_That_ I can't tell you. Her relationships, or, how they ended, are off limits. That is Shay's responsibility. She'll tell you when she wants to, just wait."

"She's not well, Adam."

"That doesn't make it my story to tell, Stephen. Just... it's Shay, Stephen. I know, I know, the mystery is killing you, but you'll get over it. It's not that great of a story, and when you do hear it, you'll wish she never told you. Anything else?" Adam asked, rifling through a rack of dresses. "You and Shay getting along well?"

Stephen shrugged, "Probably as well as we ever will. She's difficult, kinda sparky."

Adam chuckled, "You're a hothead, Stephen. And she's feeding off of that. She probably enjoys that someone calls her on her bullshit. John, well... he was soft when it came to her. I just think she needs someone to show her that she doesn't have to be handled like porcelain. She needs someone to relate to, someone to... push her a little bit when necessary."

"If yer tryin' to recruit me..."

"No, I'm not recruiting you. This one," he smirked, "This one I'll let grow on its own." He put his hands in his pockets and hummed a tune under his breath. "I'm going to go back, so they don't start thinking we got lost." Adam peeked over Stephen's shoulder at the dress, "Oh, yeah. Good choice." He turned away and started off, "She looks good in blue."

_**Saturday, March 31**__**st**__**, 2012**_

Shay twirled around in front of the mirror set up in the locker room. A grin spread across her face and she put her hands on her hips. Nattie sidled up next to her.

"You look gorgeous."

"Thanks," she took a seat and slipped on a pair of silver heels. The dress was the one Stephen picked out. It was dark blue, and strapless with a simple bodice that faded into a sweeping skirt. It felt light on her, easy and free. A light blue ribbon tied around her waist, a contrast to the navy of the dress It just... it felt right, and she would have to thank him later for finding it. A while later, she was in the car with Nattie, Layla, Kaitlyn, and AJ on the way to the ceremony.

"So, how's everybody doing?" Nattie smiled, nudging Shay. "How's Cody?"

"C-Cody's fine, Nat," Shay replied, "Nothing's happening between us anyway. Not yet."

"Yet!" Nattie grinned, "You said yet. You two would be adorable together."

"He asked me to keep him in mind if I ever decided to start dating again, and I told him I would," Shay shrugged. "It's not a big deal."

/

Stephen stood outside the arena, patiently waiting for Shay. He whistled a tune as he moved to stand with Punk, Mike, Maryse, and Ron. They greeted him, and he nodded in return, adjusting his blazer. He was eager to see the blonde, to see what she looked like all 'dolled up'.

"You waiting for Shay?" Ron asked, and he nodded. Maryse cooed.

"That is so sweet," she put an arm around Mike's waist. "How is she doing, Mike?" Mike looked away and shrugged.

"I, uh... rarely talk to her anymore."

"You two used to hang out a lot when she was dating John," Maryse added and he just shrugged again. Stephen shook his head, ushering them to go in, and that he'd catch up with them later. Ron, Maryse, and Mike went, leaving him with Punk. He expected Punk to ask him questions, but the Chicago native stayed silent. A few minutes later, a car pulled up and a few of the Divas poured out, one being Shay. Stephen smiled as she came into view and she soon stood in front of him. She bit her lip, shifting from foot to foot.

"You look great, Shay," Punk stated, giving her a quick hug. Checking his watch, he waved. "I'm going to go in now, I'll see you all in a few." Punk briskly went off and Shay chuckled.

"He was eager to leave." Her hair was done in a low, side ponytail and her bangs were swept to the side. He looked her over, realizing that she had chosen the dress he picked out. It was, enlightening, in a way. As childish as it sounded, he was just glad she didn't pick something Cody presented. She turned her attention back to him.

"Yeh look beautiful, Shay."

"L-Likewise," she spoke, and her eyes widened, "I... uh, you...you know what I meant."

"Yeah," he smiled, offering his arm, "I did. Now, Miss Hart," he started as they began walking towards the arena doors, "Will yeh do me the honor o' sittin' with me." She nodded, and he led her to the seats. Digging into his pocket, he handed her a small plastic pack of tissues.

"Thanks," she murmured. "So, how was Make-A-Wish?"

"Great, the kids were fantastic. Great day," he elaborated and she smiled, nodding along as he spoke. Stephen saw her attention flicker over his shoulder. Pivoting, he tried to find the face she saw, but couldn't pinpoint it. Shay swallowed hard, nearly flinching as her eyes widened. "Shay? Who're yeh looking at?"

"N-no one," she shook her head, resting her hand over his. "Continue." His eyebrow rose, he didn't believe her, but decided not to push it. He knew she'd be emotional tonight, and he reasoned that she wouldn't need him being an ass on top of it all. Stephen kept an eye on her throughout the ceremony, watching her smile and nod with each inductee. For a moment, he wondered what she'd be like when Adam was inducted.

His eyes fell on her, and he fidgeted in his seat. His hands were on his knees, and he glanced away every time she became aware, or suspicious, of his gaze. Smiling, he took in her appearance, the radiance that seemed to shine through, more than likely due to the fact that Jay was on stage; the curve of her lips. The lips he'd be kissing tomorrow. He wondered what she'd taste like, and for some reason, he imagined strawberries, or butterscotch.

After the ceremony, he followed her backstage, to where Adam met her with open arms. She grinned, running a hand through the cropped blond locks. "You cut your hair."

Adam nodded, brushing away her tears. "Yeah, Shay. Hey, I can't stay for long, there's a few things they need me for. But..."

"Adam," her hand rested on the Canadian's forearm. "H-he's here."

"He, as in..." he trailed off as his eyes met hers. "Dammit. Seriously? He won't bug you though, I'm sure he won't. I mean, after last time." The vagueness of their conversation was intriguing, and Stephen leaned against the wall, hoping to pick up on it.

"I-I know, but... you know how he is," she stated, her voice barely above a whisper. Stephen sighed, shaking his head, wondering what was worrying her so much, and why Adam's eyes flashed with fear. Adam stood silent for a moment, looking into Shay's eyes, as if unsure of what to say to her. Adam looked towards him.

"Stephen, can you take Shay back to the hotel?" Adam asked, almost pleading. "Please?" He nodded, walking with her down the hall. Her exterior had crumbled, and she was shaking slightly.

"Shay..." he began, but decided to leave it in silence, unless she spoke first. "Never mind." She stayed quiet though, slightly in front of him as they walked down the hall. Rounding the corner, she squealed, having bumped into someone. Muttering an apology, she tried to move around them, but the man grabbed her wrist and pulled her back in front of him. Stephen stopped, Bryan had started talking to him. His eyebrows knitting together as the scene unraveled before him.

"I-I'm sorry," Shay muttered, "I wasn't looking."

"Nothing new."

Shay winced, the man's voice cutting down into her head. "Let go of me, Dave."

"Why should I?" Dave smirked. "You look hot tonight, except those ugly scars of yours." His thumb traced the one down her jaw. "C'mon, one more time. For old time's sake?"

"How about no?" She offered, yanking her arm free of his grip. Anger swam in his eyes, and she wasn't sure why she wasn't flinching, or bending beneath his will like she used to.

"And why not?"

"Same reason as before, Dave. I'm not that... _low_ anymore. I'm not afraid you'll jeopardize my career, or my life." She added, hands on her hips as she stepped away from Dave. That was a risk, and she knew it. If it was possible, Dave looked angrier and she nearly flinched, knowing deep in her heart that he still frightened her, and his imprint on her life was going to stay with her forever. "So you can go off, a-and you can..." His hand gripped her arm again, harder than before and he sneered as he leaned in closer to her.

"You stupid bitch. I know how low you've fallen. Precious little Hart has had her fall from grace. How's John treating you? Or is he too caught up in a real woman to be fretting over a petty girl? You're not steady on your feet, and you'll fall just like every other time, Shay," Dave growled. He was playing his mind games again, and she was just glad they weren't really alone. She glanced around, looking for an escape, but finding none. Stephen was with Bryan, it would only be a matter of time before they looked up. His words, they stung, and he avoided his gaze. "Where're your guts now, Shay? You never had them."

She hear footsteps approaching, and the presence of two men behind her. "Is there a problem, Batista?"

Dave dropped her arm, rolling his shoulders. He never did push farther when she was surrounded. "No, Danielson, there isn't," he licked his lips. "Have a nice night." He brushed by them, bumping Shay's shoulder as he went and she pinched the bridge of her nose. Tears were on the brink of falling, and she nodded towards Stephen and Bryan.

"Th-tha...thank you," she murmured as Bryan put a hand on her shoulder. She flinched involuntarily, muttering an apology. "I-I...just...I am so sorry." Bryan chuckled nervously.

"Dont... don't apologize. What are you apologizing for?" Shay shrugged, her shoulders shaking as they walked outside. "What was that all about anyway?"

"Nothing. Nothing. I'm not going to add so much stress before your match tomorrow. I'm just going to head back to the hotel, and sleep." Stephen's eyebrow shot up and Bryan gave her a look. "I-If you two are going to be worse than Jay..." she trailed off, shaking her head. "Dave is just difficult."

They nodded, and she could tell they didn't believe her. Stephen walked with her to the car, and drove her back to the hotel. The rest of the night was spent in silence, and she had the worst night of sleep she could remember that night.

_/_

Stephen stood in catering with Shay by his side. She had been by his side all day, partially due to the storyline, their somewhat friendship, and the fact that Adam had called him earlier that morning. He would've done it anyway. She was particularly quiet today, and he made it a point not to bring it up. It would've spun a bad mood in her, and that was hardly fair, especially since their storyline was coming to a peak tonight.

"Shay!" She turned at the sound of her name, smiling weakily when Bryan approached. His smiles faded at the dry and tired look on her face. "You alright?"

"Yeah, I just... I had a run in with Dave..." Shay trailed off, seeing the confusion in his eyes. "Rough night," she put it simply, rolling her shoulders and pushing a smile to her face. "So, trying to beat a record, eh?"

"Hey, not funny," Bryan stated, a serious expression on his face. Bryan grinned, patting her shoulder, "Seriously, it's not fair."

"Aw," she cooed, brushing Bryan's shoulders, "You should just be glad you two aren't in a dark match this time."

"She has a point, Danielson," Stephen replied. "C'mon, yeh an' I have a match to get ready for." He turned to Shay, "Are yeh joinin' us?" She nodded, following them through the backstage area. Stephen turned, watching her. Honestly, he was still nervous. He had seen her previous on-screen romance with John, and he was questioning whether or not she was actually comfortable around him. Shaking his head, he cleared his throat, trying to push it out of his mind so he could focus on the match. She seemed to sense his worry, and she put a hand on his arm.

"Don't worry, Stephen. Everything's going to work out perfectly fine."

** [On-screen]**

** Sheamus's music struck, and posed on the ramp.**

** "His opponent, being accompanied to the ring by Shay, from Dublin, Ireland... Sheamus!" Shay departed when they got into the ring, and she took her place at ringside. As soon as Daniel Bryan turned around, he was met with a Brogue Kick to the face, and she grinned. Sheamus pinned the fallen Champion, and, a three count later, was being announced as the successor. Climbing into the ring, she raised his hand in victory. After a few moments of celebration, she walked with him backstage, Daniel and AJ glaring as they left...**

** Shay met Sheamus backstage, walking up to him with a smile on her face. She rested a hand on his shoulder as she leaned with her back against the wall.**

** "So, you're Champion now." It wasn't a question, and he grinned, nodding. "Impressive."**

** "Thanks, I'm glad yeh were there for me. Yeh believed in me, an' I finally put Daniel Bryan in his place," He chuckled, musing as he turned his attention to her. "You didn't come here jus' to say that, though. Whattaya need?"**

** "What do I need?" She repeated, "Well, I was hoping to congratulate you." He looked at her, absorbing her presence.**

** "An' I was hopin' to properly thank yeh," his hand came to rest on the small of her back. He could smell the faint linger of her perfume and she nodded.**

** "Can I properly congratulate you first?" Shay asked and he nodded, his heart thudding against his chest as she leaned in closer. Her arms draped over his shoulders, and his eyebrows rose as her lips brushed against his. **

** "Yeh call that a congratulations?" Sheamus smirked. "Well then, lemme show yeh how I plan on thanking yeh.," he held her chin in his hand and captured her lips in a kiss. Sheamus felt her fingers rake through his hair, massaging his scalp. There was a jolt, electricity ran down his spine and through his fingers as he deepened the kiss.**

** [Off-screen]**

Stephen wrapped his arms around the blonde, pulling her tightly against his body. He wasn't sure if the cameras were still on them, and she didn't seem to care if they weren't. As far as he knew, they were supposed to stop soon, unless they changed something on him. He didn't really care. Right now, he was caught up in her. Her lips against his, her hands in his hair. Stephen pushed back against her.

And then, much to soon for his liking, she pulled away and placed one last peck on his lips. She ran her fingers across his shoulders. "You look good in gold." He watched her walk away before shaking his head. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the camera crew stare in shock before jumping the camera away. Resting his back against the wall, he took in a breath and remembered her words.

Yeah, he thought, chaste.


	16. Defenses

**Alrighty, here's another chapter of Moth to a Flame. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling and grammatical errors. Mucho grande to Angel for helping me work out some kinks, and I hope you all enjoy this chapter. **

**Please read and review, and enjoy. OH and look on my profile for some important information.**

**Kiwi**

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><p>"What the hell was that!" Shay winced as Nick's voice resounded in her skull. Instinctively, she tried to harrow in on escape routes, people she could latch on to and use as life rafts. She looked for Stephen.<p>

Rolling her eyes, she figured that the one time he had left her alone in two weeks, she'd be targeted by Nick. Fantastic. Turning on her heels, she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and looked up at the blond.

"How may I be of assistance?" Alright, so she hadn't meant to come off as a smartass, it was just starting to appear whenever she felt threatened. A new compulsion, perhaps, she wondered before focusing back on Nick. He was fuming, a vein was pulsating in his neck, and she could've sworn it would burst at any moment.

With a flushed red face, he curled and uncurled his fists. "What was with that at WrestleMania, huh?"

"Are we talking about your amazing selling abilities, or..."

"That stupid kiss, Shay!" Nick cut her off, pinching the bridge of his nose.

She put her hands on her hips. _That_ is what got him so pissed off? Granted, he flipped the lid when she even talked to John, so she wasn't exactly surprised. "N-Nick, you're overreacting." You _always_ overreact, she added mentally, trying to avoid his glare. She would be fine, as long as she avoided eye contact.

"I know exactly what will happen. History has a tendency to repeat itself, doesn't it? You always fall in love with your storyline partner, and you always end up being hurt."

"Correction. I was never in a storyline with you... or Dave, f-for that matter. Therefore, that argument is invalid," Shay whispered, and Nick laughed, shaking his head.

"Doesn't matter. Within months you'll be gushing over him, and when he leaves you broken hearted and crying, you'll realize that you were never meant for love, Shay. Never. That will always evade you. You only truly had it with me."

"Come on, Nick. You could have any girl you wanted. Wh-why can't you just leave me alone?"

"Because," he choked out through gritted teeth, "letting you go would mean losing. And I never lose, Shay. Never."

She nodded, hiding her shaking hands behind her back as she stepped around the man. "G-Good luck with that." Walking away, she released the breath she had been holding. She was feeling somewhat confrontational after the brief stint with Nick, and she was beginning to feel the onsets of restlessness. Leaving the arena, she headed off down the sidewalk, knowing she should've left a note. "I-If they want me, they can call." The air was clear, but it bit at her arms. In a way, it was comforting.

Soon, she found herself in the park, and she took a seat on the bench. A few birds flew in the air, chirping and singing little songs to each other. Her mind went back to Dave, to Nick, to everything that had been happening recently. It was all clear, hard and intense in her head. Everything was falling apart, and she was afraid to touch the pieces.

"You're going to have to get yourself together. Sooner or later. You'll die if you don't," she whispered, resting her head in her hands. Running a hand through her hair, she mentally counted down the days to John's wedding. She decided she had to go, whether it be out of common courtesy, or proving to John that she was doing just fine without him. It was hard to believe that in two months she'd be attending the wedding of a former love, when, this time two years ago, she thought that she'd be the one he'd wed. Her eyes rested on her ringless left hand.

Shaking her head, she thought that maybe Nick had a point. After all, it made perfect sense. The menace in his voice, the taunting tone that had struck fear in her too many times before, was ringing in her ears. He had something planned, that she was sure of. Either that, or he was just aiming to break her down again. The worst thing he could do was break her silence, release her demons to be witnessed by all their coworkers, and perhaps that was frightening. Why wouldn't it be? How would their opinions change of her? How many would brand her a pathetic, worthless pity-party? It hurt the same when nobody knew anyway, didn't it?

Steadying her breathing, she began to wonder where she went wrong with her life. If it wasn't one thing falling apart, it was the other. She hadn't even spoken to Chris yet, and it had been nearly three weeks. Jay was gone again, and they had barely reconciled. Every one else was just there because Stephen was, or Randy was. And Randy was only there because Adam told him to be.

"You should be wearing a coat," Randy stated, and she startled. Speak of the devil. He sat next to her, and she sighed.

"I'm fine."

"If you say so," he murmured, looking her over. "I heard you had a run in with Dave."

Shay chuckled. He didn't know anything about her and Dave. And, should things work out in her favor, he'd never have to. She wasn't sure why, she just didn't want anyone knowing. It would be another weakness for her, and she'd become a bigger target. Besides, all it would do is cause trouble. For her. For anyone who got involved. No, that was a secret she'd hold in her chest.

"Yeah."

"I think I know your problem."

"Oh, do share. I'd love to know what your interpretation of my actions is. Because I don't hear it enough from Jay, Adam, Chris..." Shay listed off, inwardly wincing at the harshness of her voice. That's why she disappeared from the arena. They'd hear this, this spite... this sarcastic bitterness that was beginning to erupt. Alright. So she was notorious for running away from her problems. She knew that, she just didn't need to have it relayed to her in different tones.

His eyebrow hiked at her and she muttered an apology under her breath. "You keep so many secrets. Why? So people don't have to know, Shay? Or are you just afraid that the more you talk about it, it becomes that much more real?"

"I know that what happened was fact."

"But talking about it makes it real. It brings back pain that goes away when you only think about it."

"Reasonable," Shay stated, shrugging. "I also just think that the past is the past, and it should stay that way."

"I'll buy that."

"Adam never told you anything about me when he dragged you into this, did he?" She looked incredulously at the St. Louis native. He shrugged, replying that Adam said he'd have to go to her for that. "And, if I want you to know, you'll know. Right now, I just don't want you to know."

"But us not knowing is killing you. Why aren't you sleeping, Shay? Huh? Are you still having nightmares of the crash? Do you honestly think putting it off will help any?"

"It'll go away, Randy. It'll go away," Shay said.

"Demons don't go away until you chase them down," Randy added, standing. "I have to go. I'll see you around."

"Heh, any advice for me before you go?"

"Yeah," he began as he turned around, "Start running in the other direction." Shay nodded and stood after he left. It made sense, but she was afraid.

Was it sad that she still was afraid of Nick? Or maybe it wasn't Nick she was afraid of. Walking back to the arena, her mind was swimming with questions and things she'd rather leave hidden. As she entered the arena, she ran into a short brunette. From the ground, she gazed up at the shorter woman, who's hand flew to her mouth. AJ's eyes widened.

"I-I...Shay, I am so sorry."

Shay didn't reply, she just continued to study AJ. She thought of AJ's storyline with Bryan, and how much that actually affected her. It was continuous flashbacks every time she saw them together on-screen. Now, she knew neither meant anything by it. Hell, neither of them knew, and they didn't see how awkward it was for Shay. From being in that situation, to watching it from a short distance... it was eye-opening. _Did I act like that around Nick?_ She questioned, but quickly dismissed it.

"Shay?" AJ whispered, hands still near her mouth. The brunette looked nervous, as if she had just struck somebody of higher authority. Shay bit her lip and cursed under her breath, she had not answered yet.

Offering up the best smile, however fraudulent, she could, she waved it off. "I-It's fine," Shay got to her feet and dusted herself off. Still, AJ looked worried. "What?"

"N-nothing. I just... I thought you hated me."

Shay couldn't help but laugh. Covering her mouth, she regained composure and shook her head. "I-I am so sorry for laughing. I don't hate you, AJ. Really." Shay gave her a reassuring smile and put a hand on AJ's shoulder.

"Oh," AJ looked relieved, "It's just whenever I saw you backstage during a segment with Bryan, you seemed tense, and you kept giving me this look, and...I just thought you had something against me." She shrugged, "But thank you for clearing it up."

Alright, so maybe she involuntarily reacted to the storyline, Shay winced. Perfect. "No," she said, "Not against you. Just... something that happened a long, long time ago."

The look on AJ's face frightened Shay, it was as if she knew, as if she could read Shay's mind. When AJ's expression softened, and she extended a hand out to Shay, Shay nearly flinched. "It happened to you, didn't it?" Shay wasn't sure if it was the understanding tone in AJ's voice, or the soft smile reflected back to her. Regardless, Shay nodded. It would be stupid to avoid it. Though she knew AJ didn't particularly enjoy confrontation, she knew that she couldn't get away with avoiding the subject.

Half an hour later, she was sitting in a little cafe, laughing at something AJ had said. AJ's face fell again, and Shay prepared herself for the questions that would surely come. "Shay, did Bryan know?"

"No."

"I'm sure if he would've, he would've made sure you were okay. Did Vince?"

"No," she replied again.

"So, Vince doesn't know about Nick? He let you be in a storyline where verbal abuse was happening, and he didn't know? How could he not know something like that about his employee?" Shay shrugged.

"I-I guess I just never wanted him to know. It was a long time ago, AJ. Just, don't tell anyone I told you."

"Why not?" She fiddled with the straw in her drink. "Maybe that's why Stephen's been so weird lately. Maybe if you'd tell him, and Bryan, and everyone else, you'd feel better. Word around the block is you don't sleep much, and maybe telling someone, telling everyone would help." The hope in her voice struck a chord in Shay, who shrugged again. "You're really nice, Shay. You always looked so... anti-social."

"P-Partially Nick's fault. Besides, the last time I told someone, Nick got his face punched in."

"Isn't that a good thing? Does he still bug you?" AJ asked, and Shay nodded, going into further detail, much more than she cared for. But AJ was so inviting, so sweet and understanding... it was hard to stop the flow of information from her lips. One person couldn't hurt, and AJ didn't look like the gossiping type. They spoke for a while, going over the most random things, and Shay didn't mind. She found AJ's company to be nice, and for a change, not as intimidating.

Later that evening, she entered the hotel room she was sharing with Stephen and set her bags down on her bed. Stephen wasn't anywhere in sight, but she could hear the shower running. Knocking on the door, she didn't wait for a response, and entered.

"Yer lucky I had the curtains drawn."

"Uh-huh," she stated absentmindedly, turning her attention to the mirror. Shay ran her fingers along her scar, feeling the difference in skin. In the back of her mind, swerving cars and wet asphalt came to mind. She heard John calling her name, and the snap of her head against the ground. Choking back the sob, she calmed herself down.

"Wha' are yeh doin' in here?" Stephen asked, and she muttered under her breath.

"You've been leaving me alone all week."

Stephen shrugged, so what if he had. He kept thinking about her, and what she said about 'once he started, he wouldn't be able to stop'. It was just one of those things someone says, wasn't it? She had just said it to get to him, to get into his head. Just like that kiss was anything but chaste. They way she smirked, the way she tilted her head and writhed against him... she had done all that to get under his skin, he was sure of it.

He just had to get her back out. It wasn't-

His thoughts were cut off by a ringing cell phone, and he cursed.  
>"So, her name was Miranda?" Shay asked off-handedly and Stephen muttered a confirmation. "And this makes it the..."<p>

"Fifth."

"_Fifth_ time today. Hmmm," Shay paused, and he sighed, waiting for the ringing to stop. It did, but far too soon for a missed call. "Hello?" Stephen's attention rose, and he stifled the laugh. Pulling back the curtain a little bit, he stuck his head out. Yeah, she had answered it. Just like she said she would. "Oh, hi," she grinned, tucking hair behind her ear, "No. This is Shay. Stephen's busy right now. He's in the shower." Shay sent him a small smile as she leaned against the counter. "Yes, I'm sure. I'm staring right at him. Quite the view, if you ask me. So, if he's free later, I'll have him call you back. You have a nice night, now. And congratulations on your wedding. Stephen's told me all about you. Alright. Good night," Shay finished, sighing with relief and setting his phone back on the counter. She smiled at him, and he allowed himself to laugh.

"Thanks. Now she has a bigger reason to hate me," He added, "Tha' was good, though. So, wha' made yeh think o' staring at me?" Stephen smirked and Shay shrugged.

"Beats me, now, hurry up. I wanted to take a shower too."

"Well, there's plenty o' room in here, if yeh wanted to join me."

"Mr. Farrelly, is that an invitation?" Shay asked.

"I dunno, Ms. Hart. Do yeh wan' it to be an invitation?" Stephen smirked as she sat on the counter. "So, what's up with yeh an' Cody?"

"Oh. Uh... I'm thinking about taking him up on his offer, and..."

"What offer?" Stephen asked, eyebrow rising. She never mentioned an offer. He watched her eyes shift. Shay muttered something. "A lil' louder."

"He asked me out. A couple of weeks ago, he said that when I'm ready to date again, I should keep him in mind."

Stephen paused, trying to smooth out the irritation in his voice. "I thought you weren't dating in the company any more?" He wasn't sure why he was angry. She was going back on her word, and maybe that was a part of it. Maybe it was the fact that if they did start dating, she'd be spending less time around him. He had grown accustomed to her presence, almost enjoying it.

"I thought I wasn't either, but... I don't know. He's really sweet, Stephen."

"PJ's really sweet, an' I don' see yeh hangin' off o' him," Stephen said, washing the shampoo from his hair.

"Why are you getting so defensive?"

He shut the water off, reached out and grabbed the towel Shay handed to him. Wrapping it around his waist, he stepped out. She had her arms crossed over her chest, and he looked her over. "Shower's open," he muttered, leaving the room. After he dressed, he retreated to the bed. Moments later, he heard the shower kick on. Honestly, he didn't know why it irked him so much, the thought of Shay and Cody together. He couldn't imagine them together.

No, he couldn't pinpoint why he didn't like it. He could still feel her lips against his, and that could've been part of the problem. Wetting his lips, he turned his back away from the bathroom.

He still tasted strawberries.


	17. I Like To Push It Until My Luck Is Over

**Here we gooooooo! Another chapter of Moth to a Flame!Woot-woot! I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/ grammatical errors. I hope you all enjoy! Looks like Shay might be coming back out of her shell, we'll have to see. **

**Oi, my birthday was on Thursday, and my party yesterday, so that was oodles of fun. A friend got me this really freaking awesome poster, and I now have to find a place to hang it. O.O Easier said than done in my room. Lol.**

**Don't forget to review! I love it when people review, and I appreciate them so much :D. **

**Kiwi**

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><p>Shay stifled a yawn as she stretched her arms. She was seated on a packaging crate in the hallway. Barely even a foot away was the men's locker room, and she was carrying... well, trying to carry on a conversation. Frankly, it was kinda difficult, considering they wouldn't let her inside. "I hope you all know how stupid I look yelling at a wall."<p>

"Well, we're not going to let you into the guy's room, Shay," Cody laughed, and she rolled her eyes.

"I did it before. Y'know, back when people didn't like me," She shook her head and played with her hair.

"And what happened when you did that?" Cody asked, but she could barely hear his voice. She imagined him grinning, giving her a knowing look, and laughing when the others in the room didn't get it.

"I fell out of the shower and sliced my leg open," she answered, "Again, that was a long time ago." Shay checked her watch, by her judgment, the show was just starting. "Besides-" Shay was cut off as the door swung open and the guys flooded out, disappearing down the hall. Rolling her eyes, she shrugged and slid off the crate. "I'll just... meet up with you guys later, then." Shoving her hands in her pockets, she walked down the hall, whistling a tune to herself.

She thought about the offer Cody made, and how sincere he had seemed. He had asked her to keep him in mind, and she complied. But, the thought haunted her, she wasn't ready... at least it didn't feel like it. If she was ready... for any kind of intimacy, wouldn't she be in a better state? Physically, she felt drained. Emotionally, she was drained. Finding a monitor, she sat atop a table and waited. It seemed like half the roster was out there, and she could spot Stephen in the mix.

And he had been confusing her as of late. First, it was the little tidbit of information he had leaked about him being nervous about the kiss. Why, she couldn't imagine, and the emotions he brought out of her... they were something she hadn't felt in a long time. It was like she was in that place before Nick, where she wasn't as screwed up. It was challenging, damn near frustrating at times, but she just felt like herself. Even if it were only a few, brief moments. He was prodding, then backing off before coming back in again; curious, but not afraid of getting into something.

Her thoughts were interrupted when someone tapped her shoulder. She jumped, and the man recoiled, sending a pleading look at her and she shook her head. "Ch-Chris..." Shay trailed off, running a hand through her hair. "What do you want?"

"I wanted to apologize," he replied, biting his lip. "I... uh, that was pretty much it. I just wanted to apologize, maybe explain..."

"You want to explain why you teamed up with my abusive exes to try and sabotage my relationship with John?" Shay threw up her hands and laughed, "Perfect. Did you know he was eavesdropping on our conversation that night?" Chris sighed, and shook his head.

"No," his voice sounded choked, exasperated, borderline on anger. "I didn't... I wanted you two to break up, but I changed my mind, Shay. Doesn't that count for something? I blame myself for it, and you know that. You heard what Nick said," Chris stated, resting his hands on his hips. "If it hadn't been for me, you two wouldn't have broken up, and you wouldn't have gotten injured, and you...you'd be better..." He grappled for the right word and Shay snorted, standing as she turned to face the blond.

"Yeah, I'd be able to sleep at night and, you can say it, I wouldn't be so screwed up. And I heard exactly what Nick said," she stepped forward, poking him in the chest, "You tried to sabotage my relationship with John."

"That's wha' happened?" Shay spun around, eyes widening as Stephen stood there, face contorted with confusion.

"H-how long...how long have you been standing there?" She questioned, turning her attention to him now. Chris muttered something under his breath and walked away.

"Jus' walked by," Stephen shrugged, "I'm here to talk, if yeh'd like." He followed her as she brushed past him.

"I don't," she didn't mean to snap and she sighed, "I-I didn't mean to snap. I'm just frustrated." Shay gestured to where they had been standing. "Um, ready for another segment?"

"Don' really have a choice, now do I?" He cocked an eyebrow at her and she laughed. "My only question is, are yeh plannin' on havin' it be as chaste as the last one?" She felt her cheeks grow hot as he studied her face. "Unless _tha'_ was yer version of chaste, in which case..." he smirked.

Shay shrugged, "Maybe it was my version of chaste," Shay paused. "I-I think I am going to ask Cody out."

"Why?" He asked, taken aback by the abrupt statement.

"B-because, if you think about it... it makes sense. I mean... maybe what I need is a relationship," She glanced back at Stephen, who was rolling his eyes. "What? I-I know I'm not exactly in the best shape right now, but maybe Cody can help that. You know what I mean?" They continued down the hall, and she fell into an easy pace beside him. This time, he shruggged.

"I just don' think yeh should use him as a crutch. Besides, yeh deserve better than Cody. I think any o' us is better fer yeh than Cody."

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Shay rose her eyebrow at him.

"It wouldn' be fair to him, an' it wouldn' be fair to yeh. Yeh'd be putting whatever's left o' yer entire self into him, an' he's thinkin' he's gettin' all o' yeh. If yeh heart isn' in it, than yeh shouldn' even bother. Stand fer yerself, before yeh start thinkin' about standin' with somebody." He turned to face her, "Think about it, Shay. Wha' do yeh like about him?"

"He's nice, he's sweet, and he's attractive..." Shay started, taken aback by the question. Stephen shook his head.

"He doesn't challenge yeh? Intellectually, mentally... does he make yeh feel like yerself, or is it jus' comfort yer looking for? There's somebody out there, Shay. Somebody who can offer yeh both. An' I don' think Cody's it. Besides, he looks the same as the rest o' them."

"Enlighten me," Shay bit her lip, a little miffed, partially because she knew he was right. Cody was attractive, he was alluring and charismatic to the point where it was ridiculous. When Cody spoke, people stopped to listen. He was like John in that respect.

"Tan, dark hair." Stephen chuckled, "Yeh seem to like em tha' way. Nick, Dave, John... Wha' yeh didn' think people would notice that all yer exes look somewhat alike?"

"I didn't even really notice. I got with Dave because he was so sweet, and he-he was protection from Nick. John... I thought he was bringing me back. It's not like I had some sort of method of selection."

"An', all o' them screwed yeh over in a way. Yeh wan' somebody who speaks the truth, yeh wan' honesty. An' yeh don't want to be treated like some fragile lil' doll. I don' see yeh as fragile, Shay. Or weak. Yer jus' not yerself righ' now." They stopped, having reached the door. He opened it for her, and they continued outside.

/

"W-well...that was short-lived," Shay muttered, turning back to Stephen, whose eyes had narrowed. She had just turned the corner, and saw a familiar head of brown hair caressing a woman. At first, she had peered in, trying to get a better look, before confirming that it was Cody. The woman laughed, hooking arms with him before leaving.

Stephen shook his head and put a hand on her shoulder. "Did he promise yeh he'd wait?"

Shay nodded, "He said he wouldn't make me do anything, and that he had this in-insane attraction to me... that we'd be perfect together."

"O' course. A lot o' people have an insane attraction to yeh," Stephen murmured as he caught her eye. Seeing the question form, he shook it off. "Jus' an observation."

"Uh-huh," She didn't believe him, "If you say so, Stephen. Why do you seem so upset over this. You didn't even want us together."

"Yeah, but tha' was unfair. If he promised yeh, he promised yeh. If I told yeh, 'Shay, we're gonna go back to the hotel, and we're gonna watch yer favorite T.V. show 'til we fall asleep, promise.' I'd take yeh back to the hotel, and watch yer favorite show 'til yeh fell asleep. Simple as tha'. I try to keep my word as often as I can..." Stephen trailed off, shaking his head and she nodded.

"Psych, my favorite T.V. show is Psych, in case we ever do decide to watch our favorite TV shows until we fall asleep. You know, we probably should be getting back to the hotel. We have a big day tomorrow. You excited for Ireland? It'll be nice going back home."

He nodded, "An' when was the last time yeh were home?"

"It's been awhile," she admitted. "Just because you live somewhere, doesn't make it your home." She noticed his slight smile and nod, "Home is safety, the feeling of being yourself, of not caring who's staring. Home is comfort, a place away from harm. For example, anywhere away from Dave felt like home." She glanced up at him, waiting for his reaction. He cleared his throat and looked away. They walked in silence for a while, enjoying the feel of the night around them. What was his reaction to Wrestlemania, she thought, habitually biting her lip. Sure, it hadn't exactly been _chaste_, but something was alluring about him, and not in the way it was with Cody. Like he was drawing her out of a shell she had constructed. No, he didn't do it gently, he just really didn't let her get away with much. He had stopped being so prodding, so invasive. Now, he called her on her bluff when he knew it was necessary.

Well, at least he's honest. She recognized that. She also realized how far she had come in the last few months, how things had been broken, how things had been repaired, and how things began to change. Nick hadn't left her alone, but that wasn't new. She was still trying to put herself back together, and that wasn't exactly new either.

It was her surroundings. Even when she was with John, things weren't the way they were now. Her recent use of sarcasm, the people she had been acquainted with as of late, they were all new. New, and shining, sparkling under a light she had forgotten about. Her eyes flickered to Stephen. He had been one who had wanted to know... wanted to help, but she refused to let him. Why, she still wasn't sure. She usually put it all in trust, and perhaps her definition of trust was skewed.

"If it gets really bad, maybe I'll tell him," she murmured.

"Wha' was that?"

"Oh, n-nothing. So, this Miranda chick still calling?"

"She did, an' I talked to her. Wan's to meet yeh now."

Shay grimaced, "You talked about me?"

"She asked if yeh were a ring-rat whore I picked up at an event."

"Well, that isn't good," she chuckled, tucking her hands behind her back. Alright, maybe answering the phone wasn't the best idea. A little juvenile, yeah, but she thought it'd get the chick to leave him alone. She didn't want to cause him more stress, particularly since the wedding was only a couple weeks away. Speaking of which, he hadn't been talking about it lately, not that she blamed him. She didn't tell him anything. It was just that, while there was a certain intensity she felt around him, she couldn't bring herself to divulge everything. "Wh-what did you say?"

"The truth."

"Which is..." she pushed, straightening her posture, "Am I some ring-rat you picked up?" Her eyebrow arced, and he gave a slight laugh.

"Nah," he rolled his shoulder, "I decided an escort was a bit classier."

"Escort, eh?"

"Yeah, sounds better than 'call-girl'," he deadpanned before sending her a smirk. "Actually, I told her yeh were gorgeous, an' smart, an' a handful. 'Also told her yeh were a sweet woman with a heart o' gold, an' that I had moved on."

"Huh, and I told her I was staring at you in the shower. That's fair," she shook her head.

"Well, yeh _have _made it a habit to stare at me. When yeh were gettin' yer bags, when we were on the balcony, when I was..."

"I-I just space out sometimes..."

"Uh-huh," he circled around her, the smirk still on his face. "I get it, I do. I am completely mesmerizin'. An' I apologize for cripplin' yer attention span."

"Mmmm, sure. I forgive you, King Sheamus. And I will see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" His eyebrow rose, and his voice fell with disappointment.

"Uh, yeah. AJ wants me to room with her tonight. U-Unless you wanted me to stay-"

"No, no... it's fine. Really, jus' surprised, that's all. Yeh and AJ get along?"

"P-Pretty well, actually. I-I think it comes from the fact neither of us really enjoy talking. So," she trailed off, scratching the back of her head, "I'll see you tomorrow for our flight. Try not to get into too much trouble without me there, alright?" He nodded, smiling slightly as she put a hand on his forearm. "Good night, Stephen."

"Night, Shay," he said. "Do yeh need a ride to the hotel?"

"Oh, no. AJ's giving me a ride. I-I should go find her..." Shay trailed off, craning her neck before turning back to Stephen. "Again, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Alrigh'. Sleep well, Shay," he said, even though he knew she wouldn't.

And she didn't. She was perched on the windowsill, staring out the window, while AJ slept behind her. She was in shorts and a tank top, and she could see her reflection in the glass. Pressing her forehead against the cool surface, she began to think things over. Maybe she needed change, she thought. If she could be someone else, would it help? It would take away the pain, the sting that still lacerated her. Or would she just grow to hate the person she became?

Her phone buzzed, and she pulled it out of her pocket. _Chris_.

A sigh passed her lips. She really should talk to him, clear everything up. She didn't blame him, not for the accident, and not for her and John breaking up. It wasn't his fault, it just wasn't. Her finger hovered over the answer button, and she pushed it as she held the phone to her ear.

"Shay!" Chris's voice rang out. "I didn't expect you to answer."

"Hi, Chris," she caught herself before she started chewing on her lip again. It was a bad habit she had picked up, and it was starting to become irritating. "I wanted to say something."

"Nah, me first, Snowball." She grinned at his nickname for her. He had said that she reminded him of snow, of purity. The fact that she lived in a cabin in Calgary probably had something to do with it too. He took her silence as a cue to go on. "Hey, I was wondering if we could talk about... about John."

"What about him?"

"I know I made a mistake, Shay. I really do, and I know apologizing won't help. You don't want my apology, and I know that you'll come around to forgiving me on your own. I just wanted to talk about what happened with him."

"Alright," she murmured, already not liking where this conversation was going. She was over the cheating, she was over him. It was the pain that stayed. The car accident, his betrayal, how he had shattered his promises over a simple overreaction... that's what she was iffy about.

_If you were over him, you wouldn't be so messed up now_.

Shay winced. The thought reverberated in her head. She didn't want to be back with John, she didn't want it to be her he was marrying, she just didn't want to be plagued with these thoughts and feelings she couldn't get rid of.

_Maybe you rushed into things with John and you still weren't over Dave._

Nattie's theory came to mind, it had only been a few short months between her break up with Dave to her storyline with John. Things rushed, life sped forward, and, looking back at it, it was a wonder she didn't get left behind. She fell into what she assumed was love, and it was... wasn't it? Or was it just a comfort blanket?

No, she shook her head. It was love.

"Shay?" Shay startled, realizing she hadn't been paying attention to Chris.

"I-I'm sorry, Chris. What were you saying?"

She could hear his sigh. "I was just saying that if you need to talk to somebody about what happened, you can come to me. You can go to Adam, Jay, hell, Stephen. I know it was a long time ago, about a year, and I know you're still feeling it. It wasn't your fault, either. Maybe that's why you've been having trouble sleeping, Shay. You have all this stuff just sitting on your chest and you can't, or won't, get it off."

She let him talk, she didn't feel like responding. He had pretty much said the same thing as AJ had said. 'Telling people would make her feel better'. "Wh-why, so they can all pity me?"

"They won't pity you... What if I was there with you, when you told them? Would that help?"

"Probably not," she groaned, running a hand over her face and down through her hair. She checked the clock on the wall, it was almost three in the morning. "W-what are you doing up anyway?"

"I couldn't sleep. I figured you'd be awake too."

"You have a flight to catch tomorrow."

"So do you."

"You're more valuable to the roster than I am. I'll catch up on sleep on the plane, if I can't do it now. I-I'll catch you later, Chris," She said goodbye, hung up, and walked towards the bed. Well, at least they were talking again. Setting her phone on the end table, she slid beneath the covers and stared at the wall until she fell asleep.

She woke up to AJ shaking her shoulder. "Up and at 'em, Shay."

"Huh?" Shay rolled over, flipping the sheets from her body. "What time is it?"

"11, our plane leaves in an hour and a half. I let you sleep in as long as possible," AJ murmured the last part. "Everything's all packed and in the car, I left you out a spare of clothes." The young Diva nodded towards a neat pile at on the small desk. "You could even take a shower, if you hurry."

Shay nodded, almost at a loss for words, "Uh... thank you, AJ. T-thank you." She stood, gathered the clothing, gave AJ a quick hug, and disappeared into the bathroom.

About an hour or so later, she was in the aisle of an airplane, and she had gotten the aisle seat of the airplane, Stephen flanking her left, and an empty seat by the window. AJ was behind her. "H-hey, AJ? Mind if we switch seats?" AJ nodded, and Shay shuffled into the row, trying to worm her way around Stephen.

"Wha'? No lapdance?" He sent her a sly grin, and she bent down to face him.

"I don't think you could afford my wages," Shay tsked as she climbed over him and sat down.

"Fer an escort, yeh suck at yer job."

"Are lapdances in my job description?" Shay asked, crossing her legs as she fastened her seatbelt.

"Did I miss something?" AJ asked, chuckling as she flipped through a magazine. Stephen shrugged, and Shay dismissed it. As the plane rose into the air, Shay yawned. "Tired? You had a freakin' eight hour nap this morning."

"Well, I'm about to take another one," Shay stated, rolling her small jacket into a pillow. Instead of sleeping, she wound up staring out the window. Resting her fingers on the glass, she sent a look over her shoulder. Stephen was listening to music, AJ was reading a book, and she... she was thinking about telling them. About letting them in, maybe... because it just might help.

"I-I will," she murmured, "I-I might..." Shay corrected, watching the clouds outside. "If it gets really bad."


	18. Teetering on Fragility

**So here's another chapter of Moth to a Flame, and I only own Shay. Gah, this is a long chapter, lol. I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors, and I hope you all read, review, and enjoy. :D**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>She was sitting beside John as he took another turn. The car accelerated beneath her, and she could feel the rhythmic whirr of the engine. This was way too fast for this road, for this time of year... for any time of year. He didn't seem to care. No, his foot pumped the gas as he spoke. She could barely grasp his words, slippery and inaudible over the thundering rain and straining engine. John had promised the park, murmuring that that was her favorite place.<p>

The stench of alcohol was faint, but it was there. Her chest tightened, her throat constricted as he spun another sharp curve. Tears bit her eyes as he spoke incoherently. His eyes kept drifting from the road, analyzing her while she gripped the edges of the seats.

"J-Johnny... k-keep your eyes on the road."

"J-Johnny, you're scaring me..." She cried, begging and pleading as he pushed on.

There was a moment of silence.

Then the implosion of glass.

A scream ripped from her throat as the car spun, sliding against the asphalt as her head whipped against the headrest. Shards embedded themselves into her arm, and she felt the faint trickle of blood seep through her sleeve. The car flipped, the windshield shattered, and she was flung from her seat. Bones splintered and shattered, the pain lost in her fear. How her life had gone from happy, to being threatened at the hands of someone who loved her was beyond her comprehension.

Her head cracked on the asphalt, she couldn't breath. A weight was sitting on her chest, and deep within her mind, Nick's laugh resounded.

Her eyelids fluttered open, snapping shut again at the bright light in the room. White sheets, white everything... she was in the hospital. Gingerly, she felt her jaw. Gauze and bandaging were rough beneath her fingers. Her leg was raised, and tubes flowed in and out of her body. She couldn't remember how she had gotten here, or why. It didn't feel right, something wasn't right.

Slowly easing her eyes open, she tried to swallow. It felt like her mouth had been filled with cotton. Wetting her lips, she winced at the sharp pain that dug at her side. The last thing she remembered was the car spinning before it all went black. Where was John, was he here? Steadying her breathing, her eyes flickered to the door. Someone had slipped in. They were blurry, faded and rimmed with shadows. Questions died on her lips, fading into the open air as the figure moved closer. It wouldn't speak, it just cocked its head to the side as it moved forward. As it did, features became clearer.

He... she could tell it was a 'he' now, was hovering over her. A smirk spread across his face, and he drew back the shadowy cloak. "Now, now, Shay... look what you've gotten yourself into." A soft whimper rumbled in her throat, her eyes widened as he laughed.

"D-Dave?" Nearly silent, she could barely recognize her own voice. Frail, shattered and fragmented into dust, she was defenseless.

"You should've stayed with me, Shay," Dave murmured, brushing his thumb along her cheek, and she fought the urge to cry. "But now you have to pay the price." His hands landed on her neck, closing slightly. Whatever breath she could find was leaving her, and she screamed. The look in his eyes was so cold... so haunting... she squeezed hers shut to avoid his stare. He wanted to look into her eyes as he killed her, and she would never give him that satisfaction. "Look at me, bitch!" Dave growled, backhanding her across the face. Tears ran in rivulets down her face, sobs rupturing her throat. This was the end, it was all going to fade soon.

She screamed. He smacked her again. She begged him, pleading for him to stop, and he mocked her. A weight was pressing into her shoulders, and she couldn't move anymore. Shay struggled, trying to push against both forces.

"Shay!"

That didn't sound like Dave. It was familiar, it was concerned, and she couldn't place it.

"Shay!" It was more urgent now, vehement as it struck her ears. Dave's grip tightened, she could feel the bruise forming.

"D-Dave..." she choked out, trying to pry his hands from her throat. He was too strong, black blotches were starting to dapple her vision. Her heart strained against her ribcage, feeling as though it was on fire. She could feel her life draining from her as it all started to fade...

_"SHAY!"_

Shay sprung forward, chest aching as she sobbed. Her shoulders shook, and she followed he hands braced on her shoulders to a face. Stephen. He looked horrified, frightened, even. His chest rose and fell as he dropped his arms and sat on the bed. Her eyes fell to the bed. It was normal, a thick red comforter of a hotel room. She wasn't in the hospital anymore. It had just been another nightmare.

Flinging herself forward, she collapsed in his arms, crying into his shoulder. He pulled her into his chest, stroking her hair. "It's alrigh'," he murmured. "Yer alrigh'."

She saw Drew in the corner, mouth agape. A small crowd had apparently gathered. Regal was in the small armchair, AJ had a hand over her mouth, eyes wide as they rested on Shay, and Bryan stood with his arm around her, his own worry settling in his face.

"Yer alrigh'," he repeated.

"I-I was h-h-having a n...nigh. I-I was in the hospital..." her voice shook and he tried to calm her down. "A-and he came into my room, a-a-and he put his hands around my neck and ch-cho-choked me. S-something was on my chest, ho-holding me down..."

"Tha' was jus' me, Shay," Stephen said, continuing to stroke her hair with one hand. The other held her to him, and she had curled in. "Yeh were shakin', an' I was tryin' ta calm yeh. I'm sorry if I scared yeh, Shay."

"I-It felt so real," she whimpered. Stephen nodded as she rested her head in the crook of his neck. The people in the room began to file out, and then they were alone. "You looked so scared, Stephen."

"I woke up to my roommate thrashin' 'round an' screamin', of course I was scared," he confided. "When yeh sleep... are those the kind of nightmares yeh have? O' Dave stranglin' yeh?" She shook her head.

"Usually jus' the crash," Instinctively, her hand went to her neck, where she could almost feel his weight pushing against her. "Dave?"

Stephen ran a hand through his hair and released a breath. "Yeh said his name a couple times."

"Oh," she muttered, shaking her head. "Why was everyone here?"

"I assumed yeh woke 'em up too. Drew an' Regal are next to us, Bryan stopped by to go over some things, AJ's across the hall," he explained and she nodded. Things had gotten unexpectedly worse. This was the last thing she needed, waking up in the middle of the night to a bunch of worried faces as she tried to gather her senses. Her heart thundered in her ribcage, and from where she sat, she could feel his. She felt a little better now that she was awake and could breathe. She took in a shaky breath, reveling in the warmth around her.

"What time is it?"

"A lil' after three, I think," Stephen said, and she slid from his embrace. Shivering at the sudden chill that swept in, she padded into the bathroom. She could hear him following, and she turned to face him. She wasn't sure why, but the moment his eyes met hers, she could feel her exterior crumbling. He stepped forward, taking her face in his hands and brushing away her tears. "Yeh won' be able to sleep again, will yeh?"

"Not tonight," Shay whispered, her hand rubbing at her neck. Things had just spiraled out of control. There wasn't any feasible way to get around it, and she had this feeling that sooner or later, the secrets she had been trying to keep would come out, whether by her tongue, or by someone else. "It's never been this bad before, Stephen. I don't know why. I-I just don't."

"Yeh had a nightmare, I don' think it matters who was in it. It was random, more than likely. Could'a been me who showed up, could'a been Adam, or Jay, or Bryan..." Stephen shrugged, "Jus' anybody."

"Stephen. What are nightmares? Projections of our subconscious. Most nightmares are projections of our f-fears, of things we don't want to happen, or of bad things that did happen. I couldn't imagine you trying to choke me, I couldn't imagine Adam, or Jay... or Bryan. See what I mean?" Shay ran a hand through her hair, fingering the dull locks. "Would I have random images of Bryan trying to choke the life out of me?" Stephen shrugged, going to stand next to her as she focused her gaze into the mirror. She had a point, and it was starting to sink in. He didn't speak, and she nodded, brushing past him. " I think there's something you should know, Stephen," she swallowed the uneasiness as she took her place on the bed. Stephen seemed to tense as he sat done.

"I'm not sure if I like that tone," he said softly, rubbing his chin. He sat across from her, watching her carefully. "Are yeh okay?"

"No," she stated, folding her hands in her lap. By habit, she started fiddling with the hem of her shirt, then the comforter. "It's about Dave."

"Alright..." Stephen trailed off, "What about him?"

"He...he...," Shay began, clearing her throat. She could feel the hot tears stinging her eyes, and she tried to blink them away. Closing her eyes, she could see _him_. The Dave she had fallen victim to, the grip he had on her, it was all still evident in her mind and she doubted it would every go away. Still, things had gotten bad and quickly. Besides, she trusted him now. Stephen's expression softened, and he put a hand on her knee.

"Yeh know yeh don' have to, righ'?"

"Huh," she scoffed, "And to think a few months ago you were pushing me to tell you."

"That was before, Shay. I decided it was better for yeh to tell me when yeh were ready," he replied, "An' yeh told me yer issue with Nick." He stated, but she could detect the faintest tones of relief; he'd be getting what he had originally wanted.

"That night, at the Hall of Fame Ceremony, when I ran into Dave... I had one of the worst nights of sleep I can remember. And it was because of Dave. I just... memories came flooding back, and I couldn't help it. It's like every time I'm around him I get this scared, helpless feeling. All he has to do is look at me and do that stupid look of his. It's like he can see into my head, still. N-Nattie thinks that I just jumped into the relationship with John, and that I still wasn't over Dave," Shay coughed, gripping the comforter in her hands. She shook her head , "He was the only one who hit me. W-well... Nick did a couple years ago, but that was only once. D-Dave did it whenever I made him angry, wh-whenever he was frustrated and needed to take it out on something... _someone_."

Stephen cleared his throat, glancing away from her before meeting her eyes, "An' how often was this?"

"Often enough," Shay murmured, "Maybe a few times a week, I-I didn't really keep track, I-I just... went with it. S-Some of these scars are him, h-his mark on me. A few of them aren't physical, h-he's where I started to lose faith. It's.. e-everything started out fine," she couldn't stop the quaver in her voice, and she saw his gaze stay. "H-he was perfect, he would hold me, a-and say that he loved me, and that I was perfect... a princess. A-And I was naïve. He started playing these mind games, and it was terrible. O-One minute I'd be pissing him off for something stupid, and he'd be leaving me for it, telling me how lost I'd be without him. Days later he'd come back, or I'd go to him, grovelling b-because I thought that he loved me."

Stephen sat back, dragging his hand through his hair as he moved to sit next to Shay. He listened as she recounted, her breathing quickening as she explained it all to him. She told him how it started with Nick, and how her life faded and crumbled as the years followed. The visits to the hospital, the fear that had been instilled in her mind, how the scars were still evident, regardless of how long had passed; she told him about Dave Bautista, and everything he did to her.

Now he had a new theory, and he thought about what Adam had said. _It's not that great of a story, and once you hear it, you'll wish she never told you_. If that was what happened between her and Dave, how much worse could John have been? He had only heard good things from John about Shay, even though the California native never really took a liking to him, John had a tendency to tell people about Shay. John spoke highly of Shay, and he had even mentioned that he had wanted to marry her. Stephen scoffed inwardly, that little plan had been shattered.

"Things are falling apart, Stephen." He barely heard her soft whimper, and he had to look up to make sure she had said something. "Things are falling apart," Shay repeated, wringing her wrists, "I-I want to be better, Stephen. I want to change, but I just _can't_. I just can't take it anymore, this life... how it's going now. What's wrong with me? I-I can barely sleep, I-I distance myself from people who care about me and what for? Nick threatens to hurt them, they disappear once they realize just how _sick_ I am..A-are you listening?"

He gave a slight nod, refusing to speak. She'd learn in time, besides, he didn't want to say the wrong thing. Times like this were the times he chose to stay silent, when she was falling apart. He wouldn't have been able to find the right words to say anyway, he couldn't take her pain away right now. Her pain was something that usually just brushed his fingertips, close enough for him to touch, but too far away to really grasp and pull apart.

He wanted to, though. Didn't that count for anything? She had told him once, about how brittle her trust was, and her telling him this must've meant she trusted him. "Why would yeh let him have such an effect?"

"Who, Nick?" He nodded and she continued. "B-because he's the only constant thing in my life. Years pass and pass, new people come along, and he always stays. He lost me. He can't handle that."

"Well, I don' think I could handle losin' yeh either, with the way John talked about yeh. Before, an' after the accident." Moments later he realized that that probably wasn't the best thing to say. He saw her eyes widen, the question rolling on her lips. "Don't worry abou' it. Prolly jus' one o' those things people say when they're in love." He shrugged, "He always said good things abou' yeh, an' how he was crushed when yeh two broke up."

"Th-that's why everyone thinks I broke his heart."

"Yeh _did_, Shay," he grumbled, remembering how broken the California native had been the days following the breakup. The brunette would mope, ever so slightly backstage, mutter under his breath and kick the walls. He almost spoke to him about it, but decided against it. Now, he wished he had, then maybe he'd have a better grasp on the situation, and the upset woman beside him. She moved over to her side of the bed, and laid down.

"So what if I did. It's not like you've never broken a heart before," Shay muttered, rolling to face him. "I-I had good reason to, anyway."

"Huh, is there ever a good reason? Did yeh lose sight, or somethin'?"

"It was him that lost it..."

"He was smitten with yeh." Shay let out a sigh, shaking her head, and Stephen sat up straighter, half expecting her to ask something else. He just didn't believe why John would let her go, after everything he had heard. He saw the light in John's eyes when Shay would walk in the room, the way he would get a silly grin on his face when he got a text... it was borderline sickening. He glanced over at her, and saw the glimmer of fear in her eye. Sighing, he could see it in her eyes, she was still afraid. Moving to stand, he felt a hand slip on to his wrist.

"You must think I'm crazy,"

He shrugged, "Aren't we all?"

/

"I-I used to have friends," she stated, and he looked up from the newspaper to look at her. Her eyes were cradled by dark circles, and a faint, tired hue still rested in her skin. Briefly, he wondered what it would take for her to get enough sleep, enough times in a row, to remedy the effects of whatever was really bothering her. He still hadn't uncovered it. She had uncovered little pieces of her past, but he still didn't know much about her. "But I think they were John's friends, more than anything."

"Mike, Ron, an' them?" He took a sip of coffee, "Yeh said it yerself, yeh distance yerself from people. If they were yer friends, maybe they jus' didn't know how to handle it. Yeh dated a good friend of theirs, an' if it happened as suddenly as yeh said, they probably jus' didn't know how to comfort yeh, or whose side to be on." Stephen paused for a moment, "Are yeh expectin' us to leave? Bryan, AJ, an' I?

"I-I don't know. They always do," She ran a hand through her hair. Glancing up, she saw the irritation in his eyes.

"I'm not."

"Oh really?" Her eyebrow rose. "It's my curse, Stephen. I always end up alone, whether by my doing, or someone else. All my heroes leave."

"Then," he smiled, "it's a good thing I'm not a hero. Remember, I'm supposed to be a prince." She couldn't stop the smile that breached her face. Punk slipped into the chair beside Stephen, followed by Bryan. "Oh, hey."

"Hullo," Punk waved, pointing at Shay, "You need to talk to Chris. And Nick."

"Ha, talk to Nick... no," Shay muttered, "Chris... him, I'll talk to. Nick, not so much."

"Maybe he'll leave yeh alone. I'll go with yeh," Stephen stated, "We could all go with yeh. Why do yeh seem so against it?"

"What the hell is going on with Nick?" Punk cut in. "He just told me he really needed to talk to you later. He also said alone, so... not quite sure what you're going to do about that." The Straightedge Superstar shrugged, "How've you been?"

"Better," Shay replied, rubbing her temple. "N-Nick, seriously?" She rolled her eyes and gulped. "When?" She felt Stephen's hand on her shoulder, the frown that split his face. "I'll tell him to leave me alone, don't worry." Shay said, turning back to Punk. "Wh-when did he say this?"

"An hour or so ago. He said about two... it's noon right now," he checked his phone.

"Alright. Now, tell me about this whole storyline there, Punk," Shay chuckled, "It's actually kinda interesting... for a WWE Storyline."

"Hey," Stephen gently smacked her shoulder, "An' Bryan an' I aren't interestin'?" He smirked and she shook her head.

"You Brogue Kicked him in 18 seconds... that's not very interesting." She seethed, shaking her head. "And you have a 2 out of 3 at Extreme Rules..." A sudden look of worry flashed in her eyes. "Another short dress."

"Yer still comin' with me to the ring, aren't yeh?"

"Yeah, have been for the past few weeks, Stephen," Shay smiled, ruffling his hair, her eyes falling onto his. He pursed his lips, muttering something about her being a smartass as Punk and Bryan looked back and forth between the two. "Why? Did you have something in mind?"

"You look good in blue."

She thought on it for a moment, "I _might_ have blue somewhere in my arsenal. And how are Punk and Bryan today?"

"Uh, I was... Uh... good," Bryan settled on a word, chuckling as he shook his head. "You doing alright since last night...?" He glanced around, assuring that they were the only ones there. "I was worried."

"Wait... what happened?" Punk questioned, confusion creasing his brow.

"I just... I had a nightmare last night, Punk. It's nothing." She shook her head, sending a look towards Bryan, who quickly apologized. "I-I'm fine. I just had a bad night, that's all. I'm sure it won't happen again."

"Good. If it does, don't be afraid to tell us, okay?" She studied him, searching for a hint that AJ had told him the issue with Nick. Smiling, she nodded, resting a hand on Stephen's shoulder.

"I should get going." She stood, pulling her jacket on and zipping it up. Stephen followed, giving the other a slight wave.

"I'll walk with yeh," he added. Shay nodded and he walked close behind her as they left catering.

"AJ was telling me..." Bryan looked over his shoulder, a curious look on his face.

"They'd look good together..." Punk agreed. He interlaced his fingers, smirking at the two who had just slipped out of sight.

"He deserves someone good. Ever since Miranda." Bryan shook his head. "I've heard about her past relationships... I just don't want him to get hurt." Punk nodded, tapping his fingers across the table.

/

Stephen followed her through the halls. "What is with yeh an' touchin' my hair?" She spun around, a slightly amused look playing on her face. It transformed into a smirk, and he laughed.

"You don't like it when I do that?" She was almost surprised at the taunting tone in her voice. "Does this," she traced jawline with her thumb before slowly sliding her fingers through his ginger-hued hair, "annoy you, Stephen?"

He backed her up against the wall, one hand on each side of her. "If it did, then would yeh stop doin' it?" He leaned forward, and she could feel his breath fanning her neck. Alright, she'd admit it. The kiss had affected her as well. She bit her lip, finding the words on her tongue.

"P-Probably not."

"Then it doesn't annoy me," he cracked a grin, twirling a blonde strand of hair around his finger. She cleared her throat, searching his face. She kinda did want to kiss him again, something outside of the story line. His lips hovered centimeters away from hers, and she held in her breath. Stephen's hand moved to the small of her back. He lightly ran his fingers up and down her spine, and she tried to settle the shudder that ran through her. "Does tha' annoy yeh?"

She cleared her throat. "No," she was about to add something else, but the door beside them opened. Nick stepped out, a strained look painting his face as he ran his eyes over them. Shay pushed against Stephen's chest, and he jumped away. He looked annoyed, slightly hurt as he continued past Nick, eyes resting on the blond male in a heavy glare.

Nick frowned, arms crossed over his chest in thought. "You and Farrelly, huh?"

"N-No," she corrected. "Not Farrelly and I. What did you want, Nick?" He stepped back, bowing and sweeping his arm toward the room he had exited. Raising an eyebrow, she walked past him. He shut the door behind him, and she could hear the faint click of the lock.

"To talk."

"Uh-huh," she didn't believe him, and she crossed her arms over her chest. "Don't worry. I'm not with Stephen. If that's what you're worried about."

"Well, that is a relief." He rolled his eyes. "However, it's not the most important thing. You are going to do exactly as I say, alright?"

"Nice try."

He lunged forward, grabbing her chin in his hand, "Stop being such a smartass, Shay. It doesn't _suit_ you."

"Blond doesn't suit you either..." she muttered, shaking her head as best she could. "W-what do you want, Nick?"

"You."

"Or?"

"Or I'll march right down to catering and let everyone know just how fucked up you are, Shay." His words were fire, quick and sharp. "And everyone will leave. You're not with Stephen, and the moment he knows, will be the moment he forgets all about you. He'll leave, he doesn't want a shattered little bird, Shay." She shoved against him, or tried to. He moved his hand to rest on her shoulder.

"There is _nothing_ romantic between him and I. He already knows," she scowled, her voice bitter. Nick looked surprised, but shook it off. "Wasn't expecting that, now were you?"

"Listen, I know you, better than you think I do. You'll do anything for your friends. Sacrifice yourself for them. So, that's what I'm asking you to do." His voice, as taunting as it always was, floated in the air and she tried to let it sink in. She couldn't really make sense of it, but she knew she wouldn't like what he'd say. "Do you understand what I mean? You, and me, together. Whenever I say so-" his eyes raked over her, and she repositioned her arms.

"No." Anger flashed in his eyes and he snorted.

"Come again?"

"I said no," she replied. "I-I'm not selling myself to you, Nick."

"Hm," he smirked, leaning in to kiss her cheek. "I'll let you rethink that." Silently, he moved back across the room, unlocked the door, and left, letting it slam behind him. Startling at the sound, she sunk down to the bench and let the tears roll down her face. It was subconscious, crying was, or it felt like it. Shaking her head, she allowed herself to regain her composure. Then, just as he had, she left the locker room.

Inside, she was shaking, cracking and threatening to burst into shards.

But she couldn't let him see that.


	19. Forgiveness

**Hey everybody! How's it going? Alrighty, here's another chapter of Moth To A Flame. Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, it seriously makes my day to see your feedback. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. **

**Um, you can check my profile for more info, there's probably a notification on there that may be important. Other than that, please read, review, and enjoy! XD**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?" AJ asked, and Shay looked up, nodding. AJ smiled, tugging on Shay's sleeve and leading her away from Stephen, Bryan, and Randy. The brunette stopped though, looking over her shoulder. "I'll bring her right back boys, promise."<p>

"Take your time," Bryan chuckled. "I have a promo to get to anyway, so she's all yours."

AJ continued to lead Shay away, around a corner and down another hall. Shay sent her a bewildered look. "AJ, wh-where are we going?" She asked as AJ ducked around another corner and through a labyrinth of halls. Shay was about to ask again, but AJ stopped.

"So?"

Shay's eyebrow rose at the expectant tone in AJ's voice. "So what?"

"Are you going to that wedding with Stephen?"

"What?" What wedding? She wracked her brain trying to figure out what AJ meant. "The... the wedding in May? No. O-of course not."

AJ frowned, "Oh, I just assumed you were." AJ shrugged, "Say, what is it with you and guys?"

"AJ, you really need to start clarifying," Shay leaned against the wall, rubbing her temple with her index and middle finger.

"Well," AJ stood next to the blonde, "you seem to get along better with the guys. Some of them, at least. I-I just don't understand you, Shay." Shay chuckled, murmuring that she wasn't the only one. Shay crossed her arms over her chest and glanced at AJ, who was watching her intently. She knew why, and she sighed, shaking her head.

"I'm fine, AJ. It was just a bad night. Bad night, bad thoughts, bad timing."

"We were all really worried Shay."

"I know, AJ," Shay replied. "And I know it's something I need to sort out."

"Yeah, you do," AJ stated, rather bluntly, as she shrugged. Shay cast her another look, and she put her hands on her hips. "You didn't have to listen to Stephen, or Randy," AJ said. "Especially Stephen. He has been so stressed lately, and since that night... I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't be goading you like this."

"It's fine. I-I should get back to Stephen, we have a segment," Shay explained, waving as she returned down the hall. About halfway there, a hand rested on her shoulder and she spun around. Cody stood before her, a grin slapped on his face, and he ran a hand down her arm.

"Hey."

"Hey," she replied, fighting the urge to roll her eyes. So maybe the loss wasn't devastating, she knew she could live without the boy with the dazzling smile, but the fact that he had deceived her didn't put him on her good side. No, she was rather irritated with the man. "C-Can I help you?"

"Yeah, it's been a while, and I know I said I would never force you... but I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me tonight. After the show. You, and me." Cody smiled again, gesturing between them. "I _feel_ something, Shay. And I think it could-"

"No, Cody, it can't. Really, it just can't. There's n-nothing there, Cody. A-And, I'm flattered, but no thank you," she brushed passed him, and she continued on without looking back. Speed walking, she checked her phone for the time. She was running late... again. Cursing under her breath, she hurtled around the corner, spotting Stephen at the end of the hall, talking animatedly with Bryan. Dashing forward, she was getting closer. Her foot, however, had different plans. Snagging on a wire, she fell forward. "_Stephen!_" He glanced over, and chuckled, seeing her there on the floor. Sauntering over, he shook his head.

"Yeh alrigh'?"

"Fine," she muttered, reaching to untangle her foot. "Stupid, keeping wires out in the middle of the hallway, where anyone can trip on them."

"Wan' some help?" He asked, offering her a hand. She took it, and he pulled her up, catching her again as she stumbled. Bracing a hand on her waist, the other encircled it. "Yeh sure yer alrigh'?" He asked again, his tone slightly mocking and she nodded.

"Yeah, f-fine," she smiled, nodding as she pulled away from him. "Lucky fella," she nudged his side as they walked. "You get to kiss me again tonight."

"Nah, I think it's yeh who gets to kiss me," he turned towards her and smirked, raising a couple fingers to let her know the cameras were on them.

**[On-Screen]**

Sheamus scowled, eyes focused on the monitor that replayed Daniel's promo. "Can yeh believe it? Punk's runnin' his mouth, actin' like _he's_ the Champion."

Shay 'tsked', shaking her head as she stood beside him. "Yeah, but he'll get what's coming to him on Sunday. Right now," she smiled, resting her hand on his shoulder, "you have a match against Mark Henry. Show Daniel Bryan _just_ what he is in store for." She leaned up, pecking his cheek. "For good luck." she stated as they began down the hall.

/

"And here is your winner... Sheamus!"

Shay jumped up from her spot on commentary, grinning as she hoisted herself onto the apron and slid between the ropes. Running into his arms, she wrapped her arms around his neck, meeting his lips with a kiss. She felt his grin against her lips, and one hand came to rest on her waist. The other angled her head, holding her chin. Whoops and cheers echoed from the crowd, dying down when they parted. Taking his hand, she raised it in victory, and clapped as he turned his attention to Daniel Bryan.

**[Off-Screen] **

"People are going to start to think that you two are an actual couple," Bryan laughed, shaking his head as he walked alongside the blonde and redhead. Shay shrugged.

"I-If it gets them to stop thinking I'm sleeping with Chris," she sighed, dragging a hand through her hair and tugging the hem of her skirt down. "I-I'm going to go change. This skirt is really... really tight." Stephen nodded, and Bryan left down the hall. "So," she spoke, and he spun around to see that she was still standing there. "How's it going?"

"Good," he answered, smiling. Stephen paused for a moment and drew in a breath. "Hey, uh, Shay... I was jus' wonderin' if yeh'd go to that weddin' with me." The words left his mouth in a rush, and he noticed the panicked look that flashed across her face. "Not as a date, jus'... a friend, yeh know?"

She nodded and tucked her hands behind her back. "I-I can't, Stephen. It's not my place. Be-besides, it's in two weeks, isn't it? I-I couldn't..."

"If it's cuz' o' the schedule, I can talk ta Vince." His eyebrows knit together, and she sighed. He looked slightly hurt, and possibly frustrated. "I know it's kinda short notice."

"No, Stephen, it's not that. I-I just... it's not my place. I wouldn't belong there, and I wouldn't want my presence to start a fight."

"What if yeh comin' along meant she'd leave me alone?" Stephen questioned.

"Stephen, if the only reason you want me to go is to see if she'll finally leave you alone...," she trailed off, biting her lip for a moment. "Just, trust me Stephen, it's better if I stay. B-besides, she should leave you alone once she's married, right? It's not l-like she's going to go after you while she's married..." Shay stuttered, offering him a small smile, which quickly faded. "I-I uh... I'll see you later, Stephen."

"Alrigh'," he murmured, "Back at the hotel?"

"Yeah," she replied, walking back to the locker room. Shay changed quickly, pulling on a pair of jeans and throwing a hoodie over her shirt. Packing her stuff away, she slung the duffel bag over her shoulder and left the room. She was halfway down the hall when she saw Nick heading her way. Cursing under her breath, she glanced around. There wasn't any way to avoid him, and she wondered about her luck. She was alone, and she was around Nick, who had, for some reason, taken another liking to surveying her. He had a habit of that, of coming back when she started to put things behind her, and she wondered what it would take to get rid of him.

Pulling her hoodie over her head, she tried to hide her face as she slipped past him. To her surprise, he didn't stop, but she could hear his faint chuckle die on the air. Wrapping her arms tightly around her body, she moved as quickly as she could through the arena and to the hotel.

_Extreme Rules: Sunday night, Chicago, Illinois_

"Oh. My. God!" Shay squealed, grinning as she slung an arm over Stephen's shoulders and Bryan's. Kissing both of their cheeks, she repeated her mantra. "That was an amazing match guys! Th-that was the match you two deserved at WrestleMania!" She skipped ahead of them, turning and grinning again, running her hands through her hair. "Holy shit!"

"Jesus, who put a shot of sugar in her neck today?" Randy laughed from where he sat on an equipment box. She rolled her eyes, throwing her arms around Stephen in a hug.

"Shay, Ah'm all sweaty, an' yer wearin' a really nice dress," he replied, looking down at her. Shay shook her head, blonde curls bouncing violently over her shoulders.

"I-I don't care." She glanced down at her dress. A brilliant red, it cut across mid-thigh and had a slightly open neckline, plunging down to just below her bust. The top was wrapped, and the sleeves dropped to her forearms with slights cutting through the tops. "You were great." She kissed his cheek again before calling over her shoulder. "You too, Bryan. A-And you, Randy." Shay slid over, hugging Bryan. Randy's eyebrow rose.

"You sure you're okay?"

"F-Fine, Randy. I'm p-perfectly fine." A soft blush rolled over her cheeks "I, just... c-celebrating an amazing match. That's all."

"Well, since you're feeling so great, why don't you come out with us tonight?" Randy proposed, chuckling as Shay's eyes widened. "C'mon, Shay. It's no use just sitting around the hotel all night. Celebrate Stephen's win tonight."

"No, you just want to s-see me drunk." Shay gave him a pointed look and he shrugged.

"You better not be trying to get Shay drunk," a man laughed, and she recognized it as Chris. He came in, followed by Punk. "The last time..."

"Chris," Shay groaned, shaking her head. "No."

"Y'all ever hear the ancient, Canadian proverb 'Never give a Hart tequila?'" Chris smirked as Shay smacked at his chest. He dodged her, ducking around Punk, who was struggling to stifle a laugh. "Well, little Shay here..."

"C-Christopher... Keith Irvine, I-I am still mad at you," Shay said, eyes narrowing on the Canadian, who laughed it off, even though it was a nervous one. He nodded, throwing an arm over her shoulder and hugging her.

"Can we talk about that after the show?" He whispered, and she nodded her reply. "I have to go, so take care." He ruffled her hair and went off with Punk. She returned to Stephen's side, and he gave her a look.

"What happens with yeh an' tequila?" Stephen laughed, planting his hands on his hips as he stared at the shorter woman. "Do yer clothes come off?"

"Uh... you will never find out," she replied. "So, what's this plan about going out tonight?"

"Yeh don't have ta," he shrugged, walking with her. "We were jus' goin' ta go the the club dontown. Ignore Bryan, yeh can jus' stay at the hotel."

"No, I-I want to come," she smiled, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "A-And I'm pretty much dressed for the occasion." Shay gestured down to herself, and his eyes followed. Stephen nodded, running his hand through his hair before placing it on her shoulder.

"I'll see yeh in a little while, okay?"

Shay nodded in confirmation as Stephen disappeared down the hall. A while later, she found herself seated at a table in the bar, sipping on a water while several of her coworkers mingled around her. Someone slid into the seat across from her, and she lifted her eyes to meet theirs. "C-Chris... hi," she smiled.

Chris smiled back, sucking in a breath. "I, uh... wanted to talk."

"I remember," Shay said, fanning her hair over her shoulder. "You wanted to talk about what you did, or, more appropriately, didn't do."

"Yeah, I know it was wrong, but you have to believe that I didn't do anything. I really didn't. I... I wanted to, you have no idea how much I wanted to."

"Then why didn't you?"

"I already told you this, Shay. I saw how happy he made you, how much you smiled around him... and I just couldn't take that away. I couldn't. If I took you away from him, or vice versa, you would've gone back into your shell, and after you had just come out of it, it wouldn't have been fair. I wanted you to be happy, and that's why I didn't do anything."

Shay nodded, trying to understand what he was saying. "You..." she trailed off, "you loved me. W-why?"

He sighed, shaking his head as a low chuckle slipped past his lips. "It wasn't something I really planned on doing, Shay. But yeah, I loved you, and sometimes I regret telling you. Nick's right. I do blame myself, and I wonder how you couldn't. You never blamed me for what happened, and... and that's—I just couldn't understand why you never blamed me." She rested a hand on his.

"Why would I blame you for something that wasn't your fault? Besides, you got what you wanted, why weren't you happy?" She questioned and he nodded, wincing as she asked.

"It was something I said, something I did that almost killed you. Had I not told you, had I kept my..." he paused for a moment, "feelings in check, then this never would've happened, and you'd be happy right now. You'd be happy, and probably be the one marrying John in a couple of months. Happy? How could I be happy when someone I loved was in pain?" Chris shook his head. "I'm sorry you and John broke up, you loved each other, and it was a shame that you two broke up. But, this could be the open window, Shay. I saw you around John, and it's nothing compared to the woman across from me. You're better now than you were before John, and with John. You're more yourself now than you were when you were yourself around John."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Her eyebrows shot up. "A-and how am I supposed to know that's true if I'm not even sure of who I am?"

"Walk with me?" He cut her off, but she nodded and got up, following him outside. They walked along the sidewalk, and he shoved his hands into his pockets. "You're right. It's just... I remember the Shay you were way before John, and Nick, and Dave. And I want to see her again, full time. Not the here today gone tomorrow facade that tends to surface. She was a pretty amazing woman, and sometimes I see her in the hall, in catering, in the hotel, walking down the street," he laughed at the expression on her face, "Sorry, you get the point. You may not realize it yet, because you've become so used to hiding. Hey, stop giving me that look," he stated, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Chris..."

"Sorry, overstepping my boundaries, but listen to me, alright? I'm sorry. It may not mean much, but I am. And I love you, and I want you to be happy, even if it isn't with me."

Shay smiled, nodding slightly. "I'm not though. Happy, that is." She turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. Returning the embrace, he rested his chin on her head. "But thank you, Chris."

"Are we... cool?" He cracked a smile, and she chuckled. Nodding again, she let out a shaky breath.

"Yeah, we're cool."


	20. A California Dream

**Hey everybody, here we are with another chappie! Wohooo! Can I get a holler? No? Alrighty then...Anywho, I only own Shay. I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors, and I think you all should know that I don't know when the next update will be. It should be within the next two weeks, or so, but I can't make any promises. I can tell that school's about to get crazy; it's almost time for finals O.O. So, I'll see you next time...  
><strong>**Yerp, I think that's pretty much it. I'm continuing to plan a new story that should be up sometime soon. I just want to get MTAF on its way before I try juggling two stories. So please read, review, and enjoy. Reviews are love, and I love to hear your feedback! XD**

**Love, Kiwi  
>P.S. I have nothing against California, so I apologize if it seems that way in a couple parts of the chapter.<strong>

* * *

><p>Stephen scowled, tucking the tux into a garment bag and checking his jeans pocket for his plane ticket. It wasn't there, and he peeked around the wall separating the bathroom from the main part of the hotel room. Spotting the ticket on the table next to the door, he reached for it.<p>

"What are you d-doing up so early?" A groggy voice mumbled, and he heard the rustling of a bedspread. "S-Stephen?"

"Early fligh'," he replied, sending her a smile as he turned to face her. "What are yeh doing up so early? It's four in the mornin', Shay."

"Couldn't sleep," she muttered, dragging a hand through her tousled locks. Getting up, she walked over to the table across from the beds. Chuckling, she gestured towards the mass array of ties strewn about the surface. "Couldn't decide on a tie?"

"Nah, I was lookin' for a specific one, an' I found it at the bottom. It's a simple weddin'; black an' white."

Shay's nose scrunched up and she shook her head. "One thing I can't stand are plain weddings. I-I know it's more of a personal taste, but I would have to have some sort of color." She commented, crossing her arms over her chest. He stood beside her, standing in a similar stance.

"Tell me, what's yer _ideal_ weddin'?"

"Stephen," she began, "I'm not even ready to date someone yet, I don't think I should be worrying about a wedding."

"Good ta know yeh accepted that, but why? Are yeh still in love with somebody else?" He asked, watching her reaction intently. Her shoulders seemed to tense, and she bit her lip. Shaking her head, she softly denied the implication, and glanced back at him.

"With who? John? N-no. John and I have been over since the beginning of 2011. Trust me, I-I'm over him," Shay replied, picking up a tie and folding it. She did the same to another, plucking them out of the pile. "I-I guess I'm just happy being single."

"Maybe yeh've jus' given up," Stephen stated. "Which, honestly, I probably wouldn't blame yeh for, but, personally, I think it'd be a mistake. Giving up, that is." Her eyebrow cocked, and Shay slowly nodded her head. He frowned as her eyes fell directly on to his, and he muttered a curse under his breath.

"Are you okay? Going to this wedding?" Shay asked, her hand resting on his arm. "I know it's been a while, but it's still tough, isn't it? I-I remember you telling me about it. Do you think that he'd still marry her if he knew?" He ignored the question, but shrugged and grabbed his coat. "St-Stephen?"

"Listen, Shay, I really gotta go. I won' be back til late," Stephen stated as he adjusted his hat and took the garment bag in one hand. He opened the door and was halfway out of it when he glanced back at her. "Don' wait up for me, alrigh'?"

"W-well, since you asked so nicely," she rolled her eyes, smiling slightly as he chuckled.

"_Please_ don't wait up for me," he repeated and she nodded. "I'll see yeh later, Shay." He gave a slight nod and pulled the door shut behind him. Once his footsteps had faded, she grabbed a change of clothes and retreated to the shower. She had her own place to be that day, and she didn't want to miss her own flight.

/

Shay walked out of the gate, and her hand instinctively shot up to block her face from the sun. Briefly, she wondered if she should have even come, but it was far too late to turn back now. A good price on a ticket and a nearly six-hour flight was behind her, the safe hotel room she had departed from this morning even farther behind. No, now that she was here, she would do what she had come here to do.

She left the airport and caught a cab, directing it about a block from where she actually wanted to go. Then, she began walking. Shay took in the smells; a flower here or there, the faint stench of exhaust, and all the smells she had forgotten existed here in Los Angeles. The place seemed to suck her in and trap her there. Dave lived here, as did John, and she had resided with both of them. Silently, she swore that this would be the last time, save for her job, and the upcoming wedding, that she would ever find herself here. Continuing down the sidewalk, she found the door she was looking for. Climbing the steps, Shay approached the door. Shay raised a hand to knock, and, in a moment of brief self-doubt, she almost turned back.

She was doing this for herself, not the man on the other side of the door. Clearing her throat, she gathered a breath and rapped on the door. From somewhere deep in the house, she heard his voice calling out. Then, there was the padding of footsteps before the door slid open, and he stood there, grinning. His gaze settled on her, his expression almost faltering, as if he had seen a ghost.

"Shay," the name left his lips and it scorched her. It felt weird to hear it, especially from him. They hadn't spoken in months, and the way he looked at her with that forlorn tint in his eyes. He lurched forward, as if to hug her. Hesitance flashed in his face, and he stopped, stepped back and apologized. She murmured that it was alright and his arm swept out, gesturing towards the house. "Come in."

Shay did, almost tentatively, and stood in the center of the room. The house was how she had remembered it, the kitchen far off in the back, the large sitting room to her left, and a dining room to her right. Closing her eyes, brief flashes of the times she had spent here ricocheted behind her eyes. But she didn't miss it, not necessarily. This place was a reminder, a part of her past that she was planning on leaving behind for good. As if by memory, she made her way to the living room and stood while he brushed off the coffee table and one of the sofas. He apologized, again, this time for the mess. Scattered around the table were swatches of colors, telephone numbers, and an extra invitation. Sweeping the items into his arms, he opened a drawer, haphazardly shoved the items in and quickly shut the drawer. Gesturing to the seat behind her, he gave her a smile. "You can sit down, if you want. Um," he fumbled over the words, "would you like something to drink? Eat?" Shay shook her head and sat down, and he sat across from her. He chuckled nervously, and she folded her hands in her lap. "How are you? This is a surprise, I-I wasn't expecting you, Shay."

"I know," she whispered. "I just...I came here for a reason, John."

"Mel's out, trying on her um...dress for the last time before the wedding." His smile faltered again, but it quickly returned. "What do you need?"

"I wanted t-to talk to you," Shay said, and John looked like he was starting to worry. "You know, catch up?"

"You can catch up on the phone, Shay. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to hop a flight to Cali." John shrugged.

"There are things that need to be said in person, John. I-I... we never talked about what happened."

"Because you wouldn't hear me out," he stated, running a hand through his hair.

She shot him a pointed look. "No. I-I just wouldn't let you pull me in again."

"But _why_? People make mistakes all the time, Shay. All the time. And they get second chances, they fix things. Shay... I loved you, so much it hurt. What we had was brilliant, we made each other perfect. Just because I made a little mistake, doesn't mean we wouldn't have been able to be together, Shay."

She felt her skin grow hot as he spoke. It sounded like he was pinning everything on her, as if she had given up on him. Alright, so she had cut off the relationship, but she had damn good reason to. "Y-you cheated on me, John. You call that a 'little mistake'? Figures, something happens and it's never your fault."

"I only cheated because I misunderstood, alright? You know I never would've done it."

"You didn't _trust_ me, John. You didn't trust me. Chris was just my friend, and I never saw it as anything more than that." She wasn't sure when she stood, but she did, and her hands were planted on her hips.

"You can't blame me for thinking it, though." His voice snapped, but she didn't flinch like she thought she would.

"Alright, maybe not. You could've, oh, I dunno, _talked_ to-to me about it." Shay shook her head, folding her arms over her chest. She sighed, sitting back down and muttering an apology. Playing with the hem of her shirt, she glanced up at him. "I-I think... I don't think we would've worked out anyway, John."

That really caught his attention, and a slight panic edged into his voice. "What? What are you talking about? Of course we would've, had I not been so stupid. We would've been per-"

"We never fought, John." Shay stated simply. She hadn't imagined it being this... this awkward. Sitting here, in his house, talking about the past... it didn't feel right. This wasn't where she belonged. "Y-you were afraid to bring anything up that would upset me... and that would've eventually been our downfal. I-I fight, argue, with the others. Never you though. Never...you." She knew she wanted to say something, and she felt the words tumble from her heart and through her mouth. "It's alright to argue once in a while. I-I think you were afraid to hurt me."

"I was a little afraid you would leave me, but I always thought that you wouldn't leave, because you'd be worried you'd never find love again. I wanted it to work between us, Shay." John sighed, and she focused her attention to the window. A bird fluttered in the air, calling out as it swooped by. She wanted to be out there right now, away from this tiny little cage. She wanted to spread her wings and fly, leaving the swinging cage door behind her. Then, her eyes settled on him. He was tan, as he had always been, and donned a tank top and jogging pants. Dark sunglasses perched on his crown, and the faint odor of sea salt drifted towards her nose. He surfed, he acted, his smile was stark white in comparison to his complexion. He, the man standing before her, was the stereotypical image of California chiseled into a god-like physique. He commanded attention.

"C-California Dream...," she murmured, remembering the words Stephen had used before. John's eyebrow raised at her, and he shot her a compelling smile. Had she not known him, it would've dragged her in. A sharp laugh burst from her mouth and she shook her head. "You really are something, John." Shay smiled, standing and brushing off her jeans.

"Wait," he called after her as she made her way to the door. "Can we just..." John stopped, gazing at her intently. His jaw dropped slightly as he traced over the scar on her jawline with his index finger. She glanced down, seeing that his eyes also took in the one on her chest. It peeked out over the neckline of her shirt. Her hand instantly went to her neck, blocking his view. "I-I did that to you?"

"The ones on my leg are worse," she stated. "A-are you done?"

"Are you seeing anyone?" He ignored her question, and she fought the urge to roll her eyes. She shook her head, but her mind went straight towards Stephen. "It's been a year, Shay."

"I-I haven't found anyone yet, h-how's Melina?"

"Good," John shoved his hands into his pockets. "We decided on gold and red for the wedding. She's um... she's stressed, but it'll be beautiful. A lot of people are going to be there. We've both moved on, haven't we?" John seemed to wince and Shay nodded.

"One more than the other, it seems," she murmured, and he sighed.

"I'm in love with Mel," he stated adamantly, as if he needed to prove it, to cement it as reality. "And I'm still in love with you." He confessed, eyes casting towards the ground. Shay shook her head, nearly scowling and wondering where all this was coming from. John had noticed that she had changed, she saw the acknowledgment in his eyes, and the slight admiration.

"Then it's too bad I don't reciprocate the feelings," she said, and his eyes swarmed with confusion.

"What the hell, Shay? What happened to you?" John threw up his hands as she reached for the doorknob.

"Somebody pulled me out of a pity party," Shay replied curtly, giving him a slight wave and a smile. "Congratulations on your engagement, and I will be joining you in the festivities. Until then, have a great day, John." She shut the door behind her and made her way back down the street, a smile spreading across her face. Then, she returned to the airport, John's confession in the back of her mind.

/

When she got back to the hotel, it was nearly nine o'clock, and she flung herself onto her bed with a small 'oomph'. Rolling on to her back, she kicked off her shoes. She grabbed the remote and turned on the TV, watching the mindless shows that followed. Yawning, she shut her eyes, choosing to rest and listen, rather than watch. Besides, Stephen would be back shortly, and he had said not to wait on him.

A few, short hours later, the door to the hotel room opened. She had long since turned the TV off, having taken a liking to the slight buzz of the city. One eye cracked open to see a form in the doorway. He sighed, and didn't turn on the light. Shay noted the shuffle of his feet; he was trying to make as little noise as possible. He thought she was asleep. Stephen turned too sharply, slamming his hip, or so she guessed, into the corner of the table.

"Aw, fuck," he cursed, loudly at first, but then quieter the second time around. "Shit..." She felt his stare. She didn't stir, and he muttered, "Yeh know, fer an insomniac, yer a pretty heavy sleeper."

"That's because I wasn't sleeping," she replied, sitting up. She could see his faint outline, the glow of his skin against the moonlight that cast in through the window. He nodded, flicking on the light.

"I thought I told yeh not to wait." He was angry, she could hear it under false bemusement.

She shrugged, swinging her legs over the bed and standing up. "I couldn't sleep. So, how was the wedding?" She asked, nodding towards him. He had loosened his tie, his cuffs, and had the top few buttons of his shirt undone. He shrugged out of the blazer and draped it over the back of the desk chair. Stephen smiled and shook his head, chuckling as he did so. Shay's eyebrow rose as his smile turned into a scowl.

Shay nearly jumped as he thumped his hand against the wall. Fury, blind, raging fury burned in his eyes and he tore a hand back through his hair. Stephen's shoulders shook as he clenched and unclenched his fists. The question formed on her lips, and she almost asked it, but he cut her off.

"Damn bastard _knew_," he whispered, his fist poised to pound against the wall. Again, she was about to ask, but he spun towards her, and she finally saw his anger. Rage, sorrow..._betrayal_. His accent dripped more heavily than usual, and his voice was rising. "He fuckin' knew, Shay. This entire time, an' he knew. He knew Ah loved her, an' he didn' even care."

She knew what he was talking about, but the question fled from her mouth. "Wh-what?"

Stephen's eyes fell onto her, meeting directly with hers, and he softened a bit. Shaking his head, he rubbed his face. "He knew, he knew tha' Ah knew abou' the affair. An' he still married her. Damn strong love tha' must be." Spite and sarcasm lingered on his words and she fumbled forward, latching on to his forearm to steady herself.

"I-I...," she shook her head, deciding on a better set of words. "Do you want to talk about it." Her voice was barely audible, and he didn't acknowledge it. Instead, he turned and deftly kicked the edge of her suitcase.

"He kept it goin', an' he didn' even care," Stephen stopped and sat down on the bed, removing his shoes. Gingerly, she sat beside him. "An' yeh wanna know the wors' part?" Rhetorical? Probably, but she nodded anyway and offered the most reassuring smile she could. "He invited me, 'cause he was gonna rub it in me face. An', the fact tha' he stole my girl didn' even really matter anymore. He jus' though' he came out the winner. Ah'm not necessarily mad tha' he took her, naw... those wounds healed a long time ago. Ah'm mad 'cause I was betrayed." Stephen shook his head. "An' they're happily married." He turned his gaze towards hers, softening as she smiled and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

"Given up on love yet?" She asked, half-joking.

"Startin' ta." He shrugged, and she sighed.

"Think on the bright side... you're finally rid of her."

"Yeah, she did tell me I 'missed my chance'."

"She's dumb," Shay concluded, giving Stephen a light pat on the chest. "Doesn't know what she's missing."

"Ah fel' really outta place, Shay," he stated and she shrugged.

"If it makes you feel any better, I felt out of place today. Let's just say... C-California and I were never a good pair. I-I went to California today, to talk to John."

"Yeh wen' ta California? While Ah was out, yeh took off to California? Wha' did John say?"

"We just talked, really," Shay said,"and I realized you were right. You're not a California Dream, and I'm kinda glad." She chuckled and he ended up grinning.

"Shay," he began, pivoting to face her, "Ah...Ah'm sorry for how horrible I was ta yeh, way back when."

"Hey," she gently shoved his shoulder, "don't worry about it. I wasn't exactly the nicest either." Shay smiled, standing up and going over to her suitcase. She gathered up a pair of sweats and a tank top before retreating to the bathroom. By the time she returned to the room, Stephen was already laying down, the covers half-covering his chest. Laying down on her own bed, she stifled a yawn. "Blue."

"What is it yer goin' on about?"

"You asked me earlier what color I wanted at my wedding. Blue." She turned to face him. He smiled. "I like blue. H-hey, Stephen?"

"Do yeh wan' me ta tell yeh another story?" His eyebrow arched and she nodded.

"I-If it's not too much trou-"

He only laughed and sat up, flicking on the bedside lamp as he scooted over. Patting the open spot, he motioned for her to come over. She did, tucking her legs close to her body as she watched him intently, hanging on to the words as they left his mouth. Her eyelids grew heavy, and she rested her head against his shoulder. She did have a dream, though, and it was a pleasant surprise. And, it wasn't California.


	21. The Truth Doesn't Always Make It Easier

**Hey guys, this will be the last update before school lets out, because this upcoming week will be entirely too hectic for me to get any sort of writing done. But hey, at least I updated now. :) I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, I love you all. XD Thank you, and enjoy. :D**

**Please leave a review.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"Hey, Shay!" AJ grinned, skipping up to the blond on the equipment box. "Would you look at that, they gave you pants!" The brunette patted Shay's denim-clad knee.<p>

"Yeah," Shay laughed. "I-I haven't actually _changed_ yet," she said, fiddling with her bracelet. "I think I'm just going to not wear it."

"Really?" AJ seemed surprised. "You pull them off though. You're hot, Shay, in a totally festive, non-lesbian manner, and I think you should just accept it and move on." AJ shrugged, sitting next to Shay. "Why not?" AJ paused, "I-I mean, why aren't you wearing the dress."

"I hate the color they chose, and I-I just...no. And, I'm kinda feeling a little lazy," she said, shaking her head as she looked down at herself. "Besides, they want me comfortable... this is comfortable."

AJ just nodded, "I get to wear pants at PPVs." The brunette stuck her tongue out at the blonde, who playfully shoved her. "Hey look, it's the Nerd Herd." Shay looked up to where AJ was pointing, and nearly busted out laughing as Chris, Punk, and Bryan walked up. Their eyebrows rose as they looked at the shaking blonde.

Shay regained her composure, "Um...sorry. I-I, um...hi." She felt her cheeks grow hot, and she buried her face in her hands. "S-so, how's it going?"

"Pretty good," Punk laughed, "What's so funny?"

"N-Nothing, I-I just thought of something... and yeah," She felt her phone buzz in her pocket, and she dug it out, glancing at the screen.

_New Text ~ Nick_

Cursing in her mind, she dragged a hand through her hair and pulled a smile to her face. Clicking to open it, she quickly read it. _Locker room—30 minutes._ She sighed, shaking her head at her phone and returning it to her pocket. Maybe, if she arrived early, it'd be over with faster. What would Nick want with her anyway?

Her mind flashed back to the incident a few weeks ago, and she suddenly felt sick. What would be the consequences of not going? The last time she didn't do what he had asked, he struck her, and that had been a misunderstanding. What would it be now, now that it was open defiance, and she had nowhere to hide? She glanced down at her trembling hand, and she gripped her wrist in efforts to settle herself. Sliding off the box, Shay tucked her arms behind her. "I-I should... I should go," she cleared her throat.

She tried to evade them, but Chris's eyes followed her like a hawk, "Where?"

"Um, I'm meeting a friend."

"All your friends are here," Chris pointed out, and she cast him a look. He shrugged, "It's true, for the most part."

"I-I'm a big girl, I can handle myself," Shay replied, crossing her arms over her chest. "I-I'll see you all later." She gave a slight nod as she walked away, wishing she had at least told someone where she was actually going. Chris would've stopped her, and AJ would've given her a disapproving, almost fearful look, and possibly prevent her from going; landing her into a deeper mess with Nick. Shay walked until she saw the abnormally blond mass of hair heading in her direction.

He looked disapprovingly at her, as if inspecting her for any faults, and she felt her arms wrap around her tighter. Then, he smirked, an expression that seemed to suit him perfectly, as he linked arms with her, and led her into a nearby locker room. The area was desolate, there was still a couple of hours before the PPV, and he had made sure there wouldn't be anybody near. "Shay, Shay, Shay," he tsked, leaning towards her as he ran his fingers down her arm. "You came."

"What do you what?" She gritted her teeth, choking down the shudder that threatened her words. Nick moved closer to her.

"You know what I want," his lips grazed her neck, and she squirmed. "C'mon, Shay. It's either this, or your reputation." He gestured to himself, as if he were a showcase prize and she was a fortunate soul to have such an opportunity. "People already think you're petty... figuring out how _low_ will only increase this little pity party you have going for you. Is that what you want," he whispered, his lips hovering at her ears. She swallowed her warbled sound that was threatening to spill from her throat, wondering where she had agreed to his arrangements. "I want you, Shay."

"You want a conquest...t-to prove that you didn't lose. You don't want me, a-and, quite frankly, your game is getting stale," she replied, reminding herself why she didn't want word of Dave and John leaking out. It would cause a mess, a horrendous mess that no one would allow her to clean up. Besides, people seemed quite content with the rumors Nick had circulated.

Nick smirked, "I think I liked you better when you didn't resist, Shay." He slipped a hand to her waist, tugging her closer to his body. Her hands grappled, clinging to his shoulder to stabilize herself. "This will hurt a lot less if you just submit."

Why was she even here? The question reverberated through her mind, landing on the conclusion that he had asked, and defiance of his demands led to far worse consequences than compliance. His lips landed on hers, and had it not been for his grip on her, she would've recoiled. She shouldn't have been afraid of him, after all this time.

But he had shown her, so many times before, that she was nothing more than a pawn to him; a plain little piece of a larger picture, something he could cast away at will, and still have complete control over. He told her to move, and she would obey. A pawn to a patriarch, and she just wanted to be free of him. After all this, he still had a tiny piece of her, one of the many shards she had lost along the way. One of the many shards she had set to retrieve, she decided.

"You told Stephen about Dave," Nick muttered, lips barely leaving hers. "I heard him in the locker room once. He was pretty pissed, from what I could understand."

Stephen. What would he think if he knew where she was now? Knowing she had submitted, crumbled again beneath pressure... she could only imagine his disgust. Giving in to Nick now meant retreating back to square one; letting him know the power he held. Power, she believed, didn't belong to him. She had come so far, so desperately close to the freedom she had desired from Nick, that being with him now was only proving his point. Letting him inside her mind was parasitic. Him, a bitter, tiny little parasite feeding upon a weak and brittle host. And letting him be the patriarch only proved her a pawn.

"L-Let go of me, Nick."

"No."

And so she pushed, bracing her hands against her chest and shoving him backwards. He slid back, almost tripping on the bench. Anger settled in his eyes, and he tried to mask it with amusement. "What are you doing?"

"I-I'm not...I'm not doing this, Nick." He charged at her, and she held her ground, barely flinching as he clenched his fist around her wrist.

"I will march straight to catering...," he began, and she shook her head.

"I don't care." The words left her mouth like wildfire, and she was nearly startled by it herself. His eyes widened—his expression faltering as he tried to regain his composure. How three tiny words had dented his shell was almost rewarding. She spun on her heels, hand reaching for the doorknob. "It's not worth it." She left the locker room, her arms instinctively wrapping around her stomach. She heard the door slam again, and the echo of footsteps behind her. He called out her name, and she pretended she didn't hear him.

As she had predicted, defying him would more than likely lead to a greater consequence, but, for some reason, she wasn't sure if she cared. Her phone vibrated in her pocket, and she smiled slightly.

_New Text ~ Jay: Hey Snow Bird, uh, I'm sorry. I'm in catering with the guys. There's a seat waiting for you, should you choose to accept it._

She remembered the fight they had gotten into, and how they both had left it unresolved. He had soon gotten reinjured, and both felt it best to let the other cool off for a while. Shay replied, slipping her phone back into her pocket as Nick came up behind her. She could hear the buzz of catering, knowing that now it would be full of Superstars and Divas. If she could make it to her seat before Nick had the chance to say anything, he'd more than likely leave it alone. "A-And what do you plan on saying?" She asked.

"The truth."

"And to think I almost thought you forgot the definition," Shay said, shaking her head as she rounded a corner. There, far off at the end of the hall, was the opening to catering. Breaking out in a run would surely result in a face plant, and invoke the sense that something was wrong.

"He cheated on you," Nick whispered, smirking at the tension that sprung into her shoulders.

"I think you should mention what you did, Nick. Give them the _whole_ story. People hate plot holes."

"And what, ruin my reputation? No."

"I-If that's what you wish." Shay sighed as they reached catering. She maneuvered her way through the tables, searching for where Jay was. She found him, his eyes meeting hers with a smile, and was on her way over. Then, she paused, glancing over her shoulder. Nick was no longer following her. No, his gaze bore into hers, a smirk casting across his face as he climbed onto a table. Randy, Cody, Alberto, and Ricardo had been enjoying a meal, until Nick had interrupted. He grabbed a cup and a spoon, clanking them together and calling for their attention.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you, Shay Hart!" He gestured to her, and she shifted her weight from foot to foot. She looked back at Jay, the worried look that never seemed to leave his eye, and Stephen, whose hand tightened into a fist. Silence befell the area, and she felt the eyes resting on her in curiosity."

"C'mon, Nick. Her birthday was in February," John Cena laughed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Nick ignored him, "Shay Hart, daughter of Bret "The Hitman" Hart. Cousin to Nattie, one in a legacy, but do any of you really know her? Aside from her pity crew?"

"Nick," Randy began, "get down."

"Just, let me finish. Trust me, it'll be worth your while. This pathetic excuse for a woman is far more fucked up than any of you will believe. Do you remember Dave, Shay? Of course you do, you're not stupid. She just got by on not saying anything."

Out of the corner of her eye, Shay say Jay move to get up. She raised a hand to stop him, and returned her attention to Nick. "How does it feel to know that you were gullible enough to believe his lies. How he always was sorry for _every single time_ he put you back into place? All the small things you did that just pissed him off, and you were his outlet. The funny thing is, that people believed the bullshit stories you told them. Such a goddamn klutz that he could get away with the abuse. You didn't fall and fracture an ankle, he pushed you." Nick paused, letting his words sink in. "But people expect you to fall, and you deliver every single time. You inflicted worry on all your friends. But you were too afraid—too selfish to seek help until someone made you."

Shay spun around to see Stephen standing closely behind her. "S-Stephen. Just...sit down, alright?"

"Tha' lil' fu-"

"Stephen, I want to hear what he has to say," she relayed calmly, trying to hide the quaver in her voice. He stopped, contemplating, before he retreated. Shay gestured for Nick to continue, figuring that this was the best, and most graceful, way of leaving.

"You done? Anyone else want to interfere?" Nick ran a hand through his hair. Shay sighed as he continued, going on and on about Dave and how clueless everyone else was. She stood, pulling the mask she had carefully constructed over the years back over her face. She wouldn't let him see how this affected her, he didn't deserve the notion. She briefly noticed the people around her; shocked faces, some shaking heads in disbelief, and glares. Phil, she could tell from here, was glaring. "I'll say this once to get it off the plate, Shay never slept with Chris."

"We already knew that, asshole." Shay fought back the chuckle that rose in her throat, noting that she'd have to thank Nattie later.

Nick faltered for a moment, but quickly recovered the ground he'd lost. "Let's, uh... let's talk about John Hennigan. You all know John, right? Good guy? Or is he? Little Shay over here is a scarred, petty remnant. Let me tell you a story, it's beautiful, really. Shay is discharged from the hospital that Dave put her into, and she returns to the WWE. Then, she met John, and they fall in love. Aww," he cooed, "how sweet."

"N-Nick...," Shay began, casting her attention towards Stephen, "not this." He merely chuckled, shaking his head and muttering something about how indecisive she was.

"And what happens? Your world crashed down. You were always faithful; you could never cheat on a soul—but he thought you did. He misunderstood what happened. Chris told you he loved you, and you had to shoot him down because you just didn't feel the same way. John overheard, gasp, and he jumped to conclusions. Fast forward forty-five minutes, and you walked in on him and Michelle. Broken. Everything went downhill from there. The next day he called you, begged you to see him, and you went along. Bet you wish you hadn't, right? Considering what happens next." Nick took a breath, standing triumphantly, and ignoring the looks he was given. "He decided he wanted to go for a drive, and he crashed the car. And you almost didn't make it. And now, you're plagued with insomnia, nightmares when you do sleep, and you're more screwed up than ever. This place, Shay, is a pity party for you. You actually think these people give a rat's ass about you? Shay, you don't belong here."

Shay cringed as he spoke, shaking her head as he finished. "A-Are you done?" Her voice shook slightly, and she turned to face her friends. They didn't step in, the understood this was her battle to fight. Shay straightened her posture and headed straight towards Nick. "Y-You're forgetting something, Nick."

"And what's that?" He seemed confident, maybe too confident.

"Y-you're the bastard that started it all. You're the sad, sad little boy that got off on seeing me suffer. I-I would've never put you through this—berating you in front of your co-workers just to see you squirm," she said, swallowing the tears that were burning at her throat. She knew, without a doubt, that she'd break down soon, and that was something she couldn't afford right now. She felt that she should've been the one to tell them, had she believed it to be their business. It wasn't. They didn't need to know, and he had exploited her. She felt the eyes staring into her, the murmur of voices building questions that drowned her mind.

"Is it true?" Phil stood, hands on his hips, and she could finally see how visibly pissed he was.

"Yea—," Nick began, but was cut off by Punk.

"I asked her; I don't even want to look at you. Shay?" He asked again, softer this time. Shay whimpered, coughing as she made her way through the crowd. Their murmurs followed her, and she squeezed her eyes shut.

"Y-yeah," she stated. "It's true. N-now, if you don't mind, I have a PPV to get ready for." Shay left, ignoring the all too familiar Irish accent following her.

"Shay!" His fingers brushed her shoulder and she spun around, tears glistening her eyes. "I-I'm sorry."

"I told you it was him that messed up."

"Ah know, an', he cheated on yeh," Stephen murmured, scratching the back of his head.

Shay snorted, unable to stop the shudders from wracking her shoulders. "W-why do you s-s-sound so surprised?"

"Ah don' see why anyone would wanna cheat on yeh," Stephen stated as he shrugged his shoulders. "Speakin' o' which, Ah could go an' kill 'em fer yeh. Ah'm sure Ah wouldn' be the only one."

"No thanks," she chuckled. "Stephen?" Her tone withered, and she bit her lip. "Can we please not talk about this?"

"Later?"

"Yes," Shay said, stuffing her hands into her pockets as she shut her eyes to prevent the tears from falling.

"Yeh promise?"

"Yes," Shay replied, giving him the best smile she could muster. Shay knew he wasn't entirely convinced, but relished in the fact that he hadn't asked her if she was okay. Stephen smiled, putting an arm over her shoulders.

"Good, now, we have a match ta get ready for. An' Shay," he paused, and she pivoted to face him. He looked serious, and she realized just how seriously he must've taken all those things Nick said. "Yeh deserve so much better than any o' them."

"Because they're superheroes, right?"

"Because it's the truth," he stated, and she glanced away. She felt so heavy, like her back was laden with layer after layer of metal. At first she believed Nick running his mouth would be relieving, but she felt almost worse than she had before. She needed somewhere quiet and alone, and there, as they began walking towards the locker room, it came to her.

She needed to get away. She needed to go home.


	22. A Life to Live

**Ok, here's Moth to a Flame! School's out for the summer, and I'm planning on really hitting hard with this. I only own Shay, and this chapter isn't beta'd, so I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors. This chapter is half filler, half stuff, so... yeah. Thank you all who are reviewing/have reviewed. I love you all and I hope your lives are treating you well. Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"I just wanted to make sure you were okay." The words left the man's lips and Shay glanced back at him. He was surrounded by two others, all of which expressed the same worry. <em>Great<em>, she murmured in her head. She was the cause of the worry. She was the weak one, again. She was the one attracting attention, again. _Again, again, again._

"I-I can assure you I'm fine," she muttered. It was a lie. She didn't feel fine, and she was sure she was far from okay. How did one handle being picked to pieces in front of dozens of coworkers? She knew that the moment this PPV was over, she'd be heading on her way to catch a red eye to Calgary. Just after she returned from the Fatal 4-Way, Randy, Chris, and Jay had approached her.

"Shay," Randy began, "you can talk to us, you know that, right?"

"O-Of course," she pushed a smile to her face. "I-I'll see you guys later, alright?" She brushed past them, but Jay caught her arm. Shay offered another weak smile, and he nodded. Silently, he pulled her into a hug and rubbed her back. His arm rested around her, and he kissed her forehead. Releasing her, he brushed her hair out of her face. "I-I'll call you later, Jay."

He only nodded, returning to his friends as she walked away. She avoided the people backstage as much as she could, going as far as slipping out a side door and circling around to the front. She hailed a cab—Stephen was her ride—and soon found herself on a plane, leaving North Carolina behind.

/

Shay sighed, rearranging the photos on her mantle for the tenth time that day. Satisfied with the array, she retreated to the couch and relaxed. A steady swishing sound interrupted her thoughts, and before she knew it, an extra weight found itself on her stomach. "Jericho," she grinned, pulling the cat into her arms as she scratched behind the cat's ears. "How's my little man doing?" The cat meowed, leaped from her arms, and scampered out of the room. Rolling her eyes, she curled up on the couch, her eyes falling on the piano in the corner. It had been a while since she had played, and she chalked it up to not being home.

This house was as close to home as she would get. Nothing could touch her here unless she let it. It was as close a haven as she could get. She left the arena, leaving nothing but a voice mail on Stephen's cell, asking him not to worry and stressing that she was fine. Apparently, he had spread the message because no one came in to cart her away yet. Either that, or they accepted that she needed to be alone for a while. The sun shone through the window, casting light on her floor and over her. Pulling the curtain back, she smiled at the vast green space around her, and the blooming flowers sprinkling her lawn. It was gorgeous, it was spring, and it was hope. Renewal was there, the return of foliage after winter, and she was staring into the heart of it.

Then why did she feel so hopeless?

Nick, that was why. Although, she did give herself props to telling him off in catering. But she still felt hurt, partially because she knew that tossing all that information in the air was dangerous. Nick had his shot at her, he dug his vicious talons into her skin and left her for the vultures. Now, anyone could get at her; because everyone knew what she had wanted to keep secret. She was afraid of returning to the arena, and she hated herself for the fear.

"Why do I have to be so freaking afraid of everything? Huh, Jericho?" Shay asked, reaching out for the cat, but he darted away. "C'mon, Jericho." Shay stood, brushing off her jeans as she heard the door open and shut, followed by hissing.

"He doesn't like me," a voice said dejectedly, and she spun to face the blond man.

"A-Adam?" She ran a hand through her hair. "What are you doing here?"

"Randy called me," he admitted, and she shook her head. "Hey, he was worried, and he wouldn't tell me what happened. He just said that you disappeared back to Canada, and that he knew you needed someone there. He may not know much about you, but at least he's..."

"Doing what you asked?" Shay asked, crossing her arms over her chest. "I-I'm sorry," she said, moving forward to hug Adam. He returned the gesture.

"I knew something was wrong." He whispered. "What happened, Shay?" She cleared her throat and offered him a seat. Sitting beside him, she repeated what had happened, and how she had been pushed to her breaking point.

"I-I just felt so alone, so criticized. Like every single eye was on me and all these opinions were being formed over something people didn't understand. He said those things, and I just got scared, Adam.. It's like I was reliving it over and over again."

"You ran away." Adam said, folding his hands together in his lap. "Shay, I've known you for well over ten years, and I know you, and you know me. And you should know that I know you're better than that."

"Better than what?" Her eyebrow rose and he shrugged. "Adam, all those memories I was trying to suppress just came shooting back, and it's like I can't get rid of any of them. How can they still be haunting me, Adam? How many bridges do I have to burn before I finally get rid of them?" Tears stung her eyes, and she shook her head in attempts to chase them away. Adam put an arm around her.

"Better than running away from your problems. Shay, you always want to run, and you'll never move on unless you start ru—"

"Running in the other direction," Shay finished. "I know, Randy said the same thing." She put a finger to her temple and Adam rolled his eyes, a slight smile crossing his features.

"Stole my lines," Adam laughed, his expression becoming more serious. "I love you, Shay. You know damn well that I do, but don't be a coward, Shay. Don't. You just have to know that it'll get better."

Shay sighed and stood, going back over to the mantle. Her fingers danced across a picture frame, and she immediately retracted her hand. Cleaning, or fiddling with things was one of her nervous habits, when she wanted nothing more than to crouch under a rock and hide. However, as her luck would have it, someone always came searching for her. "You know, I would've expected Stephen."

"Randy said that Stephen was a day away from packing his bags," Adam laughed again, "but, Randy talked him out of it. Stephen's a good guy, though. He's upset."

"What, that I decided to have some R&R? Come on, Adam."

"It's not that, it's that you ran away from the problem instead of facing it head on. When all that shit went down with Matt, I marched right back into work the next day and took the consequence." Shay was surprised at how level he was keeping his tone, and she turned to face him. Resting her back against the stony wall of her fireplace, she dragged her hand through her hair.

"If I would've stayed, I would've proven them right; that I'm some weak, pathetic little toy for people to play with."

"Y'know, coming back would prove that you're strong enough to put it all behind you."

"I wouldn't be able to deal with the stares, the attention... it'd be terrible, Adam."

"Not any worse than never coming back. Stephen doesn't want you to just go away, Shay. He seems to enjoy your company. And I'm not telling you to go at this alone, that'd be terrible," Adam stood and went over to Shay, putting his hands on her shoulders. "Stephen's there for you, Phil's there, Randy, Jay, I'm only a phone call away; there are so many people here for you, compared to the people against you. You want to prove to Nick that you're over him? That you're strong, and able, and completely accepting of the past? Go and catch a plane. Staying here would be cowardice, and I know you're better than that."

Shay nodded, "I told Stephen I'd be here. And he told everyone else." She shrugged. "I'm just... afraid, Adam, that people will...I don't know. Nobody knew before, and now it just feels like I've been exploited." She twirled her hands together. "Not all of them needed to know, Adam."

"You'll get through it, Shay. You're strong, and you'll be okay. You always, somehow, make it through." Adam smiled. "I, uh, gotta go. Please, call, and make sure this little mini-vacation is exactly that—a couple days off. Promise?"

"I promise," she said softly, opening the door for him as he left. Shutting the door, she returned to the couch. She began to ponder if she ever should return. "You're being ridiculous, Shay. Of course you'll go back." Shay rolled her eyes, strumming her fingers against her thigh.

/

She remembered the days long ago, early in 2010. It was a winter day at the park when John first looked directly into her eyes and told her he loved her. It hardly felt like over two years, it almost felt like it could've happened a few months prior. Instinctively, her fingers brushed against the scar on her jaw. All the pain and worry and fear she had felt for the past few years were bottled up beneath scar and skin. The blissful months she had spent with John were still in her mind, even if some of the details were fuzzy. John's jealousy, the rise and the fall...it was a major part of her life. Michelle's antics and the cruelty of the people around her. It was a stark contrast to the way things were now, where mostly everyone was indifferent to her being there.

Even now, though, after everything that had happened, she couldn't bring herself to regret getting into that car with John. Through the nightmares, and the restless nights, and the fights with Jay and Chris; she still couldn't regret that one spring day. Summer 2010 was spent in physical therapy. Winter was spent patching things up with her father, whom she had to reconnect with, mostly due to Adam's ushering. The better part of 2011 had her in Canada, resting and trying to replenish herself enough to return to the WWE. Another fall, a trip down the stairs while she was attempting laundry, put her back into crutches for a while. It was then she realized that her troubles were far from over; the first time she realized that she had a sleeping problem. It was also the year she had spent mostly alone, with all of her friends doing their own thing. She had lost touch with Mike, Ron, and most of the loose friends she had made while with John.

Then, one day in August, Jay dropped by to tell her that they were going out. She rejected at first, but eventually came around after Jay cast one of his infamous pouts towards her. The longer the night went on, the more she was convinced it was a bad idea. Sure enough, when she ended up running into Stephen, she was thoroughly convinced. And. so began their somewhat bitter relationship. Stephen and her butted heads, nearly on everything, mostly on issues concerning her. For a few months, he seemed annoyed by her, calling her out on things John let her get away with, on things most let her get away with. But not him, no, not him. Something about him lit something within her. She felt more like herself now, curled in and upset, than she did two years ago, when she was blindly making accusations.

_"Maybe yeh should try livin' without them, find new ways to keep yer pretty lil' head. We're not all monsters."_ She believed him now, and she believed that he wasn't one of those monsters, regardless of the image he seemed to put off towards people. He seemed to have a habit of catching her when she fell, and for some bizarre reason, chose to let her inside. The thing he had told her, she could tell hadn't been told to many people. He trusted her, after the snappy and rude remarks, after keeping him out for so long, he found it in him to trust her. Somewhere along the way, she began to put her trust in him too. He had helped her, in more ways than she could explain, in more ways than she told him.

"I-I should thank him," she murmured, smiling slightly as she noted the warmth of his embrace. The memory of the night Stephen sat up with her, solely because she couldn't sleep after she had passed out at the Royal Rumble, how he refused to get some rest until she did. The days that led up to this point in time seemed miniscule to her now. Days passed, quickly, she noticed. Yet she still spent half her time dwelling in the past and the other half running away from it. And that was a mistake, she realized. Retreating here, to the safe confines of her own home, was running away. Especially after Nick's tirade. Sure, she needed time alone, but she had so much time alone a year ago; this wasn't about to go away on its own. Sooner or later, she'd have to face it head-on.

Shay cleared her throat as she reached for her phone and dialed a number. It rang for a few times before a voice answered.

"Hey, this is Stephen, but I'm not in righ' now. So, leave a message an' I'll get back to yeh as soon as I can." A tone followed and she pushed a smile to her face, brushing her hair from her eyes.

"Hey, uh, Stephen. It's Shay, call me when you get this. I'll be needing a ride from the airport, and, um, you-you're the first person I thought of to help me, and...yeah. Please? And Stephen...," she trailed off, about to add a 'thank you for everything', but decided it'd be better said in person. "Drive safe, alright? H-Have a good day, Stephen." She slipped the phone into her pocket as she got up. Moving around the couch, Jericho skittered up, pawing at her leg. "Yeah, little man, I have to go again. I'll be back soon, I promise." Shay bent down and scratched between his ears. Smiling, she straightened up and moved towards the stairs. She had a bag to pack, and a life to live.


	23. A Secret Given and A Secret Kept

**So here's Kiwi, and she brings you a new chapter of MTAF! Whoo-hoo! I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors. Um, recent news: I got a job today! Wooohooo, right? I get to spend my summer slaving away and doing dishes. I love you all, and thank you to those who have reviewed, story alerted/favorited, etc. XD Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Stephen stood with his back against a column, whistling a tune to himself as he waited for the multi-generation Diva to come through the gate. It had been an interesting few days without her there, and he was trying to figure out just how to tell her how people were reacting. Glancing down at his watch, he muttered something about how the plane should be arriving soon.<p>

He had been worried, but he still let her go. It would've been foolish to try and convince her to stay. Besides, she had left with nothing more than a voice mail assuring him that she had landed safely and gotten home safely. On the other hand, she had left him with a bickering, frantic, and furious Jay. Stephen made a mental note to _not _tell Shay about the fight Jay had almost gotten into. Yeah, he had decided that that wouldn't have been the wisest choice.

He started to wonder why he was there. She could've called anybody. She could've called Jay, or Chris, or Randy... but she called _him_. And, ten months ago, he wouldn't have bothered. Had this been then, he wouldn't have come. But, it was now, and she had left him another voice mail, one which he cursed himself for not getting on time. Regardless, he hadn't hesitated in calling her back and setting up a time.

It didn't feel like ten months. Sure, they had known each other briefly before, but not like this. Before, they had kept their distance. Partially, he believed, was due to his downright fear of talking to her, especially when she was around John... which was pretty much always. It didn't help that John seemed to glare at him whenever he briefly mentioned Shay, or came near her. From what he noticed, the brunette didn't act that way around everybody, but he gave up deciphering the reason why a long time ago. But, it was pretty ironic, considering that John lost Shay, and she wound up spending more time with him. Regardless of whether or not that actually counted as a 'victory' over John, he didn't really care. It was merely a brownie point.

He didn't really get along well with John. Sure, they shared a room now and then, and most of the time they were stuck in the same locker room together, so they got to know each other. From the John he knew, he never would've expected him to cheat on Shay. Nick explained it, but he could only rely on Nick's information so much. He would have to find the right time to ask her what really happened; and, if she did tell him, he hoped it would somehow get her to sleep better. She still woke in fits on some nights, and she would always be awake when he went to bed, and awake when he got up. Did she know how worrying she was? Now he understood where Jay had been coming from. All that aside, he just wanted her to be well again; to not cringe when Nick brushed past her in the hall, or fabricate a story to try and ease his mind on why she was up so late. It had been a while since she was in the ring, and Vince would only give her so much leeway.

Stephen glanced at the board. Her flight was on time, and should be landing any minute now. He cleared his throat, straightened his posture and put his hands in his pockets. About ten minutes later, he could see her blond hair squirming through the crowd. Raising a hand in a slight wave, she nodded and continued on her way. Reaching him, she smiled and looked down at her feet.

"Th-thank you, Stephen. For coming to get me. I know you're busy, and I really appreciate it." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

"No problem, yeh called, an' I answered." He shrugged and gestured over to get her luggage. Slinging the duffel over his shoulder, the pulled the other one along.

"I can get my bags."

"Let me be a gentleman, alrigh'?" He smiled, nodding after she did before leading her outside. Her hand went to shield her face from the sun. Stopping at his car, he popped the trunk and set the bags inside. Shutting it, he leaned against the trunk. "So, what did yeh get into while ye were in Canada?"

"Catching up with my father, nothing else, really."

"Uh-huh." He nodded, not really believing her. The girl had to have some hobbies, didn't she. Stephen opened her door, shutting it after she sat down, and returned to the driver's seat. Soon later, they were back on the road, and he was studying her out of the corner of his eye. "What do yeh like to do fer fun?"

"I, um, I like to play piano. And I write sometimes, read, uh...I never did get out much as a child. I was afraid of getting hurt, so I did a lot of inside things. I-I like to sing," Shay shrugged, and he smirked.

"Sing? Any chance yeh'd sing for me now?" Stephen reached for the radio, and she laughed.

"No, God...no. You were in a choir, why don't you sing for me?" Shay retaliated, and he shook his head, replying that he saw her point. "You're wondering about John."

He was surprised at how quickly she picked up on it. Stephen licked his lips and cleared his throat, and the way she tilted her head away from him only made his thoughts that much more obvious. He was about to say something when she held up her hand.

"It's alright. He just cheated on me, because he didn't trust me. He jumped to a conclusion, and it's fine now. I-I'm fine." Shay shrugged, "That's all there is to it."

"If yer so fine, why can't yeh sleep at night?"

"If I knew, I'd tell you," she said, trying to stop the shakiness. Stephen sighed, and briefly looked at her.

"Tell me abou' the accident."

"No."

"C'mon, Shay. It'll be alrigh'. Yeh know I won' judge yeh." He pleaded, looking at her again, wishing she'd look back. She kept her eyes trained out her window, hoping that the tears she was shedding were silent, and that they'd disappear soon.

"How about you keep your eyes on the road?" They were on an interstate, going to their next city, and it was a pretty barren stretch of road. "Please, Stephen, can we just drop this?"

"I'm tired of yeh being so sick, Shay."

"Don't you think I am too? I'm trying, Stephen, I just don't know where to start, or what to do." Her eyes started to sting, and she brushed her tears away. Absentmindedly, she touched the scar on her jaw, and her mind flashed back to the rainy, cold night that completely changed her life. "Please, Stephen." The car drifted slightly, and the road seemed to disappear from under them. Stephen looked up, and cursed. Cranking the wheel hard, he barely heard her slight scream as he avoided running off the road and into a lake. Her hands flew up, arms crossing over her face as if to block something. The car pulled a sharp U-turn, and skidded to the opposite side of the road.

As soon as the car stopped, he looked back at her, eyes wide and mouth poised to ask if she was okay. She looked back at him, tears misting her eyes as she opened the door, got out, and slammed it shut. He heard her slump to the ground, and he left the vehicle and went around. Squatting down beside her, he stayed silent for a few moments. "Shay?"

"C-Can we just... stop, Stephen? Please? Can we just get back on the road? Can we just not talk?" She was crying, shoulders shaking with her hands fiddling with the hem of her shirt. Wiping at her eyes, she coughed and folded her arms over her stomach.

Stephen cleared his throat and nodded. "I'm sorry, Shay."

She put a hand on his knee. "It was partially my fault." Shay murmured, and he stood, holding his hand out to her. She took it, and he brought her to her feet. "Th-Thank you."

"Yer welcome."

"No, not just for helping me up, for just...," she held her breath, noting his confusion. Reaching out, she hugged him. He pulled her closer, hesitating before putting his arms around her. "Thank you for everything you've been doing lately."

"Shay, I almost got yeh into a car accident." She either ignored him, or didn't know what to say because she simply shrugged.

"Other than that, though, you've been pretty good to me. So, thank you."

He smiled, taking in a breath. "Yeh never have to thank me, Shay."

/

"You know, the last time anyone found out about Nick, he got a black eye." She stated, and he smiled.

"Yer lucky I talked Jay outta hittin' him."

"That's nice. But how do I know you didn't go after him after I told you?"

"Because I woulda done a lot worse than jus' hittin' the fella, an' he woulda had a lot more to worry about than just a black eye." He laughed, smiling at the worried gaze. "I'm kiddin', Shay." She nodded, believing that there was some truth behind his statement. She cleared her throat as they entered the arena. Instantly, she felt a few people turn and look at her. As they went through the halls, she noticed it more and more.

"Everyone's staring at me, Stephen," Shay muttered, stopping herself from reaching out to link arms with the redhead beside her.

Stephen sighed, glancing down at the blond who was leaning more towards him than she usually did. "O' course they are, Shay. They... they learned somethin' about yeh tha' they didn' know before."

"Yes, but what's with the staring? I-I'm the same Shay I was before. It's not like I ch-changed." Her hand went to rub her neck and he nearly winced at her discomfort.

"I'd prepare yerself, lass. A few o' them are upset. This is jus' the beginning," he warned, nearly regretting it as she spun around, eyes ablaze.

"What? U-Upset?" Worry had set in and he nodded, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Who?" They continued walking, and she began to wring her hands together. He simply shrugged, avoiding her gaze as he led her around a corner and into the backstage area. She was about to ask him again when someone ran up to her and tapped her shoulder. Turning around, she was enveloped in a hug. Hesitantly, she returned the embrace. "A-AJ."

"I-I am so sorry, Shay. I just... I heard what Nick said in catering, and I felt so bad, and Bryan started asking questions, so I told him what you told me and he's mad, and he's coming, and I am so sorry, Shay. I know you told me not to tell anyone, but—" AJ said, barely stopping for a breath. The brunette glanced over her shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"AJ, hold your horses," Shay was about to continue when a mass of voices cut her off.

"You should've told me."

"Is it true?"

"Why _didn't_ you tell me?"

"I'm sorry."

Shay had snapped her eyes shut, biting her lip as she tried to organize who said what. Taking in a breath, she reopened her eyes to see Phil, Cena, Bryan, and AJ standing in front of her. "C-Can we not do this right now?"

"Uh, you've been evading us for about a week now, so no." Bryan stated, crossing his arms over his chest. He glanced around before settling it on Shay. His gaze softened, and he ran a hand through his hair. "I just wish you would've told me about Nick. I wouldn't have... I would've talked to Vince about it, you wouldn't have had to sit through that."

"Bryan, have you ever tried saying no to Vince? Exacly. It's fine, Bryan. I-I made it through it just fine." Shay replied, resisting the urge to turn and run back down the hall and away from the curious glances burrowing their way into her skin. She couldn't though, she had to stand her ground, and face this. "Besides, the storyline was great. I-It gave me you guys, so it's alright." She smiled slightly, gesturing to the group. Bryan slowly nodded.

"It just... it's sickening, Shay."

Shay bit her lip, unsure of how to respond. Clearing her throat, she ran a hand through her hair. "I couldn't tell you guys. It hurts the same if nobody knows, and I was afraid of what people would say, and do. Besides, when it was happening, I barely knew any of you."

"Shay, is it alright if I talk to you alone for a moment?" Cena asked and Shay, slightly confused, nodded and followed him around the corner and down the hall. He seemed fidgety, and she sighed. "I wanted to say I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Her eyebrow arced, "why? It's not like you did anything."

"I," he looked around, cursed under his breath, and ran a hand over his head, "I saw Dave with you once. He seemed so angry, and you looked so scared. It wasn't just once, either. I saw the way you flinched under his gaze, his grip always seemed a little too hard, and they way he tried to hide you away...it wasn't right. I think I knew, and I don't know why I never said anything. It wasn't my business, I guess. I was never afraid of Dave."

"But I was."

John sighed, resting his back against the wall as he put his hands into his pockets. "I thought you'd figure out how to get away. It's like, everyone was so used to him and his...tendencies. Did he ever threaten to take your job away."

Shay snorted, "He threatened to take a lot more away than just my job." Shay shook her head and swallowed, "There's nothing you could've done."

"We could've stopped it."

"A lot of people could've stopped it, John. I barely knew you, you barely acknowledged my existence. Hell, for the most part, you guys only knew me as "Dave's Girlfriend". He didn't want me talking to you guys." Shay stated, standing next to him. "It's fine, really. Am I a little upset that no one did anything? Yeah, who wouldn't? Am I over the fact that it took me a year and a half to get away? Yeah. It was a long time ago, Cena. What's done is done."

"How did you get away?"

"He put me in the hospital once; really badly, and Adam and Jay had had enough. So they went to him, _persuaded_ him to leave me the hell alone, and told me I was done with him. At that point, they wouldn't let me argue," Shay shrugged. "Fast forward a few years, and here I still am." John nodded, brushing off his jeans as he stood straight. He walked with her back to the group, and she went back beside Stephen.

/

Later that day, Shay sat in the hotel room on one bed, while Stephen occupied the other. Standing, she made her way over to her suitcase and brought out a black garment bag. Hanging it on the back of the bathroom door, she smoothed out the creases. "What's that?" Stephen asked, looking up from his book.

"The dress I'm wearing for the wedding. It's in two weeks, you know."

"I'm aware."

"You sound upset." She walked over and pulled out the desk chair, swiveling it to face him before sitting down. "Why?"

He sighed, closing the book and tossing it aside. "He doesn't deserve to have yeh at his wedding."

"Maybe it was Mel that invited me. She and I were friends."

"Were, yeh haven't spoken in how long?" When she paused, he went on. "Of course. It's the exact same thing Miranda did to me. He still wants yeh, doesn't he? And he's mad he doesn't still have yeh, so he's invitin' yeh to his weddin' to show off what coulda been yeh." Shay sighed, pressing a finger to her temple as she looked around. A part of her believed that he was right. Why else would he invite her? In hopes that she'd object in a mad fit of forgiveness and fall right back into his arms? She was over him, that she was certain of, and besides, the man across from her was having more of an impact on her life than she realized. Her attention was broken by the snapping of fingers. "See somethin' yeh like?" The original playful smirk was plastered on his lips and she fought the urge to roll her eyes. She bit her cheek to stop the small "yes" that was forming on her tongue from coming out. Her eyes studied him for a second before she stood up and returned the chair to its place.

Smiling, she walked towards the bathroom. Shay turned, facing him. Before she ducked into the bathroom, she grinned.

"I might."


	24. Wedding Bells and Exes from Hell

**Okay, so it's a long chapter. A lot of stuff happens, lol, and I hope you enjoy it. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/Grammatical errors. Oh, and Angel wrote me this fabulous oneshot, which you should read if you haven't. It's entitled "When It's Time", so go pay a visit to that. :D Thank you all for reviewing, much love, and I hope you read, review, and enjoy this chapter.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Shay bit her lip, studying her reflection in the mirror as Stephen came out of the bathroom. His eyebrow rose at her while she pulled a section of her hair back. Shaking her head, she let it drop. She put a hand against the mirror on the wall. Her arm shook slightly, and Shay drew in a breath, coughing.<p>

Cautiously, he put a hand on the small of her back and her body straightened up, tension stringing her shoulders together. "Would it be a given to say I'm not as okay as I claimed I was?"

"Yeah." He responded, shrugging as she turned around. "Perfectly normal, though. Are yeh gonna bail?"

"Depends. What does bailing look like?"

"Depends."

"You are so helpful," she murmured, picking up the garment bag from its spot on the door. "H-Hurry up, Stephen. The wedding starts at noon, and we have to get going." Stephen rolled his eyes, noting that it was hardly five in the morning. Shay rambled on, heading towards the door. He followed her into the hallway and put an arm out to prevent her from moving forward.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"No."

Stephen looked down, contemplating whether or not he should say something. He shook his head. She would tell him in due time, just like she had promised with everything else. He would just have to be patient. Stephen remembered how half the people he talked to compared her to porcelain, and looking at her now; looking at him with peculiar eyes, standing with her arms crossed and an soft expression on her face, he could see how they'd get the idea.

But he didn't believe it, not for a second. Porcelain would've shattered by now, and despite what she thought, he had his own opinion.

"What?" Her eyebrow arched; they hadn't spoken for a while. She bit her lip, like she knew he was studying her. He shrugged, and a few more moments of silence passed. Snapping out of it, he dropped his arm.

"Come on, we have a plane to catch." Taking the garment bag out of her hand, he tossed it over his shoulder with his own.

"I wish you would stop doing that."

"Being a gentleman? Darling, I could be an ass if you wanted me to." Stephen smirked and she sighed, biting her lip. "Don't worry, your dress will be fine. By the way, which one is it? Is it the teal one, or the red one?"

"God, Stephen. I'm going to a wedding, there's no way in hell I'm wearing either of those." They moved through the hotel and to his rental.

"That's a shame." She smacked his arm, and he laughed. "From a man's perspective, I wouldn't mind seeing you in them again." He drove out of the parking lot and got on to the highway. "Whatever dress you picked, I'm sure John'll regret ever havin' betrayed yeh. Shay. Today's your day to give him hell, let him know what he's missing."

Shay laughed, shaking her head, "What, should I just go around dancing and having a good time, and ignore the fact that my ex is less than 100 feet away with his new bride?"

"Exactly. Kiss a few of them, if yeh want." His eyes shimmered at her expression, and the words that seemed to fly out of her mouth.

"Is that what you did at Mirand—"

"No," he cut her off, apologizing shortly after before he shook his head. "That's the difference. You'll have people there, I had no one. I left early, I told them that I had someone waiting for me, and I couldn't let her down. And I come back into town, and you're the one...," he paused, searching for a word, "comforting _me_. You were the one not letting me down. You never told me what happened in California." Stephen stated, straying the topic away from himself.

"We talked," she said slowly, and at his raised eyebrow, she rolled her eyes, "alright, fine. He told me a few things, started hiding his wedding things as if they actually bothered me. He told me he loved Melina, and that he still loved me. We argued a little, which was new. We never fought, never really disagreed on much, and I think that we would've fallen apart anyway, because a relationship built on that never lasts. The conversation made me realize things." Shay tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. The sun was just beginning to rise, and his hair seemed to capture it. She cleared her throat, focusing her attention out the window, finalizing that the conversation was over. They reached the airport, and soon were seated on the plane. Twenty minutes later, tears were welled up in the corner of her eyes, and she was trying to catch her breath. Easing herself back into her chair, she wiped at her eyes and tried to control her shaking shoulders. She glanced at Stephen, noting his grin.

"Yeh have a nice laugh, Shay."

/

Shay winced as she nearly fell. Her foot caught on something, and she had started to fall to the side when an arm looped around her waist and pulled her in. "Can yeh start being more careful, please?" She noticed the slight concern. "This is probably the fifth time yeh've fallen today."

A faint scarlet flushed her cheeks. "I-It's the heels. I swear I'm not doing this on purpose." She muttered, looking up at him. He flashed a crooked smile, and a small smile crossed her face. His mouth opened, and he was about to say something when a sharp whistle caught their attention.

"Hey, Dork Face, Golden Graham! Come on!" Each raised an eyebrow as they turned towards the source of the voice. Adam grinned, elbowing Jay before gesturing to them, and boasting about how he had gotten their attention faster. Shay rolled her eyes, stepping away from Stephen.

"So, which one of us is Dork Face?" Stephen asked, and Shay shook her head with a slight laugh as the two joined.

"Shay!" Adam pulled her into a hug, spinning her around. "You look great."

"Thanks," she smiled, returning the embrace. "It's good to see you too, now c-come on, we should be getting in now." For the first time, she actually looked at the venue and her eyes widened. It was extravagant, a large home built on a piece of shoreline, far enough for the tide, yet close enough to get the sweet, sea salt smell. She followed the three alone a cobblestone path that wound its way through a luxurious garden. Blooms of several different shades blotted the green and she tried to stifle a sneeze.

"What if we get to Wonderland through here?" Jay mused, inspecting a vine. "Hell, we have Alice. Stephen can be the White Rabbit, and we're—"

"Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum," Shay answered, cocking her head the side and smirking at the two blondes, who rolled their eyes in unison and muttered a 'whatever'. She could her Stephen cover his laugh before he put a hand on her shoulder. "Y-Yes?"

"Hold on a second. Do you have a hair pin?"

"Yes... in my hair." She pointed to her head before plucking one out and handing it to him. "What do you need a hair—"

He cut her off with a finger against her lips. "Shhh, Shay. Just...hold your horses, alright?" Stephen smiled, turning his back to her and walking over to a plant. Whistling, he started fiddling with one of them. She was about to ask, but thought better of it and sat on the stone bench nearby. Adam and Jay had already dispersed, and she took to watching the other plants sway slightly in the breeze, or stay put. "Alrigh', yeh ready, Shay?"

She chuckled, "Ready for what?"

"Jus' close your eyes." She did, and she felt someone sit beside her. "An' tilt your head towards me." A moment later, she could feel his fingers brushing against her neck and jaw, and the soft puff of his breath against her skin. Her fingers clenched around the hem of her dress, and a hand rested on her back. "Jus' one more thing," He rustled for something in his pocket and took out his phone. "Look up at me and smile." Again, she did as she was told and she registered the shutter sound.

"A picture? R-Really?" Her eyebrow arched, and she crossed her arms over her chest. "Can I...?" He nodded, already having his phone towards her. She smiled, and her hand went up to gingerly brush the petals of the while lily now nestled in her hair. "Th-thank you, Stephen." She stood and smoothed out her dress. "I-uh...let's, um get going, eh?"

"Canadian," he coughed, winking at her as their steps fell into sync. Both her eyebrows rose, and she shook her head with a sigh. He stopped when he found a sign. "Union o' John Hennigan an' Melina Perez, June 20th, 2012."

"_Irish_," she coughed, shielding her eyes from the sun as she looked back at him. She smiled sweetly and he chuckled. "Stephen, we should probably find a seat." Shay looked over at the seating, and her eyes widened a gain. "Th-that's a lot of people, Stephen." He nodded and gave her a reassuring smile.

"I still can drive yeh somewhere else, if you'd rather." He shrugged, "But, I'm kinda hoping yeh won't, 'cause most people get really _awesome_ at weddings, an' I wouldn't want to miss that." He nudged her with his shoulder as they reached their seats. "Just think about it. There'll be people here yeh absolutely love, and yeh can have fun with them." She nodded, and they talked for a while more until silence fell on the crowd. Then, the slight sound of footsteps, and the subtle sound of a mother's tears. She glanced over, noting John and his mother, a woman she had never actually met. They walked until the altar, where John broke off, gave his mother a kiss on the cheek, and stood in front of a priest. Stephen leaned in next to her, close to her ear. "Does it feel like yeh should be up there?"

She shook her head, dipping down to be closer to him. "It feels like I should be right here."

"Did I ever tell yeh that at Miranda's weddin', while I was standing by the fella, she kept giving me this weird look?" Shay shook her head again. "Well, I wouldn't look now, but John's givin' yeh the same one." Shay nodded, having felt his stare on her for a moment. A slow tune started to waft throughout the air, and time seemed to slow to a dramatic halt as the bridal party floated in.

/

So, perhaps the wedding ceremony wasn't entirely terrible, and the food had been good. She saw one of her old friends get married, and she was as happy as a clam at the moment. Shay drummed her fingers against the tabletop, noticing who she was seated with. Stephen, thankfully, flanked her right, with AJ, Nattie, and TJ around her.

"They probably thought you'd be miserable."

"I find it pretty funny, actually." Shay chuckled. "They put me halfway across the room from the two people they know I'm good with, and stick me with people they think I'm bad with." She pivoted in her seat to see the happy couple greeting people by table. "Oh look, we'll be last."

And sure enough, some time later, they were presented with John and Melina, both of which were grinning as they received congratulations and hugs from AJ, TJ, and Nattie. Then, their eyes fell on Shay and Stephen.

"Stephen," John smiled, albeit hesitantly and his tone had changed. Shay forced herself not to ask the question that was forming, and instead turned her attention to Melina, rather than keep it on the tension between John and Stephen.

"Melina, you're beautiful," she smiled, hugging the petite brunette with a smile. Shay almost pulled away, but Melina kept her close.

"No hard feelings right?"

"None." She pulled back, feeling John's gaze on her. "Congratulations, it was a very nice ceremony."

"Thanks, Shay. You're looking good, considering." John smiled, and out of the corner of her eye, she could see Stephen tense even more. Stepping closer to him, she rested a hand on his shoulder. John's eyes dropped to the floor as Melina kissed his cheek and wandered off to greet a new arrival. As she left, his eyes traveled over her; most notably her legs. "I hope you're doing well, Shay."

She hated the way her name sounded on his lips, or the way he drew it out. Somewhere, across the room, a glass shattered and she flinched involuntarily. An arm wrapped around her waist, and she was glad, knowing that without it, she would've fallen to the floor. "I'm fine, thanks."

"Hey, man, Mel might get lonely if yeh keep her waiting." Stephen cut in, gesturing with his head to the brunette at the head table. John nodded, waving as he departed. The redhead instantly turned to face her, keeping his arm around her, and her close to him. "Yeh alright?"

"Yeah," she said shakily, "I'm fine."

"He shouldn't have mentioned that," he whispered as they sat down. "It was a real asshole thing to do." Stephen muttered, shaking his head in disapproval.

"Some people are assholes, Stephen," her voice was soft, barely discernible as she plastered a smile on to her face.

/

The last person she expected to run into was Phil. He smiled at her and held his arms out. "You came."

"Y-Yeah, I did," she replied, tapping her hand against her thigh. "I'm not exactly sure why, but I did. S-Stephen, he, uh, thinks this is a great time to totally prove John wrong. I'm not sure what he means by that." She shrugged, tucking her hands behind her back. Phil nodded, and glanced over the shoulder at the dance floor.

"Shay?" He asked, his lips twitching into a smirk. "May I have this dance?"

"What?" Her voice shuddred in alarm, "Um, I... I can't dance." Phil shrugged, and offered her a hand.

"Neither can I." He grabbed her hand and led her out to the floor. Shay's face flushed scarlet. "You wanna know how to survive a wedding? Whenever a slow song comes on, you grab a friend and you do the Running Man." Phil smiled, "Then, maybe the Cabbage Patch and the Robocop."

"Punk, if you do the Robocop, I will dance with you. An honest to God dance."

"How about an honest to God dance, and then the Robocop? Eh?" She thought for a moment, before nodding and going with him. He put a hand on her waist and took her hand in the other. A few moments later, he smiled. "I'm glad you came, Shay."

"Me too," she laughed as he tilted them forward. "We probably look like the Little Teapot with... four left feet."

"I never told you I was a Little Teapot!" His eyes widened and he grimaced. "My bad." He paused for a moment. "I hope Stephen doesn't think I'm any competition."

"What?"

"Oh, uh... I just thought," Phil shook his head, "Never mind." The song changed and he let her go. Then, cupping his hands around his mouth, he yelled. "Hey, Cena! You, me and Ron!" Shay grinned, half covering her face as Cena and Ron approached the Straightedge Superstar.

Needless to say, she got the whole thing on camera. Later, she sauntered up to Stephen, swaying her hips slightly. He was laughing, watching as Phil and his crew started doing the Running Man. "We work with a bunch of..."

"Dorks?" She finished, smiling. "C'mon, Stephen, why so blue?"

With a sigh, he ran a hand through his hair. "John's been keeping an eye on yeh, an' I don't really like it." She nodded slowly as AJ skipped up to her, looping an arm through hers.

"Sorry, Stephen. Shay and I have some serious business to attend to." Stephen smiled, nodding in understanding as AJ tugged Shay towards the dance floor.

"Dance with me later, okay?" Shay called out to him, grinning as he said yes.

Maybe this wouldn't turn out bad after all.

/

Bryan stood next to Stephen, laughing. "Is that Shay and AJ doing the Soulja Boy?"

Stephen smirked. "Yeah. Yeh shoulda seen them earlier. Never have I ever seen such an interestin' rendition of a shuffle." He shook his head, grinning as his eyes fell on Shay. The sunlight caught on her hair, and it fell in golden waves over her shoulders. Her laughter caught on the air, as she moved her hips to the beat. He made it a mission to dance with her one day, if not today. She smiled, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear as she noticed his gaze. Waving him over, she mouthed a slight "please".

He stood and shrugged off his suit coat. Slinging it over the back of the chair, he rubbed his chin. She still danced, holding hands with AJ. She was having fun, in a situation she swore would've been hell. She was making the most of it, capturing a slight essence of innocence. Seeing her now, he could see Spring written all over her. Sunshine, blooming flowers, rebirthing.

Yeah, she was Spring.

And he realized something as she took his hand and dragged him to the dance floor; he wouldn't mind marrying a girl like her.

/

Barely twenty minutes later, and John called him to the side. "Hey, I, uh... noticed Shay."

"Yeh've been watchin' her since she came in here," Stephen shook his head, already missing his spot next to her. "I really wouldn't be worried. She's pretty normal."

"What the hell have you done to her!" He gestured toward Shay, who was dancing with several of her coworkers. "She's...she's..."

Stephen snorted, "Survivin' without yeh." He knew that deep, deep down, she was still frightened and scared over what happened with Nick, and partially John. She was just enjoying herself, bopping her head and from what he could see, had smiled more in that day than she had for most of the week. "She's been doing it for a while. Jus' being a lil' spontaneous tonight." He smiled, putting his hands in his pockets. "Now, if yeh don' mind, I have ta go and break her heart." He fought back the laughter at John's confusion. "We have to go, it'll be a shame. Congratulations, John." He waved slightly and returned to Shay.

She pouted, and gave a weak glare before following him to the car, her heels in hand. "I-It's been great."

"Yeah," he smiled, opening her door. "Yeh have some pretty wicked moves there, Shay. An' I thought you said yeh couldn't dance?"

"I-I can't, I just... alright, the whole Soulja Boy thing was because I was home on injury and h-had nothing better to do. O-Otherwise, I just... didn't care what people thought of me."

"Phil's getting to yeh, so, after the airport we're going to my place, right?"

"Yeah, then out to the next city," Shay confirmed, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "Thanks for the dance."

"Any time."

/

It bewildered him, really, how they could go from smiling and laughing to a bitter argument in barely any time. It had been a while though, since they really got at each other's throats. She had her arms crossed over her chest, standing barely ten feet away from him, and she was soaking wet. They had gotten back to Florida, and it was breaching nine o'clock. Dark clouds loomed overhead, casting their rain down. It fell in rivulets down her face, and he was pretty sure some of them might've been tears. He remembered now, what she had said to him.

"What were you and John talking about?" She was dressed in her street clothes, having changed back at the airport.

"You. He just... he wasn't actin' right." He shrugged, hoping she'd get off the topic. She'd somehow cornered him, caught him between staying out here and talking it through, or her walking back to the nearest airport, the Jackonville Airport. He had rolled his eyes, until she forced him to look at her.

"He can be an ass, Stephen."

"You used to say the same abou' me!" He didn't mean to yell, and he ran his hand through his wet hair, trying to focus his attention anywhere but her. However, she had his attention in the palm of her petite hand, and she could do with it as she pleased. Her clothes clung to her, his to him, and off in the distance a crack of thunder caused her to flinch. "Yeh used to flinch every time I touched you, every time I spoke to yeh...," He trailed off, shaking his head.

"Because I was scared alright! Because you were an ass, and I have no idea wh-what happened to change that." The words rapid fired off her lips.

"That's what yeh used to think? Huh? That I was an ass? Alrigh', maybe I was an ass, an' yeh know exactly why I was. At least I admit to it, yeh jus' hide behind words and your friends. Yeh jus' hole yourself up an' build up a freakin' wall so no one can get in!"

"Because every single time someone gets in they end up hurting me, Stephen. Every time someone gets close enough, they just sink their fangs into me and poison me. That's it. And I'm afraid it'll happen again, Stephen. I'm afraid to let people in, to really let them in." She voice was rising, and he stepped forward more.

"Yeh can't be afraid, Shay. The moment yeh let fear rule your life, is the moment where yeh jus' stop livin'. Yeh can't be afraid all the time, Shay. Yeh just can't!" He had tried to keep his voice down, really. He knew exactly how much she hated yelling, but right now, she was returning it full force.

"You know what, you can still be an ass. You act like you're not afraid of a fuckin' thing, and trust me it's just as big of a l-lie as me saying I'm alright. You don't know what it's like being afraid to sleep at night, have no idea what it's like to be so goddamn afraid to fall in love that you end up pushing everyone away." He could her her voice shaking, and he was pretty sure it was anger. Pure, raw, anger. The situation was spiraling, and he briefly remembered the dance they shared earlier, the moments. He did care about her, far too deeply to be deterred easily. And he was just as afraid as she was.

"Yeah, well, at least I'm not as fucked up as you," He froze, cursing himself as he tore his hands through his hair. "Shay... Shay," he called after her as she stalked towards the house. Following her, he put a hand on her shoulder. Whipping around, he felt the sting of her slap against his face. He growled, and she flinched, shocked at her action. Moments later, his hands were on her hips, and he had claimed her lips with his. Her eyes widened for a moment before she returned, her hands gripping the collar of his shirt and pulling him closer to her. She could feel the heat of his body against her cold self. Running a hand along his neck, she traced a vein to his collarbone with her lips.

He wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her to him and reaching into his pocket. He brought out a pair of keys, keeping his lips on hers the entire time. Anger. That's what this had to be. Stephen tried to think, but she was making that difficult. He backed her into the house, slamming the door shut behind them and locking it. The keys dropped to the floor. His hands entangled in her hair, he inhaled her scent and deepened the kiss. She was the only thing he could think about right now. The way her hair was plastered to her face, how her eyes were flashing warning signs, how her fingers snaked through his hair, tugging at it slightly.

Stephen ran his hand up her leg and let it rest at her hip. She shrugged out of her coat, letting the article fall to the floor as she nibbled at his bottom lip. Groaning, he pulled away, trailing kisses down her collarbone. Her hands fumbled at the hem of his shirt, and he nearly hissed as her cold hands pushed the wet, clingy fabric from his skin. His hands slid up, reaching under her tank top. Silently, he returned his lips to hers, and ran his fingers along her stomach, pushing the shirt along with it.

He felt it, waxy and smoother than the rest of the skin around it. He had stumbled upon one of her scars. Stephen pulled away, letting his hands drop. His chest rose and fell, and he could see the hurt in her eyes.

"It's the scars, isn't it?" He winced, knowing that that was what it must've felt like to her. He shook his head.

"I-It's not the time, Shay. I wouldn't want ta go further an' have yeh hate me for it later." He tried to muster a small smile. "Are yeh stayin' here tonight?" Stephen asked, still trying to catch his breath. She nodded, muttering that she had nowhere else to go. He bit his lip and sighed, stepping forward. "I didn't... I didn't mean it when I said that you were fucked up. I didn't. I just...I'm sorry."

"It's alright," she breathed, reaching for her jacket on the floor. "Shit," she whispered, straightening up. "I-I have no clothes. These are it, and my dress, and...everything's with AJ."

"Uh, how...wet are you? I can put yer clothes in the wash, an' I'll let yeh borrow somethin'." She nodded, following him to his room. Shay stood in the doorway, watching him shuffle through a draw. He tossed a shirt to her, and she caught it.

"A Sheamus shirt? I'm not surprised," she chuckled and he offered a slight smile. "I'll...uh, bathroom?"

"Down the hall, first on your left, I'll be here when you're done." She nodded, disappearing into the bathroom. He waited for a few minutes, changed, and waited some more. When she didn't return after twenty minutes, he went to the door and rapped on it slightly. "Shay! Are yeh alrigh'?" He went to knock again, but the door swung open. Shay stood, nodding slowly. Her eyes were red, but she pushed past him.

"I'm alright."

He was about to tell her he knew she wasn't, but he didn't want her to get into another fight. "Fine. Yeh can have the bed, I'll take the couch."

"We're not getting into this argument either," she murmured. The shirt went down to just above her knees, and when she crossed her arms over her chest, it rose slightly. "I'll take the couch. I'm the guest."

"When have yeh ever had a guest sleep on the couch?" His eyebrow hiked up and she shook her head, slightly laughing.

"Why is we can go from strangling each other to being this nice?" She questioned and he shrugged. "Well, we can always share the bed. We're adults, aren't we?"

He nodded, swallowing thickly as he pushed the door to his room open. "After yeh." She nodded, brushing past him. She slid under the covers, and he followed, his hand brushing against her arm. "Why is it that every time I touch yeh, yeh feel so cold."

"You can be my furnace. I'll be your air conditioning," she murmured, and he shook his head with a smile. "Goodnight, Stephen."

"Goodnight, Shay."

Shay woke up the next morning and glanced at the clock. It blinked ten, and a loud knocking came from the front door. Muttering under her breath, she looked back at Stephen, still asleep. Moving through the house, she reached the door and pulled it open. Immediately, hazel eyes were scanning her, scrutinizing everything they could see. Shay connected the eyes to a pretty face, cookie cutter with straight red hair. Behind her, stood a man. Her eyebrows knit together in confusion, but she pushed a smile to her face. "Hi, I'm Shay...," she was about to add that Stephen was asleep, but was cut off.

"That's nice," she stated, eyes seeming to narrow at Shay. Shay looked down and sucked in a breath, realizing who the redheaded woman in front of her was. "I'm Miranda."


	25. Between Love and Death

**Howdy, everybody! How's it going? Anywho, the newest chapter of Moth to a Flame is here! I only own Shay, and apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. Thank you to everyone who is reviewing, and story alerting, and favoriting, etc. It means a lot to me, and I love you all! XD Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**In other news: I have posted a new story entitled Better in Time, so if you want to check that out, go right ahead. :D**

**Have wonderful days/nights/etc.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"M-M-Miranda?" Shay sucked in a breath, hoping the woman didn't register the stutter, or how tense her shoulders got. Standing before her was Stephen's ex-girlfriend, and she was to fend for herself against her. Fantastic, she thought, grappling for something to say. Shay smiled, tilting her head slightly to the side. "Miranda, hey. How's it going?" She felt both their eyes scan over her, and she had to stop herself from fiddling with the hem of the oversized t-shirt draped over her frame. She drummed her fingers against her thigh, suddenly wishing she had came better prepared.<p>

An arm looped around her middle, pulling her in against a chest. She smiled, twisting up to kiss him.

"Mornin'," Stephen murmured, yawning as he dragged his free hand through his hair. "What's going on, love?"

"Miranda's here," Shay smiled, "with..." Shay trailed off.

"Connor," Stephen finished, shaking the man's hand.

"Did we... interrupt something?" Miranda questioned, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, and Shay, again analyzing how little clothes the two had on, and connecting it to the assumption she was making. Shay quickly looked at Stephen, shirtless with a pair of sweats on, and her, donning his shirt. Because that was the total image of innocence. Again, she felt those eyes staring at her.

"Oh! Oh, no,we just got up. Can I help you with anything?"

"So, you're the Shay I spoke to on the phone?" Shay nodded, and Miranda continued. "You said you'd have him call me back when he wasn't busy."

Shay nodded, moving so one arm was behind Stephen, and the other rested at her side. Putting a hand on his chest, she nodded again. "He's been keeping busy, you know how he gets when he's bored." She had no idea where this was coming from, but, while it was at the top of her head, it might as well have been put to good use. Miranda's carefully crafted eyebrow shot up, and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"He has to stop working _sometime_ doesn't he?" Miranda questioned.

"Yes," Shay nodded in affirmation, dropping her hand to lace her fingers with Stephen's, "but, all work and no play makes Stephen a dull boy." She really didn't mean to make it sound that sexual. She could feel the laughter he was suppressing through his chest, and once he knew he had his composure, he nodded.

"Told yeh she was a pistol. Now, is there anythin' we can help yeh with?" Stephen's stance changed, she could feel it behind her. She could still feel her eyes, and Connor's scanning over her, resting on her face, and then her legs, and then back to her face.

"No, uh, we just got back from our honeymoon, and we just wanted to drop by and say hi," Miranda smiled, holding out her perfectly manicured hand to Shay, who shook it. "Maybe we should go out for lunch sometime. Just you and me Shay, I would love to get to know you." Shay smiled again, glancing up at Stephen. Biting her lip, she shrugged.

"Likewise, now, um, if you don't mind, I'm starving," Shay stated, clapping her hands together.

Stephen leaned forward, kissing her cheek. "Lemme get it. Whattaya want, love?" He wrapped his arms around her middle, lacing his fingers together over her stomach. He rested his chin on her head.

"Pancakes, with strawberries... and bananas." Shay replied, and he nodded, giving her a quick peck as he left, waving slightly as he disappeared from view. Leaning her back against the door frame, she crossed her arms over her chest. "I hope your honeymoon was good."

"Yeah, Paris is beautiful in the spring."

"Belgium is gorgeous in the fall, there's snow, but I'm used to the cold," she shrugged. "And Spain's nice too. If you ever feel the need for a really good vacation, go there." She smiled sweetly, tucking hair behind her ear as her name was called. "Yeah, Stephen?"

"Where'd yeh put the flour?"

"Isn't it on the shelf?"

"No, can yeh jus' come here? "

Shay turned, wincing, towards Miranda and Connor. "I am so sorry for cutting this short. Um, I'll see you guys later." They nodded, and Shay could detect the slight air of sarcasm that seemed to roll off them as they waved. She shut the door, and went straight to the kitchen, where Stephen was leaning against the counter. "Th-th-they're gone. I-I could feel her staring at me, like I was some sort of experiment."

"Yeah, an' he was lookin' too, an' not where he shoulda been," Stephen shook his head, anger in his voice.

"Speaking of that, the next time you get Crazy Ex Vibes, let me know so I can put some pants on." She meant it in good humor, but he didn't seem amused. He shook his head again, and her smile fell. Stephen was silent for a few moments.

"I never shoulda put yeh in that position. It wasn' fair, an' last night wasn't fair either. I'm sorry." He ran his hand through his hair. She murmured under her breath, coming over to stand in front of him. Shay shrugged, avoiding his gaze as her fingers grazed the hem of the shirt. She hadn't minded, really. And she felt comfortable around him, with him, in his arms. It hadn't bothered her in the slightest.

What had bothered her was the slight twinge in her chest, how her heart seemed to speed up, and tighten as he pulled her closer to him. That is what frightened her to pieces, the fact that he was close to her. So close, so intimately close that she didn't mind pretending to be his girlfriend. Shutting her eyes, she remembered the sting of his fingers grazing over her body, pulling her flush against his chest as he kissed her neck. And then, the cold burst of emotion when he pulled away in something she assumed was disgust.

Last night didn't go as she thought it was going to.

She thought about it more as she took a seat. Had he not felt that stupid little scar, would they have gone farther. Shay sighed, the warmth of his hands had been comforting, welcomed against the chill, and she believed that, perhaps, they had just been lost in the moment. His thumb had brushed against it, and she had hoped he wouldn't notice. But he did, and he pulled away like she had some sort of disease. It was the scars, right? Her breath quickened, and her hands grabbed at the cloth at her stomach. Stephen's eyebrow rose.

"Are yeh ok, Shay?"

"Yeah, f-fine." Shay nodded, "And, it's okay." Her hand moved forward, and rested on his shoulder. "Really."

"Can I make it up to yeh? Take yeh somewhere. It feels like I should do somethin', yeh know?" Shay nodded, even though she really didn't agree. Why should he have to make it up to her? For putting her in an awkward position, for putting her in the place that absolutely scared her to death? "Just, if somethin' comes to mind, tell me, alrigh?" Again, she nodded, and she felt that they both knew she wouldn't. Still, she avoided the look, the simple _you really don't have to_ look, and folded her hands behind her back. Stephen stood, walking in front of her as he disappeared down the hall. Minutes later, he returned, setting a stack of neatly folded clothing—her clothing—on the counter beside her. "It wasn't fair."

"You're the one who told me that life wasn't fair. And that I, of all people, should know that," she blurted, immediately regretting it. "You told me a lot of things that made me think."

Stephen nodded, murmuring that he knew all too well what he had said to her. Numerous occasions of _get_ _over it _and countless quips about getting into her past. "I really don' need any more reason ta be mad at myself."

"If it helps," she chewed on her lip, thinking for a moment, "if it helps, it helped." He didn't reply as he walked past her, hands in his pockets as his footsteps moved out of earshot. Sighing, she grabbed the stack of clothes, and retreated into the bathroom.

/

Shay tried to ignore the fact that she and Stephen hadn't really spoken in hours, and what was left was the dry and brittle small talk. Was it partially her fault? Yes. She didn't know what to say when his eyes drifted onto her, or how to react when he stopped himself from saying something. Shay curled up into her chair, running her finger over the slight indent in the skin on her hip. She remembered that one, hauntingly well.

"So, you gonna explain those wicked moves ya got there?" A man laughed, and she had jumped at the sudden noise. Punk grinned, plopping next to Shay.

She smiled, "Lot of injuries, lot of time to kill." Her arms wrapped around her middle. "I can do a pretty mean shuffle when I want to." Phil smiled back, nodding as he looked her over again. His eyes fell on the scar lining her jaw.

"You know," he chuckled, shaking his head as he clicked his tongue. He paused, shook his head again, and continued. "Do you know what they told us when you got into that accident?" Shay sat up straight, eyebrow raised, and poised to ask a question. She shook her head, easing back into her seat. "Some people were told that the car slid out of control. That it was raining that night, that the car had simply caught the water wrong. But, I remember where I was that night, Shay. Something happened to me too that night, but... I remember that it wasn't raining. I remember hearing a commotion in the hall, and I heard Adam and Jay trying to wake Randy up."

"Oh," she murmured, unsure of what else to say. What else could be said?

"Then, Nick told us what happened, which was totally unfair, by the way." He spoke, and she rolled her eyes, having grown tired of what was fair and what wasn't. Phil's lips turned at the corners, and he ran a hand through his hair. "But, you wanna know something else? The following day I heard from Adam that you had almost died. Hell, everybody heard it. Me, Stephen, Mike, Cena," he took a breath. "Word traveled, and I realized I didn't want your last memory of your coworkers to be that we were all ignorant jackasses. And, I'll be honest, I thought you were annoying at first. That you were just there, always injured, always silent."

He took a breath, "You're a pretty cool chick. Damn near frightening when you're with AJ," he laughed, and she couldn't help but smile, "but, you're pretty cool."

Silence fell for a minute, and Shay cleared her throat. "Punk?" He looked at her. "Um, I know y-you don't believe in luck, but... how would you explain how I survived? Th-through Nick, and Dave, and John... I really should've been dead by now." She laughed dryly. "If you look at it head on, and you take into account everything I've been through..."

His eyebrow rose. "Are you saying you wanted to die?"

"No, no, not at all," Shay tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "I just... I'm thankful I'm still here, trust me, I am. H-Had it happened to anyone else, there'd be the thought in the back of my mind, behind every voice saying that I'm glad that person is alive, asking how in the hell did they survive."

His hand came to rest on her shoulder, and he gave it a pat, "If you're asking me how you survived something that should've killed you, I'll respond that, Shay, if it should've killed you, it would've." Phil gave her a small smile. "If you should've died by now, you would've. And I'm not saying that, had you died then, you would've died when you should've. No, those are two totally different things. You're still here because you are."

"Thanks." Shay stood, and he followed suit. "Really, thank you."

"It's really no problem. I'll talk to you later, Shay." He smiled, waving as she started down the hall. She frowned, knowing all too well that the more free time she had, the more time she had to think, which, depending on what her mind drifted to, could've been a good or bad thing. Currently, it seemed like a bad thing. Ever since she came back from Florida, she had this weird, tight feeling in her chest. Anxiety, or some bubbling emotion that gripped and gnawed at her. It seemed that she felt more self-conscious than usual.

She wrapped her cardigan around her tighter, wrapping her arms around herself. Her mind tried to reason in why. Why he pulled away. Why he had even started kissing her in the first place. Why she was so bothered that he had pulled away. The questions swam in her mind, and she just wanted silence. For her mind to just shut up and give her some rest. To be able to sleep at night, to be able to be okay with things and just continue on with her life.

"Shay!" She knew that voice, and her nose crinkled as she turned slightly to acknowledge him.

"Cody." Shay tilted her head the side as he jogged to catch her. "H-How can I help you?"

"I just, uh... we haven't talked in a while." He smiled, and she wondered why it was ever so alluring to her. Shay nodded, knowing he was right, and knowing there was a reason for it. She simply didn't want to talk to him. He just didn't take the hint. "And, I was wondering if you ever thought about my, uh... offer. It was an offer, wasn't it? Or, like, if you had thought about it." He shrugged. "Because I have this insane attraction to you, and I think we'd be perfect together."

"Cody," Shay began, stopping herself from biting her lip, "I heard you use that line on Karlee three weeks ago." Her hands went inside her pockets, and she cleared her throat. "And I've declined. Uh, I declined months ago, actually. And I apologize for neglecting to inform you that your pick-up lines won't work on me. B-Believe me, I thought about it. I did, and I just can't see it happening. I told you before, and I'm telling you again. Th-There's nothing between us, Cody."

Cody stood, his lips pursing as he glanced around. With a nervous chuckle he ran a hand through his hair. "I just got rejected by Shay Hart. Huh," he muttered, his hands on his hips. "I think I'm just going to go now. I won't bother you again." She was surprised at how easily he took it, and she had expected him to say that it was her loss. He waved and went off in another direction. She didn't bring up the fact that she knew he had lied. There wasn't a point in it. Her eyebrows rose in surprise and she waved back as he disappeared from view.

Her hand wrapped around her phone, and she checked it. Nothing. No new messages. She would've expected Stephen's name to scroll across the screen, blinking that a new message was waiting for her. But it wasn't. He wasn't asking where she was, or who she was with. They had gotten into something that neither of them really wanted to talk about, and, if the other had, they weren't prodding about it. He was giving her space, she figured. He had picked up on the fact that she wanted to be left alone. She knew that he'd wait, he'd be patient until she told him what was on her mind, or he coaxed her into telling.

She just didn't know how she was going to tell him what was on her mind recently. Until then, though, she'd be perfectly content with the space given. The more space she had, the less she had to talk to him about it. _It_. That one tiny little fear that always plagued her mind. The thought that maybe, just maybe, she was falling in love again. She wasn't afraid of dying, it was love that scared her half to death.


	26. A Different Kind of Silence

**Woooo, Moth to a Flame! Awww, yeah, here we go with another chapter. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. I hope you all had a safe and exciting Fourth of July, and if you're reading this and don't celebrate the 4th, well...I hope your July 4th was still safe and exciting. Thank you all who have reviewed/favorited/alerted so far, I love your feedback. Alrighty, now... on to the chapter!**

**Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"Seriously, Adam?" Her eyebrow rose as she shifted from foot to foot. She cradled the phone in her hand, biting her lip slightly as a sigh passed them. Shay could imagine Adam's shrug as he murmured, saying that perhaps what she had told him was a good thing. Sure, she nodded. Of course it sounded like a good thing, it would to anybody's ears. "A-alright." Someone knocked on the door to the hotel room and she walked over to the bed. Her fingers brushed against a piece of paper. She had found it there that morning after she had gotten out of the shower. Stephen had taken off, gone to the gym, or so his little note had said.<p>

Another knock came, and she went to the door, peering through the peephole. A flash of blond hair confirmed who it was and she opened the door, allowing Jay to enter. He smiled and nodded, taking a seat on the edge of the bed. "Uh-huh, and I'm the one being childish?" She questioned, leaning against the entertainment center as Jay looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "I-I have to go, Adam. Jay's taking me out to lunch. H-How much safer can I be? It's Jay, it's not like I'm skydiving. Yeah," she breathed, rolling her eyes, "have a nice day, Adam." Shay slipped her phone back into her pocket, turning to face Jay with a grin. He returned the expression. Jay stood, walking out the door with her.

"You're not going to tell Stephen where you're going?" He questioned and she shrugged.

"He's busy, and I'm allowed to have a personal life." Shay replied, walking as she spoke. She bit her lip, shaking her head. He hadn't even stayed in the same room last night. No, he had explained to her that he and the guys had wanted to hang out. She believed him, but below that was the slightly obvious fact that she was conflicted over whether or not his absence was a bad thing. She was avoiding the fact that he'd bring it up, anything up. Anything she didn't want to talk about, the fact that nestled deep in her mind was the seed of self-consciousness. She believed, thoroughly believed, that he had been disgusted by her. It made sense, at least in her mind it did, and she wasn't about to go asking around for someone to counter the idea. She had flaws, dozens of them, and the mere feel of one turned him away

"Hey," Jay snapped his fingers and her head whipped to face him. His hand dropped. "Are you alright?" Shay nodded, muttering that she was fine. They exited the hotel and walked to the restaurant down the street. Taking their seats, Shay and Jay sat across from each other. She fiddled with the menu, trying to ignore the strange silence that had settled between them. All of a sudden, Jay set his menu down.

"Don't," he said, shaking his head. Her eyebrow rose, and the question barely passed her lips when he answered. "Don't push him away."

Once. For once she'd like to have a normal conversation with him that didn't drift back to something about her. She had forgotten just how well Jay could read her, just as well as Adam could. To them, she was an open book, and they could see through almost every front she put up. Every alibi that failed was combated with trust. They trusted that she knew what she was doing. And sometimes, she failed their trust. Yet, they still stayed all the same. They stayed, time and time again.

Now, he was reading her. He had picked up on body language she hadn't even been aware she was using, and now he leaned forward slightly, hands folded, waiting. When she didn't respond, he did. "You like him."

"O-Of course I do. He's a good friend, Jay."

"So much, in fact, that you won't push him away. You don't want to push him away, but you think it's a good idea because...well, you never told me why." He nodded, slightly confident in his answer as he gave her a smile. "If it's any consolidation, he'd be my favorite."

Shay smacked his arm, and he laughed. "Jay."

"Seriously, you like him. You smile a lot around him."

"I-I smile a lot around you and Adam, and Chris," she pointed out, a little irritated with where this conversation was headed. She had asked for anything other than something entirely serious. And now, she would've rather talked about her current sleeping issue over some petulant little feeling she couldn't shake.

"Exactly." He tilted his glass at her with a smirk. "He's helped you. And, it'd be stupid to do this to him, to yourself."

"You just don't know when to quit," she muttered with a slight roll of her eyes. "I-If you're getting at what I think you're getting at... Jay, it's not going to happen. I'm not the right kind of person for something like that."

His jaw dropped slightly, shock flashed across his face and faded into an expression of incredulity. "A relationship? Happiness? You're kind of entitled to things like that. It's part of being a human. You get to experience human, well, experiences." Jay explained, tapping his fingers against his forearm. "You're afraid."

She gave a slight laugh, glancing up at him from the intricate design she had traced in the condensation coating her glass. "When haven't I been?"

"John's wedding," he replied. Jay shook his head. He stayed silent for a moment, as if half in contemplation and half in content. Comfortable with the silence even though he had something burning on the tip of his tongue, beckoning to be formulated into words. He twisted his hands. "Shay, I'm sorry."

"For?" Her question hung on the air for another moment before he dragged his hand through his hair.

"I always got on your case about pretty much everything, and I don't think I ever asked you how you felt. I just always assumed, always thought that you were in some dire need of saving and that I, or someone, needed to save you. I never once, in my recollection, thought about what you were going through. I never saw your hell through your eyes, only my own." She let his words sink in, her mind trying to process what he had just said.

"I never should've tried to be so... self-sufficient. I thought that the more you guys knew, the more you were aware of how bad things got, the worse it was. I didn't want to see you guys afraid, or worried sick, but it turns out that my attempts to keep you safe hurt you. You remember when Adam had that fallout with Matt? And how little he spoke of it? W-Well, that's what this was. It was my business, and I thought it could be dealt with on my own, because I didn't need you guys worrying. I was wrong because, had it not been for you guys, I probably wouldn't be here today. And your fears would've come true." More silence followed, but it seemed more of a reverie than discomfort. Then, she drew in a breath and released it slowly. With a small smile, she told him about how she felt. About how she felt about being alive, the confliction she felt about a certain redhead that had so abruptly entered her life. It seemed like she was just talking with her close friend again, like normal.

Normal. She snorted, and Jay raised his eyebrow. Her life had been far from normal, and her like of normality dragged her relationships through the mud. "I just want to be normal," she said. "To not be so afraid, so weird. I can't sleep at night, Jay. Hardly. If I sleep, I dream of dying, of imploding glass and blood, and cruel laughter. Normal isn't being afraid to fall in love, so afraid that you rip off any attachment to anyone who even shows signs of being remotely interested. H-How am I supposed to live like that? It's like pushing people away is my second nature."

Jay gave her a reassuring smile. "Do you know how many times I've stayed when you've tried to push me away? You grew on me like a fungus, and even if you didn't want me there, I'd still be within distance. Chances are, there's someone out there who feels very strongly that you're worth a fight." He smiled again, and she followed suit. "Chances are he's Irish, over six feet, and has red hair," he muttered under his breath, covering with a cough.

"What was that?" She questioned, her eyebrow raised.

Jay shrugged, "Huh? Nothing."

"Uh-huh, what was that?" Shay repeated.

"I said he's probably built, tall, and has great hair." Jay replied, glancing away from her. Shay didn't reply, and she bit her lip. Her excursion with Stephen was on the tip of her tongue, and she wanted to tell Jay. Yet, she didn't. Something told her it wasn't the right time, something Stephen had told her as well.

Yes, he told her it wasn't the right time, but that could've been a lie. She turned her attention to the glass of water in front of her, and she saw her reflection, distorted by the effects of the water, marred by the smooth plane of a scar. Her mind compared it to a picture of herself she had mounted in her hallway. The year 2005, her, Adam, Jay, and Chris were on a boat, and her face was unmarred. A face without age, without blatant imperfections. Oh what a difference seven years made.

And oh how she wished she had that face again. A face without worry, a body at the top of its physical prime, a prime that quickly descended a few months into her relationship with Nick. A smile without secrets, and eyes without pain. Healthier, fresher, better... 2005 was a good year for her. It was her last year of continuous contentment.

"So, Shay, I was just wondering if you had ever thought about seeing a doctor for this sleep thing? I know it's probably just stress, but it hasn't gotten better." Her eyes widened at the mention of a doctor, and she sighed, rubbing her temples.

"Just, let me honestly try, and if nothing changes, I'll consider it." She stood as he paid for their meals. Shay couldn't help but smile at the relief that flooded Jay's face. They had sorted things out, and her own relief at that realization began to settle in. She saw how much her trying, or saying she would, pleased him. How relaxed his posture seemed to be, and how he smiled and ruffled her hair. And, as they walked down the street, she had this feeling like things between them were okay. He had gotten his understanding of her, and she had promised to get help.

They fell into a pace, and soon slipped into one of their conversations. The ones where they were both laughing, smiling, enjoying the present before it slipped away. It had been awhile, and this is what she had hoped for. She had wanted them to hang out like they used to, before her world almost faded. "Cody told us about how you rejected him."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, I laughed, honestly. He acted like he was so hurt by it, as if we were going to tell him he deserved better. Seriously, he waltzed into a room of me, Stephen, Punk, and Bryan, yapping about how the 'blonde bitch turned him down' and that he "can't believe he wasted all his time chasing after her"." Jay laughed, shaking his head as he nudged her with his elbow. "Poor guy was heartbroken."

"I don't think he realizes you're my friends," Shay chuckled with a shrug. "There I go, just shattering hearts with a baseball bat." She smiled and put her hands in her pockets. "How will I ever live with this burden?"

"I don't know, buy him some Häagen-Dazs to drown his ego in?" Jay replied. "As soon as he left we all looked at each other and laughed. He was seriously just ranting and raving saying "she has no idea what she's missing out on"." He mimicked Cody's voice and she shook her head. "Punk spewed the whole 'plenty of fish in the sea' business, and that he shouldn't be so worked up over one tuna."

"You guys compare me to tuna?" Her eyebrow hiked up.

"Blame Punk, not me." His hands shot up in defense. "Well, he probably got the idea from the fact that you and Stephen spend a lot of time together. Great White and the Tuna."

"Dude, sharks _eat_ tunas! Can't I be another shark? I-I mean, if you're going to be giving us team names, make them realistic."

"Great Whites are apex predators. I'm pretty sure they're fearless bastards." Jay laughed, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Tuna."

Shay rolled her eyes with a heavy sigh, "Now everyone's going to be calling me that."

"Better than a lot of things they call you," He smirked, poking her shoulder as they continued on. "Hey... do you taste good mixed with mayonnaise on wheat toast?"

"A Jay is an annoying, chattering bird," she retorted and his eyebrow rose.

"I will push you into the street." Jay threatened with a smile, "But thank you for lunch. It was fantastic."

"Any time. Let's not make it so long between, though. I miss all the time we used to spend together. A-And I'm glad we sorted this out. I-I don't think I could bear losing you." She let out a small yelp as he pulled her into a hug. Returning it, she smiled.

"Me too, Shay. Me too."

/

Shay walked through the door to her hotel room, barely acknowledging Stephen as she slid past him. No hello, no greeting... just silence. But, it wasn't the silence she had experienced before with Jay. No, there were several kinds of silence. The comfortable kind, where you knew what the other was thinking, where it was alright to just lay there and get lost in words that didn't need to be spoken. The awkward kind, the moment after a confession told too soon, or the aftermath of a comment that shouldn't have been spoken. Dead silence, the sound of being alone. Then, there was this; the silence of a thousand screams from a mute mouth. Silence where there were thousands of things you wanted to say, things you needed to say, but you just couldn't bring yourself to say them.

That kind of silence was the worst. And that is what had settled between her and Stephen. He sat on one of the beds, a book in his hands, and she vaguely remembered recommending it to him. She could almost feel his gaze drift from the pages and onto her, but every time she tried to look he had his nose buried in words. Besides, what was there to say? She could count on one hand how much they had spoken within the last week or so, what could she say? It's not like anything she said could make things alright. Deep in her mind she knew that the moment she opened her mouth, she would say something that would link back to the night in Florida.

And why was he mad at himself? That she couldn't understand. He had said it so cryptically, so weary. Shay let out a huff of breath and grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a long-sleeved shirt from her suitcase. She changed quickly and returned to her bed, pulling out her own book to read. This wasn't comfort. This was thick air with little room to breathe, and one of them would suffocate before the other opened the window.

She remembered them fighting earlier, far earlier. How they butted heads, brought out emotions in each other neither wanted to talk about. How rude they were, challenging and borderline ignorant. Back then, there was very few occasions where they didn't speak, or didn't argue. And, as she got up to open the curtains, she figured that this was worse. Shay snorted to herself, finding it ironic that she preferred arguing to this horrendous silence. She wanted to speak, and so she crawled back into her bed and pulled the covers up.

For a while, she laid there, half facing him and half facing the ceiling. Emotions she had thought she had locked away drifted towards the surface. Emotions she didn't want to face, the moment she did was the moment they became real, and experience told her that that emotion only brought chaos. Experience also told her that the more she tried to suppress it, the quicker and hotter it would come back. Most of her mind repeated to her that that kiss meant nothing, that the attraction she felt was purely a result from the contact. Yet, a tiny fragment of her brain was murmuring that this attraction, and all these emotions were there far before she even recognized them, and that it was too late to uproot them.

Because uprooting them most likely meant losing him.

And that was something she just couldn't comprehend.


	27. Of Fear and Misunderstanding

**Woo, here we are with MTAF, and it is getting awesome. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. Thank you to everyone who is reviewing, and story alerting, and favoriting. It means the world to me, and I appreciate all of them, and the feedback.**

**Please read, review, and enjoy! XD**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Shay stood on the apron of the empty ring, wondering what the hell she was doing there, and why AJ had asked her to come. The brunette was cryptic with her call, simply saying where to meet and what to wear. As she caught sight of AJ skipping down the ramp in a pair of sweats and a sports bra, it became all too apparent. "SHAY!" Shay felt a pair of arms wrap around her tightly. "Happy Canada Day!"<p>

Shay's eyes widened as she murmured a small thanks. "AJ."

"Why so wide-eyed?" AJ grinned slipping between the second and third ropes.

"What are we doing?" It was a stupid question, she already knew what was happening. She had hope though that AJ would change her mind and she could go back to the hotel.

Where Stephen and silence were.

She decided that she would stay.

"Well, word around the ocean is that you want to sleep, and exercising will exhaust you, so you can sleep. Regular exercise means regular sleep, see what I mean?" AJ smiled, beckoning for Shay to join her. Hesitantly, she did.

"But... training?" She asked, knowing what Vince had said. Alright, so maybe training was a good idea. She just would've preferred going at it alone, where she wouldn't embarrass herself. Shay pulled her hair into a ponytail and set her hands on her hips.

"Well," AJ started again, eyes scanning over Shay, "It's either training, or you find one of the guys and have sex. Your choice." AJ shrugged nonchalantly and Shay couldn't help but raise her eyebrow. She felt her skin grow hot and she shifted her weight. "I'm just saying, that exercise relieves stress, and sex relieves stress. Seeing as the latter isn't to our disposal, we're going to go for the former." Shay felt herself go to argue, but stopped. Ever since she had started talking to AJ, she had seen a whole new light of the short brunette. Months ago, she saw the quiet AJ, the one who nodded and smiled, whilst keeping to herself. Now it was the sparky, young woman who had a very interesting array of word choice.

AJ stayed silent for a moment, then smiled again. "Would you rather just take a quick run, or something? It's only been a few months, you couldn't have gotten _that_ rusty," AJ nudged Shay with her hip as she hopped back out of the ring. She paused halfway up the ramp. "You know I'm just trying to help, right? It's not like I care if you fall flat on your face, or aren't feeling so well. You're a friend, Shay. I don't usually bring it up because I assume you know, and that you'd rather forget about what's going wrong sometimes." Shay nodded, following AJ outside.

And so they ran on the sidewalk, keeping their paces pretty even. AJ didn't talk much, having absorbed herself in her music. Shay had done the same. After both had grown tired, much in need of a break, they came to a halt in the park. The blond sat on a bench, hunched forward and gasping for breath. "I... swear to fuckin' God, AJ, this shit better help," she mumbled, grabbing at her water bottle and taking a swig. AJ laughed, plopping down next to her and stealing the bottle away.

"Didn't account for the hills, did ya?"

"You never said there'd be hills, and you never said you'd make me run in the sand," her eyes slightly narrowed, and AJ laughed, muttering a small apology.

"No use in going if you're not going hard," AJ shrugged, standing and stretching. "Hey, um. I really don't mean to intrude...or overstep a boundary—"

"AJ, you told me to either run or have sex... I think you've pretty much erased whatever boundaries I had," Shay cast her a pointed look, to which the petite woman shrugged again.

"Anyway, uh... what the hell is going on with you and Stephen?" AJ inquired, raising her eyebrow. "About, oh... a week or so ago, you two were fine. You two were laughing, and talking, and then you come back from Florida and something's up. You two haven't spoken, like, at all to each other." Shay sighed, wondering if it really was that obvious. They had a backstage segment soon, though, so she couldn't beat around the bush forever.

"A lot happened when we got back from the wedding." Shay stated with another sigh.

"Nothing scandalous, I hope." AJ replied, sitting back down beside Shay.

Shay shook her head. "No, uh...," she scratched her temple, "we just got into it. A fight, that is. It's like he brings something out in me, like... fire. We fought, and we both said some things we shouldn't have." AJ nodded along, murmuring an 'uh-huh'. "And I slapped him. Five... ten minutes later and we're in his house, he's shirtless and he's reaching for my shirt."

"Sounds like a good night to me."

Shay cleared her throat, "_Anyway_, he had his hands on me, and it felt nice. Hell, it felt _good_, but then he touched one of my scars and he just pulls away like I'm contagious." The words left her mouth in a flurry, and she shook her head. "I don't even know why I'm so upset over it, it's like he thought I was disgusting... ugly. I didn't have any clothes, so he lent me a shirt... and we almost got into another fight over who got the couch. We ended up sharing a bed, and the next morning his ex comes over."

"Miranda?" AJ's eyes widened. "I met her once. Once. And there's a reason it was only once."

"You noticed it too?"

"Yeah, kinda... weird eyes that followed your every move? How she acted like anyone who even looked at Stephen was trying to get into his pants. Seems like she found you looking like you had already accomplished that," AJ smirked, but it faded. She gave Shay a gentle shove. "Alright, what else happened?"

"I pretended to be his girlfriend, and she left. So, we're in his kitchen and he started acting like he was mad, mad at himself for putting me in that position, and for all the things he used to say to me. Flash forward, and here we are. Not talking. He didn't make an effort to talk to me, and I didn't either. I'm afraid, AJ." She felt her chest tighten, and AJ's reassuring hand on her back. "I'm not mad I had to pretend to be something I'm not. I-I'm used to that. It's... the things I felt, AJ. I-I wanted it, but those emotions... they keep trying to kill me. How long will it be before they succeed? I know I can't be afraid, and that I shouldn't, but I can't help it!"

"You're afraid to fall in love with him." AJ said. It was more of a statement than a question and she tapped her chin with her finger. "Why?"

"Why? M-My rep isn't the best, and hell... she was freakin' gorgeous. E-Even if we did get together, everybody'd be comparing me to her," Shay replied, shaking her head again as she clenched and unclenched her fists.

"Yeah, and they'd be saying how much better you are than her. Miranda wasn't a walk in the park. You should've seen him when he came back in. Guy has half a week off and he comes back the next morning? Still, I don't think he's disgusted by you," AJ chuckled at the last part, shaking her head in amusement. Shay's eyebrow rose, and AJ elaborated. "It's just... with the way he looks at you... the way he talks about you sometimes... it's certainly not the way a guy acts around someone he finds repulsive." Silence fell for a few moments between the two, Shay's face contorting in confusion. "There's a difference between sex and love. Maybe he was afraid too. Afraid that you would hate him for going farther when both of you, or one of you, was unsure of your emotions." AJ stood, helping Shay up as well.

"Besides," AJ smiled, "Stephen has more respect for you than that—the whole almost-sex thing." Shay didn't reply, she just rolled her shoulders. "He wouldn't have done anything that he felt wasn't in the right time, ya know? But, just... try to talk to him, alright?" AJ tilted her head to the side. Shay nodded, and they continued on their way.

/

"You're stupid," Bryan muttered, taking a swig of water as his friend paced around the room. The redhead shot him a glare, and Bryan shrugged. "Well, it's true."

"I'm only avoidin' her cause she doesn' wanna talk to me. She's actin' so strange around me, and I don't know why she's actin' like this. I apologized for the Miranda thing, I told her I was sorry. Why's she so mad?" Stephen asked, arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against a locker. "Sure, we had a fight, but I thought she would've gotten over that."

"You know what helps to clear up things like this? Talking." Bryan stated matter-of-factly. "It also helps if you talk in her general direction and look at her while you say it." Stephen rolled his eyes, muttering under his breath. He felt strange, out of place, and he wasn't entirely sure why. Deep in the back of his mind, he almost wished he hadn't offered to let her stay the night. If she wasn't there, he wouldn't have been caught in so much trouble.

Stephen shut his eyes, remembering the taste of her lips on his. Everything was still vivid to him, the faint smell of her perfume and shampoo, her lips traveling down his neck... had he not been there, he would've sworn it was a dream. Words he shouldn't have said dancing in his mind, he tried to decipher what this really was. Anger was his first idea. He was angry, she was angry, and that was the aftermath; a flurry of kisses, the exhilarating feel of her body against his, and the desire to be close to her.

He tried to pick out where he went wrong, and he decided getting into that argument with her was it. Did he regret it? Slightly, but it would just be another addition to the ever-growing list of things he wished he hadn't done to her. His mind slipped back to that night. Cold hands pushed his shirt over his skin, fingers gently grazing at the muscle there. This was a cross between real life and fantasy, a reality separate from the storyline, yet ever so distant from tomorrow. This wasn't public, broadcasted, etc.; this was her and him, and his hands rested at her hips. Her shirt rode up slightly, his fingers sliding across her stomach, trying to memorize her in case this never happened again.

Then he felt it, and he recoiled. The physical reminders of her past, of the distrust and hurt felt through a string of bad timing and cruelty. Bad timing, this wasn't the time for this, and he didn't want to be just another person in her statistics. He was sure that going farther would secure his place in that tiny little place in her mind reserved for those she despised. He didn't want to be a regret, but, as he pulled away and saw the pain in her eyes, he had wished he had explained it better.

"It's the scars, isn't it?" Her words repeated in his head every time he replayed the scenario in his head. It wasn't the scars, it really wasn't, and he had told her that. He figured she had believed him. The uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach held steady throughout the night, thinking he should've had the guest room made up, rather than an empty room; that he should've taken the couch, regardless of whether or not it would fit his frame. Shortly after, she stopped talking to him, and he found it increasingly difficult to say what was on his mind.

Bryan snapped his fingers and let out a whistle, drawing Stephen's attention. "Have you been paying attention to anything I've been saying?" He asked, shaking his head with an eye-roll. "Come on, it's no secret, Stephen." Stephen shrugged and stood, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Like, just go up and wish her a 'Happy Canada Day'. Just... start a conversation, alright?"

Stephen nodded, getting up and slinging his bag over his shoulder as he left the locker room. He walked to the hotel, which was just across the street from the arena. Taking the stairs, he found his floor and got to the room he was supposed to share with Shay. Entering, and hoping to find her there, he was surprised and disappointed to see she wasn't. Sighing, he rubbed the back of his neck and shut the door.

A note was taped to the back of it, and he recognized the handwriting immediately. He gave a short laugh, dragging a hand through his hair as he plucked it off. "Hangin' with AJ tonight, I'll see yeh tomorrow." He shook his head, shoving the piece of paper into his pocket. "Fantastic." He sighed and cleared his throat, having grown tired of not talking to her. She was avoiding him, blatantly avoiding him

And he decided that tomorrow, he was going to change that.


	28. There's Something Buried In The Words

**Well, well, well if it isn't me again with yet another chapter of Moth to a Flame. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors, and I would like to give you all a huge thank you and a group hug. Your reviews, feedback, and any response keeps me going. I love hearing what you guys have to say, what I can fix, etc. So, here you go, and I hope you enjoy this chapter of Moth to a Flame.**

**Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**You're awesome,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"A-Are you sure, AJ?" Shay mumbled, following the brunette through the backstage area. AJ nodded, casting a smile at the blonde. "They haven't used me in a photoshoot in ages."<p>

"True, but this one said all of us were going to be there." Shay nodded, not fully believing her, but trusting that AJ wouldn't lie to her. "Whether it be for a swimsuit thing, or something else." AJ stated, her hand on Shay's shoulder. They came to a open space backstage, where a few cameras were set up and the Divas were hanging out. Tentatively, she slipped into the seat between Beth and Eve, and watched, her head in her hand.

"Shay!" She turned her head, smiling as Nattie caught her attention, holding up two bikinis. "Which one?"

"Left." Shay replied, tucking hair behind her ear. Nattie thanked her, agreeing with the choice as she went to walk away. She stopped though, and turned back to Shay.

"Are you alright, sweetie?" Shay smiled, albeit weakly, and nodded.

"Sure," Victoria scoffed from the side. "Except for the fact that her boyfriend isn't talking to her and she's a failure to the company. Twelve years in the business, and how much of it was spent on the sidelines?"

Shay nudged a pile of dust with her shoe. "H-He's not my boyfriend."

Nattie sighed, "Leave it alone, Vicks." She glanced between Shay, Victoria, and one of the photographers. "Shay," she began, taking Shay's elbow, "I have to go, are you going to be alright?"

"I'll be fine, Nat." The Canadian nodded, knowing it was less than convincing. She spotted AJ on the other side of the room, chatting with Celeste and Layla. Fantastic, she shook her head, biting her lip as she reassured her cousin. Soon later, she was alone with Victoria, and it was only going to get worse.

"You _do_ realize there's nothing here for you, right?" Victoria gestured to the room. "You're not supposed to be here." The woman shrugged, a false apology. "Sorry, hun."

"Oh, don't worry about me, _sweetheart_. The, uh, I thought all of us had a piece of this." Shay took to chewing the inside of her lip, trying to keep calm. She realized then that this would be one of the things she had to deal with alone, and so far, she thought she was doing well.

"All of us do. You're just not one of us. Look at you, Shay. You don't represent us well." Victoria shook her head, as if talking to a child. Her hand reached out, tracing the scar on Shay's jawline and she winced. "Those scars... they can't cover those up. You're average, plain... they don't want to represent the Divas like that. Don't you understand? You're ugly, Shay. The ugly little duckling, and that's why he doesn't want you. That's why no one wants you."

Shay flinched, hot tears building behind her eyes. She had heard these things before, but the sharp edge in Victoria's voice drove the blade deeper and she subconsciously wrapped her arms around her stomach. It made Stephen's actions, and the taunting, vicious effects of her own mind that much worse. Victoria continued, relaying that she was simply a pity party, that she was a rusty, disposable piece of cutlery amongst fine china.

"I-I may be a lot of things, Victoria," she coughed, clearing her throat as she struggled to suppress the shakiness in her voice, "and you may be right on some of those things, but at least _I_ can survive without breaking down those around me. You're pretty, Victoria, and I don't know you, so don't act like you know anything about me." Shay stated, trying her best to harden her voice. Victoria's face scrunched up as Shay started to walk away.

"Just don't trip on your way out."

"I-I'll try not to," Shay muttered, dragging a hand through her curls as she walked down the hall. She had an appointment to keep anyway, her backstage segment with Stephen was coming up shortly, and she was having a hard time speaking without a stable voice. She wiped at her eyes, narrowly dodging Bryan in the hall, who did a double take.

Soon, though, she found where she was supposed to be. Stephen was standing, his back to her, and looking around. Looking for her, she presumed, as she went straight to her spot. His eyes fell on her, and she could see the worry flash in his face. "Shay...," he trailed off. "A-Are yeh okay?" Now, she wondered what she looked like. Eyes red, face flushed, quivering lips... that must've been it, and she apologized under her breath. His hand reached for her face and she swiped it away.

"I-I'm _fine_, Stephen." She pinched the bridge of her nose and shut her eyes tightly, taking a few breaths in to calm herself. He sighed, shaking his head, not really used to her keeping him at an arm's length away. Stephen saw the flicker in her eyes when she looked at him, how her face and posture seemed to falter. A few moments later, she reopened her eyes and cleared her throat. "R-ready?"

"Shay," his voice was low, soft, and she could hear a slight undertone of worry. "What happened?"

"Nothing. Now, stop it. We're about to start," she glanced away, taking another moment before returning her gaze to him.

***On-Screen***

**"Seriously?" Shay scowled, shaking her head as she crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not going to go into how ridiculous this situation is, or debate the fairness of it all, but that was juvenile." She spoke, turning to Sheamus and running a hand through his hair and down to caress his jaw. "How are you holding up?"**

** "Well, I won' be competin' tonight," he rolled his eyes, wincing as he went back to touch his neck. "An' I feel like crap, but I'm glad yeh weren't out with me tonight. He coulda gone after yeh."**

** She chuckled, "He could've." She slid closer to him, resting a hand on his forearm. "If you can't compete, I guess I should bring you back to the hotel. You know... rest." Shay smiled, coyly as she kissed his cheek. "I take concussions very seriously."**

** He nodded, his hand falling to her hip. "Uh-huh, very seriously."**

** "So, uh, I'll drive, and you can just spend the night in bed. And, I'll just have to keep you up all night." His eyebrows rose, a smirk spreading across his lips . "I'm worried about you, so... no sleep." **

** "An', how do yeh plan on keeping me up?" He cocked his head to the side, trading the smirk for a crooked grin as she leaned up, placing a kiss on his lips. As he started to pull away, she brought him back in, leaving a searing, lingering kiss. When she finally did pull away, she kept a hand on his chest.**

** "I'll figure something out."**

***Off-Screen***

Shay turned, about to head off in the other direction when a hand enclosed around her wrist. "Shay, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" He nearly flinched at the icy look she shot him, and his shoulders slumped. "Shay..." This was his chance to talk to her, and he was going to make the effort. She seemed surprised he was speaking, but she still tugged her wrist free of his grasp. Shay shook her head, steadying her shaking shoulders as she walked away. He wanted to go after her, make her talk to him, make her listen, but instead he threw his hands up in exasperation, cursing under his breath.

/

"I tried, Bryan, an' she didn't wanna talk to me." He stated, gesturing with his hands as Bryan sat on the bench, shrugging. "See? She doesn't even want to be near me." Stephen sighed, shoulders sagging as he ran a hand through his hair.

The door whipped open, and Stephen turned just in time to catch a flash of brown hair and a slap to the face.

"Bastard." AJ spat, eyes narrowing as she went to smack him again. He caught her wrist, gently enough not to hurt her.

"AJ, mind tellin' me why yeh hit me?"

"Do you have _any_ idea what the hell Shay's going through, or what she's thinking?" AJ scowled, glaring at the taller man. "I don't know what the fuck you said to her, but it was upsetting. I see her walking away from you, in tears, and she refuses to tell me what's wrong."

"AJ, she was cryin' when I saw her."

"Me too," Bryan slipped in and both of them sent him a glare.

"Shut up, Bryan."

"As I was sayin', I saw her like that. I tried to talk to her, an' she blew me off. We went through with our segment, an' then she jus' walked away. Still in tears. Still not talkin' to me." He threw his hands up again, anger starting to set in. Anger, disbelief, worry. "I'll go talk to her, alright?" Stephen offered, shaking his head as AJ rose a brow.

"No shit. Now, go." She slid away from him, gesturing towards the door with a sweep of her arm. "Because both of you are kinda being childish over this entire thing." AJ huffed, folding her arms over her chest and rolling her eyes as she left the locker room. Silently, Stephen waved behind him before leaving too.

He found Shay waiting for him in the parking garage, and he put his bag in the trunk of their rental. Of course, the segment... she'd have to drive him, because he had a "concussion". Shay gave him a slight nod, and he slid into the passenger seat. Some silence was fine, especially in certain times. This was ridiculous. But he waited, as patiently as he could. He waited, calmly with his hands in his pockets as she checked in, waited as they took the stairs, and waited as she opened the door to the room. Stepping inside, he rubbed the back of his neck, trying to read the emotions in her face. When she turned away, he finally decided that it was time.

"Shay, can yeh jus' talk to me?" He asked, and she looked at him over her shoulder. He wanted things the way they were, when she was as open as she wanted to be, feeling free enough to let him into her life, into her past, and into everything she had tried so desperately to hide. Had this been anyone else, he wouldn't have been so worked up over it, so needing for conversation and normalcy. She was normal, an everyday occurrence; a privilege, he realized. He wanted to, but this wasn't the time to tell her. "Soon," he muttered under his breath and her eyebrow rose.

"Yeah, Stephen?"

"Why have yeh been so upset recently? Well, today. Why haven't yeh been talking to me? Is it because I wasn't talkin' back, or what?" Stephen sent off more questions than he had wanted, he had meant to ease into each one, not fire them all off at once. Taking a breath, he released a heavy sigh. "Why don't we jus' start at the beginning, hm?"

"W-Why don't we just start with today, Stephen." Not a question, a statement, and she gave him a once over. He didn't seem to be studying her, gauging a reaction, searching for flaws or disparities. His eyes connected straight with hers, soft as he nodded and complied.

"Alright, today. What happened?"

Shay shook her head with a laugh. "I hate this place, Stephen. There once was a time where I thought this place was beautiful, Stephen. Really. I used to think it prestigious, an honor and a shot at something more. Then they started hiring based off of looks, not talent. Sure, they always used their women more... provocatively, but at least we had some respect. Take a look, Stephen. How many of us are wrestlers turned models, and how many are models who know how to do a cartwheel? Sure, it's fine when you find something you love doing something you love. It's not fine when they try passing one thing for another." His eyebrows knit in confusion. She was upset about the Divas? That upset over something that had been going on for years? "A-Alright, maybe I don't _hate_ it, but, let me just say that I remember why I always refused to change in the Diva's locker room." He paused.

"Shay..."

"And I am just like everybody else. I-I'm _good_ at what I do. I was raised by some of the best, and they don't have any right to tell me I'm not worth the space. I'm worth the space, I'm just an eyesore." Her shoulders rolled in a shrug, as if this were just some offhand comment on a miniscule aspect of the universe.

An eyesore? He thought to himself, wondering where in the hell she had gotten that snippet of nonsense.

"I-I had a photoshoot today. Well... I didn't. Everybody else did, but not me. Victoria told me why, that twelve years meant nothing, that I wasn't really a Diva," Shay scoffed, "I'm a wrestler, not a fuckin' Playboy model. Which brings us back to the fact that I am simply there. Just there, no real presence. Average, plain, and an ugly duckling with no hopes of ever becoming an elegant swan. Swan? No. Try Canadian Goose." She laughed at her own joke, returning to shaking her head as her voice started to shake. "They've always told me I was nothing. M-Michelle... she tortured me for the hell of it. I consoled a hysterical Mickie James over half the shit she pulled on-screen, because that sunk deeper than it was ever meant to, and I swear I am so thankful I never got put into one of those because I wouldn't have been able to handle it. I _understand_ Michelle had her problems, her issues... she just couldn't see mine as anything of significance. I'm okay, I got used to it. I got used to the twins telling me John was such a generous soul. I buried it, buried every little thing they told me." Shay took in a deep breath, struggling to keep the tears from falling.

"Until today," she continued. "I was told that there was nothing for me here, that I didn't belong, that I didn't represent the Divas well. That I was plain and average, and that I was ugly. Sh-She said I wasn't a part of things because I was so sick, that they couldn't cover up my scars, and that no one wants a tarnished, dim little piece of silverware that could never hold a candle to all the fine china surrounding me. Uh, and don't forget that she said nobody wanted me, that nobody would _ever_ want me." Her voice was shaking, shoulders slumping as she dug her fingers into her sides, trying to get a hold of something stable.

He wanted to tell her that he wanted her, but it probably wasn't the best time, not when she was still mad at him. His eyebrow rose, and he scoffed. "What? And you believed her?" How could she? Didn't she see what he saw? Her eyes misted over, and his face fell. She gazed back at him, slowly blinking as a tear rolled from her eye. "Yeh believed her." His voice was soft, filtered with some sort of emotion she couldn't register and he stepped forward, drawing her closer to him. Stephen held her to his chest, murmuring as he tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "Yeh shouldn't have."

Her shoulders shook again, but it was a laugh. Pulling away from him, she shook her head. "Why not? She was right. And it's ironic that you're the one telling me I shouldn't believe those things when you think so yourself."

"_What_?" Honestly confused, his words caught on his throat and his eyebrows scrunched up together. He didn't think any of that, nor had he treated her as such, not that he could remember.

"You sound... genuinely surprised," Shay muttered, gathering her hair over her shoulder. She twisted the locks before letting them go and repeated the process.

"Because I am. How on earth did yeh get that idea in yer pretty lil' head?"

Her face fell, even farther than it already had and a sigh slipped through her lips. "Y-You think I'm disgusting." Shay's voice barely hovered above a whisper, and he looked down. He didn't, and he wished he didn't have to explain it to her. "You took one feel, one tiny little trace of a scar and it turned you off."

He didn't appreciate her assumptions, particularly if they weren't correct. "It brought me to my senses." He gritted, calming himself down.

"It was like I was contagious. Like this," she gestured to her jaw with a frown, "like all of these are imperfections that you didn't want touching your skin." Shay approached him, standing barely an inch away from him. Grabbing his hand, she slid it slightly under her shirt. He felt it again, and another smaller one nearby. Her eyebrow rose. "I'm not contagious."

He shut his eyes, trying to control the urge to press her up against the wall and kiss her, make her feel the beauty he saw, make her feel everything he couldn't formulate into words. Make her his. "You're contagious, Shay. Jus' not in the way you think yeh are. And if yeh think I pulled away because I was disgusted, you're...," he didn't want to say crazy, "yer wrong." He breathed, dropping his hand. "I told yeh, it wasn't the right time. I felt that scar, an' I didn't think yeh were pathetic, or weak. I felt skin. Just skin. It wasn't the right time, and I didn't wanna be just another regret, just another reason for you to harbor ill-feelin's towards people."

Shay took a step back, wiping her eyes with her thumbs. She regretted it now, bringing it up, and letting it get to her. Still, she didn't want to back down. There was still time to admit she was wrong; the moment she started to believe it. "Uh-huh."

"Both of us know that goin' farther wouldn't have been a good idea. Trust me, you're anythin' but undesirable."

"I'm sure, because I have so many men knocking down my door, while women are just dying for a taste of the Great White Sheamus," she rolled her eyes, shaking her head with a frown.

His laugh was sarcastic, as if her comment was utterly ridiculous. As if he couldn't believe it. "Now you're just sayin' things because you don't wanna admit you were wrong."

Shay sighed, defeated. Crossing her arms over her chest. "I-I just... I didn't think of that. I just honestly believed that you were sickened by it. I-I mean, how could I not? First time I'm even close to the subject of sexual intimacy, and he pulls away at a physical flaw." He nodded, understanding because he was afraid she'd back away when he first kissed her.

"Yeh trust me, don't you?" She nodded, murmuring that she did. "Then you'll believe me, won't yeh?" Again, she nodded and he rubbed his neck again. "Can yeh tell me why it matters so much?"

"I-I just don't want you to think I'm disgusting, or ugly. I don't want people to think that of me without actually knowing me," she murmured, wringing her hands together.

"A lot of people will look at you and not like what they see. A lot of women, women like yerself, look at me an' don't like, or enjoy, what they see. And I understand. I can't please everybody, and right now there's only one woman I'd physically go out of my way to please. Otherwise, I don' really care if a bunch of people think I'm ugly. I'm not as... pigmented as some of the guys on the roster, but I get by alright." He shrugged and grinned with a slight laugh. "So you shouldn't care either." He leaned his back against the wall, and she stood beside him.

"I-I-I think you're beautiful." Her eyes widened and her face flushed red as his head pivoted to look at her. "I-I...can't believe I just said that, but you're beautiful, Stephen. A-And you deserve to have beautiful people around you."

"So... you'll stay then?" She pursed her lips, deep in thought with her mind barely registering what he had just said, or the meaning behind it. Shay nodded.

"I-I feel so ridiculous." Shay muttered. "I'm sorry, for uh...yeah. Now that I think about it, yours makes so much more sense than mine." He grinned.

"Don't worry about it, I'm just glad we're talkin' again," Stephen said. "It's understandable, why yeh'd feel that way. Victoria's wrong, though. An' so was Michelle, an' the twins, an' all them. But, yeh know, that's just my opinion," he flashed her a smile and shrugged, stepping away from the wall. "It's getting kinda late."

"Th-that it is," she chewed on her lip as she plopped down on the nearest bed, pulling her suitcase closer to her. "What? You're looking at me like I'm not supposed to be here."

"Oh, uh, no..." Stephen shook his head, hand on his neck and he was halfway into the bathroom. "Yeh just haven't really stayed with me in a few days. It's good to have yeh back." He peeled off his shirt, his lips turning at the corners as she smiled shyly. "An' Shay?"

"Yes?"

"Happy Belated Canada Day."


	29. Pick The Pieces Up and Walk Away

**Hey, here's another chapter of Moth to a Flame, I only own Shay and I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors. So this chapter is a bit... happier, I guess, perhaps lighter-toned, but yeah. Than you to everyone who had reviewed and tuned in so far, you are all amazing and I love your feedback, so please leave me some. :) I have a new story up, Say Goodbye, so if you want to check that out, go right ahead.**

**Please read, review, and **

**With love. to infinity and beyond,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>"I'm actually feeling a lot better," Shay stated with a smile on her face, having the confidence to relay what was in fact true. She had been feeling better, better than she had in a while and finally felt like things may have been looking up. Jay's smile widened before slightly faltering as he leaned forward, an eyebrow rising.<p>

"Feeling better as in you're sleeping? Or feeling better as in you're ready to be in the ring?" At this she reclined slightly in her seat and crossed one leg over the other.

"As in I'm getting more sleep. I'm not ready for the ring. I'm actually working on that with AJ." She straightened up slightly and Jay patted her knee.

"That's great," he was genuine, not biting or sarcastic with obvious undertones of knowing she could be better. "Tuna."

"Ah, I see that's not going to get old anytime soon," she replied with a chortle, standing and brushing off her jeans. "I-I just... still have nightmares and I've tried everything. Herbal remedies, relaxation techniques, nothing works, Jay."

"Well, you're at least a third of the way there," he shrugged and she dragged her hand through her hair, letting the locks fall loosely around her face. He knew though, knowing here, that that wasn't good enough. She wanted to be better, and he had a feeling that he knew why. Jay knew, or at least had a decent hunch, that her desire to be better was two-sided. She wanted it for her because she wanted to be the healthier woman he remembered. She wanted it for _him _because he made her feel like she used to. He made her want to, not fix her flaws, but see them in different lights. Jaycould see it in her eyes, the person she used to be, and it was refreshing. And, he could see the person she used to be, and the person she longed to be, every time a certain redhead caught her eye.

"Yeah," she murmured, "a third is better than nothing."

He bit his lip, his hands gesturing as if that would make his point any clearer. "Have you ever thought about going back? Maybe that would help." Shay shrugged in reply, having actually thought about it before, but never acted on it. She had always been too afraid, too doubtful that it would bring her peace, and so she had never went back to that little stretch of road. Shay cleared her throat and gave a small smile.

"I need to go, Jay. Stephen's driving me to my meeting with Vince." She was halfway out his hotel room door when she stopped and turned back to him. "I have, though.," she stated, slightly shifting her weight. "Thought about going back."

"Shay," Jay started, and her eyebrows rose, "you seem to be in a good mood today."

"Eh, today feels like it's gonna be a good day. Just one of those feelings, you know?" Shay assured him, smiling and waving as she closed the door behind her. Meeting Stephen by his car, she slid into the passenger seat. "Morning."

"Mornin'," he greeted with a nod. "Sorry I left this morning. Alberto wanted to go over a few things for Money in the Bank. And I didn't want to wake you, yeh seemed to be sleepin' pretty well."

"I know, it's like AJ workout sessions are miracles," Shay laughed as he pulled into the street. "Or maybe it's just timing, you know?" She couldn't quite place it, but the morning started off with her feeling really good, with the sun shining and the faint chirping of a bird. "H-Have you ever just gotten up and felt so freaking fantastic you couldn't really explain it?"

He chuckled, glancing down at her before nodding. "Yeah, I guess. It's a bit out of the blue, not sayin' there has to be a reason for your good mood."

Shay shrugged, "I was just thinking, the other day after we were talking, that the past is the past. That if I keep...dwelling like I do, I'll just wind up scared, and alone, and h-hurt. Not saying that I'm completely alright now. I guess I'm just... chippy today."

"Beats not talkin'," he gave her a half-smile, pulling into the parking spot. She tried to fight how natural this felt, versus the uncomfortable silence that hung between them a few days ago. This felt right... and it kind of scared her. Being this comfortable around someone, some man, and not wanting to high-tail it to the moon. They had finally gotten back on the same page, and she was glad. It was a huge misunderstanding, even if she did feel kind of to blame for it, her mind instantly jumping to a conclusion. Regardless, they were talking again, back into the same, steady pace as before.

Only this time, something felt different. She thought it might have something to do with the fact that when she looked at him, saw his eyes or the curve of his smile, she saw somebody she could see in her future; somebody she hoped would be in her future. Somebody she wouldn't mind being affiliated with, somebody she had feelings for.

And that was something she never thought would happen again. To be honest, it was a little scary. She chortled, thinking to herself that Jay already knew, and he had known for weeks.

"Somethin' funny?"

"Oh, uh... Jay really just knows me more than he should." Shay replied, "So, here we are."

"Yep."

"And I'll see you right after, right?" Stephen nodded, offering her a good luck wish as she got out of the car. He had a signing to get to, her a meeting, and as she walked through the halls to get to the makeshift office, her heartbeat started to quicken. She was worried, a little bit frightened at what he might have to say to her. Shay opened the door and slid in upon his approval and took the seat he offered. "Mr. McMahon."

"Ms. Hart, it's a pleasure to see you. You're looking well." He gave a slight nod, folding his hands together over his desk. She murmured a small thanks, pulling a smile to her face. "Now, how are you?"

"I'm doing better," she confided, affirming that she wasn't exactly 100% just yet, and that she was well aware of the matter of time. She wasn't injured, she should've been wrestling.

"Well, I like you, Shay. You've been with this company for twelve years now, and I think it's time for you to get a bigger storyline." She was confused, she was mostly in tag teams, or a valet, barely ever getting anything alone. She started off as an interviewer, simply enough, and valeted for Jericho and Christian, a few others here and there, but she had never gotten a lengthy solo run. Whether she was face or heel depended on who she was put with at that time. Hell, she hadn't been a primary face or heel, ever, and despite the fact that she had a decade under her belt, she didn't think this would happen. "Something separate, something solo."

"S-Solo?" Her eyebrow rose, and she relaxed in her chair. "V-Vince, I'm hardly-"

"Used? Yes, but you stuck through it all, didn't you. Surely you remember the Smackdown Kissing Booth." Yes, she did, and she'd rather forget having to run away from The Boogeyman. Marty was fine, the worms however, were not. Shay cringed and Vince chuckled. "Anyway, you'll be given the opportunity, once you've proven you're worth it. They love you with Stephen, but it's time you've turned heel. The details aren't worked out yet, but I think you're the best choice. You're my preferred choice."

"So... I'm possibly turning heel, _if_ I can get myself together?" She processed what he was saying, and tapped her finger against her chin. He had a possible new twist for her, a possibility for being by herself in the ring. It was a possibility, it wasn't set in stone, and it was up to her. The 'yes' was catching on her tongue. Of course she wanted to, why wouldn't she? A valet and a partner for so long, it was time for a change. Vince nodded.

"It'll take us a while to align everything, so.. a month and a half. In a month and a half, about the end of August, you'll be returning to the ring in a match, and for the next couple of tapings, if you're looking good, you'll be set up and everything will fall into place." Shay couldn't help but smile, and she nodded. It wasn't a lot of time, but she wanted this. She wanted to be better anyway, this was merely more incentive. "So, are you interested?"

"I-I, um... of course," she wasn't entirely sure if she could pull off what he wanted, but she would try. "W-Why me, though? With all due respect, and I'm not challenging your decision. Just...curious."

"Because you're one of the only people no one remembers being heel, you've been in the background, and it's about time I started putting you to actual use." He stated, a gentle smile actually coming to his lips, fairly odd. "Just pull it together."

"Yes, sir." They shook hands, and he dismissed her. All the way down the hall, her smile wouldn't falter. It wasn't being handed to her, not exactly. She'd have to work for it, and work hard. She made a note to call Adam about it later, but, as for right now, she was on her way to see Stephen.

/

Shay pushed the door open with a broad smile on her face. Stephen followed, starting to wonder exactly why she was so absorbed in trying to get him to 'broaden his flavor palette', as she had described.

"I still can't believe you've been in the States for, what... five years now, and you have only ever had vanilla ice cream?"

"There is nothing wrong with vanilla," he protested, and she turned to face him. "Nothing."

"I never said there was, I just said it was kind of boring. When I get vanilla, I usually put caramel and chocolate and all sorts of extras," she shrugged, pushing him to stand in line. He didn't move and he cocked his head to the side with a smirk.

"Problem?"

"I hate you," she stated, moving to stand in front of him.

"Sure yeh do, that's why yer here with me, in an ice cream parlor. Do you treat all the men you hate with such...delicacies?" His eyebrow rose and he smiled as she tried to mirror the expression. Shrugging again, she joined the small line and he stood behind her, hands in his pockets, and waiting for her response.

"Only the attractive ones. Like I was saying, vanilla is good sometimes. Sometimes you need something else. Like cookie dough, or Rocky Road..." She named off a few more.

"Yeah, but yeh ruin it when yeh put all those toppings on. Yeh gotta enjoy the simpler things, Shay. There's not always a need for somethin' huge, or fantastic. Sure, we have different flavors in Ireland, I've always preferred vanilla. It's great back home, it's great here." He informed, his hand lightly resting on his shoulder. "How about this, yeh get your favorite flavor, I'll get mine, and I'll try whatever flavors yeh want me to." Shay smiled, agreeing to this .

"Well," she groaned slightly, "I see your point with the whole vanilla life metaphor, so... alright." Shay smiled, nearly pressing her face up to the glass window as she pointed to all the flavors. Some he made faces at, because they sounded truly disgusting, while others he nodded at for amusement. He enjoyed seeing her like this, so carefree and open. She ordered, strawberry, and he realized he probably should've known that all along. Of course she would like strawberry ice cream, just like she favored strawberries, and the strawberry flavor. She always tasted like strawberries. When she told him to take a seat, and that she would be back, he followed her orders and sat patiently while she chatted with the teen behind the counter.

When she rejoined him, she had the dish of strawberry in one hand, and a small, paper plate with tiny little spoons on it, each full of a dollop of flavor. Naturally, he knew of several flavors, he wasn't an idiot, or ignorant. He just chose to not taste them. "I'm gonna get fat," he mumbled, glancing between his dish and the plate. Shay rolled her eyes.

"You'll burn it off at the gym tomorrow morning." She took a seat across from him, inching the plate forward a little more. "And if I show you something better than vanilla?"

"I'll answer anythin' yeh ask." Her grin worried him, but he couldn't go back on his word, so he went along with it. Trying each of the four she had laid out, he only found one to be pretty decent. They weren't bad, although he did cringe a little at the mint chocolate chip, still, he preferred vanilla. She slumped back, shaking her head with a defeated sigh before turning her attention to her own ice cream. "Sorry," he smiled with a shrug, "vanilla always wins." Deciding to take a walk, they discarded the plate and took to the outside, walking closely beside each other.

"You know, I usually order a cone, but I think I'll make an exception today," Shay smiled, dipping her spoon back into her dish of strawberry ice cream. His eyebrow rose, a smirk spread across his lips and he leaned in slightly.

"Makin' exceptions fer me, eh? Might as well jus' jump the shark an' get married. There's a neat little chapel jus' up the roa—," he was cut off as she shoved a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth. As she retracted the spoon, his eyebrows rose again. "Thanks for the warnin'."

"Any time," she looked satisfied this time, her shoulder brushing against his arm, "How do you feel about that one?"

It reminded him of her and he licked his lip as he turned to face her. He paused, thinking for a moment on how to respond, and how to phrase it in a way that didn't overstep a boundary. So, he shrugged, he smiled, and he said that it was delicious. He liked the taste, the little explosion of a sweet, sharp flavor, and he wondered if it tasted the same on her lips. "Shay," he began and she nodding, confirming he had her attention, "can I ask a few questions?"

"Only if you answer some of mine." He nodded; that was fair, and he had to bite back the first question that came to his mind. He wouldn't ask that one yet, not yet, because it probably wasn't the right time. So, his mind flew to the next.

"Can I ask yeh what the best thing about Canada is?"

Shay chuckled, tucking hair behind her ear as she gestured to herself. "I am obviously the best thing about Canada." He shook his head with a smile. "But seriously, it's pretty. Uh, hockey, maple syrup, pretty much everything we're known for. M-My favorite thing is the climate. Sure, it's cold as hell sometimes, but there's nothing like curling up on the sofa in an afghan, soaking in the warmth of the covers and the fireplace. Maybe someone's arms, or, if you're like me, your cat."

"Jericho, right? Your cat's name is Jericho." He remembered her mentioning it before, and she seemed amused at his attention to detail.

"Yeah, his name's Jericho. Uh, Chris got him for me for my birthday about... six, seven years ago. He's a grumpy kitty," she trailed off, stopping herself from going on a ramble. "He just about hates everyone else."

Stephen smiled slightly, looking at the woman standing next to him and trying to compare her to the woman he knew before. They were the almost the same, just little differences that made all the difference. She smiled more now than she used to, eyes seemed brighter, smile seemed more sincere, the image of things being pulled together. He wasn't sure if she had entirely let go of her past, accepted it, or if this was just a really good act. It could've been an act, he had seen pictures of her in the past, where her smile didn't reach her eyes and she was beneath Adam and Jay's shoulders, crutches tucked neatly under her arms. Anybody could smile and say they were fine. He wondered what things would've been like had she never fell for John, and had he actually spoken to her.

John's mistake, he was glad for it, as awful as that sounded. He was glad she gave up on the man, that she had moved on. Suddenly, she was speaking again. "Vince gave me a month and a half."

"For?" He could guess what that meant, but she was already continuing.

"To get back in the ring," she supplied the comment, "and I have a goal."

"And that is?" He asked. They had tossed their empty plastic dishes into a nearby recycling bin and had started on their way back to the car.

"To be better than I was. I-I was pretty good, not to toot my own horn, or anything, before things started going downhill. Yeah, I always was a little klutzy, and I guess it got worse with time, but my performance started going downhill. It got worse with every injury I got, with all the time I wasn't practicing, or when I was sidelined for some stupid reason. Then I sat out for two years after a car accident and a bad trip down the stairs. C'mon, out of my twelve years in this damn company, how much of it was sidelined? I haven't been in a match since March, because I let it get to me."

"Which was completely okay," he added. "You needed time off, Shay. To sort things out, and yeh have time to get yourself to where you want to be. What if I sorted out a workout team for yeh?" He was half-joking, not really expecting her to say yes.

"Workout team? Sure, because I need a pep squad of big, sweaty men putting me into chokeholds." Shay rolled her eyes as a small smile formed on her lips. "Th-thanks, though." Shay was silent for a moment. "Is that all you wanted to ask me? What my favorite thing about Canada was?"

"Eh," he shrugged, "I had a couple more, but we got sidetracked. So, anythin' yeh want to just tell me?" They had reached his car, which was soon joined by another with AJ, Beth, and Nattie all seated inside. The girls were her ride, intent on having a 'girl night'. The mere thought was slightly frightening to her. He had walked her to AJ's car, and she had one hand on the open windowsill, the other by her side.

She thought about telling him about the prospect of a new storyline, but decided against it. She wouldn't mention it until she had more of an idea of what was happening. "AJ, Nattie, Beth, and I are having a, quote on quote, 'sleepover'." AJ's idea, not hers, but the brunette had a way of dragging Shay into things. Besides, the two were friends, and as AJ put it, 'should start doing things friends do'.

He smirked, amusement painting his face as he leaned in towards her. "Am I invited?"

Shay sucked in a breath, realizing how close he was to her. She touched his chin, her head tipping to the side as she studied his face. Resting a hand on his shoulder, she smiled. "Sorry, no boys allowed."

"That's good, 'cuz, I'm a man." She heard AJ's giggle, and fought the urge to roll her eyes.

"Then we'll be painting our nails, and doing each other's hair, and then, we'll watch chick-flicks and swoon over Channing Tatum," she counted off, noting his apprehensive look with a smile.

"On second thought...I'm good," He winked at Shay, "It's good though, some female interaction." He reached around her, his hand grazing against her side as he took a hold of the door handle behind her. A small, red convertible; AJ was in the driver's seat, with Nattie and Beth in the back. Opening the door, he held it there for a moment until she slid into her seat. Shutting it, he cleared his throat with a crooked grin on his face. "Now ladies, don't yeh get into too much trouble, an' make sure she comes home safe tomorrow, alrigh?" He joked, poking her in the shoulder with a laugh.

"Oh, we'll keep her safe, Stephen." AJ called, nudging Shay with her shoulder. "Just going to be getting into girly stuff, we won't harm a hair on her pretty little head, right girls?"

"Affirmative, she couldn't be safer." Beth nodded, very seriously until she broke down into a grin. "Chill out, man." Shay shot him one last 'help me' look before AJ revved the engine.

"See yeh tomorrow, Shay." He stated, waving as she did too. And, as they drove away, he could hear Nattie say, 'why aren't they together yet?'

Yeah, he wondered, the thought re-entering his mind.

_Why weren't they_?

/

"I _knew_ it!" AJ repeated her mantra, pointing her finger at Shay before skipping around her again. "I _knew_ it. You thought I wouldn't notice it, but I did." AJ smirked with confidence, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned in next to the blonde's face. "Tell him."

"No," she repeated for the third time since mentioning the fact that she wanted there to be something between her and Stephen. AJ frowned.

"Why not? It's 2012, you can ask a guy out."

"B-Because I'm just not going to." She stated, tucking her legs beneath her as she sat on the small couch in AJ's hotel room. Nattie shrugged from where she sat painting her toenails.

"Leave her alone about it, AJ. It's going to happen sooner or later. I mean, did you see the way he was looking at you, Shay? It's like no one else was there." She finished, capping the bottle before tossing it to the waiting Beth. "And you two were walking so close..." Nattie trailed off. "Uh, about the other day with Vi—"

"Don't worry about it, Nat," Shay shrugged. "I took care of it. Moving _on_, I'm not going to tell him any time soon."

"Honey, are you scared?" Beth asked, tilting her head back to look at the other blonde. Shay nodded, murmuring a small yeah.

"It's... been a while, guys. I just.. never thought I'd feel that way again. A-and it's not that I'm afraid he'll hurt me, or that he'll hit me or tear me down," she could feel the tears starting to prick her eyes. "I'm afraid that it'll be too good to be true, I'm afraid that it won't last because it never does. I know that now is different than all the other times, but I'm just afraid that I'm not meant for that beautiful romance, and love, and all the sweetness of looking into someone's eyes and seeing your soulmate." She felt AJ come to sit next to her, and the reassuring arm around her back followed by a head on her shoulder. Beth and Nattie joined in, tightly putting an arm or two where they could manage. "I'm kind of scared that, if it does happen, that it won't last. That I'll do something, or something will happen, and I will be on the same train as before." Shay sucked in a breath, wiping the tear from her eye as she tried to wrestle herself out of the group hug the other three had surrounded her in. They joked around, drawing a smile from the blonde.

"He is one nice hunk of white chocolate, and good girls don't let chocolate go to waste." AJ announced.

"Especially not when it loves your company," Beth added.

"Or if it has a nice accent." Nattie chimed, resting her chin on Shay's head. "Just face it, you have yourself a six-foot, what... six, two-hundred-sixty-seven pound bar of white chocolate that wants you to come _home_ safely tomorrow. I will personally attack you if you let that melt." She ruffled her cousin's hair.

"Melting might be a good thing," AJ wagged her eyebrows and Shay felt her face flush scarlet. Still, Shay couldn't contain her laugh as AJ tried to balance popcorn on her nose. It was funny in the way they said it, in swooning, overly dramatic fashion.

"You guys are great..and kinda terrible," Shay laughed, continuing to wipe a stray tear from her face. "I, uh, really needed that, guys." She laughed again.

"Any time, Hart." Beth shouldered her, and she nudged back trying to pry herself from their arms. "Now go, grab a movie. This chick-flick movie marathon starts now."

"Seriously, though, you two would be damn cute. And you both deserve each other." AJ stated, satisfied and she ignored the slight eye-roll Shay cast her before taking her spot in front of the TV. "Well," she gestured to the spots around her, "let's get to the romantic comedies." Shay sat down beside AJ, who smiled softly. "Sorry if I...uh, crossed a line."

"It's fine," Shay smiled. "Don't worry about it." She had gotten it off her chest, and it was there in the open. She wasn't afraid of him, he was close to her, far too close for her to push him away. Besides, the attempts to keep him out thus far had been unsuccessful. He kept getting through her walls, and gradually, he gave her a glimpse of what was behind his. Around him, she felt truly happy, in all the ways they described in those petty romance movies. Heartbeat quickening, shortness of breath, an incessant smile.

She turned her attention to the movie ahead, and she laughed during one of the humorous parts, and poked fun at the leads. She found she had much more in common with these three than she had thought, that maybe she wasn't entirely different, and that they could get along well. Friends, people who seemed to enjoy her company without making her feel like an oddity, a, dare she say it, crush, and the slightest feeling that she had found a place she truly belonged; Shay smiled, things were finally looking up.


	30. Dance With Me

**Alrighty, guys! It's Moth to a Flame! I only own Shay and anyone you don't recognize and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. Thank you to everyone who is reading and reviewing, I love getting all your feedback. :D And... I have some news for you guys!**

**Moth to a Flame is going to be 50 chapters long! Yes, Yes, Yes! Which means we have a whopping 20 chapters left, and I'm looking forward to seeing you all at the end, even though I'll be sad when this one ends. Which reminds me, there won't be a sequel, I can tell you that because it's about time I gave Shay some peace.**

**Two, I posted a story a little while ago called Say Goodbye, and I'd appreciate it if you guys dropped by there and checked it out. :D**

**Three, this chapter is split into two/three parts because otherwise it would've been really whopping and too much to take in at one time, so... here we go.**

**Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**Otherwise, to infinity and beyond.**

**Love,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Shay groaned as she trudged down the hall, stifling a yawn and dragging her hand through her hair as she reached her destination. Her hand rapped the door, and it opened revealing the slightly smug, slightly smiling face of Stephen. "Well, top of the mornin'."<p>

"Hey," she yawned, trying to stop herself midway through. "I, uh... we had quite the night." She thought of the movie night with the girls and chuckled, shaking her head. "You should see AJ at three in the morning." Shay slid past him, and he stopped her.

"Did yeh get any sleep?"

"Well... maybe three hours of it. Like I said, we had quite the night. Beth and Nat fell asleep at around... midnight, while AJ and I sat up until three." She explained, and he crossed his arms over his chest.

"I should probably get yeh into bed then. It's only seven," He paused, "That first part came out wrong, kind of." Shay laughed, dropping off her bag at the base of the bed before turning back to him. "Have anythin' planned for today?"

"Nope," she sat on the edge of the bed. "The taping tonight, but... I'm free otherwise."

"Take a nap then, I have a few errands to run." Stephen suggested and her eyebrow rose. "And then I'll be back around... 1:30, should everythin' work out." He offered her a smile, reassuring her that everything was alright, and that she could rest. His tone was not one to be argued with, and her yawn agreed that she should probably get the extra couple hours of sleep.

"Yeah, fine. I'll... hold the fort, I guess." She returned the smile and waved as he left. As he went down the hall, he dialed a number and pressed the phone to his ear.

"You flying in for the PPV?" He asked, and the voice on the other end scoffed.

"I was planning on it, why?"

"Yer plane's comin' in today...right?"

"Yes, Stephen." He sighed, halfway to aggravated. "Why?

Stephen huffed, stopping in the middle of the hall. Adam knew exactly why he was calling, and it seemed he just wanted Stephen to say it out loud, purely for the satisfaction of it. He just knew he probably woke Adam up, and the blond had never been a morning person. "Do yeh think yeh could meet me at that Starbucks nearby? 'Round... noon?" He wasn't sure why he was going to Adam, or Jay, for that matter, but he assumed it was because they were her rocks. They had been through everything with her, and he was sure they'd want to make sure she had a safer place to stay. All he wanted was their approval, to give their okay-go, even on something as small as this.

It was a small question compared to others, yet it was more than likely a huge deal for her. But, he figured it was time to tell her what had been on his mind for a while now, because he knew he was too close for her to just push him away. Because now, or soon, was as good a time as any.

An hour long workout and a couple errands later, he was sitting on a stool, glancing between the two men across from him. Jay looked confused, while Adam was smirking. Adam nudged Jay with his elbow. "It's about Shay."

"Oh, is it now?" Jay leaned forward, his interest showing now. "What could he possibly want to ask us about Shay?" Sarcasm, something both were known for. Finishing each others thoughts, also something they were known for. Being protective of Shay, again one of their common traits.

"Could yeh two at least try to act serious?" He frowned, shaking his head. "I just.. you two are her closest friends, an' she loves you. Both of you, I've seen a different side of her around both of yeh, and you've been there for her when everyone else failed. I know yeh want what's best for her. I like her, a lot. An' I want to tell her that. So, can I ask her," he paused, chuckling at himself before continuing, "Can I ask her out? Yeh know... date her?"

Adam looked towards Jay and blinked, "I don't know... can you?"

"Guys," Stephen started, starting to wish that he hadn't decided to ask.

"Fine, we'll be serious. Yes, Stephen. It's fine. Do you always ask for permission to date a girl?" Jay questioned, and Stephen shook his head. "Wow, I'll be honest... it's nice that you asked. With everything she's been through... she needs that. Uh.. chivalry. She needs a guy like you, I approve."

"Ditto," Adam pushed his sunglasses onto his head. He studied the redhead for a moment before smirking again. "Damn, you're really serious."

"I think we could work. I want to be with her." Stephen shrugged. "Why aren't yeh being more...I dunno... apprehensive?" That was the thing he found odd. They seemed so at ease with this, whereas they were hesitant about John, and probably everybody else. What made him so different? Stephen fiddled with the cup holder on the Styrofoam container.

The two blonds looked at each other again before returning their gaze to Stephen. Adam sighed, "Listen, Stephen, we know what she's been through, we got front row seats. We don't want to see it happen again, but we've seen you around her, Jay and Randy were supposed to be looking out for her, and they did, but you did too. But you... seem to make her happy, and we see her. We see somebody we haven't seen in a long time, and that's good enough for us."

"So, when is your whole 'knight in shining armor' ploy going to come in?" Jay asked curiously, his eyebrow raised. Stephen laughed.

"We'll see."

/

_July 15__th__, 2012: Money in the Bank_

"You three aren't being serious," Shay stated, almost glaring at the brunette who was playing with her hair. She pivoted in her seat, glancing between AJ, Beth, and Nattie, all of which shrugged innocently. "That dress is way too short."

"But it's adorable." Nattie assured. "And it's pretty conservative on the top. Plus... you'll match Stephen for when you go down with him later. It's your character, anyway."

Shay sighed, but Nattie was right. On-screen Shay was slightly more provocative, unafraid, powerful and strong, confident. And she needed to portray that, the sexiness with a subtle sweetness, as Adam had said once. She grumbled, plucking the hanger from Nattie's hands before retreating to the bathroom. She chewed the inside of her lip as she gazed down at it... maybe it wasn't too bad.

Replacing her jeans and t-shirt with the dress, she couldn't help but smile. It fit well, baring one shoulder and hugging her features nicely. The top was red and long-sleeved, with a black skirt that cut across mid-thigh. The sleeves were red until her elbows, where it switched to black. Out of all the dressed she had worn over the years, this was probably her favorite. Tugging the hem down as far as she could, she inched her way back into the main part of the locker room. "Well,"

"It'll be perfect for tonight!" Nattie exclaimed, earning a well-raised eyebrow.

"T-tonight?"

"Yeah, we're going out, and you're coming with us." Again, she sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, the whole 'no arguing' tone was coming into play. Even if she said no, her cousin would find a way to get her there.

"Fine," she murmured, knowing all too well that she would end up being the wallflower, and would wind up going back to the hotel far before any of the others even fathomed it. It was her destiny, because she just didn't particularly care for the club scene. Too many people, too many problems. Slipping on her heels, she exited the locker room with AJ following her. Making their way to an open area, she slid onto an equipment box.

"Look who's looking good!" Chris laughed, slinging an arm over her shoulder and giving her a slight hug. Jay and Stephen joined their circle and AJ. "Seriously, look at you. You look different."

Shay shrugged and rested her arms against her thighs. "Do I?"

"Well, you _are_ showing some leg," AJ smirked, patting Shay's knee. "I think you're in love, that _must _be it." AJ looked satisfied, mischievous and Shay's eyebrow rose in warning. "And you were just telling me the other day about a certain so—," AJ was cut off by Shay.

"AJ, are you familiar with the movie Fight Club?"

AJ's eyebrows knit together, "Brad Pitt? Yeah, why?"

"What's the first rule of Fight Club?" Shay held her chin in her hand, casting the brunette a look.

"Don't talk about—oh." She nodded enthusiastically, "I gotcha. So, tonight we were thinking of going out. It's been a while, so... meet us at the club after the show, eh?" AJ nudged Shay. "Even Shay is coming."

"Yeah," Shay grumbled, "I didn't really see the point in arguing. N-Nattie and AJ can be _very_ convincing." Shay's eyes flickered to the clock, before returning to her friends. As her eyes met Stephen's, he smiled, and in return, she did the same.

"Tequila, maybe?" Chris smirked, and Jay leaned forward, clapping his hand on her shoulder.

"Tequila." Jay laughed. "Can I tell the story? What was it... like... ten years ago now?" Jay smirked, tilting his head to the side. "Lace is definitely your thing." He poked her shoulder with another laugh. Shay smacked his arm. "And you have excellent control of your hips." He ducked out of her way to stand beside Stephen, who chuckled and shook his head.

"Exactly...ten years. That's long enough to forget, isn't it?" She asked, chewing the corner of her lip as she slipped off the box and readjusted her dress. "A-And, as I recall," Shay began, tapping her chin, "you're the one who started it."

"Started what?" Stephen asked.

Shay sighed, shrugging. Why not tell the story, seeing as Jay had already begun it? "One night, in 2002, I sort of... went out with Adam, and Jay, and Chris."

"Mistake Number One," Chris chimed in, adjusting his coat.

"And, I sort of had a little too much...," Shay added, while Jay cut in.

"Tequila," Jay wore a grin as he winked at Shay before nudging her with his elbow. "Make a long story short, little Shay here was giving people lap dances." Jay shook his head, amused. "And so, I must be off, I have a ladder match." He gave Shay a quick hug and Stephen a nod. "I'll see you after the show." He tossed his hand up in a wave as he left. Chris and AJ soon followed and Shay chuckled, tousling her hair with one hand while the other rested at her side.

"I told them never to bring it up," Shay sighed, still smiling as she moved to stand beside Stephen. "Well, my run as an exotic dancer was short-lived. And now you know that."

"Nah, you're my escort, remember?" He reminded, winking at her.

"I do, I do," she put a hand to her chest, biting her lip as she walked beside him.

"Do yeh still suck at your job?" Ah, yes... the conversation on the plane and the little running joke between them. Shay shook her head and shrugged.

"You'll never know unless I give you a lap dance," she clicked her tongue, having grown accustomed to this banter. Teasing, a little piece of normalcy, and she felt like she could be herself around him. His eyes sparked and his playful smirk returned, he opened his mouth to speak, but she pressed a finger to his lips. "But that's not at the top of my list of things to do right now."

"Yeah," he murmured, bringing her hand down, "but it's still on the list. Yeh know, you don't _have_ to go out tonight." Stephen shrugged, stating fact, even though she could tell he wanted her there.

"Eh, it might be fun."

He smiled, "We met in a club."

True, she realized. While they knew of each other beforehand, they didn't formally meet until that night in the club. Honestly, it seemed strange because of how they met. Not some random guy dropping hopeless pick-up lines, but a recovering woman tripping over her own two feet and happening to fall within his vicinity. Then, the same guy ends up making the save between her and her ex-boyfriend, driving her to the hotel, and starting a storyline with her.

It was funny how life worked.

"Probably one of my better life choices."

She could feel her slight blush, but ignored it and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. Silence fell for a few moments as they made their way down the hall. Suddenly, he stopped and she turned half-way to catch his gaze.

"I like yeh, Shay."

She smiled softly, nodding once. "I like you too, Stephen."

He smiled, this made him feel more sure of himself, in a way. And, it made him all the more sure that tonight was the night to take that chance.

/

The music was thumping, blasting with great intensity as she slid in, half being dragged by AJ, half being pushed by Nattie. "Guys, I'm coming willingly, no need to shove...or pull."

"Nattie told me you'd need some convincing," AJ defended, tightening her grip on Shay's wrist, skipping slightly as she tossed her hair over her shoulder. "But we're here, so you're not going anywhere." She released her grip.

Shay looked up at the crowd, and the stage at the front of the room. "AJ... what is this?"

"Karaoke."

"Perfect," Shay said sarcastically as she moved forward. Her foot caught the rug and she stumbled forward, clutching onto the nearest object... a forearm. "Uh... hi, Stephen."

"Hullo, long time, no see." His arm slid around her waist and he lifted her back into a standing position before letting her go. She took a step back, surveying the rest of the guys around him; Jay, Chris, Bryan, and Phil, and smiled, pulling each of them into a hug.

"You guys all did great tonight," Shay said as she pulled back from Jay.

"Where's my hug?" Stephen grinned, holding his arms out and securing them around her as she flitted into his arms. He held her there for a few moments, swaying before he released her. "So, are yeh going to be getting up there?" He tossed his head back, nodding towards the stage and she shook her head.

"I, uh... don't know, I might...," Shay shrugged, really not having any intention of going up there. At the same time, she really didn't like the smug smirk that flashed across Jay's face.

/

"Wh-where's Stephen?" Shay questioned, tugging slightly on Jay's elbow. He turned with his eyebrows raised and another smirk.

"No idea, but you're singing tonight." He was serious, and adamant and she sighed, shaking her head. "Why not?"

"I...uh, don't want to embarrass myself." It was a weak argument, she realized.

"Karaoke is all about embarrassing yourself. Nobody cares if you're shitty singer. As for Stephen, he left about... eh, twenty minutes ago. Get up there, we've been here for, like... forty-five minutes and nobody has gotten up there yet." He pouted, seriously pouted and Shay rolled her eyes. "Please?"

"No," she stated."God I wish I had pants," she murmured, wishing AJ and Nattie had let her change first before coming. "I think I'm just going to go back to the hotel..."

"Oh, no yeh don't." She turned, poised to counter his statement, but stopped. He smiled, pushing the folded clothing into her arms and handing over the boots. "I brought yeh something."

"My jeans and my favorite boots," she nodded. "Because you know how much I don't like the short dresses." He sat down at the bar, nodding and murmuring a confirmation. She grinned, fleeing off to the bathroom.

He smiled, tapping his fingers across the counter, hoping that if she was more comfortable, she'd come out of her shell more. Have a little more fun, be a little spontaneous. She looked just as beautiful in jeans and boots as she did in a dress and heels. Then, maybe he'd convince her to go up there and do the whole karaoke thing. She had told him she liked to sing, and he also knew, from talking to Jay, that she wasn't always as shy as she was now.

A pair of arms snaked over his shoulders and a kiss was pressed to his cheek. "Thank you, Stephen. You're the best." He pivoted, smiling.

"Any time, an', I know. Now, go and have some fun. Just go out there and find someone to dance with."

"E-Easier said than done," she muttered, feeling a sharp tug on her arm. AJ grinned, apologizing for stealing her away before dragging the blonde off into the crowd. Stephen chuckled, standing and moving in as well.

As he had hoped, she had come out of her shell, even if it was only slightly. She was getting comfortable with the people around her, swinging her hips with AJ to the beat of the song. Bryan laughed, sliding behind them and catcalling, followed by Jay calling out.

"Told ya you had great control of your hips." Jay patted Shay on the shoulder, and she laughed along. Then, her eyes met his and she moved towards him. Bobbing her head to the music, she approached him and took his hand in hers. Shay smiled, tugging him to her and putting his hand on her hip.

"Dance with me."


	31. Do You Do More Than Dance?

**Here we go with Moth to a Flame! I only own Shay, and whatever lyrics you recognize belong to their respective artists. Artists used in this chapter/mentioned belong to themselves. Therefore, I do not own Foreigner, Bon Jovi, or Katy Perry. I also apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors and this picks up right after Chapter 30 leaves off.**

**I have about a month left before school starts, so let's hope I get this a little further along before September, lol. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, or story alerted, you guys are awesome and I love hearing your feedback. :D It keeps me motivated so keep it coming. :)**

**Please read, review, and enjoy**

**To Infinity and Beyond,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Her smile was small, soft, teasing as she sashayed her hips and trailed her hands up his chest and over his shoulders. She gave his biceps a slight squeeze, rising up on her toes and whispering in his ear. "I'm not very good at this." His grip tightened ever-so-slightly, subconsciously, because he just didn't believe her, because he wanted to secure her and this moment to him. His gaze was on her, on how close her body was to his and how she moved her hand to tug at his tie. He didn't want to blink, and his hands guided her hips with his. Shay let out a soft chuckle and her tongue darted out to moisten her lips.<p>

And his eyes stayed on her, while dozens of bodies writhed and moved around them; she had his attention. All of his attention, and he wondered if she knew that. The question was fleeting, and one of his hands slid up to brush hair from her face. He leaned forward, dipping down slightly to reach her and she could feel his breath against her neck. "You're perfect."

Shay giggled, a slight, careful sound and he barely heard it. Her hand came to his jaw, the other around his neck, pulling her flush against his body. "I don't know about that." Stephen could feel her lips against his jawline, and the smile they curved into, and the heat of the blush on her face. He smiled, taking her hands in his.

"I do," he murmured, but it caught on her ears. They moved together, simultaneous and in sync with the other, completely disregarding the people around them. Their eyes stayed connected with the occasional moments when he could've sworn hers had settled on his lips. In one, fluid movement, he twirled her around and brought her right back into his arms. She was smiling, enjoying herself while letting the music seep into her skin, dancing with a good friend, and dare she admit it, having fun at a club.

The music faded, far too soon for either of their liking, and he slid an arm around her waist, pulling her into a one-armed hug. "Thanks for the dance."

"Well, it was my pleasure." Shay adjusted his shirt, gently smoothing out the wrinkles before stopping abruptly, as if catching herself in the middle of doing something she shouldn't have been. Tucking her hands into her pockets, she nodded towards the stage. "Uh, Jay wants me to go up there."

"Are yeh?" He asked, "It couldn't hurt." Stephen shrugged, dropping his arm to his side.

"I don't know, it's not something I usually do."

He laughed, stroking his chin as he shook his head. "Shay, yeh practically just grinded on me in the middle of a club. Tonight's kinda the night for doin' things yeh don't usually do."

"True, that usually doesn't happen." They moved through the crowd, her hand staying in his so she wouldn't get pulled away by any of their friends on the way to the table.

"I think I'd remember if it did. So... I propose an idea." He spoke, considering the idea again in his head. It sounded good, even though it came at a price that was more or less to his expense. Perhaps not an expense, but it was going to be worth it. Her eyebrows perked up, and she looked back at him, interested.

"Fire away." Shay took a swig of water.

"Well...if yeh go up there and sing, I'll do the same. An' that'll show yeh exactly why I stopped doin' choir." Stephen chuckled, hoping she would catch on and accept. Shay smiled, nodding as she crossed her arms over her chest.

She ran a hand through her hair, "That's smooth. That's probably bribery." Shay paused, thinking to herself. It did sound intriguing though, and she tapped her chin with her finger. "S-So...you'll go up there," she gestured to the platform, "in front of all the co-workers and miscellaneous people?"

"Yep." He nodded curtly.

"Oh yeah, that's right... you're not afraid of anything." She was sarcastic, her voice falling to a mutter as she shook her head.

He shrugged, eyes falling to her face. "Yeh kinda scare me a little." There was a pause, and once he knew she wasn't going to speak, he did. "Somethin' changed in yeh, Shay."

"I'm aware." Shortly after their reconciliation, she had decided enough was enough. Words hurt, that she knew all too well, and Victoria had struck a nerve. She had dug up bones Shay had wanted buried, and it made her think more. Shay just got tired of breakdown after breakdown, of tumultuous emotions getting the better of her. Constant repetition of the same old words transmitted somewhat bitter feelings.

If she wanted to get past this, move forward from the past, she would have to be real about it. Yeah, it hurt, and life sucked for a while. It was pointless dwelling on it. "I didn't _just_ get over it, everything, Stephen. I just... accepted it. Come what may, I'll take it on." Shay cleared her throat, not entirely believing it herself. He shot her a look, and she sighed. "Seriously, Stephen... yeah what Victoria said was hurtful, and it did get to me. Alright. It got to me, and I'm fine."

"Yeh know I'm here for yeh, right?" He put his hand between her shoulder blades. "I shouldn'ta brought it up, Shay."

"You're the one who taught me to let go," Her lips titled up into a smile. "I know, though, Stephen." Shay was about to add something else when a flash of blond hair caught her eye and she covered her mouth with her hand.

Stephen squinted, "Is that...Jay?"

"Mmhmmm," Shay nodded, "And he's singing Foreigner."

"How do you..."

"He _always_ does Foreigner. And, Hot Blooded is his jam," Shay said with finality as Jay took the mic and the music started. "See? Adam, Jay, and I always did this song." Her smile grew as she recollected the memory. Memories of late nights with her closest friends jamming and singing along to the radio between shows, of the times when they were young, and new and learning together. It had always been rough, and it had always been the three of them ever since she met them.

"I thought yeh were shy?" His eyebrows rose curiously and he nudged her with his elbow. "An' yeh used to do karaoke?"

"We only did it twice for karaoke, every other time was blasting it in the car on the way to the next city. Th-The last time I did something like this was in 2004. So, i-if I get up there... you will too?" Another blush had crawled across her cheeks and she looked away from him in attempts to hide it

"Promise, an' I've been pretty good on keepin' my promises so far," he smiled again, one of those infectious little gestures he had and she nodded.

"Alright, then. Deal."

"It has to be a solo," he added, nodding with a smug look on his face "Ya know, so yeh don't hide behind a duet."

"Speaking of duets," AJ laughed light-heartedly, slithering between the blonde and the redhead and tilting her head against Shay's shoulder. The look on her face was obvious, her intentions needing no words. Shay opened her mouth to protest, but AJ shook her head. "Too late, we're already signed up, after Jay does his thing, then Jericho... we're up." AJ shrugged, glancing back at Stephen. "Did I... interrupt something?" Yes, she did and she knew it. Backtracking, AJ slid back into the crowd, going with Celeste.

Stephen chuckled, "AJ...we'll I guess you're going up there regardless."

"Mmhmm," Shay humming along with Jay. Stephen's eyebrow rose as she tapped her thigh with her hand, as if waiting for an opportune moment. Once she caught on with the beat, she smiled. "I'm hot blooded, check it and see. I've got a fever burnin' inside of me. Come on baby, do you do more than dance? I'm hot blooded, I'm hot blooded, I'm hot." Shay knew Jay had heard her, because his grin had widened. He held his hand out to her, she took it and let him pull her onto the stage.

"Now it's up to you," Jay sang, nudging Shay with his hip, "can we make a secret rendezvous?"

"Oh before we do, you'll have to get away from you know who." Shay continued, bobbing to the music and joining him in the next part. "I'm hot blooded, check it and see. I've got a fever of a hundred and three. Come on baby, do you do more than dance?" Jay took her hand and twirled her around. "I'm hot blooded, hot blooded." They continued on, going back and forth until the last line, where they turned to face each other.

"Hot blooded for your sweet, sweet thing!" The music ended and Jay wrapped her in his arms, embracing her in a tight hug, swaying her back and forth. She smiled, grinning with a shrug as she put the microphone aside. "It's our song, Jay."

"Yeah," he smiled, putting a hand on her shoulder, "it's our song." They got off stage and returned to the table, where their friends were sitting, vaguely surprised. Chris was smirking, his arms over his chest as he stood, allowing Shay a seat.

"That was... awesome," Chris threw an arm across her shoulder and she ducked away before he had a chance to ruffle her hair. Gliding into the seat, she rested her hands on her knees. "Now, if you guys don't mind, I'm going to go and show off." Chris laughed, the others chuckling in amusement as he slid through the crowd and towards the stage.

Shay let out a breath, and felt the tension leave her shoulders as a voice fell on her ears. "Yeh did great." He was close to her, leaning in so she could hear him and when she turned her head to face him, they were barely an inch apart. Stephen leaned back slightly, clearing his throat and wetting his lips as he did so. "Uh...yeah, yeh were great. I had no idea."

"Well," she mused, brushing hair from her face, "now you have a vague idea. I, uh, I told you that I used to sing." Shay was about to add something else when a hand found its way to her shoulder. She faced the person, face nearly falling as she took in who it was and she fought back a groan. Pushing a polite smile to her face, she twisted her hands together in her lap. "Cody."

"Shay," Cody gave a curt nod, nodding again to Stephen. "Can we talk?" Why would he want to talk? She had settled this, hadn't she? What part of 'no' didn't quite sink in. Regardless, she stood and followed him into the throng of people, shooting a look at Stephen over her shoulder. He nodded, sitting up straighter in his seat, eyes following her; barely fleeting. Turning back to Cody, she followed him through the people and to a little booth tucked in the corner. "So..."

"So," her eyebrows knitted together, and she gave a sheepish nod as she tapped her fingers across the table. "What do you want?"

"I can't remember the last time a woman turned me down," he murmured, looking down at his hands before his gaze landed on hers.

"And I won't be the last, Cody. I just don't like you... in that way. It's pretty simple." She didn't mean to sound that... harsh, but it was the way it came out and she could feel his gaze harden. Shay stood, her hand resting on his shoulder. "Take it easy, Cody." And then she was off, filing through the crowd and nearly bumping in to a few of the people. Midway through, just as she had caught sight of Stephen, somebody grabbed her by her hips and brought them to theirs. A slight squeal left her lips and she spun to face the person.

An unfamiliar face smirked back and she placed a hand on his chest, trying to shove him away, but he wouldn't budge. "C'mon, darlin', don't you wanna dance with me?" She shook her head, thinking he would accept her declination. Instead, he caught her by the wrist as she tried to turn away, brought her back in to his chest, and copped a feel; his hand dangerously close to her behind. Before she had the chance to slap him, or break free, a strong, muscular forearm shot between them. A hand landed on the man's shoulder and shoving him back a good few inches.

It was Stephen, she could recognize the voice, the scent, the general presence anywhere. His voice lowered, tone menacing and hard as his eyes narrowed. "I think yer done here." It was enough of a warning, the hardened emotion in his eyes as he nodded towards the door, and the fact that he was not someone most willingly jumped into an altercation with.

The man shrugged Stephen's hand off, scowling as he turned away. "Well maybe you should keep a better leash on your bitch, dick." Again, Stephen's hand clapped on the shoulder, spinning him around in a split second, glaring and grabbing the shorter, slighter man by the collar. He paused, and she involuntarily flinched, expecting a punch to be thrown. Rather, Stephen tilted his head to the side, smirking and releasing him.

"Yeh have a nice night, now." While his expression had eased, his tone didn't and it was blatantly clear that 'you have a nice night, now' was the polite equivalent of 'please, get the fuck out'. Stephen turned his back on the other, and followed Shay off to the table again. "He leave?"

"Shortly after we walked away," she confirmed, biting her lip and crossing her arms over her midsection. "But thank you, you seem to have a knack for saving me in clubs and bars."

"Eh, it's no problem, really. Not like yeh can control a bunch of animals," Stephen muttered, shaking his head as he shrugged. His expression had softened greatly, returning back to the gentler, amiable one. He looked like he could tear the head off a man's shoulders, and she had come to realize that he would only start throwing punches when it was absolutely necessary. He blinked in confusion, murmuring along to the song that was playing, the one Chris was currently belting. "Bon Jovi?"

"He is livin' on a prayer. I swear he takes this rock star thing and just runs with it," she twisted around to nod at Chris before returning her stance to Stephen. He moved in closer, one hand adjusting the hat perched on his crown, the other slipping past her waist to land on the table behind her. She inched closer to him, almost instinctively as he ducked down.

"Yeh have beautiful eyes, Shay." He cleared his throat. "I was jus' wondering if...eh," Stephen paused, shrugging slightly as he started to continue.

"Shay!" Stephen's face fell at the interruption, cussing under his breath as AJ swooped in... again. "Jericho's done! Which means you and I have a date...up there," AJ pointed towards the stage. "Are you brushed up on your Katy Perry?"

"AJ, I admire your enthusiasm, but hold on one second." Shay turned back to Stephen, "So... what were you wondering?"

"I, uh," Stephen shook his head, hands resting on his hips. "Forget about it, jus' go up there an' have a blast."

"I'll be back, and you're going to tell me what's on your mind, alright?" Shay smiled, using his collar as leverage to kiss his cheek. "Alright, my knight in shining armor?"

Stephen chuckled, and she could feel the rumble in his chest. "Sure thing, Shay." Stephen sat down beside Jay, who laughed.

"Has AJ been cock-blocking you all night?" Stephen returned with a nervous laugh, shaking his head.

"I just wanna get her alone."

"Well," Jay began, leaning forward slightly as AJ and Shay each took a microphone, "just open your mouth and ask." Jay shrugged, noticing the weary look Stephen shot him. "Just a suggestion." They turned their attention to the girl on stage, Shay nodding towards AJ, signifying the brunette could go first.

"You've got to help me out. It's all a blur last night. We need a taxi, 'cause you're hung over and I'm broke," AJ sang, smiling as she poked Shay in the shoulder and moved her hips to the beat. "I lost my fake I.D., but you lost the motel key." Dragging a hand through her hair, AJ flipped it over her shoulder, and returned her attention to the mic. "Spare me your freaking dirty looks now, don't blame me."

"You wanna cash out," Shay smiled, the lyrics coming to her mind so she didn't really have to pay much attention to the screen, "And get the hell out town. Oh, don't be a baby remember what you told me...," she winked at Jay, inciting his laugh and approving nod. "Shut up and put your money where your mouth is. That's what you get for waking up in Vegas. Get up and shake the glitter of your clothes now. That's what you get for waking up in Vegas." Shay started bopping around, bobbing her head and dancing along as AJ picked up where she left off. She felt a rush, an adrenaline that was only comparable to the way she felt in the ring... to the way she felt around Stephen. Shay smiled, an idea coming to her head as she left the stage, urging AJ to continue. A pep in her step, she approached the table with the guys seated around it, and her eyes met his. Quickly, she removed the hat from his head, ruffled the ginger-hued locks and replaced the cap on her head. Moving back to the stage, she shot a grin over her shoulder at him, one which he returned and she vaguely heard his laugh.

Tonight was going to be a good night.


	32. Silly Little Pick Up Lines

**Hullo dear friends, welcome to Moth to a Flame. I only own Shay. I do not own any songs used in this chapter, and they are property of their respective owners. I am not affiliated with Kelly Clarkson, The Proclaimers, Warrant, etc. They do not belong to me. Is that enough of a disclaimer? Yes, alrighty. Here we go.**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors.**

**Watch me dodge everything Angel is going to throw at me.**

**Thank you for your reviews and feedback, your story-alerts and favorites. You all motivate me to keep writing, so thank you. I love hearing what you guys have to say. XD Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**To infinity and beyond,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>He gazed at her, broad smile never leaving his face. She captivated him, in her own little way. In that soft, little smile lay different sides of her, most of which he hadn't seen yet. He'd seen a slight snippet of her downfall, of the times where she was at her lowest. He had seen her rise from the ashes, smoldering with embers longing to be reignited. But he hadn't seen her soar, not yet anyway. And, from the way she looked swinging her hips as she walked away from him and joined AJ for her next part, he could've sworn he'd seen her take flight.<p>

This was another facet of her, another little aspect of her personality that drew him towards her. When she was upset, when she had no strength left to fight, he wanted to be her rock. When she was scared, he wanted to be the one to chase her fears away, to be the one she held close to her and let inside that wall. She wanted honesty, he would always give it to her, regardless if it was something she wanted to hear or not. Shay made him want to be whatever she needed, whatever she wanted, and that was a feeling he wasn't quite used to.

He wanted this, and she would never have to ask him to do so. Even if she didn't see him in her life romantically, he still wanted to be a part of her life. He would do whatever he could in his power to still be able to see that smile, hear that laugh and be a part of the people she held closest to her. However, if she asked him to leave, he would. Stephen just didn't know what would happen if she didn't want him they way he wanted, or needed, her. Would they fall apart? Because she had a track record of pushing people away once they made her feel unsafe, hurt, or mistrusted. And he didn't want to see her become 'just another coworker' again.

And so he came to realize that Shay may or may not have had an impact on his life. He wasn't sure if it was the seasons, or her that was making him think like this.

He felt her presence next to him, and without looking, he smiled. "Hey, Shay."

"I was actually trying to sneak up on you, Mr. Lost-In-Thought." Shay laughed, shaking her head slightly. "Apparently, I failed."

"I've been around yeh enough to know yeh use enough strawberry hair product to moisturize a sheepdog, Shay." He finally looked at her, and a half-content, half-amused smile tilted his lips. She looked good in his hat. She looked good in his shirt.

"Actually, just shampoo and conditioner," she muttered, absentmindedly twirling a lock around her finger. "I'm actually kinda glad Nattie and AJ convinced me to come. I'm kinda enjoying myself, Stephen." She smiled shyly.

"Yeh seem to be enjoying my hat. Any chance I'll get it back any time soon?"

She seemed to ponder this for a moment before patting his shoulder and shaking her head. "Nope." Shay chuckled, tucking hair behind her ear. "Hey, um, you don't mind if I go and hang with Jay and Chris for a while, do you?"

His eyebrow rose and he shook his head. "You don't need my permission." He was about to add something else, but decided against it. She was probably used to asking first. Shay stood, nodding briefly before stopping and planting her hands on her hips.

"Yeah, but you're sitting here alone." Shay pointed out.

Stephen let out a small laugh. "I'll be alright. As much as I love your company, I'm pretty sure Jay'd like ta see yeh sometime tonigh'. So," he began, patting the side of her thigh, "go. Be free." So, she left and found Jay and Chris talking with Mike.

Before she could introduce herself into the conversation, Mike noticed her and grinned. "Shay, hey. How's it going?"

Mike, one of the friends that almost immediately stopped talking to her after the blowout with John. She tried to believe Stephen's reasoning, that maybe he just didn't know how to handle the situation, but it was tough. He was probably there because John was, and she didn't exactly blame him. She didn't harbor any ill-feelings toward him. It wasn't like he was a part of the problem. Shay murmured a small greeting and waved. There was a brief moment of silence before Mike blurted out.

"So, did you enjoy John's wedding?" His eyes widened as the words left his lips and he glanced away. Jay's and Chris's eyebrows shot up and Shay shrugged.

"I had a lot of fun with my friends." Shay stated, crossing her arms over her chest. "We kind of... took over our little corner of the universe."

"I wouldn't know," Chris said. "I wasn't invited." He sounded nearly amused as he sipped his drink, setting it on the nearby table with a satisfying 'clink'.

"Yeah, I... uh, saw you with Stephen and Nattie...I thought you and Nattie didn't get along."

"Things changed."

Mike gave her a glance, and ran his eyes down her body. "They have. Never thought I'd see you out in a club doing more than being a wallflower."

"I guess I just came out of my shell," Shay replied, tucking her hands into her pockets as she sighed. Mike glanced around, then returned his gaze to her.

"If you had come out of your shell two years ago, I bet you and John would still be together. You know John's here, right?" He stated, and Shay shot him curious look. "Well, maybe not still together, but...the break might've been cleaner. "

"I'm glad John and I broke up, Mike." Shay cut him off. "And shoving it in my face that we did doesn't make me want him. It's been two years, and I've moved on." A voice in the back of her head whispered that he hadn't. That was his problem, not hers. And what was this about him being there? She hadn't seen him, but he probably knew she was here.

"I thought you two would make it."

"At one point, I did too. I guess we were both wrong." She paused, biting the inside of her lip. She moved to stand more towards Jay. Mike nodded once, then shook his head as he brushed past the blonde. Settling into the space Mike vacated, she focused back on the two standing there, giving her curious looks. "And how are you two this fine evening?"

"Uh...your ex is here, and you don't care?" Jay asked and she shrugged, nonchalant and frankly, not caring. "Not particularly. H-He's allowed to be here too."

"Alright," Chris said, "then what's with the angry eyes?" He gestured to her face and she pursed her lips.

"It just bothers me that he hasn't moved on," Shay explained, replacing her hands to her sides.

"He's married, how much father does he have to move...," Chris started, but caught the look on her face. "Oh. Seriously? I don't think he'd do anything drastic."

"I know," Shay replied, eyes falling on the stage. "But I have an idea." And then, as Jay and Chris watched her, she moved across the room and towards the DJ. As a few of the Divas left the stage after a somewhat humorous Pussycat Doll rendition, and Shay took their place, the two blondes exchanged glances.

"This should be interesting."

/

Shay cleared her throat, looking out over the crowd with a slight smile. She saw Stephen, who smirked and shot her a thumbs-up. The nerves prickled down her neck and spine and she could feel the tension lining her shoulders. Trying to settle the slight shaking in her hand, she grabbed the mic. This was different than doing something with Jay, or AJ. She only hoped she could find her groove soon, because sometimes it felt like wrestling and singing were the only times she was truly in that place where nothing mattered and every ounce of fear and misfortune was gone. The song started, and she pushed a smile to her lips.

"You know the bed feels warmer, sleeping here alone. You know I dream in color, and do the things I want," her eyelids fluttered and she caught John's eyes. "You think you've got the best of me. Think you've had the last laugh. Bet you think that everything good is gone." The smile slowly slipped into a smirk and the strings of tension pulling her together loosened. John looked up, eyes locking with hers, and it seemed that he was finally seeing her for the first time. "Think you left me broken down. Think that I'd come running back. Baby, you don't know me, 'cause you're dead wrong."

Her mind registered the whistle. "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stand a little taller. Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone. What doesn't kill you makes a fighter, footsteps even lighter. Doesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone." Shay continued on, hitting the notes on the head, getting into the beat of the song, putting the feeling into the words. Fueling one of her passions, she felt little surges of electricity that could only be rivaled by the thrill of breaking through that curtain and strutting down to the ring.

"You heard that I was starting over with someone new. They told you I was moving on, over you. You didn't think that I'd come back, I'd come back swinging. You tried to break me, but you see." Out of the corner of her eye, she notice Nick's glare, and it only broadened the amusement on her face, only furthered the sense of independence she was feeling. Shay sung the lyrics strongly, through the chorus, and finally the bridge. "Thanks to you I got a new thing started." Subconsciously, she glanced at Stephen. "Thanks to you I'm not the broken-hearted. Thanks to you I'm finally thinking 'bout me." Smirking, she tipped her hat in their general direction, belting out the lines. "You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning. In the end." Shay walked up and down the stage, getting lost in her own world, barely caring what anybody really thought. As she walked past Chris and Jay, she slapped their hands and continued on her merry way.

When she caught John's expression, the stoic, slightly angered expression almost led her to shoot him a sarcastic little wave. Instead, she went back to the song until the finish. "Ooh, I'm not alone." With that, she returned the mic to its stand and hopped off the stage, plopping down in her seat next to Stephen.

"That hat tip was a nice touch," he smirked, chuckling slightly at the blush that crawled along her cheeks. "Yeh were great. Do that more often."

"I'll, uh... think about it," she lifted the hat to run her fingers through her hair and tousle the locks a bit. Stephen stood, and she looked at him, confused. "Wh-where are you going?"

He slipped his blazer off, draping it over the seat as he loosened his tie and rolled up his sleeves. "Keepin' my promise."

/

Shay's eyes widened, half with shock, mostly with amusement as he started moving his hips. "When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be. I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you. When I go out, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you. If I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be. I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you." He chuckled, wetting his lips and clearing his throat as the song continued.

As it went on, she sat there, enjoying every second of it. Even though his serious-level had probably hit an all time low in the past minute or so, he was keeping his promise. If she got up there, he would. And he had. Sticking her index finger and thumb between her lips, she whistled.

"And I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 hundred more, just to be the man who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door." Stephen gestured now, dancing along to the beat. "When I'm working, yes I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who's working hard for you. And when the money comes in for the work I do, I'll pass almost every penny on to you." His eyes fell on hers and he smiled, nodding slightly. She returned the gesture, sinking into the comfort of her seat. Waving slightly, she grinned and wrapped her free arm over her stomach. "When I come home, I know I'm gonna be the man who comes back home to you. And when I grow old, I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who's growing old with you."

She found herself dancing in her seat, swaying and singing along under her breath. This was one of those songs that everybody knew, or the majority of people knew. Tapping her foot to the beat, she was taken by surprise when Jay sat next to her.

"Why hello there," he was smirking, knowing all too well as he nodded towards the stage. "You should've seen John storm out of here in a fit. I found it really amusing."

"When did that happen?" Her eyebrow cocked and Jay gestured towards Stephen.

"Sometime between when you got off the stage and when you started staring at Stepho up there."

Shay swatted his arm, shaking her head with a smile. Jay laughed, one of those 'I knew it' laughs. He put an arm around her chair, reaching over with a grin. Leaning in close to her ear, so she could hear him, he stated, "You deserve to be happy."

"What if I don't deserve him?"

"You could live a thousand lifetimes and not _deserve_ him, Shay. That's what people say. But if you don't deserve him, then what do you deserve? Those assholes? If you think he could make you happy, if this is a shot at being happy with a man, why would you pass it up?"

Shay contemplated this. "I hate when I get in these conversations with you. You're too damn good and have way too many good arguments." She crossed her arms over her chest with a slight huff. "I'm happy already, I mean. My life is going pretty swell."

"Yeah, then he's the bonus. He's like the little toy in the cereal box. The extra scoop of ice cream. Just enjoy it." Jay rested his hand on her shoulder. "You know I love you."

"Yes, I do."

"And you know that I think you deserve the best. Right now, I think he's the best for you. He brings out the best in you, things I haven't seen in years. Just my opinion." Jay held his hands up as he stood, shaking Stephen's hand as the Irishman approached. "Nice choice. So, what she'd have to do to get you up there?"

"Same," Stephen smiled, nodding. "Pretty much just get up there herself," Stephen chuckled.

"Bribery," Jay clicked his tongue. "Wish I had thought of that before. Now, I'd hate to cut this short, but Jericho and I have to get our grooves on. So, stay safe." He patted both of their shoulders, eliciting a laugh out of both of them as he disappeared. A few moments later, the familiar hum of a song started to play.

"Oh, she's my cherry pie," Jericho began and Shay shot Stephen a look.

"Oh, my... Warrant," Shay mused, biting her lip slightly as Stephen slung his blazer over his arm.

"Yeh stayin' in a separate room tonight?" Stephen asked and she nodded, noting how he had suggested it, much to her confusion. Eventually, they had agreed on it. "But, I see what yeh mean. Chris an' Jay jus' rocking to Warrant. Kind of a sight."

"No, a sight is watching you sing The Proclaimers."

"A sight for sore eyes is yeh singing Kelly Clarkson," he countered, eyes twinkling in the harsh light and she could feel the slight blush staining her cheeks.

"I have no idea how to respond to that," she murmured, putting her hands in her pockets.

"It's getting' kinda late," Stephen began, his statement only confirmed by her yawn. He asked for a walk, to take her back to the hotel and she complied. "Um, shouldn't I tell AJ that I'm leaving with you? I don't want her to get worried."

"Already done," Stephen shot her that smile she could hardly resist, the one that made her feel a hundred different things she hadn't felt in a while. And, as they headed towards the door, her mind flickered back to what Jay said.

_You deserve happiness._

/

She walked out into the brisk, open night and he followed, keeping just a few paces between them. He stopped, and a few moments later, when she realized she only heard her footsteps, she turned with a curious look washing over her face. "Is there something wrong, Stephen?" Shay asked, offering a slight smile as she tilted her head to the side. His hat was still perched on her head, and he shook his head. Nothing was wrong, but, as he gave her a slow once-over, he pulled the calm and nonchalant exterior back on.

"Nothin's wrong." Stephen shrugged, nudging a small pile of dirt with the toe of his shoe. Smiling, so she'd believe him, he almost backed out of it. Almost walked forward, almost threw an arm over her shoulder and almost led her back to the car to make a safe return to the hotel; safe, without any risks being taken or friendships put in jeopardy. Almost. Instead, he cleared his throat and chuckled at her expression. Sweeping his arms out to the side, his eyebrow rose. "Yeh don't believe me?"

"It's not that I don't believe you, Stephen," she paused, taking a few steps forward until she was just an arm's length away. "It's that people don't usually just stop in the middle of a parking lot because nothing's wrong. So, what's on your mind?"

"I've been thinking lately, about things that have happened lately. Maybe even things that happened a while ago." Stephen sighed, figuring this was the best way to go, saying what came to his mind. "For a while now, I've been weighing the options, and thinking. I'm not going to waste your time with silly little pick-up lines, but I like yeh, Shay."

"I know, unless you just hang around me for kicks." Her shoulders shrugged slightly. He didn't need silly little pick-up lines.

Stephen's lips tilted up in a slight smile, somehow catching on that she was more than likely stalling. "I like you as much more than just a friend. And I know how I feel about yeh. What I don't know is how yeh feel about me."

"I do like you, Stephen. But," she trailed off and he winced. There was a _but_. He had expected it, but had some shred of hope that it wouldn't be there. But he knew her by now, at least enough to know that she wouldn't just jump into a relationship with him. Not blindly. Was it really jumping though when they had been friends first? When they had built a steady trust in the other?

"But," he repeated, biting back the heavy sigh that threatened to pass his lips. He was prepared for the, 'but not like that'. Or the 'not ready for a relationship'.

She looked up at him, her mind deep in thought. Her brain weighed the options, the pros and the cons of taking this step. The pros outweighed the cons. When she looked at him, she saw something new on the horizon, something meaningful. It was a risk because one took risks every day, and destiny was primarily composed of decisions. She could either stay afraid and let this chance pass her by. She could shove him away and uproot any emotions she had locked away for him. Or, she could do what would make her happy and say yes. There wasn't an easy line or story out of this, and his eyes searched hers. Biting her lip, she took in a breath and went with honesty. "I can't really think of a 'but' right now."

His smile almost broadened, but he wet his lips and shifted his weight. "That seems like a good thing." Stephen murmured, trying to figure out a way to save this conversation. Then, he caught the look in her eye. "You're afraid, though."

"Not of you. I-I'm not afraid of you, Stephen. I'm afraid that a relationship would just _kill_ our friendship, and you're so close to me, Stephen. I don't want to lose you because of my terrible track record. I-I'm just afraid it'll fail, and I'll end up pushing you away. And I feel like I should be saying I'd rather have you as a friend, than nothing at all." She huffed slightly, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. It fell forward again, and before she had a chance to, he was already tucking it behind her ear. His hand rested on her cheek.

"Yeh won't lose me, Shay. I'll only leave if yeh ask me to. I'll get lost if yeh want me to. You don't want me to be a regret, and you're sure as hell not going to be a regret for me. All those people in the past are there for a reason. You've been broken, shattered and mistreated," Stephen took in a breath, lowering his hand to his side, but keeping his eyes locked with hers.

"And it hasn't exactly been a picnic for you, either." Shay added and he nodded. "You really believe that two bad relationships could make a right one?"

He shrugged, even though he was almost certain it was more than possible. "It's worth a shot, don't yeh think?" Shay sucked in a breath and nodded. It felt right, it sounded right in her head and it was what she wanted. He had been there, solid and unmoving from her life for almost a year. This wasn't rapid, not necessarily. He had already admitted to wanting to be with her, and that somehow eased the fear in her mind. Stephen leaned forward, gently resting his forehead against hers. "I'll show yeh that we won't regret each other, that this... that we have a shot. I know what they did to yeh, Shay." His tone had softened and she her breath fluttered out. It was all so convincing, that this... that he was the right choice. She couldn't imagine her life without him in it, and she wanted him. She wanted him in her life. This was a risk she was going to take. "I know yeh've heard all the lines. Yeh've heard them so many times they've lost meaning. An' yeh don't want to hear that I'm not like the rest, yeh don't want to hear that I won't hurt yeh, because every time someone promised yeh that, they lied. So, I'm just asking yeh to give me a shot. I'm asking yeh to let me prove it to you."

He took in a breath and moistened his lips as he continued. "Will yeh give me that shot, Shay?"

Shay leaned up on her toes to brush her lips against his cheek. She was ready for this

"Yes."


	33. Just a Kiss

**I know, I know...it's been forever and I apologize. No excuse for it, aside from school started and I have things going on. So, I only own Shay, and I apologize for any grammatical/spelling errors. Please read, review, and enjoy, and thank you for sticking through this with me. :D  
><strong>  
><strong>To Infinity and beyond,<strong>

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Shay Hart was feeling light and fluttery as she held the arena door open for AJ. The brunette was grinning, nudging Shay in the stomach with her elbow as she flitted past. "It's not nothing, you're on your feet again."<p>

"Eh," she shrugged, smiling as she nodded. She had noticed little things that had fallen into place in the last week. Little things could make big differences, and that's why she couldn't completely silence the sliver of doubt in her head. The tiny piece that screamed things would go wrong, that the moment she let herself become sure, things would fall. Because that's what always happened. She'd let herself fall too quickly and she'd become trapped. She'd believe their words, believe that they wouldn't be like the previous, and she had been wrong to put such blind faith in any of them. Nick, Dave, John... all left their marks on her, and those marks would carry on with her until she died.

So when would the poison inside her start affecting Stephen?

"I feel like I'm learning from you, and I know I'm just the conditioning tool to get you back into kick-ass." AJ shrugged, and Shay bit her lip, crossing her arms over her chest. "We've been doing this for about... a month now? Mid-June was when we started? And I remember watching you in the ring before you started with Nick, and you were right up there with Lita, and Trish, but they never gave you the belt."

"You're my friend, AJ. I trust you, alright? And, you're getting more air time than any of the Divas." Shay reminded, pulling her hair into a messy bun at the top of her head.

"So, did you and Stephen get into another fight?" AJ asked, tilting her head to the side as Shay's eyebrow rose. "I mean," the brunette sputtered, thinking of how to say it, "you're rooming by yourself and you usually go with him. I don't know if you two got into a spat or not, 'cause, he seems to be happy, and you seem to be alright."

Shay smiled, shaking her head. "No, AJ, Stephen and I didn't get into another fight." Not that she would call their last bout of not being roomies a fight, they still hadn't. No, it was Stephen's request that they roomed separately for a while, and she had complied having seen his point. Another small smile tilted her lips, and she followed AJ through the arena. She and Stephen hadn't really told anybody yet, going more towards waiting for people to figure it out. That, and it had only been three days, she didn't want to cause a fuss over something that had happened only three days ago.

"I see," AJ bit her lip, as if in thought, before releasing in and dropping the subject. "Your getting your edge in the ring back. You're enjoying it more. You'll be back on top in no time."

"If Vince lets me have air time," Shay muttered. She remembered the story line Vince introduced, the heel turn, the fact that her and Stephen's angle was coming to a close, and she had yet to really tell him. It would feel odd, she hadn't been a heel in forever, and it would feel odd not trailing Stephen to the ring. Regardless, it was something new and fresh, and she was excited for it. "Nothing is set in stone just yet, he's waiting to see if I'm better by the end of August. He hardly uses the Divas he has."

"Then impress him," AJ stated, the obvious tone in her voice leading Shay to nod. Impressing Vince had never been easy, though. "What, you were known for counters, and for-,"

"Being a Hart," Shay finished with a chuckle. She looked at AJ out of the corner of her eye, biting her lip. "Hey, AJ?"

"Yeah?"

"Steph—," her sentence ended in an _oomph_ as they turned the corner and she ran into none other than Stephen. He smiled, seemingly ignoring the fact that half the water he was drinking sloshed onto him. Literally, she came face to face with his torso and Shay braced herself against the wall just in time. "en." Shay finished, smiling slightly as she brushed a few stray strands of hair from her face. "As I was saying, AJ. Stephen...,"

"Stephen asked Shay to give him a chance." Stephen stated, taking his hand in hers and intertwining their fingers.

"And Shay said yes," Shay added, nodding affirmatively as AJ's head bobbed up and down in a slow nod.  
>"Oh," she said, biting her lip with a chuckle. "Didn't see that one coming." AJ broke into a grin, finishing off the sarcasm as she shifted from foot to foot. "I know what you two are going to say. So, I'm just going to go that way and say that I'll see you all later." She dismissed herself, skipping along in the opposite direction. Stephen chuckled, moving his arm to wrap around her waist. He drew her in close and Shay rested her palms against his chest.<br>"I think she took it well. She didn't jump us," the corner of his mouth tilted up in a smile and Stephen pressed a kiss against Shay's forehead.  
>"She knew," Shay began, adjusting his collar slightly, "that we wanted to, uh, take things slowly. She's excited, trust me, she's excited." She bit her lip, falling into a thought and he seemed to have picked up on it. One hand went to her hip while the other one tilted her jaw so she would face him.<p>

"How do yeh wanna tell people, lo—Shay?" He asked, an eyebrow hiked up as he surveyed her reaction to his almost-blunder. He didn't know how she would take being called endearments, regardless of how easily they flowed off his tongue.  
>"Let them figure it out on their own." She offered, coming to realize that the best way to tell people was by not telling them. Sooner or later, people would start to notice. "You're not on for the thousandth episode of RAW." She laced her fingers through his as they continued down the hall.<p>

"Changin' the subject, yeah?" He chuckled dryly, his hand moving to run over his mustache and beard before dropping again, and she's only slightly worried. Because he already knows her more than she had originally anticipated, because this relationship was going to be completely different than any of the other ones she had had because he didn't change. No, he had gotten her to say yes, and he still treated her in the same, respectful and gentlemanly way he typically did and she knew part of that had to come from respect.

"I want this to work, Shay. An' that's why I want to go slow, ease into this because while we've known each other for a long time, there's a lot we don't know about each other. People go fast, Shay, an' they miss things that they would've been able to savor had they stopped for a moment. They get so caught up with everything that they forget what's really there." She nodded as he spoke, understanding exactly what he meant and wanting it for a few different reasons. Because she didn't want to lose him, and savoring each moment of life was something she had learned when she was just a tickle away from dying.

"B-but, if you wait too long, think too hard and hesitate...you're just as passive." Her free hand was fiddling with the hem of her shirt. He nodded once, eyes flashing with a mysterious expression she couldn't quite place.

Stephen gave a laugh, dragging a hand through his hair. "I'm kinda doin' things a little backwards. I shoulda taken yeh on a date first. A few dates, actually. Which brings me to this; what are yeh doing Saturday night?"

Shay drew her lip between her teeth. "I guess I'm doing whatever you're doing." She took a slight breath, figuring that now would be the best time to tell him.

"I know the angle's endin', Shay. Jay told me. Kinda funny when yeh think about it. On-screen Sheamus an' Shay are ending, off-screen an' they're just starting. Anythin' else yeh wanted to tell me? AJ says you're doing great in the ring."

Shay chewed on her lip and huffed. "Is there anything my friends haven't told you?" She shook her head with a slight laugh. Stephen smirked. "If I can impress Vince, I'll be coming in to a heel storyline." Shay sighed, trying to ignore that strange feeling that was budding in her chest. "But, uh...I'm not sure how it'll turn out. It's a lot, of, uh, being out there and actually having a feud." Shay glanced up at him out of the corner of her eye, considering that Jay was right.

That she deserved happiness, and that Stephen was someone she could see herself happy with. Because she had grown to want him around, to want to compliment the person he was because he was truly one of the most beautiful people she had ever met. They continued down the hall, partially in silence with idle chitchat filling the spaces. It was easy, smooth and natural. She had almost expected a huge change, but things felt only slightly different. As they passed a few backstage workers, she smiled and nodded and they slowly waved back.

She wanted people figure it out on their own, because two people showing a remarkable amount of affection was a giveaway. While that was only slightly keeping it a secret from everyone else, it was the easiest way for letting people know. Besides, it wasn't their business, and they would find out however they did. Shay didn't really care. Stephen gave her hand a slight squeeze.

"So, on Saturday, dress comfortably. Because I have a plan." He stated, matter-of-factly with a proud smile and her eyebrow rose.

"Oh really? Fine wine and dining never worked on me, Stephen." Shay said, joking and poking him in the shoulder.

"It's a good thing I'm not gonna wine an' dine yeh." He kissed her cheek and she pivoted herself to face him.

"You can kiss me, you know that, right Stephen?" She asked, voice slightly lowered as she offered a small smile, shrugging at his nod. Shay stood on her tiptoes to drape her arms over his shoulders. His arms went around her waist. And she had to catch her breath for a moment, the cool rush of his skin against hers as his arms accidentally pushed the hem of her shirt up. Safe, warm, and strong. Her breath caught in her throat.

She could get used to this.

His lips twitched into a crooked grin, "Yeh'll find I'm a little old-fashioned. An' we won't go public until yeh feel it's right. When it's the right time... when yeh feel sure of me." Stephen murmured. "And I'm supposed ta make yeh believe in fairytales again, yeah?" Shay nodded, entirely unsure of what to say and how to formulate her words. He remembered, all that time ago, when they spoke of fairy tales, and of princes and princesses. When she told him flat-out that her reign as a 'princess' would never come to be, and when he told her he'd be a prince before he'd be a superhero. He had promised her he wouldn't be a hero, because all of her heroes had scarred her. Nick, Dave, John... all promising to save her...all failing miserably.

But weren't princes the hero of the fairytale? She blinked twice to clear her head before focusing back on him. "Fairytales, yeah. And I trust you, so...,"

He chuckled, taking her hands in his and meeting her eyes. "Everythin' will be fine, I promise." And she smiled, choosing to believe him.

* * *

><p>A groan slipped from her lips as she peeled off her shirt and cast it into the pile beside Jay. Jay chuckled, amused from the little show she was putting on, and leaned back onto the bed. Shay returned from the bathroom, arms crossed over her chest. Absently, she started to pick at the hemline of her camisole, then raised her eyes to meet Jay's, shooting him an expectant look.<p>

"What?" He chuckled again, shaking his head. "You look fine."

She nodded once, murmuring an unconvinced 'mmhmm', before she knelt down next to her suitcase and began to rifle through it. "I'm just going to say that wearing Adam's Sex and Violence shirt won't pan out nicely?"

"You still have one?"

"Jay, I have at least one of every t-shirt you guys have come out with. Free merch, Jay, that's the only reason I befriended you." Shay peeked up, sent him a smirk, and returned to her rifling. He gave a fake laugh, rolled his eyes and coughed. After a few moments, Jay spoke up.  
>"I'd wear that flannel," he hoisted himself up onto his forearm and pointed into her suitcase, "with your camisole and jeans." Jay relaxed, whistling under his breath as she slid on the flannel he had instructed. "It's your favorite."<p>

"It is," she murmured and grabbed her boots from their place by the bed. "I'm... not as nervous as I thought I would be."

"I can tell," he sat up, patting her knee. "You're quiet when you're nervous. You've been talking my ear off all day." She laughed along with him.

"If I wore a Scot-Plaid earflap hat, would that be too stereotypical?" She asked, smiling as she brushed her hair over her shoulder. "Eh?"

"Only if he gives you whiskey." Jay clapped a hand on her shoulder as they stood. Someone knocked on the door and Jay's expression faded to one of vague surprise. "He's early." He opened the door as he put a hand on Shay's forearm. Stephen smiled back, nodding once. "Early, eh?"  
>"Roomin' right across the hall, Jay." Stephen informed.<p>

"Are you always a smartass?"

"Do yeh always camp out in Shay's room?" Stephen smirked as Shay looked between them. "Just thought I'd show up a bit early to kidnap your friend here." He chuckled, and it faded as Jay looked him over again. "Eh, tough crowd." Shay flitted to his side, hooking her arm with his. "Hey, beautiful." He ducked down and kissed her cheek before returning to Jay. "I'll bring her back safely, don' worry, Jay."

Jay tilted his head to the side with a small smile. "Just have fun. I'm not her father, Stepho." Jay clapped a hand on Stephen's shoulder. "I'm also not seventeen. We're adults, do whatever you want." Jay slung his jacket over his arm as he shimmied past the two. "I'll see the both of you tomorrow."

"Jay, thank you." Stephen stated and Jay nodded, knowing exactly what he was referring to.

* * *

><p>Her smile broadened as he opened the door for her and walked with her down the sidewalk. He had taken her out to an intimate little restaurant, and had promised more was in store afterward. The duo walked in sync, enjoying the comfort of the sky overhead and the pinpricks of stars in the night. "You've never had poutine...Stephen, I'm disappointed." Shay joked, chuckling.<p>

"I've never had the opportunity."

"The next time we're in Canada, we're getting some good poutine from a vendor. I could probably eat it until I got sick, it's just that good." He took her hand as she spoke, smiling. "Gravy, really thick gravy..." Shay made a small sound and released a breath. "Sorry."

"Nah, don't be. I'll try it sometime. Tha' and snowshoeing." They continued on, talking about books and movies, music and easy-going topics. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched him. She had been feeling things lately that she hadn't felt in a while, things that were missing before. Strength, the companionship of someone she felt safe with, an attraction that wouldn't go away. It was like a moth, intrigued by a little flame and feeling the need to be closer to the flame; to feel the flame's warmth and security. Shay followed as Stephen led her to the park across the street, moving quickly towards the trail that wound through it. "I thought a walk in the park would be a good way to end the night."

"So, is that how you swoon all the ladies, Mr. Farrelly? A quaint meal and a trip to their favorite place?"

"Well, don't yeh just have me all figured out." He nudged her playfully and shook his head. "Nah, though. I usually just go with the flow and see where it goes. With yeh though, I knew what I wanted to do." Stephen explained. He was charming, one of the most physically attractive people she knew, and he was more than just that. She shivered as a breeze rustled past, and before she knew it, his jacket was draped over her shoulders.

"You're the kind of guy girls dream about, you know." Shay informed. "Respectful, passionate, you listen...added to that your body and face are extremely attractive...pretty much the perfect gentleman." Stephen laughed, shrugging as he put an arm around the blonde. It was the truth. Just walking through the park, enjoying the night and each other's company was more than enough. She didn't know how he knew this would be perfect, or if he even knew, but it felt like it was. It was simplicity, and a bit unique. A night under the stars... she couldn't think of any other way she'd rather spend it. Her one hand held the jacket shut, the other found his and they walked back to the hotel. It was getting late, and he had an early event the next day.

A short while later, he stood in font of her hotel room door. "Thank you, for accompanying me tonigh'."

"Thank you for a perfect night," she replied, breath hitching in her throat as he leaned in to kiss her cheek. She wanted to kiss him, but something held her back.

"My pleasure," Stephen grinned, pulling her into a hug and releasing her. "Goodnight, Shay."

"Goodnight," she murmured, her hand on the door handle. Shay was halfway into her room when she stopped. Something felt like it was missing, like she had forgotten something, and she couldn't shake it. On a perfect night, what could've been missing? Shay looked out into the hallway again, and saw Stephen approaching his own room. Pursing her lips, she thought for a moment, and then began walking towards him. "Stephen!"

He paused, the door already open, and pivoted to face her. "Yeah?"

"I, uh...," she dragged her hand through her hair before shrugging out of the jacket. "You forgot your jacket." Shay offered it to him and he took it, a brief flash of disappointment in his eyes. Quickly, he smiled.

"Thanks. So, uh...goodnight again."

"Goodnight again," she agreed, the corners of her lips tilting up into a slight smile. Shay waved slightly. "Just...um, one more thing..."

He met her halfway, tilting her jaw with his hand as the other slipped around her middle. Their lips met in a sweet passion, and skin tingled. It was a cliché, but she didn't care. Her mind drifted away from what could go wrong, and started to focus on the here and now. The here and now, was Stephen. It was a moment from a fairy tale, a lyric from a love song . She could feel his smile against her own as they eventually broke apart, and he kissed her forehead. "Alrigh'...kinda been wantin' to do that all night."

She pecked his lips once more. "Goodnight, Stephen."

"Goodnight, Shay!" Shay's eyebrow rose as she pivoted to face the direction of the voice. Stephen's roommate, sitting on the beds, with a triumphant smirk on his face. Shay waved slightly, her cheeks flushing pink.

"Goodnight, Drew." Stephen stepped to the side and shut the door. Facing her, he apologized. "For the...what, fifth time tonight; goodnight. I'll see you tomorrow." She shoved her hands into her pockets, trying to calm the giddiness that was still tingling her skin.

Stephen nodded. "Goodnight, love."

And it was a good night indeed.


	34. A Reunion, A Lunch Date, A Forboding

**Oh my god, it has been so long since I updated and I apologize. So many things started to pile up, plus a lack of motivation just prolonged this. :/ I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors.**

**I also apologize if things seem a bit bland, things are building up, trust me, lol. :D**

**Please read, review, and enjoy.**

**And a big thank you to everyone who reads and reviews, and who has stuck with me through this story. You're all amazing, and I love you all. Thank you for your continued support. :)**

**To Infinity and Beyond,**

**Kiwi**

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><p>"Dad!" Stephen rolled back on his feet with a smile on his face as Shay bolted forward and wrapped her arms around the neck of the man standing a few feet away. Bret Hart chuckled and returned the gesture. "It's great to see you," Shay murmured, brushing off his shoulders as she took a step back. She ran her hand through her hair and tucked a stray lock behind her ear. "H-How's everything?" Hands tucked into her pockets, Shay smiled slightly.<p>

"Everything's great, Shay. How's my baby girl?"

Stephen watched, carefully, paying attention to the little spark that struck her eye, as if the small term of endearment was a surprise. Perhaps more caught off guard, like something she didn't hear very often. She still smiled though and he took a step back, giving her a curt nod that she mirrored. He knew only a smidge of the things that happened between them, and frankly he felt that standing there would be awkward.

Shay turned to her father as Stephen walked away. "I'm guessing you heard that Nattie and I made up?"

Bret nodded, eyes only flickering back to her. "I'm glad, really. You two haven't gotten along since...uh," he paused, fiddling for the right words, "Since a while." He decided, shoulders gently sagging with a shrug. "So, things going okay?"

"Yeah...," Shay trailed off, eyebrow raised, "Why do you ask?"

"No reason, how's Stephen?"

"He's good." She nudged the floor with her shoe and Bret laughed.

"Is that your way of telling me you're seeing him?"

Shay shrugged, a crooked smile tilting her lips as she nodded. "Yeah, pretty much." Shay shifted her weight from foot to fit, trying to relax her shoulders. She could almost see what he was thinking, knowing it was probably the same as every worry Jay and Adam were trying to suppress; if she was sure this was a good idea. They weren't afraid of him hurting her, at least she was sure they weren't, but she could understand it. They had almost lost her, numerously, and each new romance seemed to come with a larger injury. She waited for her father to say something, anything, really, as long as it filled the silence. Even the rocky bit of their relationship would suffice.

They had talked about it, about why it happened and the reason they pushed each other away. They had also gotten past it, and had rebuilt the fragments of their relationship into a shaky, yet stable, bridge. So now, what used to be delicate, uneasy, and awkward conversations with her father became less awkward and less cold.

"Well, he's a good guy. I'll be looking forward to seeing him in November." This caught her attention. Her eyebrow rose, her arms crossed over her chest, and her back straightened.

"November?"

"Yeah, we're all getting together for Thanksgiving dinner. That includes you, and that includes Stephen ." Bret smiled, putting a hand on Shay's shoulder. "If you want to, I mean...you haven't really come to the holiday get-togethers, and I understand why. Things were tense, and I want you there, Shay. Shay?" He spoke again after she hadn't answered. The elder Hart's eyebrow rose as she slowly nodded. A small smile etched onto her face as she finalized her answer as a firm, 'sure'. Bret's expressed mirrored hers, and he promised he'd call.

They departed, and the first thing she did was tail Jay down. "Thanksgiving dinner... with all of us under one roof."

"And that's a problem...how?" He asked, eyebrows lifting at her half-worried half-content expression. "Aside from the fact you won't have an opportunity to mutilate some poor fowl, I don't see any issues. Potential _or_ inevitable."

Shay shrugged, rolling her shoulders back with a small sigh. "What if it's as awkward as they used to be? I haven't actually _been_ to a family holiday for years. Nick and Dave never let me go, and by the time I was single, or with John, they didn't contact me. One year, when I did go, Dad and I got into a fight."

"Well, are you going? Stupid question." Jay's gaze flickered from hers. "I can tell you're going to go. Now, don't you have a segment to do?" Jay stopped, and leaned against an equipment box. He dug through his duffel for a bottle of water. Shay nodded, and Jay continued. "Go. Run and be free. Oh, and revel in this, alright?" Shay repeated her nod, giving him a quick hug before making her way down the hall. Greeting a shocked backstage worker with a strong 'hello', she was a few feet away when Jay called out,"Don't start asking when things are going to go wrong!"

She threw up a hand to acknowledge him. "I won't, Jay."

And truly, she wouldn't.

**-On-screen- **

** Shay sat on a box, chatting amiably with Natalya, catching up on recent events. "I know, that match was fantastic. Ziggler and Del Rio? Versus Rey and Sheamus?" Natalya laughed. "Not going to happen. Both of them got what was coming to them."**

** "I know," Shay chuckled, shrugging slightly. "Nothing was more entertaining than that 619 and the Brogue Kick." She dragged a hand through her hair, eyebrow piquing as Nattie's eyebrows scrunched together. The question formed on her lips, but her attention drew elsewhere as a light tapping struck her shoulder. Pivoting her body, an exasperated sigh passed her lips and her arms crossed over her chest. "Del Rio. Ricardo," she nodded once to each of them.**

** "Hart. Neidhart," Alberto gave the same greeting, sneering into her face. "Your little Sheamus got of easy last time."**

** "Right. That's why he's still Champion, and you're still begging for title opportunities." Shay smirked, and behind her, Nattie snickered, covering it with her hand. "So, what do you need, Alberto?" The blonde slid from the box and stood in front of him. "Clearly, Sheamus isn't here tonight. Clearly, I'm surprised _you_ showed up." Shay reached up, tilting his chin to the side. "Hmm," Shay murmured.**

** "What?" Alberto snapped, glaring, but waiting. **

** "You'd think there'd be a boot print, or something," she laughed, retracting her hand before he had the chance to slap it away. Alberto squared his shoulders, set his jaw, and glared. Spinning, he barked orders to Ricardo, who stood off to the side. Beside her, Nattie tugged on her sleeve.**

** "I think we should go, Shay."**

** "No, I think Alberto should go." Shay stated, adamant. Faintly, she could hear the crowd chuckling, she could sense Nattie's vaguely amused expression. Still, despite Shay's wanting to stay, Nattie left. "He's the one causing the problem."**

** "Well, I think you should go back to Canada, but that's not happenin', is it, Sweetheart?" Alberto spat, muttering in Spanish. **

** "Oh, we're doing Canada jokes now?" Shay asked, sarcastic. She cornered Alberto and reached up. Straightening his tie, she stopped, glanced up at him, and patted his cheek. "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of a 619 _and_ a Brogue Kick to your face." **

** Shay retracted, and Alberto returned with a jab. "You think you can do anythin' you want. You could, though, if yeh chose me. Leave Sheamus behind, he's turning yeh into a classless excuse for a woman." Alberto laughed, shrugging. "Not that that's very difficult." There was a pause, a moment of silence where Shay shook her head and sighed.**

** "Come back with some better comebacks."**

** "You think you're cute, don't yeh?" Alberto accused, bitterness soaking his tone and she crossed her arms over her chest.**

** "I think I'm adorable." With that, she dismissed him, flitting around the corner. She left him there, scowling and in the moment before the cameras spun off, he barked another order at Ricardo.**

**-Off-screen-**

"Your character's an asshole," Shay muttered, coming back around the corner with her arms still across her chest. A small smile tilted her lips and she playfully elbowed Alberto. He shrugged, extending an arm around her shoulders.

"I didn't choose the heel life, Shay. The heel life chose me," he informed, chuckling as he released her. Patting her shoulder, he nodded. "Adorable, eh?"

"I didn't choose the face life, Alberto. The face life chose me," Shay returned, a slight laugh following as she started down the hall. "I have something to attend to, so I'll have to catch you later, Alberto."

"Hmm, is this something about, eh... yey high," Alberto held his hand flat and extended at about eye-level. "Spiky red hair, kinda Irish? _Oh_," he feigned surprise, "you have a date with Stephen."

She tucked hair behind her ear. "You could say that," Shay tilted her head towards him in a small nod. "Goodnight, Alberto," she shifted from foot to foot as the man walked away, giving her the same farewell as he went. She ducked around the corner, trying to remember where Stephen had asked her to meet him, and deciding that the best course of action was in catering. One, it had food and two: it was the easiest-to-find location in all of the arena.

Catering was practically empty. She found an open table and was on her way to it when she bumped into somebody. Twirling around, an apology painted on her lips, she was stunned to see Victoria glaring at her. "V-Victoria?" She stuttered, arms crossing over her chest, a slight scoff rising from her chest. "C-can I help you?" Shay tried to clear her throat, and looked around for someone who would have her back in the situation. She saw Jay, but he would wait until it was necessary. People were dotted around, as if waiting for something to happen.

It was then she realized that most of the people there were looking at them, for it was no secret that they didn't get along. Word of their previous encounter must've caught wind, because a few of the Divas sat there with smirks on their faces. Gingerly, her fingers found her scar and she heaved a breath. Silence dappled the air, that is, until Victoria shook her head.

"Unless you're resigning, then no," the younger woman looked at Shay with slight disdain, as if studying and scrutinizing her features. "Unless, of course, you need some advice. Your wardrobe could use some work."

"So could your attitude, but you don't hear me complaining," she murmured, chuckling at her own little remark before lifting her eyes to meet Victoria's, who was still making snide comments about pretty much everything.

The way she dressed, the way she spoke, the slight stutter that seemed to linger, Stephen, Jay, being petty—all things she had heard way too often. Shay set her jaw, a smile creeping along her face as her chuckle shook her shoulders.

"You're just so passive, like, you never stand up for yourself, and... it's like you don't even know how to fight anymore. I mean, you'd think you would've learned by know that this isn't your place..."

"Fuck you, Victoria," Shay shook her head with a smile and the redhead paused. Total shock flashed over Victoria's face, as it did over several people surrounding her.

"What did you sa—,"

"I said _fuck you_. I know damn well where my place is, and you should know by now that since it bothers you, I'm going to stick around for as long as I possibly can. I don't live my life to please you, and if you can't pick a reason to hate me other than things relating to the car accident, my choice in men, or my fashion sense, then maybe you need to re-evaluate things. I'm not asking you to like me, I'm telling you that there are better, and more mature ways of doing so; for instance, _not_ being so condescending to me. So, have a nice day, Victoria," Shay concluded, brushing past Victoria and finding an empty seat, not bothering to take in the girl's reaction. She heard the woman yell a shrill, _Get out of my way_ and the faint sound of someone being shoved aside. Shay shrugged, settling back into her seat and setting her bag on the table.

It felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders and she smiled to herself. With satisfaction, she took the book she kept in her bag out and turned to her marked page. As she read, she hummed to herself, ignoring the world around her. "What a night," she murmured, turning a page.

"Truly. Yeh know, the last time yeh had a little escapade in caterin', yeh smacked Dave."

She looked up, a blush gracing her cheeks as Stephen sat down across from her. Covering her mouth with her hands, she replied, "You were there?"

"Jus' sat down as yer hand came whizzing by his face. Kinda funny now, isn't it? 'Asked him why the pretty blond jus' hit him, an' he told me not to bring it up again. Slappin' folk an' telling 'em to "fuck off"," Stephen shook his head with a smile, "is not very lady-like."

"A lot of things I do aren't very lady-like," she shut the book and rested it in her lap. His hand reached across the table and took hers. He ran his thumb along her knuckles.

"That's refreshin'," he murmured, still smiling as she stood up. He pulled her onto his lap, resting one hand on her hip while the other was laced with hers. She giggled, blushed, leaning down to whisper that they were public. "Good thin' I don't care. Unless yeh think Jay over there's gonna get his knickers in a twist." He gestured with his head towards the other blonde and Shay chuckled. She put her arms on his shoulders and was about to lean in for a kiss when her phone rang.

She heard Stephen mutter a curse and she dug the object out of her pocket, answering it on the fourth ring.

"Hello?"

_"Shay?"_

Shay's eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Yes? May I ask who is calling?"

_"Oh, it's Miranda."_

She mouthed the word to herself. "Miranda?" She saw Stephen mutter another expletive, his hand coming up to rub his forehead. "H-How did you get this number?" Shay looked expectantly at Stephen, but he shook his head. He rested his forehead against her shoulder for a second before reclining back again. His frustration was evident, and she held her breath as the woman answered.

_"I think Stephen gave it to my. Anyway, I was just wondering if you wanted to go to lunch? Where is he, by the way? Connor's been wanting to talk to him...,"_

"Stephen? He's uh... beneath me right now," she bit her lip as Stephen chuckled. Briefly, she wondered if she'd ever be able to not make a double entendre around her. She covered her mouth to stifle the chortle. "A-As for lunch," she paused, trying to search Stephen for an answer. He simply shrugged and she returned to the call, "Sure. L-lunch sounds, uh, great. I'll let Stephen know that Connor wants to talk to him. Next week sound good? Mmhmm, n-now, if you don't mind, I have some business to attend to." She heard Miranda snort and agree, offering a time and date as well. Moments later, she shut her phone and set it back on the table.

"Beneath yeh, eh?" He smirked, stealing a kiss before she could say anything. "It won't be that bad. She hardly bites." He tried to sound convincing, but at this point, it seemed he wasn't even convincing himself. Stephen shot her a smile, and she subconsciously returned it, knowing in her heart that something would go terribly, terribly wrong.


	35. The Day You Say You're Not Afraid

**Well hello there, and guess who finally got off her ass and updated. Me! I apologize for any spelling/grammar errors and the long wait. I only own Shay, and here it goes.**

**Thank you all for sticking around, and the next chapter should be up whenever I get it up. **

**To Infinity and Beyond,**

**Kiwi**

**P.S. If you haven't seen/read Life of Pi yet, do so. It's an amazing book and I loved it and the movie, to pieces.**

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><p>"Yeh know yeh don't <em>have<em> to go, right?" Stephen asked, hands in his pockets as he paced back and forth in the hotel room. Shay was in the bathroom getting dressed, leaving him to wander the room. He paused by the desk and fiddled with the small paperweight before he set it down and returned to pacing. When he looked up again, she had poked her head out.

"I-I have to. I'll go and tell her to l-leave you alone. I still don't know how she got my number," Shay murmured, ducking back into the bathroom. He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair, mumbled under his breath, and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Wasn't me," he proclaimed, even though she already knew that. "Shay, yeh don't know her like I do," he sighed, resting his forehead against his hands. "I don't think you should go. She's... she can be really terrible, Shay. Yeh saw the way she acted when she first met you."

Shay stepped out of the bathroom and went to sit beside him. "Yeah, and?"

"She gets worse than that and right now, she jus' wants a reaction from yeh," he stood, crossed his arms over his chest and stood by the window. He turned to face her again. "She's just tryin' ta worm her way into something. Yeh jus'... yeh don't know her like I do."

"I guess I'll just have to find out," she stated, standing and making her way over to him. Her hand found his and she leaned up on her toes to kiss his cheek.

"Nothin' I say's gonna make you stay, is it?"

"Nope," she popped the 'p' and kissed his cheek again, and then his lips. "I promise, it'll be fine." It was a half-truth; she didn't really want to go and hang-out with the other woman, but she didn't really have a choice. Besides, maybe she could give the woman a slight nudge to leave them alone.

"Mhmm," Stephen murmured, kissing her again. "You're beautiful, Shay. Just... don't let anythin' she says get to yeh." With that, he let her go and she left the hotel room feeling that this wouldn't go well.

The restaurant the redhead had chosen was a high-end cafe with pristine tablecloths and sparkling glasses. A faint aroma of coffee and caramel drifted through the air as she ducked inside. Shay scanned the tables, nearly missing the wave of a perfectly manicured hand. Running her hand through her hair, Shay approached the table and slid into her seat. "H-hello, Miranda," Shay smiled slightly, fingers instantly flitting to play with the hem of her shirt. She allowed herself to study the redhead: brown roots dappled her hairline, hazel eyes speckled with gold, pristine and unmarred skin, and an overwhelming scent of cherry blossoms.

Miranda lifted her eyes to meet Shay's and a smile blossomed across her face. She took Shay's hand as if they were good friends. "Shay. How are you?"

"Fine. I-I'm good. Yourself?" She preoccupied herself with the menu while Miranda chatted, looking up occasionally as to not seem rude. The last thing she wanted was to upset the redhead, just in case Stephen was right when he said: You don't know what she's capable of.

Well, she did, didn't she? She knew exactly what Miranda was capable of, if her track record could be held reliable. Miranda straightened out the tight, white dress she was wearing and brushed her hair over her shoulder.

"So," Miranda leaned over the table, "what's the dirt?"

Shay blinked, "Excuse me?"

"Well...," Miranda drifted off, "what's Stephen like? Huh? Is he still...," she lowered her voice. "Is he still an animal in the sack?"

Shay's eyebrow rose and in the back of her a mind a brief panic started to set in. Her mouth dropped slightly and she swallowed. She didn't know how to answer; they're relationship had hardly—she counted the near-sexual-encounter in Florida—reached that level yet. It was in that moment she realized that Miranda was under the impression that she and Stephen had been together for far longer than they actually had been. Miranda was under the impression she'd be dishing dirt.

"I don't really see how that's any of your business," she stated curtly as their waitress stopped by.

"I'll have the mocha," Miranda said, blinking slowly and trying to brush off Shay's comment.

"Chai tea, please," Shay smiled, handed over the menu, and returned her attention to Miranda.

"I pegged you for a coffee drinker. As I was saying... about Stephen..."

"And I said that it was none of your business. Anything regarding Stephen, and his life, stopped being your business the moment you cheated on him," Shay cut her off and took to fiddling with her silverware. A silence befell them, and Miranda looked around before settling back on Shay.

"Come on, sweetheart. What's past is past, isn't it? Still pegged you for a coffee drinker."

"I drink tea. It's far more relaxing, and Stephen keeps a lot of it on the road, so I drink it," she shrugged. "As for other things concerning him, I'm not going to be talking about them. You had a chance, you blew it, and if he was the only thing you wanted to talk about, there's the door," Shay stated, smiling sweetly as her drink came to her. She paid her thanks and drummed her fingers across the tablecloth.

"I absolutely adore that shirt of yours. Where did you get it?" And there came the idle chat, the bland statements and questions that flew by because she caught the trick before it happened. She knew, deep down, what Miranda's agenda was, and she had figured it out. "You're not as...thin as I expected you to be." Miranda stated off-handedly, and Shay had to stop for a second.

Really? The word almost left her lips, but she bit it down and chewed on the inside of her lip. Absentmindedly, she felt along her stomach and hips. Muscle and skin flitted beneath her fingertips and she swallowed. Silently, she shrugged. "After the car accident, I lost a lot of weight. Mostly because I couldn't sleep, and I forgot about it. I just worked out, you know? Lifted a bunch, threw in some yoga," she silently laughed to herself at the last bit. Yoga never really helped her, partially due to her lack of balance. "W-what did you expect me to be?" She leaned forward, resting her elbow slightly on the table and bracing her chin in her hand. Her hair swept over her shoulder and she smiled.

"Well," Miranda swallowed. "I guess I expected you to be more like me," she drew in a breath. "I just... I thought that he had a specific type. Taller, more petite, sociable... I don't know. I thought that if you were more like me, I wouldn't be so...aggravated."

"Aggravated?" Shay raised her eyebrow, tilting her head quizzically.

"I made a mistake, Shay. I thought I wanted something else, I thought I wanted Connor. Things got so messed up so fast. I fell in love with Connor, and I just acted on it. I fell in love with another man, and when Stephen left, I realized that I loved him more than I did Connor," Miranda sighed and paused, gauging Shay's reaction. When Shay chuckled, Miranda's eyebrow hiked up.

"And, as you can see, he didn't buy it. Miranda, you can't just...throw people around like that. I had issues with that once, and I finally realized that it's not a good thing. What happened between you two is between you and him, and it's not my place to go off about it."

"Surely you know about it."

"That doesn't make it an appropriate conversation, Miranda," Shay concluded with a small breath. The conversation was beginning to tire her. "Read any good books recently? Anything else you wanted to talk about, or did you just call me down here with the intentions of belittling me and gathering information you don't really have the rights to?" She tilted her head again, having come to the conclusion that the only thing the redhead wanted was to talk about Stephen and the story about how things came to pass. Miranda was silent for a moment.

"Maybe you should go."

"Maybe I should," Shay agreed, standing and paying for the drinks. She pinched the bridge of her nose as she exited the building, drawing in a deep sigh and expelling it. Afterward, she swung by the hotel to pick up her duffel bag before heading to the arena.

"How'd it go?" Stephen asked as she approached him backstage.

"Could've been worse," she shrugged, lacing her hand with his and kissing him. "We didn't even eat." A small pout crossed her lips and he chuckled, moving his arms to encircle her waist. "I'm starving."

"Lesson learned, eh? Yeh should start carryin' food in your purse, rather than all that stuff yeh never need. Isn't that what they're meant for anyway? Carryin' things yeh'll need?" He joked, nudging her playfully. "There is such thing as being too prepared."

"Mmmhmm, you know, there probably would be a decline in purse sales if women's pants had actual pockets," she chuckled. "So, while you prepare for the taping tonight, I'm going to swing by catering and get some food. Do you want anything?"

"Nah, but I will take yeh out after the show, yeh know, so yeh don't starve," he grinned and kissed her cheek, tucking hair behind her ear. "I have to go, love." He kissed her lips lightly, "I have a tapin' to do. If yeh get bored, Drew will keep yeh company." He smiled again and leaned back. "An' yeh get to pick where we go tonight."

"Mmmmhn, sounds like a plan, Stan."

"Stan's not invited," he laughed, wrapping his arms around her and spinning her. "An' Stan better not be gettin' any ideas." Stephen leaned in for another kiss, claiming her lips with his again and deepening it as she tilted her head towards him. She felt light, whimsical, and radiant, whereas it felt as though her knees would buckle at the slightest inclination. She had kissed him a dozen or more times before they had gotten together, but she had noticed that it felt different. It wasn't the "falling out of love" different. It was a blossoming flower, flaunting its color to the world. Kissing him on-screen was a rush, this was exhilarating.

"I thought you had to go," she muttered, her hands caressing his neck and threading through his hair. He shrugged and murmured a 'it can wait' under his breath.

"Mr. Farrelly," a man said, tapping Stephen on the shoulder and immediately apologizing as Stephen stepped back. "I just... you're up in five."

"Ah, yeah. Jus'...lost track of time," he smiled broadly, shaking the stagehand's hand. "How've yeh been, Jim? An' how's your wife. She get off the crutches yet?"

"Oh, Sarah? Sarah's great. Thank you. I'd hate to rush you, Mr. Farrelly, but it's time."

Stephen nodded and turned towards Shay. "I'll see yeh after the show, yeah?"

"Of course."

"Root for me?" She couldn't avoid the smile that crept onto her face as his eyes lit up with his smile.

"Always." She kissed him once more, something he dubbed as "good luck", and turned to go into catering. And, in that moment the little pang of fear sprung back into her heart and she realized that perhaps it would be far too easy to fall in love with Stephen. So easy to just let her heart lead her there that she wasn't going to stop it.

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><p>Stephen whistled to himself as he walked back and forth in front of the arena. The majority of the parking lot was empty, and he was waiting. He glanced around, as if to make sure the area was clear. "Just know you're not alone, cause I'm going to make this place your home."<p>

"Oh, so you can sing too. I bet that went over well with Shay. Tell me, is that how you convinced her to give you a shot?" Nick laughed, coming up beside Stephen, who rolled his eyes.

"I'm not interested in startin' anything with yeh, Nick. I'm jus' waitin' for Shay."

"Speaking of her, I'd stop before you got too involved. I mean, unless you banged her already. She still a good fu—," he was cut off as Stephen let out a low growl.

"You're not a stupid man, Nick. I suggest walkin' away."

Nick smirked, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Come on, Stephen. It's not going to work out between you two. This isn't Beauty and the Beast, Stephen. You're not going to end up on top, and you should just forget about it and her."

"It's been years, Nick. Why are yeh still on her case?" Stephen question, glancing at his watch and then across the street. "An', it was in my understandin' that she left yeh..."

"Yeah, she always leaves, then blames the guy for leaving." Nick scowled, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

"You're pathetic, Nick."

"Oh, pathetic? She's the pathetic one, Stephen. And the more you stay around her, the more it's going to rub off on you. You know she kissed me, right? A while ago, in fact, and I can still remember the way she tastes. It's been years since I've been with her, but I remember the way her back arches, and all those little sounds she makes. The ones that just...turn you—," Once again, Nick was cut off, and this time, it was from Stephen gripping his collar and shoving him against the side of an adjacent building. He stood there, shoulders shaking, and stared down at Nick, at the satisfied smirk spreading across the blond's lips.

"Pathetic is when a pitiful excuse for a man can't take no for an answer. Pathetic is someone who verbally abuses his girlfriend. Pathetic is havin' to be reminded day in and day out that you're not as high an' mighty as yeh think you are. I don't wanna remind yeh, Nick, about how pathetic yeh really are. You're just the sad, miserable little man who took his frustrations out on a woman who was so in love with yeh. You're sad she left? Mad? Yeh were the one who pushed her away, and that's pathetic," he stated, backing away and rolling up his sleeves to the elbows. A cool, summery breeze flitted through the sky and he took a deep breath in.

And, from behind, Nick raised his fists and swung.

/

"Stephen!?" Shay called out, rounding another corner with a frustrated sigh. It had been twenty minutes after the show, and she still could not find him. Deciding to try outside, she exited the arena and went out to the sidewalk. "Come on, Stephen."

A clatter caught her attention, and off to the side she could see two people fighting. And they looked remarkably like Nick and Stephen. Jogging to reach them, she bit her lip and surveyed what had happened. From what she could see, Nick's hand was bleeding, and each shared a split lip. "Stephen, Nick, come on guys... cut it out." Shay stated, hoping that the two of them were still within reason. Her pleas fell on deaf ears, and foolishly, she tried to step on.

She came up behind him braced her hand on Stephen's shoulder.

She realized a little too late that that might not have been the smartest idea. At that same moment, Nick had somehow wormed his way behind Stephen. Whirling around, Stephen struck.

It just so happened he missed his intended target.

Shay cursed and staggered, Nick ran off, and Stephen stood wide-eyed. "Shay... Shay...aw fuck."

"Stephen," she could tell from the look in his eyes exactly what he was thinking, and he looked more frightened now than she had ever seen him. He merely let out a small breath and walked past her, her trailing him as he made his way back to the rental. Routinely, he opened the door for her, and set on the way back to the hotel. After a few moments, she tried again. "Stephen...it's...,"

"Can we please just...not talk right now, Shay?" He murmured, and she studied him silently. Faintly under the moonlight she could see the scraped ridges of his knuckles and a halo of green around his eye. His hair was mussed and his shirt dissheveled. He kept shaking his head and avoiding looking at her. The ride to the hotel was long and silent, and frankly, he was starting to frighten her by how uncharacteristically quiet he was being. They got to their hotel room and Stephen rolled his shoulders, grimacing as he did so.

"Stephen," she started, and waited for his response.

"I'm just gonna take a shower, pack up my things, and go," he stated, shaking his head and muttering under his breath. "I'm so fuckin' stupid." She shook her head and sat on the edge of the bed. He barely glanced at her as he gathered a few things and ducked into the bathroom. Shay reclined on the bed, sighing and gingerly brushing her fingertips against her cheekbone. Slivers of pain ran up her face and she hissed. In her mind, she knew he was upset, she just couldn't wrap her mind around why he would want to take off.

Shay laid there and waited for a few minutes after she heard the water cut off. The bathroom door swung open, but he didn't step out. Shay stood and made her way over to the bathroom, entering when he didn't protest. She followed his gaze to the mirror and gasped. A crescent of greenish-yellow circled his eye, and his lip was split, and his eyes were heavy. Her eye was swollen and tinted purple. "Stephen... can we please talk?" She asked, hoisting herself up and onto the counter so she could see nearly eye-to-eye with him. She took his hand in hers. "Please?"

"About what?" He whispered, reaching out to brush his fingers against her skin. "Look at what I did to you, Shay. Why aren't you upset? Yeh should be mad, yeh shouldn't still be here. Yeh shouldn't be lookin' at me like it wasn't my fault; like I'm not guilty," he murmured, resting his forehead against hers. "I'm sorry, Shay. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." His accent had thickened and she held his hand tighter.

"It's alright, Stephen. It's okay."

"Yeh're not mad?"

"Stephen, you didn't know it was me, alright? It's not like you wanted to hit me. I know you didn't. I shouldn't have been right there in the crossfires. It's my fault I got hit. Not yours."

Stephen drew his lip between his teeth and it started to bleed again. Shay shut her eyes for a second, wet a rag, and pressed a corner to his lip. "Shay, it wasn't your fault. I should've seen it was yeh an' I didn't, an' I'm sorry."

"Would you please stop apologizing and stop backing away from me?" Her eyebrow rose and he leaned in towards her. "I know you feel like shit, but it wasn't your fault. You're not Dave, Stephen. You're not Dave, you're not Nick. You're not any of them. Besides you leaving would be you breaking your promise. You promised me you'd leave if I asked you to, and I'm not. I'm asking you to stay. You didn't see who it was, now, come on. It's getting late. Tomorrow, we're going to wake up and we're going to go on with our lives," she stated, putting the finality in the conversation as she slid from the counter top and laced her fingers with his. Absently, she brushed over the scrapes on his knuckles. "Tomorrow, will you tell me what happened?" Stephen nodded wordlessly and slid beneath the sheets. His arm draped across her middle, his hand still in hers and after a while they were silent.

"I was afraid I'd fucked it up with us already. I keep thinking that yeh should leave because that's what my father used to tell me an' my siblings. He said, "Stiofan, if yeh ever hit a woman, yeh're not a real man. He taught me to never raise my hand towards a woman. He told my sisters that it would never be their fault. Thirty-three years an' I kept my promise not to," Stephen whispered. Shay pivoted around to face him. She rested her head against his chest. "I just don't know how you can see this in shades of gray when all I see it as is black and white. Yeh understand why I'm upset, righ'?"

Shay nodded and kissed his jawline, "I understand. And Stephen?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm not scared of you. You've never given me a reason to be. And I'm not going to start just because I got in the middle of a fight that wasn't mine, okay? I'm not scared of you," she repeated herself. "And that's the difference between you and him. He scared me, and you don't."


	36. Forgiveness Is A Simple Word

**Okie dokie, here's the next chapter of MTAF! Only 14 more chapters to go! Woohoo! I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors. **

**I hope you all had a safe and happy holiday season. Please read, review, and enjoy because I love you guys and your feedback, so leave me some as a belated Christmas gift! Lol.**

**To infinity and beyond,**

**Kiwi**

* * *

><p>Stephen sighed, watching her out of the corner of his eye carefully, reading her body movements and trying to copy them. Her shoulders were back, and she was standing tall. One hand was laced with his, the other resting atop of them. She was so calm, as if this sort of thing happened often.<p>

Which, he reminded himself, at some point in her life, did happen a lot. How often did she have to walk into building, hand-in-hand with _him_ and act like everything was alright, when all too clearly it wasn't? He was worried, even after she had reassured him. Once again, he glanced at her, then to his hand. Her eye was still swollen, and still a heavy, stark shade of purple against her skin. It had gotten worse overnight, if that was possible. His hand was still bruised and torn along the knuckles.

"I never thanked yeh, for last night," he murmured, hoping she had heard him. She shrugged and offered him a small smile and a reassured squeeze of the hand.

"You're welcome. I'm glad I could help," she said as he kissed the back of her hand. She knew what he meant, that perhaps her statement meant more to him than she had realized. The two walked into the arena, and Shay pivoted to face Stephen. "A meeting with Creative? This early?"

"Yeah. They wanna start workin' on another feud, after I lose the belt," Stephen replied, adjusting the bag on his shoulder. "I'm gonna go drop this off in my locker room. Wanna wait here until the show starts?"

Briefly, she nodded, and he left. She watched as he left, and as he quickened his pace as he walked past Jay and Cena. Jay. In a single moment every once of positivity left her body. Jay glanced down at Stephen's hand, quizzically, then met Shay where she stood. He looked at her eye, and she saw the anger blossoming in his eyes. The worry, the anger, the bitterness. Then he looked at John, and back at her.

"Shay," he started, slowing his breathing, "what happened to your eye?"

"What happened to Stephen's hand?" John asked, and Shay was about to speak when Jay interrupted.

"Son of a bitch," Jay growled, spinning on his heel and shoving his sleeves up.

"Jay, you don't get it." She stated, following him and placing a hand on his shoulder. He turned slightly, staring back at her.

"I don't? Then tell me what happened to your face. Did he hit you, Shay?" He asked, and she saw in his eyes that regardless of her answer, he was going to confront Stephen. When she didn't answer, he nodded once and continued with her still following. "He did. I can see it. What excuse did he give you? Huh?"

"Jay. You're overreacting."

"The last time I 'under-reacted', I saw you with tubes in your throat and a grim prognosis," he shot back. "I think I deserve an overreaction."

"Stephen already feels like crap for it, Jay. He doesn't need you harking on him too. It was an accident. Okay? It was an accident."

"It was an accident with Dave too, wasn't it? Every damn time it was an 'accident'." Jay snapped, his voice raising. "Every bruise was an accident, every fall, every bone, it was all an accident. And that bastard got off scot-free, just like 90-some percent of them. He nearly killed you and he had no fuckin' penalty, Shay. It all started because of a fuckin' accident!" He took a shaky breath in. "So, pardon my overreaction, but I'm not going to let Stephen escalate."

"You beat the shit out of Dave, Jay. You and Adam went on a crusade, and I'm not letting it happen to Stephen because I made a mistake. Stephen isn't Dave, Jay. John wasn't Dave. Nick wasn't Dave. Comparing them all to each other isn't solving anything. Dave, John, and Nick hurt me. Back then I was scared. I wasn't myself, and now I think I am. And you just have to trust me on this, please," she pleaded, running her hand back through her hair before settling it on her hip.

"Shay, I'd let him take care of this one," John murmured and she stopped in her tracks. Her mind raced, and her blood started to get hot.

"Well, Cena, it's funny you care now when you didn't then. Don't use 'knowing me' as a pathetic excuse because you didn't know me then, and you hardly do now. You didn't intervene because you said it wasn't your business, and it's not your business now. I appreciate the gesture bu-," Shay began, crossing her arms over her chest. Jay interrupted her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"John..." Jay started, "could you just...go? This is something I need to talk with Shay about, okay?" Jay's eyebrows lifted and John seemed to contemplate the idea before conceding. As John walked away, Jay turned to Shay. "Well then," he breathed, as if trying his best to maintain composure. "What happened?"

Shay sighed, relieved, and began explaining it to him. How she walked in on a fight and got caught in the crossfire. "It's not his fault, Jay. He couldn't see who it was, it was nighttime, Nick's blond too... it's not his fault, Jay. Remember when you tried to step in between Adam and Matt? And how long did it take for you nose to quit bleeding?" She asked and ignored the look he shot her.

"Fine," he grumbled as they reached Stephen's locker room. He looked expectantly at her before settling back on the heels of his feet. His arms crossed over his chest. "You'd tell me though, right? If... If something like that ever happened to you again, you'd tell me, wouldn't you?"

Shay swallowed and nodded. "Of course I would, Jay. Of course I would," she smiled softly and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

Jay returned with a weak smile and a one-armed hug. "You're welcome. You just...just promise me you'll tell me."

"I promise, Jay. Just as long as you trust that I know what I'm doing, okay?" She asked and he murmured his agreement.

"So, um... how's the training going?"

"Good. It's going good," she stated, content with the change in subject. After a beat of awkward silence, she sighed. "You're still going to talk to him, aren't you?"

"Talk, yes. Slam into a wall, no." Jay replied, shrugging nonchalantly as Shay rolled her eyes. "What? I'm just going to talk to him. Scout's honor." Jay promised and raised his hand.

"Alright. I'll just go then. I'm starving, and there's this little cafe down the street. Want anything?"

"I'm good, thanks."

She turned and walked away, left the arena, and started off down the street. Soon later she found the little cafe and entered. It was quiet and cozy with only a few people sitting. Shay ordered and received her food and was about to leave with it when, out of the corner of her eye, she saw someone wave her towards him. Carefully, she approached.

Shay frowned, studying Nick's face carefully before her expression faded to a grimace. "He really did a number on you, Nick."

Nick sighed, avoiding her gaze and extending his out the window. "Kinda deserved it, I guess," his hand went back to massage his neck. He shook his head and sighed again, fidgeting in his seat as she took a seat across from him.

"You did," Shay agreed and crossed her arms over her chest. Her lips pursed and a slight silence fell between them. "But, it was my fault." Nick's eyebrow rose.

"So, you put a quarter in your Goliath of a boyfriend and let him wail on me?" Nick question, muttering a slight apology at Shay's glare. "Sorry. I egged him on. Said a few things I shouldn't have. I have... issues with that," he sighed again and shook his head. "I'm just assuming that your Gingerbread Man Boy Wonder told you what happened."

"Actually, he told me his side, and I decided it would be best to just find out from the both of you what happened. After the show, I couldn't find him so I went around the block and found you two duking it out beside a trash can." Shay paused for a moment and gestured to her face. "Tried to step in, which was probably one of the most idiotic things I've ever done..."

"Aside from say 'yes' to me," Nick muttered.

"Aside from a lot of things I did. I ended up getting slugged in the face. Stephen's really upset with himself."

"Wow," Nick mocked astonishment, "you got slugged by a boyfriend and he actually didn't say it was your fault. I'd applaud your progress, but I can't really feel my hand," he lifted his bandaged hand. "I told him that he should forget about you, that you were some stupid dream that wasn't worth chasing. Maybe I dropped a few unflattering _terms_ and vulgarities, I pushed him too far, and he snapped." Nick scratched at his head the best he could with his bandaged hand.

Shay clipped a sigh as she twiddled her thumbs together. "I forgive you, Nick," she murmured, loud enough so that he could hear it. His eyes flashed up to meet hers and his jaw dropped slightly.

"What?"

"I forgive you," her voice had steeled.

"For what, giving you a shiner three years ago? Giving—,"

"For everything." It was true. She had forgiven him. Somewhere, deep in her heart, she found the ability to. He hadn't shown remorse, and he didn't necessarily have to. Forgiveness and Nick never fell into the same category for her. Nick must've picked up on that.

Nick shook his head in disbelief. "Why?"

"I decided that living with hate and anger in your heart hurts more than leaving it there. Once you have forgiven, you can let go. I'm letting go, Nick."

Nick nodded once. "Even for ridiculing you, humiliating you, hurting you... you forgive me? I take it back. Maybe you're not as smart as I thought you were."

"Nick, I don't condone what you did, or what you've probably done to others, but forgiving you doesn't make me stupid. Maybe you don't understand now, and I didn't understand it at first either, but there comes a time in life when you realize what's important. My friends, they're important to me. My job, that's important to me. My family is important to me. Hating you isn't. Thousands of people go on with their lives with anger and hatred in their hearts, and in some cases I understand it, but with me," she paused for a moment to search for the right word. "With me, forgiveness is important."

"I never said I was sorry," he stated, twirling the straw in his drink around. His expression hadn't changed, and he stared unfazed out the window. He bit the inside of his cheek and drew in a breath before repeating himself. "I never said I was sorry."

Shay shrugged and put a hand on his bandaged one. "You didn't have to. I'm not going to let you hurt me anymore, Nick." Shay offered him a smile, and when he didn't return it, she stood. "Goodbye, Nick."

And he focused on his drink, all the more aware that when she said "goodbye", she was truly saying goodbye to him and the mark he had left on her. The mark that once oozed and bled had scabbed over and given way to the new, tougher skin beneath. It had been healed, and he wasn't sure where along the way in her life she had reached the stage. But she had. She set aside her pain to move towards her future, and that goodbye was reassurance that his time in her life had passed. He was an old wound that would soon become a faded scar.

He heard the door open and shut, and cast his gaze out the window. Nick watched as she walked down the sidewalk, looking away when she sent one last look through the window. She had let go, and it didn't feel any different than it did before.


	37. Lasting Impressions

**Welp, I updated late. When was the last time I updated? What...December? Oops. :( Sorry, guys. I lost my motivation for a while and school just kinda killed me, but here I am. I'm back. I only own Shay, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical errors.**

**To infinity and beyond,**

**Kiwi**

**Please read, review, and enjoy.**

* * *

><p>Shay closed her eyes and drew in a breath. She curled and uncurled her fingers into her palms before wiping the sweat that had gathered along the creases of her palm onto her sweatpants.<p>

This was simple.

She had done this more times than she could really count.

Why was she hesitating?

"Shay?"

"Hmm?" She asked, opening her eyes. "I'm getting into the groove, AJ."

"You're sure you're not...doubting yourself?"

"Um... no comment?" Shay said, shrugging slightly as she rocked back onto her heels. Wrestling came naturally to her, she was born into it, and surely a few months off didn't change that. Besides, she had worked relentlessly over the past few months to tie all the ends together. Fixing herself. "I think I'm ready."

"Then slam me into the mat. A gutwrench into a Sharpshooter. Okay?"

"Okay."

"On three," AJ smiled and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "One."

Shay took in another breath.

"Two," AJ sunk into a squat, arms up in guard. Shay mirrored the stance, hopping lightly from foot to foot. She almost quick-started, but instead, she hummed to herself and focused in an her target. As the last syllable left AJ's lips, Shay lunged forward and hooked her arms around AJ's waist. The petite brunette went up in a swell arc before being slammed down into the mat with a small 'oof'. Moments later, Shay had flipped the girl onto her stomach, positioned herself above her, and twisted her friend into a Sharpshooter.

She released the hold as AJ tapped out. Helping AJ up, she pulled her into a tight hug. "AJ!"

"Shay!" AJ reciprocated, "I think this means you're ready!"

A snort came form the ramp and both AJ and Shay sent their gaze to the sound of the voice. Both sighed and frowned when they saw whom it was, and AJ dragged a hand through her hair.

"So she did her finisher, big deal. Doesn't mean she's back to being 100%," Victoria scowled, eyes drifting over Shay as if she were unpleasant to look at, a bug. "Now could we move this Girl Scout meeting out of here, I need to practice."

"Take a chill pill, Victoria, it's not that big a deal," Celeste stated, mouthing an apology to Shay as she started down the ramp to stand beside Victoria. "There's still time left before the taping."

"It's fine. We're done here anyway," AJ dismissed Victoria with a roll of her eyes and followed Shay up the ramp. As she and Shay turned the corner and ducked through the curtain, AJ openly scowled. "Who pissed in her Wheaties?"

"I don't know, frankly, it isn't my problem. I have another meeting with Vince."

AJ looked up and nodded, her eyes meeting Shay's. "About the new storyline?"

"Yeah," Shay smiled back. "I'm excited for it."

"How about your storyline with Stephen?" AJ questioned as the duo walked back to the locker room. "I know, it was going to end at some point, but I'm going to miss seeing you two together on-screen. It was such a good dynamic. It's funny how things worked out, right?"

Shay lifted her eyes to AJ's and shrugged, realizing that AJ was right. It was funny how things worked out, how things worked in her favor for once, how things were great, maybe not perfect, but things were great...it was bizarre. "Yeah, it kinda is."

Life was wonderful. She had a caring significant other, her career was taking off again, and she felt more on-track than she had in a while. Then why did something feel off?

/

"Listen, I promised Shay I'd only talk to you, but should the opportunity arise, I will not hesitate to slam your pretty little face into the wall, got it?" Jay sneered and scowled, shook his head, and continued his pacing. Stephen stood before him, not looking the slightest bit worried that his girlfriend's best friend was threatening him, but rather looking concerned over said girlfriend's best friend acting so bizarrely. He should be concerned, right? It was an open threat, one that he probably did believe, as he believed Jay was extremely heart-felt about aforementioned threat. Still, his expression softened and he ran a hand over his face.

"You're worried."

"Thanks, Captain Obvious," Jay snapped. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Stephen nodded and tucked his hands into his pockets. "I understand, if I were in your position, I woulda done the same thin'. Woulda marched right up to the fella, knocked him alon'side the head, an' give him hell." Yes, he did sympathize with Jay, given the current situation and prior events; Jay was entitled to this reaction. Frankly he was surprised Jay _didn't_ do exactly that. "Actually, I'm kinda surprised yeh didn't attack me. Kudos."

"I promised Shay I'd only talk to you," Jay repeated and dragged a hand backwards through his hair.

"So, out of the fifty-percent of promises yeh keep to Shay, that's the one yeh keep?"

Jay leered a bit, stifled the urge to roll his eyes, and slouched down into the sofa in the locker room. "I keep all my promises to Shay."

"That's a lot of promises."

"Are you going to keep every promise you make to her?" Jay served the comment right back and Stephen shrugged. Jay snorted. "That'd be impossible. But she cares about you, and I have to respect that. We've actually been getting along, since that little riff we had. So, here I am, just going to talk to you about what happened."

"Sounds reasonable," Stephen replied as he sat across from Jay. "Am I allowed to say anythin', or would you rather have the floor?"

"Shay explained to me what happened, it's just...," Jay leaned forward and rested his elbows on his thigh and buried his face in his hands. "You don't understand, Stephen. You really don't. I can't... I don't know if I can handle picking up the pieces again, because each and every time she breaks, there are more and more pieces Adam and I can't put back together. I'm not asking you to be the be-all-end-all with Shay, it's not that. And, if you two do break up somewhere along the line, I know she'll probably be heartbroken... all I'm asking is that you..."

"Shay an' I are gonna get into fights, Jay..," Stephen began, but Jay cut him off with a hand.

"Listen, alright? I've almost lost her so many times, Stephen that you don't understand how scared I was when I saw her earlier. You don't know what it's like walking into a hospital room and seeing your best friend lying there, and you don't know if she's going to make it. You didn't know what it was like, seeing her hurt and seeing her turn us away time and time again. I'm afraid of losing her, Stephen," Jay took in a breath and swallowed harshly before he cleared his throat. "I'm not trying to bribe you, or whatever, I just wanted to let you know what she means to me. You're good for her, and I just want to make sure something like what happened never actually happens again, clear?"

Stephen nodded, understanding fully what Jay was getting at. "I promise it won't, Jay."

"Out of all the promises you make, will that be one you keep?"

/

"So, Ms. Hart, I hope you're prepared," Vince stated as he peered over his glasses at the blonde across from him. Shay's eyebrow rose in curiosity and she leaned forward to listen better, thinking that perhaps she misheard.

"Huh?"

"Your storyline, Shay. You turn on Stephen and cause him to lose the title to Big Show. Your heel turn goes from there, but we just need something to really solidify the turn with the fans," McMahon explained, shuffled a few papers around, and folded his hands together atop the table. "Since you two were the 'Face Couple', it only makes sense."

"Okay," Shay nodded and bit the inside of her lip. Truth be told, she had expected this to happen sooner or later. It was work, it was strictly business. "Sir, you still haven't told me whom I'll be facing at the taping."

"I didn't?" Vince asked. "Well, Victoria. You'll be facing Victoria."

Shay wanted to add that this revelation was something she probably should've expected. Luck would have it her return match would be against the one woman who arguably hated her more than really necessary. The other Divas were indifferent, and at least tolerated her to the point where there was a civil peace. This was Vince's decision, and few people could sway Vince's decision. She nodded and shook Vince's hand after they spoke more in-depth on her upcoming storyline, and when she left his office and returned to the hotel she found Stephen waiting for her.

"_Victoria?_" Stephen asked and shook his head. "An' he's not worried she'll do somethin' out-of-the-box?"

"No," Shay sighed and crossed her arms over her chest. "I haven't done anything outlandish to her, besides, she's a smart girl. She wouldn't risk doing anything Creative didn't plan."

"Unless, of course," Stephen paused to take a swig of his water, "it made things more interestin'."

"Stephen, don't talk like that," she settled beside him on the edge of the bed. "The taping's in a couple of hours." Stephen shrugged and she felt his hand on her knee. "What if I suck?"

"Love, that's the nerves talkin'. Yeh'll be fine," for reassurance, he kissed her and smiled as she did. "Everything'll be fine. I won't even be mad when yeh hit me over the head with a steel chair," Stephen chuckled and intertwined his fingers with hers.

"Nothing ends a romance quite like a steel chair to the head," Shay replied as she leaned up to kiss his cheek. She leaned against him with her head on his shoulder. "So," she murmured, brushing her thumb along his knuckles, "how long until the taping?"

Depends," Stephen said as his eyebrow raised in her direction, "on what you're plannin'."

"Well," Shay began, swinging one leg over his lap to straddle him, "that depends on how much time we have." The blonde moved her arms to drape along his shoulders and ran a hand up through his hair. Stephen smirked and rested his hands on her hips. Just as her lips were about to ghost over his, the loud, incessant buzz of her phone cut through the air and she cursed under her breath.

"Hello?" She asked with a sigh.

"It's Adam."

"Adam?" Shay grinned, eyes lighting up. "I miss you. What's up?"

"Jay told me what happened," Adam replied and Shay let out another small sigh, muttering under her breath because of _course_ Jay called Adam. Why wouldn't Jay call Adam? "He also told me it was an accident, and that he talked to Stephen. But...,"

"I'm fine, Adam," she whispered, "Okay? I'm fine. I-It's already starting to fade, and it's nothing. It was an accident."

There was silence from Adam's end and for a second, Shay thought he had hung up. "Okay."

"Okay? Just 'Okay'?" Shay stood from her spot and sent an apologetic nod towards Stephen. She wrapped her free arm around her middle and walked over to the window of the hotel room.

"Okay, as in okay. I just wanted to check up on you. Hear it from you. I don't believe it if it doesn't come from you," Adam released what sounded like a relieved breath. "So, uh, you return tonight? Against Victoria?"

Her eyebrow rose, "Did Jay tell you that too?"

"So what if he did. Jay tells me ninety-five percent of things that concern me. Anyway, you feeling right about this?"

"Probably as right as it's ever felt," Shay drew her lip in between her teeth. And it was. It felt right this time, not rushed or haphazard as her returns usually felt. Her body was strong and whole again, like all the pieces she had wanted to find were in alignment.

"Just so you know, I'm proud of you. And I believe in you, and you still got it."

Shay's lip turned up in a smile. "Thanks, Addy. Um, I have to go...the taping starts soon, so I'll talk to you later, okay?" The clock on the wall chimed a time and she mentally cursed.

"Okay, and Shay?"

"Yes?" She balanced the phone between her shoulder and ear as Stephen tossed her her shoes. Shay mouthed a thank you. "Adam?"

"Kick some ass tonight."

"Will do."

/

"From Calgary, Alberta, Canada..._Shay_!" The announcer's name boomed throughout the arena and Shay's heart beat patterns against her ribcage as she walked down the ramp. A roar surrounded her, encompassing her, welcoming her back to where she belonged.

She ducked between the top and middle rope before jumping onto the turnbuckle. Her music faded and she went to the center of the ring to await her opponent. Alicia's theme blasted through the arena and Shay set her jaw. It was showtime. Everything came back to this match. It would be short, and she needed to get her point across that she was ready.

Moments later, the bell tolled and the two locked onto one another. The match went back and forth, with Alicia gaining an upper hand. The brunette wrestled Shay to the floor.

"Tonight is Shay's first match back after she was sidelined in March," Cole informed the crowd. "And it looks like she could've had a little bit more time to practice."

"Hey, she's probably just getting back into the groove of things. Back off, Cole," Lawler scowled, shaking his head before returning his attention to the ring.

Shay got to her feet, bracing herself against the ropes before running forward and catching Alicia in a clothesline. Intertwining her fingers into Alicia's hair, she pulled the other woman to stand before whipping her against the ropes. She beat her down with swift strikes and holds until Alicia stayed down. Then she waited. A lion stalking its prey, she waited.

Alicia stumbled to her feet, and stumbled into a Gutwrench Powerbomb. Alicia slammed against the mat with a slight recoil, and Shay could hear the commentators wince with sympathy. The blonde tosses her hair over her shoulder, and with deliberate motion, locked Alicia into the Sharpshooter.

"And your winner is..._Shay_!" The announce stated, holding Shay's hand up in victory. After the applause died down, Shay took the mic and knelt down beside Alicia's face.

"How was that for an impression, Alicia?" Shay turned her focus to the audience. "Did you expect anything less, ladies and gentlemen? Harts make impressions, and it's about time I've made mine. I am severing myself from the person I was before. I am breaking apart, I am sick and tired of being treated like some slab of arm candy. This is my time, and this is my legacy."

The mike dropped from her hand and she tilted her head to the side with a grin as "The Good Life" by Three Days Grace announced her departure.


End file.
